valentineisnotmyfather

[valentineisnotmyfather]

Here's a comic I made a few years ago, explaining autistic meltdowns and shutdowns in detail! They can be pretty different to what you might expect- I didnt even realise I was experiencing them for years. I thought they were panic attacks that just happened to last much longer than an average person's, or that I was very sensitive- newsflash, it was actually autism lol

[valentineisnotmyfather]

if you want to actually start to end homelessness, you need to give homeless people unconditional homes, including when we use them to do drugs or sit around drinking. either housing is unconditional or it isn’t

someone sitting at home alone, an active alcoholic, squandering your charity, drinking all day is better situation than a street homeless alcoholic. someone using drugs in your charity house is better than them doing the same w no shelter

most of you would not like most street homeless people, I definitely don’t and didn’t when I was street homeless. for every one person who uses unconditional shelter to turn themselves around, someone else will do jack shit and very slowly, if ever, work through the issues that made them homeless, will maybe never be able to live independently. still better than street homelessness, still worth doing. ultimately either you believe that shelter should be universal or you don’t

homeless people actually can’t be rehabilitated if you want to end homelessness. we either affirm the right to shelter for the worst drunken, lying, filthy, cheating, self destructive homeless people that exist, genuinely irredeemable wankers, or we concede that shelter is not a right

[valentineisnotmyfather]

"homosexuality is unnatural! there's only two genders! it's a sin-"

I'm sorry, have you seen NATURE???

ALSO THE ARTIST IS HUMON, FIND THEM AT HUMONCOMICS.COM!! was so sure I had included that but apparently I forgot, so sorry!

and there's so many more species than this that exhibit homosexuality, varying genders, etc. SO! MANY!

it's very much a natural thing. it always has been. unfortunately, while homosexuality is found in many species, homophobia is only found in one

EDIT: added a keep reading cause this is a long post lol

EDIT: everyone in the comments needs to shut up or I will turn comments off, stop arguing, jeez

[valentineisnotmyfather]

Just so we’re all clear, it is okay to miss people you no longer want in your life.

[valentineisnotmyfather]

autism awareness & autism acceptance not either or. not mutually exclusive. can coexist. need coexist.

“there enough awareness for autism already 🙄 we need acceptance”

ok. you aware of high support needs autism? aware what that even means? not “need reminder take meds need remind take shower” “high” support needs autism, but “need full physical help do bADLs lack danger awareness may accidentally hurt self or even kill self without support” high support needs autism? not just higher support needs people who can be independently online do advocacy, but those who need help from others even be online, or those who cannot be online at. all.?

aware of nonverbal nonspeaking people? not just nonverbal nonspeaking people who can write grammatically correct cannot tell apart base on writing. not just nonverbal nonspeaking people who can be online who can advocate online.

aware of nonverbal nonspeaking people who cannot communicate in way that easily understood, either for now, or ever? aware of nonverbal nonspeaking people without functional communication, aware of how without functional communication, how that drastically limit communication, even though behaviors are valid communication? aware of nonverbal nonspeaking people who may never use AAC fluently even with best support?

aware of technically verbal but very limited verbal autistics who may only able say wants & needs but not other things and certainly not online advocacy, “despite being verbal”?

aware of just how much our life depends on caregiver/carer/PCA/etc? aware how vulnerable that make us? aware of abuse from caregivers? aware of caregiver burnout from lack of support for caregivers, & how that impact our care we receive? have you even heard of term respite care? aware of those of us who cannot separate ourselves from caregiver? aware of those of us who cannot participate in autism community without caregiver?

aware of visibly autistic people? aware how we not automatically believed? aware how we often bear blunt of violence because we most easily identified target because we visible? aware visible =/= get support, aware that many those diagnosed severe who now adult so no longer qualify for services under 21 year old, languish in hospitals because nowhere to go? aware how long life saving necessary waitlists are? aware that even to this day parents have to fight school fight day service fight government fight insurance for them give their nonverbal nonspeaking child AAC & be properly taught how use it? actually, are you aware of how properly teach AAC to nonverbal nonspeaking, developmentally delayed child who may or may not have intellectual disability?

actually, aware of autistics with (correctly diagnosed) intellectual disability & how they make up big amount of autistic? aware of institutional systemic & legal impact of mental [r word] right & the human rights abuse justified using r word right? wait, you aware that r word come from old term for intellectual disability, that, actually, still in many laws because no one bothered updating, right? aware of what severe profound ID look like? and aware they real and they still human deserve education deserve life deserve care, yes?

aware of early diagnosis 20 30 or even 10 years ago, not same as now, even less resources & knowledge about autism now? aware that while gender race class 1000% impacted diagnoses, a lot of early diagnosed people early diagnosed because… they die without support unlocked by diagnosis, right? but also, aware that in old times, early diagnosis often did mean doom, not because autism bad or anything, but because severe lack of support & diagnosis can literally bar you from so many things including basic education?

aware that for many people in special education, which impact specific group of autistic people, they not get degree when graduate high school, they just get certificate, which limit their educational & employment opportunities & others?

aware of life saving importance and necessity of masking for autistic of color especially Black autistic people, despite stress inducing traumatic? aware that live in broken system be victim of hate crime & police brutality just as traumatic often even more traumatic than masking? aware that many Black & other parents of color forced to teach their child masking because of this?

are you aware of most marginalized autistic people? aware of leadership of most impacted?

aware you can and need to care about autistic experiences & form of autism you not experience? aware that you can and need to do that without try twist your experience into our experience into our words our community?

aware that advocacy goes beyond about you?

aware that you can’t speak for all autistic? aware that you shouldn’t speak for all autistic?

are you aware of when you need to stop talking & listen & amplify others? aware of when and how to decenter self?

aware that even this long post, barely scratch surface? still so much to say?

[better worded version of original post]

[valentineisnotmyfather]

[valentineisnotmyfather]

I've rarely seen a more validating sentence in my entire life.

[valentineisnotmyfather]

Hey yall if you can! Donate to Mercury's and Jory's fundraiser for Point of Pride!!

https://secure.givelively.org/donate/point-of-pride/2024-tiktok-a-thon-for-trans-health

[valentineisnotmyfather]

Also this autism acceptance and awareness month please stop using the term going Nonverbal or going nonspeaking when you are having a temporary loss of speech. Use a term like verbal shutdown or speech loss episode instead. As a Nonverbal autistic I am tired of speaking people using the term Nonverbal or nonspeaking to describe their verbal shutdowns

[valentineisnotmyfather]

Hey yall if you can! Donate to Mercury's and Jory's fundraiser for Point of Pride!!

https://secure.givelively.org/donate/point-of-pride/2024-tiktok-a-thon-for-trans-health

[valentineisnotmyfather]

“why do i believe this” and “who benefits from me believing it” are the first steps to decolonization and we should all be doing this more

[valentineisnotmyfather]

[valentineisnotmyfather]

SLEEPSOMNIA!

A short comic about comorbidity rates between autism and various sleep disorders, from autistic people's own reports and accounts of their experiences.

I originally made this for #asdcomictakeover 2023, but my schedule was woeful and I didn't get it finished until many months after autistic acceptance month. But I figured I should have it somewhere on the internet before 2024 rolls around. Thanks for reading! Please understand that I'm just one person and I'm by no means a medical authority. This is not a diagnostic tool, but it does highlight the reality that many autistic people face with chronically disordered sleep patterns. I hope it can help for autistic people to seek help and feel understood if they fall into these comorbidities.

[valentineisnotmyfather]

i keep seeing misinformation about this, so: queerplatonic relationships do not have a set definition. the name comes from the idea that it's "queering" the platonic relationship, tailoring it to the individual relationships' own desires. it isn't necessarily romance lite, but it also isn't necessarily whatever definition you want to impose on it. the point of queering the platonic relationship is to break away from strict allonormative views on friendship, romance, and sex, not to make a new categorical box to fit in.

the answer to "what is a qpr?" is "whatever you want it to be." sometimes that is romance lite. sometimes it's a deeply committed friendship. sometimes it's friends who have a sexual relationship. sometimes it's based on an entirely different mode of attraction. sometimes it's fluid and impossible to put into words. it's whatever you want it to be. it's queer.

[valentineisnotmyfather]

I used to think I was attracted to men and maybe trans because I would look at mlm couples and be like I want that I want boyish love I want to wrestle and give each other shit and punch each other on the shoulder and be a little messy and dumb together I wanna blush at each others arm muscles. Turns out I’m just a butch who likes butches. Revelation. Didn’t know you could do that but it’s so cool like yeah show me your truck’s special features buddy I’m gonna kiss u stupid later. Oh u basically wore a gym outfit on our date that’s so hot actually, can I interest u in me slipping my fingers up the hem of your basketball shorts when I touch your knee? oh u cuddle me by spooning me in a half assed headlock that’s so cozy. I love being a boyish lesbian I love boyish lesbians I am kissing you all on the mouth

[valentineisnotmyfather]

let's play a game it's called how long can i pretend i don't have basic needs and human emotions

[valentineisnotmyfather]

eveeyones got it wrong your mid 20s arent for going to the club or partying or picking up new crafts. your 20s are for discovering how much more autistic you are than you thought you were in high school