the sun brings out the poems
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the best poem in the world
yesterday i wrote the
best poem in the world.
words flowed smoothly,
elegantly, fell in just the right place,
at the right time, with perfect
count of syllables and sweet mellifluous
diction.
the prose was crisp like fresh picked
lettuce and heavy cucumber slices
with just a bit of salt. reading it began
with clear water from the filter
poured into a never used glass.
It chills it slightly.
condensation forms on the glass
and you pick it up with your coarse
hand from chopping wood and
artificially inseminating horses
and you spread your thin bird lips
and gulp it down, your throat
gaping open like the wide-cut canals
of new york city.
it's so refreshing your whole
body shudders in ecstasy
your bladder voids
your colon erupts
tears sublimate
spontaneously
your heart palpitates so unmercifully
it stops. and as time slows down
demoralized, anesthetized,
you simply
die.
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hopeless or otherwise
romantics are sad creatures.
never be with a romantic
you will never be enough
and even if you are
you won’t;
they cling to 'what ifs'
they fall in love with moments
and ideas
and moods
and sunsets
with paradoxes
and all things beautiful
and all things fleeting
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the bars
lead us not into the bars
lead us not into the nice bars
the dingy bars
the rooftop bars
the familiar bars
the new york bars
the seedy hook-up bars
the basic bitch bars
the hidden bars with the entrance in the shitter
the open mic bars
the karaoke bars
the gay bars on polished cobblestoned streets
the underwhelming beer bars
the bars with a cover
the patio bars
the bars with three dollar shots
the bars where they pretend life is good
the bars where you're blacklisted because
you smashed a glass and fought the bouncer
but it's okay because they distill their
vodka with cat piss
the bars with the tits and good coke bathrooms
the red red wine bars where your friend works
and the drinks are on the friend
the day drinking bars
the birthday bars
the bars of sweet salvation
lead us not into the bars so
we can have a good night's sleep
a healthy liver
a solid morning’s dump
and not much else.
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sweet bird
my student took it at both ends
we raw-dogged her all night;
at light she leaves and says, “oh friends
you have my number, right?”
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a small bow legged dog
I saw a bow legged dog
Walk like it’s master
To blend in
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covid positive bitches
a lady called
and she told me i have covid
it’s the best news
i’ve had all month
at least it's not lyme
tho who knows, it could
be both. fuck.
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Margs
A girl walks in
in jeans and tall leather boots;
a goddess, with green eyes and short straight
blonde hair. I want to weep for humanity
such moments are like
witnessing God himself.
she floats with grace
and smiles too often
and tears out my heart a year later,
in the gym, of all places.
sure, I smile because it happened.
i'll smile. i'll smile.
i'll smile.
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a solid five
her mouth always
seemed full even
though she wasn’t eating.
on the standard frat scale she was a solid 5,
at best a side-chick,
a lazy Sunday, downtrodden fuck
reachable at every three
am.
what a scene,
big milky tits, long awkward legs
that have never seen a treadmill,
always stoned,
always wet,
gets off from vaginal alone,
and never wants to spend the night because I
didn’t never had any weed.
we always fucked like
rabid dogs and
as soon as i saw her walk to the bathroom
i wanted her gone. it worked out well
that way.
she really was a solid five.
but tonight she’s in california, and
tonight... she’s an eight.
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i’m just smart enough to feel truly stupid
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a guy with
a creepy perfect smile
offers hugs for free
and as he hugs you
he whispers in your
ear that a small
donation would be
appreciated and that
pictures are 5 dollars
but if you tag him
in the gram its
only two dollars
its worse than free
its hidden costs
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I can't love you while I'm fat
I'll love you when I'm thin again.
I'm beefing for the winter,
eating double-bagels every morning,
double-toasted, everything and
wheat, packed with
more cream cheese than sense.
I am the grand jew of new york,
praying not for redemption but
for strength to sin better, harder
and longer. I want a tough liver
and head than can take a
(serotonin) hit. I want a plump
domestic girl before the real
cold comes in to keep my bed
warm and my nerves frayed
who forgets to take her pill
and lectures me that cocaine
is bad, so bad, bad, bad!
"I'm working on it, baby" I'll tell her.
I'm working on me, my job,
my shape; the only thing one
can do in America is to work on
the self (and commit suicide
while workin for another)
and halfway lose sight and
drown in what one wants,
in what one thinks one needs
but doesn't. the truest happiness
lies in working hardly and
living fruitfully. true happines is
easy as long as you have health.
the rest is fiction, I know this now.
three decades have slipped by.
that's three lives of a dog, a dozen of a rat.
there's no need for fear.
there's no need for more.
first come the small things
like my double-toasted bagels.
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I can't hate free beer
Saturday and high and the immediate tendency
is to remodel
my state
of mind with alcohol but I have to do chest later
and I'm not sure
what it
would do to my ability. At any rate, I figured, one
beer couldn't hurt
the gains.
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the unraveling
I wasn't exactly
regimented with
my drink, my drug,
my food, my anything
that one could
use apple
pay for and
it was probably
about time
shit caught up with me.
I started to piece
that something
was badly wrong
when I went a bit
too hard one sunday
and woke up with eyes
the size of eight
balls, two days
later-zero miles, triple
digits calls, DMs,
texts, tweets,
combined-two
days that flew
by like a spark
and left
impressions but
not memories.
One can’t live with
ones notifications
everlastingly
on loud; we all
want peace once
in a while.
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the fiat attractor
the inside of
the left side of
my mouth is numb
and I am now
a quant.
if you were to tell
me
five years ago that in
five years I would be
in finance
I would have said
“fuck yourself”
and gone back to my adderral
fueled existence pumping out
hundreds
of pages
of hand
made
derivations
for twenty
two k
a year
oblivious to the world,
the world,
oblivious to me,
single,
free,
with potato by my side,
and truthfully,
the happiest
i'd ever be.
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the more i looked at the world
the more i wanted out
because i could no longer tell if
it was always this way and i was a
part of it or change had taken place.
if i had to guess, it was always like
this. always shit.
how blind i must have been.
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facts
i am tired
i will sleep
but i wont rest
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