4getme4ever

[4getme4ever]

i’m starting to feel like i’m fading away

[4getme4ever]

I don't even like blasting my ray gun anymore. I don't like flying my UFO around anymore

[4getme4ever]

i was going to learn 12 languages, read 250 books and learn 75 new skills this year what happened

[4getme4ever]

hey, don’t cry. one half flour one half yogurt knead into dough and fry for easy flatbread and dip in balsamic vinegar, okay?

[4getme4ever]

autism memes made by neurotypicals: you say i'm autistic, i say i'm AUSOME! 😋🥰🙏 autism memes made by autistic people: the sun is too loud and it takes me three hours to get out of bed.

[4getme4ever]

Imagine my shock as a neurodivergent teen when I first realized that using large vocabulary and eloquent speech doesn't make you less likely to be misinterpreted, rather it adds an entirely new layer of misinterpretation I had never even realized existed in the form of people thinking you're being snobbish or condescending when you're just trying to be specific

[4getme4ever]

[4getme4ever]

Meltdowns

Autisticality

[4getme4ever]

My gender was never a thing. It simply never existed.

[4getme4ever]

Why do people always assume that everything I do or say has malicious intent behind it? I ask questions because I want answers because maybe I'll be able to assist you and I get called judgemental. I ask for clarification for what you're saying because I wanna know the intention behind your words and I'm told I'm picking apart your words. I just don't understand.

[4getme4ever]

whenever anyone says they are “okay with gay people as long as they don’t make it their whole personality” it makes me so sad.

firstly, we should not merely be tolerated. secondly, you’re clearly homophobic and your tolerance extends only so far as your comfortability for that which is different. finally, why should we not make out personality who and what we love? i would rather be defined by my love any day than hatred or indifference.

[4getme4ever]

They should publish books in this format.

FYI: There are apps and plug-ins of this Bionic Reading for Google Play, Chrome, Microsoft Edge (Internet Explorer), Firefox, iOS (Apple) and on WEB

[4getme4ever]

"Not everything is about your autism."

Actually it is. My autism effects:

How I see the world, including light sensitivity

How I interact with the world, including difficulties with social interaction, speech difficulties and processing disorders

How I feel the world around me, including hyposensitivity or hypersensitivity to temperature, pain, or stimuli as well as proprioception which can make it difficult for me to physically navigate the world

How I feel my body, including interoception which can lead to missed meals, dehydration, and even urinary urgency (which is a problem just by itself) because I don't notice the signals my body gives

How I relate to those around me, due to my alexithymia, so often I feel nothing or can not work through the bodily sensations that indicate emotions.

How I cope with the world, including needing to stim, escape noises others may not hear, or requiring accommodations to help me survive an "average" day

How I rest after a normal day, including delayed sleep onset, reduced melatonin and increased cortisol, making getting to sleep a 2 hour long endeavour and staying asleep a task unto itself

So yes.

This is all about my autism.

[4getme4ever]

Friendly reminder that the reason you feel so much better is because of your meds, don’t stop taking them unless you talk to your doctor first, you really do need them, I promise. 

[4getme4ever]

I think I may be autistic but I have no idea what to do with this information and I'm also kind of worried im trying to make myself fit into it if that makes sense? I have been diagnosed with ADHD officially, but I'm not sure, maybe I have both?

"Am I Autistic or Not" isn't really a helpful question. It's so big, and so abstract. Try asking yourself questions that are smaller and more concrete. Things like:

Which sensations are really difficult for me to handle? Do I experience sensory overloads? What can I do to reduce or prevent future sensory overloads?

Which sensations are really pleasurable for me? How can I incorporate more of those sensations into my life?

What activities or topics do I find very stimulating, thought-provoking, or exciting? How can I make more time in my life for pursuing those activities? Where can I meet other people who also enjoy those things?

Which aspects of socializing do I find hard? What do I find draining, uncomfortable, or confusing? Is there anyone I can ask for help understanding the things I find confusing? Are there social performances I can try doing less often, or less intensely?

Which activities seem to drain me more than other people, and how can I get the rest I need? Do I need far more recharge time after socializing than most people I know? Do organizational or administrative tasks like cleaning my house or answering emails take a lot of out me? Is there anyone I can ask for support, or any responsibilities I can let go of (or half ass)?

Finally, where do I feel at home? Which spaces make me feel comfortable? Which communities seem to get me? Who do I enjoy being around? Who brings out a playful, lighter, opener side of me? Where do I hate being and who do I dread being around? What do I need out of my home environment in order to feel at peace? How can I bring more of the positive into my life and reduce my contact with the negative?

Are you Autistic, Anon? -- my answer is, who cares? It doesn't matter. You don't ever have to answer that if you don't want to. Use whatever term you want, whenever it feels right. In the meantime, find the spaces, experiences, and people that help you feel less broken. That might include Autistic spaces, as well as other neurodivergent or queer ones. That's fine. Explore widely. Each one of us is a complex enough person that we can't be contained entirely by a single community, identity label, or space.

Private questions of identity matter very little if we aren't actually living out that identity in community with other people. Find the spaces, people, and activities that are good for you -- and if many of them are also very good for Autistic people, well then congrats, you're our kin, whether your choose to adopt the label or not.

Further reading:

[4getme4ever]

"What words are there to describe the situation when I suddenly can't speak anymore?" - Masterlist

(correct me if I'm not aware of some nuances, and please add other words in the comments)

If you suddenly can't speak/struggle to speak:

losing words

losing speech/speech loss

speech loss episode

situational speech loss

going/being silent

becoming/being unspeaking

verbal shutdown

verbal crash

low/weak verbality

Handle with care (because it can be misunderstood easily as it reminds of selective mutism, which under no circumstances should be mixed up):

autistic mutism

If you can't even make sounds:

going/being mute (people who are always mute and those with selective mutism, please tell me in case that's not for those who only experience it sometimes - I'll delete it in that case)

Some general words:

being/becoming voiceless

being tight-lipped/tongue-tied/close-mouthed

being verbally uncommunicative

being untalkative

being tacit/taciturn

If you want to express that you only use nonverbal communication to communicate:

communicating nonverbally/using nonverbal communication - NOT being nonverbal, that doesn't refer to you using nonverbal communication and is something else entirely ☝🏼

If you want to express that internally you're really struggling with speech atm, but you're able to force yourself to speak:

masked-verbal

If you can't speak anymore and can't make sense of language anymore simultaneously:

losing language

If you could speak theoretically, but simply choose not to do so (or to speak less):

word resting (for example if you want to save energy)

choice verbal

...let me know if you know more ☝🏼

Some newly coined terms I find really cool by @archival-arrival , might especially be interesting for those who aren't autistic (definition in the linked post):

nullvox

tacevox/tacetvox

siovox

siofoni

ochifoni/chorisfoni

ochilogia/chorislogia

pagofoni

pagolexei/pagologia

[4getme4ever]

part of being autistic is slowly realising that you actually live in chronic pain and all your random little physical blips and errors might actually be caused by a chronic illness???

No, but seriously, no one told me that it doesn't hurt their elbows when they shake sauce bottles... it doesn't hurt their wrists and hands to write.... it doesn't hurt their feet to drive.... they don't randomly "lose grip" on objects or find keyboards or controllers difficult to hold... I was under the assumption this was all relatively normal?

Part of the reason I didn't realise this is because I don't always realise I'm in pain. My autism already makes me hyposensitive to pain, but because my "neutral" is to always be in like a 3/10 pain state, I don't always know that I'm in pain...