ahsterism

[ahsterism]

bonzo at the club.........

#can't stop thinking about the tmagp episode #not ev ne the horror (well yes the horror but) im just CRYING over bonzo at the club #bonzo at the club save me from my tasks #✧ ooc #tmagp spoilers #KIND OF?

[ahsterism]

i refuse to apologize for being weird or offputting actually that's your problem i'm having a fantastic time

#✧ gerard keay. musings / every night i burn waiting for the world to end #✧ remus. musings / you think i’m unfit‚ little did you know that i was cut for it #✧ cyno. musings / your sins weigh upon your soul #✧ stelle. musings / floating in outer space‚ have i misplaced a part of my soul? #✧ queue

[ahsterism]

I think more media should work with the concept that you can still love someone you never forgave. You can still rebuild and create a new relationship with someone but also be "what you did to me was wrong and I trust you to not be like that again and want you in my life but I can't won't forgive that, won't forget the hurt you caused. I love you but there will be days I won't be able to see you because the trauma you gave me is back and I'm just so angry and sad and at least you never asked for forgiviness just to be here, just for friendship, because you know that this are things I can give you."

#✧ jonathan sims. musings / i refuse to become another goddamn mystery #✧ dyn. jon & daisy #✧ queue

[ahsterism]

that one Gallagher “Thirteen” tarot card theory has been in my brain

#THE SKULL IS INSANE #✧ gallagher. visage / i’ll meet judgment by the hounds #✧ queue

[ahsterism]

Redrew this image with my boy, he deserves it

#✧ gerard keay. visage / and like the blade you stain well i’ve been holding on tonight #✧ queue

[ahsterism]

man who keeps misspelling "hope" as "hole" lives in constant fear of freudian typo

#✧ makoto naegi. musings / i have to bear the burden of hope #✧ queue

[ahsterism]

jonathan sims and weight gain as a sign of healing thanks

#no he never heals BUT A BITCH CAN DREAM #scottish safe house au :((( #he’s just SOOO UNHEALTHY. GET SOME MEAT ON THOSE DAMN BONES #should happen in a non apocalypse au where somehow magically everything is fine. Trust Me i’m employed at rusty quill #✧ ooc

[ahsterism]

took a break from my work to do this

#‘took a break’ as if i didn’t do this in a meeting #no i haven’t written a single thing for gallagher. yes i felt compelled to draw this #he’s just a little silly #✧ ooc #mun art.

[ahsterism]

Outtakes and promo shoot for Found Heaven

#lowkey this jacket is just so #✧ saint. musings / such a young soul and you got lost and out of control #his fits are usually more haru core HOWEVER- #✧ queue

[ahsterism]

#✧ gerard keay. musings / every night i burn waiting for the world to end #girl help i meant to put this in my queue. ig not JSKSJDKD #wyd at the coffee shop in italy girl!

[ahsterism]

nakajima atsushi [05.05]

— “No matter where I run, the tiger follows. It’s the same as the way I can’t escape the beating of my own heart… for you’re my strength to keep living.”

#✧ atsushi nakajima. visage / remember how to put back the light in my eyes #✧ queue

[ahsterism]

love when a man has dark brown eyes and an air of impending doom about him

#✧ jonathan sims. musings / i refuse to become another goddamn mystery #✧ gerard keay. musings / every night i burn waiting for the world to end #✧ travis martinez. musings / there is no ravenous spirit like that of the grief stricken #✧ gallagher. musings / erasing years of senseless waiting‚ you’ve got addictions too #'they're orange' fuck off #✧ queue

[ahsterism]

protocol gerry is still goth by the way. arguably even more goth because he’s not having to dress for constant travel. he’s still goth he just has a way better dye job now, in fact no one can understand how he still keeps his hair healthy like that. he just does.

#i just needed to put this out there #it is important to me that he’s still goth everyone saying he isnt is WRONG #✧ gerard keay. headcanons / as he fell away for the final time‚ he felt that all-consuming fear

[ahsterism]

anyway now that mak has gotten to this point ( while i was ASLEEP!!!! ) i just need to point out how funny it was that i saw THIS

and it inflicted me with enough brainwroms to go "you know what? i'm gonna write the other version of him where he's miserable. and also relisten to the entire podcast"

#yes this was the catalyst. who is surprised #i mean i don't believe for one second that everything is good for them in protocol that scene was sus as FUCK #something is deeply wrong i can sense it #but oh my god..... oh h hh my go d #EL WIWI........................... #i will write protocol gerry too btw just. you know. we know nothing HJDFSBSKNFD #✧ ooc

[ahsterism]

i need to talk more about how i am convinced makoto was treated as essentially a figurehead for the future foundation.. he's a symbol and that symbolic influence that he holds is not tangible and the lack of autonomy that comes with being viewed as a savior and how much that fucks with your perception of vulnerability and how it's no wonder he feels as if he needs to put up this mask of perfection while encouraging others to unload their pain and grief an-

#i am thinking about him again #i will continue to not talk about it more because my brain is mush but on GOD im thinking about him #see my tag about wanting to study him under a microscope #also WHY DOES THIS SAY IT HAS TEN NOTES #✧ makoto naegi. headcanons / and i found hope in a heart attack

[ahsterism]

6’2 and standing at the front of the crowd is crazy. you already have an advantage just by being alive brother. blocking out all the sunlight. life on the forest floor, withering away

#✧ ryouki kure. musings / guess i better wash my mouth out with soap #him energy idk #✧ queue

[ahsterism]

He should have been having an anxiety attack behind the club

#✧ saburo fuse. musings / the wires got the best of him #✧ queue