alwaysahogwartshufflepuff

[alwaysahogwartshufflepuff]

If you think quidditch players weren’t superstitious, your wrong, and if you think James wasn’t the worst outta the lot of them, you’ve got another thing coming.

[alwaysahogwartshufflepuff]

James and Sirius hang mistletoes at every doorway/entrance, so they have an excuse to kiss Regulus and Remus.

Regulus asks Remus to help him set the table while James and Sirius play with Harry.

As Regulus comes out of the kitchen, Remus runs into him at the entrance

Regulus:

Remus:

Sirius:

James:

Sirius: We didn't think this through

James: No, we did not

Harry: Kiss!

Remus gives Regulus a peck on the forehead

[alwaysahogwartshufflepuff]

“the marauders got the teenage years the golden trio couldn’t and the golden trio got the adulthood the marauders couldn’t get”

STFU😭😭😭😭

[alwaysahogwartshufflepuff]

Sunday’s trip with Severus, Minerva and little Harry

[alwaysahogwartshufflepuff]

Drunk James: I like hot guys, and girls. Mostly hot guys. Mostly Regulus.

Peter: I want my galleons Moony

Remus: fuck

Sirius: what

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Noah: Will is my baby <3

Finn: Mike is an idiot <3

[alwaysahogwartshufflepuff]

james: okay guys i'm tired of all these negative feelings, let's all say something we like about ourselves

sirius: fine, i like my hair

peter: i like... chess?

remus: i like sirius

james: that's not what-

sirius: i'd like to change my answer, i like moony as well

marlene: i like james's mom

pandora: i like my shoes!

evan: i like james's mom too

james: can you leave my mom out of this conversation?

barty: he's right guys, it's inappropriate

james: thank you barty

barty: let's talk about how fine his father is

james: ...

dorcas: i like girls in quidditch robes

peter: what's happening here?

regulus: i don't like anything

james: LISTEN HERE, YOU ARE A BEAUTIFUL HUMAN BEING AND I LOVE YOU, THE WORLD IS A BETTER PLACE JUST BECAUSE YOU EXIST AND THERE'S NOTHING I WOULDN'T DO FOR YOU BECAUSE YOU DESERVE EVERYTH-

remus: do you realize this is how this whole thing started five minutes ago right?

james: i- what are you talking about?

*five minutes earlier*

james: i can't believe your parents used to starve you, they are the worst parents in the world

sirius: yeah, luckily me and reg are nothing like them

james: you're right, you have so much to be proud of

regulus: i don't like anything about myself

james: LISTEN HERE, YOU ARE A BEAUTIFUL HUMAN BEING AND I LOVE YOU, THE WORLD IS A BETTER PLACE JUST BECAUSE YOU EXIST AND THERE'S NOTHING I WOULDN'T DO FOR YOU BECAUSE YOU DESERVE EVERYTHING

[alwaysahogwartshufflepuff]

Regulus: *cooing at baby Harry and giving him all his attention*

James: *disgruntled noises*

Regulus: If you have a baby you can’t be the baby.

[alwaysahogwartshufflepuff]

Lily: why do you want to be a prefect anyways?

Remus: private bathroom

Lily: really?

Remus: I have shared a bathroom with Sirius, James, and Peter for the last 4 years.

Remus: I dream about showering in peace

[alwaysahogwartshufflepuff]

Harry: Yeah and this is my girlfriend, Ginny

Sirius: Isn’t she Ron’s little sister?

Harry: Yeah but-

Sirius: Youre dating your best friend little sibling? WHAT IS IT WITH YOU POTTERS?! YOU ARE JUST LIKE YOUR FATHER HARRY GODDAMNIT

Harry: What?

Sirius: *Staring up at the sky* ARE YOU HAPPY NOW JAMES? HES TAKING AFTER YOU! YOU LITTLE BROTHERFUCKER!

[alwaysahogwartshufflepuff]

Sirius: you cant date my brother.

James: can I date your cousin then?

Sirius: um... sure?

James, turning to Reg: great! He approves!

Regulus, holding back laughter: that's not funny.

[alwaysahogwartshufflepuff]

you’re trying to tell me that Regulus discovers his boyfriend and brother are the youngest ever animagi.

and he? what?

accepts it?

no. he’s a petty motherfucker.

the day afterwards he would begin the process, and not speak to any of them. which is very much a him thing to do, communicating only through notes for a month out of anger.

except when they all decide this is enough, and corner him

he just smiles and transforms into a black cat before their eyes.

[alwaysahogwartshufflepuff]

[ sirius and regulus are walking side by side ]

regulus : as a loyal person to family traditions, i'm sleeping with your brother.

sirius : *smacks regulus at the back of his head*

[alwaysahogwartshufflepuff]

James: -so yeah we’re moving near the deepest lake in the UK! Regulus and I in the manor and Sirius and Remus is the cottage!

Sirius: IM GOING TO LIVE WITH MOONYYY

Lily: So you two.

James and Sirius: mhm

Lily: Are moving near the deepest body of water in all of the UK

James and Sirius: *nodding vigorously*

Lily: with the two most suicidal and anger issued people we know.

James:

Sirius:

Lily:

James: *deflating* they’re going to either drown themselves or—

Sirius:*visibly shaking*…drown us?

[alwaysahogwartshufflepuff]

Remus: What’ve you got on chapter 12 so far?

Regulus: *draping his entire body across James to get a closer look at Remus’ notes* Clearly not enough-see? Your notes are so much more detailed than mine!

Remus, the dastardly brains behind this plan: Where’s your quill? I can edit yours while James copies mine down. D’you have any extra ink, Prongs?

James, on his third sexuality crisis this week: Yeah, it’s under me- my bed. If you get me off- no! if you get off me I can- I think it’s-

Regulus, maintaining eye contact with a fuming Sirius: Oh! I’ve got some in my bag actually. Maybe next time, though, thanks Potter ;)

[alwaysahogwartshufflepuff]

James: Oh we couldn’t do that…it’s on a Saturday and Remus won’t be there

Lily: but it’s just one prank—

Sirius: but Remus won’t be there

Mary: Gentlemen it’s a one time thing-

Peter: inconCIEVABLE

Marlene: ITS A MUTUALLY BENEFICIAL PRANK THAT WILL ULTIMATELY-

James, Sirius & Peter: BUT REMUS WOULDNT BE THERE

[alwaysahogwartshufflepuff]

Regulus: *sleeping*

Peter: ..... what's that thing he's holding onto?

Sirius: Oh that's just his emotional support knife for when he sleeps

Peter: His what?!?!?

James: Don't worry, he always sleeps with the knife sleeve on so he's safe.

Peter: ......ooookay then *both concerned and terrified*