anawkwardshit - Tumblr blog

anawkwardshit · 4 months

Text

Always watching.

(Ya’ wanna see something spooky?)

0 notes

anawkwardshit · 5 months

Text

Check out the bloopers video for a speech project we had to do a couple years ago, starring Kristin (@mydisplayoflite)!

youtube

#youtube #bloopers #funny #video #editing #subtitles #cussing #language #humor #speech #school #college #education #jokes #twins #sisters #siblings #Youtube

0 notes

anawkwardshit · 10 months

Text

@doce12 made fan art for chapter 1 of my book, “this world we have built is burning down around us”! It is so cool, and I am so excited! I don’t get fan art a lot, so this is something I always love to see!

this world we have built is burning down around us - CHAPTER [Archive of Our Own] by @anawkwardshit

This scene is from chapter one of a fic i decided to reread again🤯its been on haitus for a while tho so beware 🧟

#dsmp art #dsmp fanart #ao3 fic #tommyinnit #tubbo underscore #dsmp fanfic #books #dmsp #dream smp #a03 #technoblade

21 notes · View notes

anawkwardshit · 1 year

Text

I don’t know why I found this so funny? Like, just imagine when they go to process the claims, and this is just the evaluation. The obvious correlation but no outright mention of it is just ironically hilarious to me.

#funny #Walmart #claims #job #work shenanigans #humor #memes #ogp #online grocery shopping #odp #department #walmart plus #meme

6 notes · View notes

anawkwardshit · 2 years

Text

Feel free to check out my rants for further information on my views on the Dream SMP lore and characters:

Tubbo Needs To Step Up and Get His Shit Together

Tommy, Dream, and the Addiction of Predictability

Doomsday and Injustice

Why Tommy Didn’t Get A Villain Arc

Defending C!Tommy

Tommy and Attachment Issues

Exile, Excuses, and The Truth of the Matter

Memento: Tommy’s Speech to Foolish and Why It’s Important

C!Dream Character Analysis

Las Nevadas Needle and Exile Tower Comparison

Tubbo and Tommy Song/Animatic Idea

Dream SMP non-lore related posts:

Technoblade’s Death: Initial Reaction ***

Technoblade’s Death: Why It Is So Jarring ***

L’manberg’s Memorial

Technoblade Reference IRL

Screwing W/ My Oblivious Friend by Having A Breakdown about DSMP Lore

Dream SMP Lore As Though Created by Children

22 notes · View notes

anawkwardshit · 2 years

Text

I think what makes it so hard to cope with Techno’s death is that, for me, I didn’t expect it. There was no forewarning, nothing to tell me to brace for impact—I was just shot in the chest without warning.

Yeah, he had cancer, but he was optimistic about it, said he was doing better. Whether he was lying to make us feel better or it happened to take a turn for the worst at the last second, it doesn’t change that I full heartedly believed he’d survive. I wasn’t worried for a long time, not since the initial post of his first cancer video.

Cancer is unpredictable, yes. I lost my grandma to cancer myself. And yet, for some reason, I never thought to prepare for the worst, the possibility that Techno wouldn’t make it. Because Techno dying? Techno not being here anymore? It was an unfathomable idea. He was human, that much I’m aware, but it just didn’t seem possible. He was so good and bright and made me laugh, a person I could rely on when I needed to laugh, never gone even when silent for months—so it wouldn’t happen now, right? The why, the how, it just didn’t make sense in my head, therefore I just never took the time to think on if he would die, only when he would get better.

I don’t know about anyone else, but I think that’s the most painful part of Techno’s death for me: the fact that I wasn’t prepared and the knowledge that I never would have been. My heart shattered in a second flat, and that was it. It was over.

#technoblade #technoblade never dies #rest in peace #rip #rip technoblade #tribute #tribute to Technoblade #death #sad #angst #grief #YouTube #fuck cancer #cancer #rememberance #dream smp #minecraft #chat

43 notes · View notes

anawkwardshit · 2 years

Text

Rest In Peace, Technoblade

Alex is dead. Technoblade is dead.

I do not want to discredit him by not calling him by his real name, as he should be remembered as a person before a character or YouTuber, but he only told us in death, and I do not want to use it willynilly like I am entitled simply because he is gone, even if he gave that information. Honestly, I do not know what he’d prefer, so Techno is what I will continue calling him from here on. It is the person he introduced himself as when he inspired us all, so it’s what I will continue to call him (until I know more). Calling him by his real name now is in remembrance, to acknowledge that he is a person before anything else.

It’s heartbreaking, and I bawled my fucking eyes out like a goddamned baby. Because even though I didn’t forget he had cancer, I did not bother to dwell on it. He acted like he was getting better, like everything would be okay, and I believed him. I’m not mad that he didn’t say anything, that he kept that to himself; he deserves that privacy, and I know he didn’t want to have us all mourning him before he was even gone, but the whole thing still hurts.

I’m so fucking mad, not at him, just at life and everything that meant he was the one who paid the price of some stupid disease that he couldn’t even avoid.

He was a person, but even still, the thought of him dying, it was unfathomable to me, still is. I was at a fair when he posted the cancer video, and I bawled then, too, but I thought it would be okay. He acted like it would be, and I held onto that; I’m not mad that he was being optimistic, I’m just mad that life was cruel enough, callous enough, to decide that he should die anyway.

This whole thing makes my head hurt. I’m still in some sort of shock. I have no words, I barely understand. I feel like everything is falling apart, and the thought of his friends, his family, going through this, too, just makes me cry even more. It’s so fucking dumb, Vidcon just happened, everyone was riding on the high from that, and now this devastating news—I feel like my world has collapsed around me, like reality is warped. Part of me hates that he was dying while everyone was so fucking happy and oblivious, me included in that.

I know he died before that video. The production of it, how long it likely took to put together, along with his father saying he died 8 hours after writing his final words, proves that he died before today—and none of us fucking knew.

That’s not his fault, not anybody’s fault, but knowing I was oblivious to it and now suffering through grief over it when I wouldn’t have been had there never been a video, makes me hurt so much. I feel selfish, and knowing that doesn’t stop the hurt either.

Part of me still kind of expects him to rise from the dead or some stupid shit, like this isn’t reality, and reality is shit, like this is some stupid ‘Angst with a happy ending’ fic. I hate that. I hate it. He’s gone, and I’m still grappling with it.

He worked so hard to create content for us, to make us laugh and entertain us, and I want that to be a reminder to people that I don’t think he’d want anyone to stop creating and being inspired by him simply because he is gone now.

After all, Technoblade never dies.

Rest In Peace, Alex, Technoblade. I promise you are missed.

#technoblade #rip Technoblade #rest in peace #technoblade never dies #long live the king #blood god #mcyt #youtube #cancer #death #dream smp #rememberance #grief #minecraft #rip

28 notes · View notes

anawkwardshit · 2 years

Text

I wonder if Wilbur connected Tommy’s episode at Las Nevadas’s Needle, where he mentioned jumping off, with his suicide attempt at Logstedshire, or if he had forgotten about it because of his previous denial that anything was wrong.

21 notes · View notes

anawkwardshit · 2 years

Text

But, hear me out: c!Tommy and c!Tubbo with the song “Younger Dreams” by Our Last Night

3 notes · View notes

anawkwardshit · 2 years

Text

Another Day At Work: A Dramatic Retelling

“You have an empty tote,” my sister says to me, who is pulling a dolly with full totes behind it, before she is about to head out onto the sales floor.

“I know,” I say, quietly, throat sore and seconds from choking; one slip up, and I’m on the floor.

She nods. “I’m just saying ‘cause you seem out of it.” Without another word, she walks away.

I do not see this, my back already turned as I pick up the aforementioned empty tote to pile it into one of the half stacks on the pallets beneath a steel shelving unit before I head out of the dispense door. “I am—” My voice betrays me, its scratchy soreness, the risk of it dragging me into a painful coughing fit, cutting off the relatively normal volume until the rest of the words are only a whisper, “in it to win it.”

I turn, eyes half-lidded and fluttering, and stand from beneath the shelf. With no warning, I slam my head into the steel grate above me, the pain mocking and cruel. Part of me wants to cry.

My sister is gone, and I am, indeed, as she had predicted, out of it.

I leave, then, dolly dragging at my heels, an upset lump in my throat, the upset that of a child.

It seems I am not in it to win it.

#humor #work #walmart #shenanigans #work shenanigans #back rooms #the backrooms #sibling things #funny #story telling #true story #storytelling #sickness #illness #dramatic #drama #prompt

0 notes

anawkwardshit · 2 years

Text

Another offshoot in my series “wade in the flames of time burning alive,” where Tommy embraces death and still ends up in the clutches of time, though he goes even further back. You don’t have to read the main story to understand this, though there are a few references to it here and there (so if you’ve read the main (named below), maybe you caught them). This used to be a two-shot, but I made it a three shot due to the recent news with Techno (had to extend the time I am taking to write the rest). The first two parts are up, over 20,000 words currently, so enjoy and be mindful of the tags!

For those who aren’t aware, this is a smaller piece connected to the main book in the series “this world we have built is burning down around us”, so check that out when you have the chance! It’s Tommy-centric with SBI, crimeboys, bedrock bros, and time travel!

3 notes · View notes

anawkwardshit · 2 years

Text

Commitment and What It Means For a Healthy Relationship

My friend and I talked about romantic relationships, and it got brought up that I don’t think they’re for me. He wondered why I would think that, and I explained that I think I would be toxic without intention. He thought I was expecting too much from myself when I explained why, and that someone out there would accept me the way I am, but I still don’t think he understands it.

Here’s essentially what I told him:

I have no time to commit to a relationship, much less have any desire to promise a commitment. All my commitment, admittedly, goes to my books and work, and everything else is second priority.

I think my significant other would get bothered when I don’t bother to respond at least once a week (which I do to my friend all the time, in which the silence can often last months). To be honest, ignoring someone you’re dating for a whole month (on average) is fucked (and sometimes the only response after a month is, “Sorry, I was busy”).

And that dynamic wouldn’t always change when it comes to existing together in reality, not just over the phone. I’d be like, “I don’t feel like talking” or “I’m busy right now” all the time simply because I don’t want to talk, and eventually it barely becomes a relationship at all.

There are things in a romantic relationship that are needed to be functional and healthy: communication, even if it’s just talking about your day in general (at least once a week), along with making sure any fights don’t escalate into something beyond reasonable (which would be difficult since all I know how to resolve things is how I fight with my sister, which I’ve already acknowledged wouldn’t be healthy with others even if it works for my sister and I); making time to do things with the other, even if you have to plan ahead of time and wait a while to get that time and do things the other likes (which I hate doing, since going out period and not doing anything I don’t want to do only bores me and makes me inattentive); commitment that involves caring about that person’s personal life and problems, as well as being there for them through it (which is also hard, since I struggle with sympathy/empathy and can be unintentionally apathetic to situations that call for gentler handling, and trying to help feels awkward and insincere when I don’t feel like I can empathize or that I actually understand or care, as cruel as that may sound).

Even without meaning to, I’d probably be a toxic partner for a lot of people (thank god for my being self aware at the very least), especially depending on the needs some people have to have met. I lack in a lot of the departments that I personally think needs to be implemented in a healthy relationship, even if every relationship is different and needs those things at different levels and amounts.

He implied that “commitment” just means promising not to date other people (cheating, essentially), but I think that’s a very bare and poor example of “commitment,” as I’ve explained above, especially when it comes to relationships (romantic and platonic both). In the end, I simply told him that, point blank, I don’t think dating is for me.

Feel free to give me your opinion in the comments! I’d honestly like to know what others think!

2 notes · View notes

anawkwardshit · 2 years

Text

C!Dream Character Analysis:

Reminder: this is essentially just my interpretation of Dream’s character (of which there are many) from what facts I know about his intentions and thoughts; we’ve never gotten a full breakdown from Dream about his character or any streams that show his character’s perspective.

In my personal opinion, since Dream’s overall perspective, motivation, and goals are vague and mostly just pieced-together headcanons from what we manage to glean from his character, I think I like the idea that Dream has just decided to speedrun his way to his goal, resulting in an unhealthy method that not only hurts others but also ended up destroying himself.

When I say this, I mean that Dream’s main problem is the way he’s gone about keeping everyone together. At first it was trying to stop L’manberg from starting, so that countries and factions, etc, wouldn’t be formed to separate people (and it still did, leading to other countries and factions, which is what Dream was trying to avoid). Because he failed, he essentially spiraled into this mindset that he needs to control everything in order for everything to be set properly. If he wants everyone together, he needs to manipulate them into being where he wants them.

Tommy’s character was resistant to his threats and attempts at getting people to do what he said, and in order to try and circumvent that, he tried to break Tommy down so he would comply, as well (we all know how that turned out). In the process, he also ended up becoming obsessed with Tommy, since he realized that his childish ways and ability to argue even without a logical point was somehow the way the blond managed to get people to rally around him; Dream realized Tommy was an important part of keeping the server in check, so not only did he try to break him, but he also tried to get him under his control, effectively attempting to make Tommy into a figure that he could control and, with him, control others (which he almost succeeded in).

In conclusion, Dream has come to the idea that he needs to have absolute control over everything and everyone (explaining why he’s so manipulative and making him a general overall control freak) in order to have things go smoothly. To him, letting everyone do what they want has just led to conflict and dissonance, and his solution to keep everyone together and fix it is to have a single person—himself—control who does what and how things happen. Free will means there will be conflicts of interest, and Dream doesn’t like that (again, he wants everyone to be one big, happy family).

Unfortunately, Dream’s character has spiraled so much that he seems to miss that his logic is incredibly flawed, and now he’s mostly just obsessed over the matter of keeping every one of his pawns in the places he needs them, meaning he’s kind of lost his “big happy family” vision in his own psychotic breakdown. It also explains his God complex, in which he’s deluding himself into thinking he’s able to control everyone and make them dance to his tune as he’s always wanted.

(See my pinned post for links to my other rants about the Dream SMP, L’manberg, and Tommy’s character.)

17 notes · View notes

anawkwardshit · 2 years

Text

Tommy and Attachment Issues

In Tommy’s stream with Phil where he tried to show c!Tommy that objects aren’t people, and they aren’t worth the sacrifice, I find people’s complaint of how c!Phil handled it validating and somewhat amusing.

We all know Phil explained that the entire premise of burning c!Tommy’s gapple was Tommy’s idea, but I still find the dynamic interesting in terms of not only c!Phil disregarding c!Tommy’s trauma, but also the relationship c!Tommy has with his possessions, his items.

Items are, fundamentally, the only thing that stays. C!Wilbur abandoned him, c!Techno betrayed him, c!Phil left him, c!Tubbo exiled him and then got married and had a kid right when c!Tommy died, c!Sam is the one who let it happen, c!Niki and c!Jack have tried to kill him multiple times (and hate him in c!Jack’s case), and c!Bad and c!Ant and the entire Eggpire want c!Tommy dead and out of the way; everyone besides maybe c!Puffy has abandoned and/or hurt c!Tommy in some way. Realistically, c!Dream was the only one who stayed, and he abused him, something that took c!Tommy a long time to come to terms with.

(Make note that while c!Dream stayed, he also never allowed c!Tommy to keep any of his items. And eventually, c!Tommy became willing to let c!Dream blow up his stuff, eager to do it as “bonding” and then hang out. Interesting parallel, isn’t it?)

C!Phil’s idea of attachment to objects is, at its core, true, and there is value in it, but I honestly think it’s a little callous to try to explain that people are more important to someone who has never had people really care about him without conditions or expectations, or at least show that they do very well (specifically in c!Tubbo’s case, kid’s repressed trauma has a lasting impact on emotional stability and beyond).

Despite this, c!Tommy has still given up the discs time and time again for the sake of people (L’manberg at the Green Festival, then c!Tubbo at the showdown in c!Dream’s base). Tommy’s character has this idea in his head that nobody gives a shit about him, and yet he still sacrifices for those same people all the time.

46 notes · View notes

anawkwardshit · 2 years

Text

I’ve probably talked about it before in my other rants, but I find it funny that people still say that c!Tommy brought exile upon himself, even if they also agree that what happened there wasn’t deserved. Not only, as I’ve said previously, do we know that everyone else has done the equivalent of or worse than accidentally burn a few blocks of someone’s house and gotten away scott free, but c!Dream was just looking for an excuse to take c!Tommy away and isolate him. Hell, during the trial, c!Dream was reinforcing his point by blaming other property damage in the SMP on c!Tommy, but in actuality that damage was done by c!Dream himself (some even by c!Puffy).

Even after exile, when c!Tommy was with c!Technoblade, c!Dream destroyed the Community House and placed the blame on c!Tommy so that the others would turn on him and allow c!Dream to obtain the discs and, likely, c!Tommy himself, where they’d put him back in exile and c!Dream could have control over him again.

Exile wasn’t a punishment, it was an abduction (implied in the way c!Tommy wasn’t allowed in L’manberg or the SMP, but somehow he wasn’t allowed out of Logstedshire either). It would’ve happened one way or another; it just so happens that the incident with George’s house was the perfect opportunity, and c!Dream took it.

45 notes · View notes

anawkwardshit · 2 years

Text

https://youtu.be/vgO-f8a-vTk

youtube

For context, watch this animatic. It centers around a speech of Tommy’s after Wilbur’s revival, and it’s a masterpiece.

Here’s my take (opinion) on it:

This speech is one of my all-time favorites of Tommy’s. What I think I love the most about this speech is that it really reflects not only how Tommy sees Wilbur and everything that went down but also displays more clearly who he truly is inside to others. Tommy’s had plenty to say before, and he’s said it, but sometimes his childish manner of speaking and difficulty with communicating has caused the meaningful things he HAS said before to become lost in translation, making not only other characters in the story brush Tommy off or wrongly perceive something he’s said, but also the viewers themselves to miss the deeper meaning behind Tommy’s usual speech patterns and brash attitude.

This speech is one of the rare times Tommy is effectively communicating his thoughts with someone as well as revealing a side to him he doesn’t often bare to people. He’s not yelling or rambling or speaking in a manner that is barely understandable to those who has no prior knowledge to what he’s referring to; he’s quiet and calm and speaking with his heart instead of his mouth. Despite his usual demeanor and being a child, viewers and characters alike forget that Tommy fought in wars and went through stuff most adults don’t ever experience. He carries a lot of wisdom and kindness that many miss because they only see what’s on the surface, what Tommy lets people see.

And, in the end, despite the very different mannerism in which Tommy delivers this speech, it’s still very clearly Tommy, showed most pointedly when Tommy says, “Thanks, I guess. Maybe there’s more to you, too.” He does this with a tone of someone not only unused to genuinely taking compliments but as a person awkwardly (and somewhat reluctantly) trying to give a positive response back but just ending up sounding petulant and sarcastic (a very Tommy vibe👌).

(See my pinned post for links to my other rants about the Dream SMP, L’manberg, and Tommy’s character.)

49 notes · View notes

anawkwardshit · 2 years

Text

Defending C!Tommy

I would like to preface this by saying that much of this rant consists of pasted pieces from my previous Dream SMP posts, so be aware of that. I would also like to mention that I base many of my ideas off of not just lore but also introspection into the less detailed pieces of lore or the realities that come with stuff that happens in the lore even if not explicitly mentioned in canon (i.e. Tommy’s PTSD from being a child soldier and his other trauma).

Before we begin, keep in mind that Tommy had to suffer through multiple wars, deal with his brother who was suffering from a manic down spiral and another sibling/friend (depending on what you take as canon) who killed his best friend in front of him and then fought him to the death in a pit. He then proceeded to watch his father/father figure (whatever you take as canon, since Wilbur and Phil have submitted different versions, though Tommy has admitted to Phil being a father figure to him regardless) kill his brother after being witness to the entire nation he’d built, bled, and fought for be blown up, and mere seconds later had his other brother/friend (Techno) turn on him and attempt to kill him and the rest of his friends with massive beings of death and destruction. That’s gonna instill some PTSD.

Let’s address what we can accuse Tommy for, starting with the reason for his exile. Why excuse Tommy burning down George’s house and breaking rules? Easy: Tommy didn’t do anything more than what others have, and nobody else ever received punishment for it. People have repeatedly stolen from each other and griefed without repercussions, let alone one as harsh as exile and the isolation and abuse that came from it. Hell, Tommy’s house has been griefed and stolen from multiple times without anyone batting an eye or bothering to defend him (Connor even moved in and claimed it as his own later without permission, essentially kicking Tommy out with little to no remorse). Next to that, the burning of George’s house was a complete accident to begin with; the stealing was just supposed to be a prank, a harmless one. Don’t forget that Ranboo was involved, something he later admitted, and was never punished for it. This basically proves that Tommy’s exile wasn’t a punishment or justice, it was just Dream using it as an excuse to hurt him. In fact, Dream’s argument during the trial that Tommy has continued his destruction across the SMP and continues to be a danger and destroy the peace is false, since it was Dream and even Puffy who were the ones to blow up the other builds (meaning Dream is not doing this out of any professional/political lens, he’s just framing Tommy for his own self gain).

When it comes to Jack, I have multiple arguments I could make. Tommy’s mindset when it comes to pain is skewed (read the section in this comment about Fundy’s torture and Connor’s hostage situation to get a more in-depth detail about how it’s skewed). Hell, this happened during the exile, where Tommy considered Dream a good friend, and the man had been the one to take away his first two lives; for all it’s worth in Tommy’s mind, what’s a little killing between friends? In other scenarios, Tommy didn’t even intend to hurt or kill Jack. He got startled, rightly so as he was not only being abused and constantly nervous when Dream would show up but also suicidal and lost to a relatively consistent state of disassociation. I’m not saying he doesn’t owe the man an apology, but Tommy likely doesn’t even realize the wrongs of what he did; pain and death to him is so normalized that it likely doesn’t even register (like with Dream being his friend and killing him before, even Phil killing Wilbur (assisted suicide) and still claiming to love him). And even if we ignore all that, we’re all aware of the hallucinations Tommy experienced in exile, not to mention Dream’s gaslighting. He saw Tubbo everywhere, talked to an imaginary figure he called Clara and a girlfriend he built out of wood like they were real, and Dream even managed to gaslight him into thinking that MD (Mexican Dream) died of an overdose even after he killed him right in front of Tommy as the boy watched. For all Tommy was aware with his state of mind, Jack very well could have been another person/situation his mind created in an attempt to combat the isolation and loneliness.

One can also argue that Tommy messed up siding with Techno, the enemy of L’manberg. But what else was there for Tommy to do? He was running from his abuser, his friends had turned their backs on him for all he was aware—he was forced to fend for himself, even if that resorted to stealing, and he took the companionship and help where he could. Techno gave that to him.

If we were to address Tommy’s betrayal of Techno himself at the Green Festival, I would argue that it wasn’t truly betrayal at all. Techno literally offered to give Tommy to Dream for the favor while Tommy was right there next to him (how was Tommy supposed to trust him after that?), continued to insist their relationship was only a business transaction until the very end where he admitted that maybe he “might” consider Tommy something of a friend, only let Tommy stay with him and hide as long as Tommy was useful to him in his own goals (ergo, they used each other, and his insisting that Tommy only treated him like a weapon was a hypocritical argument to make when he didn’t treat Tommy much differently from a tool; he could at least respect the fact that they used each other equally), and while Techno insists he made his intentions clear from the start, that is untrue—Tommy’s the one who made his intentions clear, saying he didn’t want to blow up or hurt L’manberg, and Techno simply brushed that aside and insisted they’d talk about that later (Tommy only agreed to “minor terrorism” which we see he doesn’t back out on when he lets Techno spawn a Wither, take Connor hostage, etc). He even deleted the “Destroy L’manberg” item on the To-Do List before giving it to Tommy to look at, intentionally deceiving him of his intentions. He teamed up with Tommy’s abuser after even seeing the effect he’d had on Tommy after exile and then calling what Tommy did “betrayal” even though it could be more realistically considered a conflict of interests.

Let’s also talk about the “torture” of Fundy when he and Techno infiltrated L’manberg and the taking Connor hostage. Tommy was going along with what Techno wanted to do, for the most part. He was trying to prove he was useful and worthy of the refuge and companionship Techno offered. Remember, even after escaping Dream, Tommy was still struggling to recognize the abuse he’d endured (when he ran from the Final Control Room in the sewers, he was asking for Dream, his “friend”, to help him). Tommy still had yet to recognize that the hurt he’d suffered wasn’t justified. To him, torturing Fundy for information probably didn’t even register in his head as malicious. He wasn’t hurting Fundy just to hurt him, he was doing it for the good of his discs and L’manberg (as Tommy said). The pain he’d brought Fundy was a means to an end for him, and since a lot of the hurt Tommy has been through, not only by Dream, has been the same kind of pain, pain brought to further others’ goals and even teach “lessons”, it likely didn’t register in his head as wrong. I’m not saying Tommy doesn’t have to apologize, but it’s not as though the kid did it for the sole enjoyment of inflicting pain; his mindset was skewed due to his own experiences. In this instance, Connor’s situation is similar. They took him hostage to negotiate and further their own goals; I don’t think they even really hurt Connor. Hell, Tommy himself has been used by Wilbur, Techno, Dream, and probably others I can’t recall in the same manner, even in similarity that they didn’t inflict physical pain onto him either. Again, we’re back to Tommy not recognizing the mental stress and hurt he’s inflicting on people because he doesn’t register it; it’s normal to him, something he himself has been subjected to and then been told to suck it up.

In all honesty, I believe a lot of the stuff Tommy does that makes some people find it hard to sympathize with him is an attempt that Tommy makes to relax and have fun like he’s always done before everything went to crap (before the wars and betrayal and hate). Tommy’s character is naturally an angry kid (another reason why some dislike him), possibly a partial effect from growing up in the midst of fighting and war, or even an effect of his trauma and PTSD (mental health isn’t always pretty or as romanticized as people like to make it out to be). He’s all for a good spat and scuffle, but that’s familiar and lighthearted; he’s as tired of all the bloodshed and war just like anyone else is. He always seems to be raring for a fight, but like with his idea to fight Dream instead of taking punishment, he’s nowhere near willing to lose his home again, making fighting reasonable. When Sam Nook asked him to destroy the Egg, Tommy decided not to in fear of starting another war since it wasn’t really hurting anything at the time. Beyond that, Tommy’s character knows very little beyond fighting and violence; it’s the most familiar to him. Coping with peacetimes must be such a hard thing for him to grasp as a child soldier. Dealing with that and his recent grief over Wilbur through some harmless theft (no worse than what anybody else does) shouldn’t have gotten him so harshly punished, if punished at all.

37 notes · View notes