aroperyton

[aroperyton]

Sometimes when ppl r first introduced to concepts like aromantic or loveless or aplatonic etc they respond with “thats so sad” but really whats sad is when u try to force yourself to feel something that u just aren’t able to feel, and finding the label that frees you from those expectations is super liberating and not sad at all

[aroperyton]

i dont find arospec stuff limiting but i find the aro community or at least the ideas in it limiting and like i have no stretching room to be and express how my own aromanticism is and shows itself and i really fucking wish i could make it work i really fucking do but after headbutting into wall after wall after wall of being utterly unable to or trying and failing to relate to other aro ppl here i'm coming to the conclusion that i should just drop it and flesh out aromanticism for myself and what it means to me instead of trying to shove myself into "i've undoubtably never experienced romantic attraction in my life, i hate romance, and i don't get anything out of the word love", which hurts considering the entire point of me being here was that i wanted to find other people like me to help put my feelings into words, but i don't think the occasional 'oh hey that kinda fits me' outweighs the feeling like anyone who has anything to do with love or affection or anything is enforcing and normalizing amatonormative shit Inside the aro community and that lov3less aromantic-ness is the Purest form of aromanticism and everything else is diluted or missing the point or taking away from our goal and what non-lov3less arospecs have to say isn't valuable because "romance isn't what makes you human" is our one goal or the only helpful one or just cause this goal exists means we cant try and achieve other ones at the same time and so non-lov3less arospecs expressing their aromanticism in their own ways is Dangerous and Gives The Wrong Idea or even Encourages The Wrong Ideas so has to be shoved in the corners and have a million hundred thousand disclaimers and apologies plastered on it and hidden away and!!! I JUST WANNA SAY I LOVE LOTS OF THINGS AND TO HEAVILY INDULGE IN NON-ROMANTIC AFFECTION AND RELATIONSHIPS AND AESTHETICS WITHOUT BOTH AROS AND ALLOS ASSUMING I MUST JUST SECRETLY WANT ROMANCE AND AM HURTING MYSELF+OTHERS BY NOT REJECTING AFFECTION ALTOGETHER OR BY EMBRACING ROMANCE FULLY AND BE ALIENATED AND DEMONIZED BY BOTH AUUUUUUUGH ITS ALL SO FRUSTRATINGGGGGGGG AND DISHEARTENINGGGGGGG

#ranting.txt #was that my tag? blah #personal #im gonna explode if i have to think abt this anymore bye #im still aro and am still technically a part of the aro community on account of I Am The Aros but just #i dont wanna bother with all This Shit -points at above post- and i dont think i need to be knee deep in fucking #ALL THIS SHIT LOL to look up terms that help me or think about how dumb the idea that #after a certain point all love becomes romantic is OR LIKE. MRMGRHGFHGFG ITS JUST SO!! I CANT DO SHIT HERE LOL

[aroperyton]

arospec ppl who just call themselves aro? radiant i absolutely love your energy <3 /p /pos

[aroperyton]

thank you aroallos for existing. i feel so safe around you, especially as an aroace. i may not relate to you on the level of sexual attraction, but when you talk about such things, i feel warm. and happy. i know i’ll never understand what it’s actually like but i enjoy hearing other queer people’s experiences, so when you talk about your own, i feel safe. safer than when anyone else talks about sexual attraction, more comfortable. idk what this post is supposed to do just, thank you. and i love you.

[aroperyton]

i don’t see a lot of positivity posts for us, so:

shoutout to romance-positive aromantic and arospec people! shoutout to aros who like reading cheesy romantic stuff, to aros who like valentines and lovey dovey stuff, and aroswho like shipping whether its queerplatonic or romantic! i hope you are having a wonderful day, that your holidays are kind and warm, and that you get to hit an aphobe over the head with a spiked mallet or axe/axe-adjacent and get paypaled six hundred dollars for doing so!

[aroperyton]

hey psst guess what

aroallos arent predatory

aroallos arent nsfw or 18+

aroallos arent weird or abnormal

aroallos arent hurting anyone

aroallos arent less valuable than alloaces, alloallos, or aroaces

aroallos are deserving of respect and love (if they want it)

[aroperyton]

No but allos who think we're weird for describing our experiences with different terms and labels are actually the weird ones. Romance is also a term that exists for people to talk about their shared set of experiences. Crushes, dates, romantic relationships, all of these have a name because people feel the need to describe how they feel and what they want. But when we create our own terms, they think they're stupid, unnecessary and wrong. Well, for me personally, the terms romance, crushes, dates and romantic relationships are not very useful and they make me confused too. But I won't tell you that, because I know your feelings and needs are real and I'd fully respect you for using any of those terms. My point is, terms and labels that other people use don't need to make sense to you in order to be respected. They exist for the same reason the terms that you use exist, to help us understand ourselves and talk about those experiences with others.

[aroperyton]

person who’s thinks relationships are only ever friendships or romantic, finding out about qprs: hmmmmm… getting a lot of “friendship” vibes from this… no… actually… getting a lot of “romantic” vibes from this… no… actually…

[aroperyton]

Friend Reminder that Aro-spec is in fact just that. A Spectrum. Some of us do feel small bits of romantic attraction. Some of us fall in love (platonic, alterous or romantically). Some of us are repulsed by the idea of romance. Some of us will never be in a "romantic" or queer platonic relationship. Some of us enjoy the thought of getting married. Some of us are indifferent. Some of us are fine with just having sexual relationships. Some of us worry about other things. But we are all on this big green spectrum of aromantic.

[aroperyton]

i remember SOME time ago saying smth like when i was a tween it was starting to set in that people were joking or playing around when it came to romance and it was like a Teehee Girl Gossip Teasing thing but then i got older and people didn't let it go and i was like uh oh, but i don't thhhhhhhink it was like that? if you remember your internal emotional landscape at 12 years old and the reason for everything there fuck you but like

i think it was when i was a tween i was like hm well everyone says dating is good and i havent done that so how could i know, APPARENTALLY right inbetween my first and second relationship i was starting to question being aro but i thought i was just Confused and Misguided and this next person would Fix me, but that relationship ended and i felt nothing and i was like uh oh everyone's still talking about how great relationships are still i have to live up to this, i rushed ? was rushed? into another relationship a while later and like 2 months into THAT i felt nothing and i was like . UH OH ! I THINK THIS MIGHT MEAN SOMETHING AND THAT SOMETHING IS THERE IS NOTHING !

it just kinda sucks to grow up and have your sexuality be so There and in-your-face but have nobody relate to you or be able to put what you're experiencing into words and everyone going on doing what makes them happy and is honestly the Point of ANY social thing for them more often than not is just so disjointed and hollow and forced for you and you can't "keep up", and you have no idea what to compare it to you just know that it's Not There, so your only conclusion is that it's Not There, so your next conclusion is it HAS to be there somewhere cause you can't just Not Have something, but then it's not there!!!!!!!! i'm actually pretty lucky cause there was only about a year's gap between me starting to suspect 'hm, there is probably something going on here' and 'i'm greyro?!!! i think?!??!!!!' but like, man. it feels like i had a year taken away from me being more okay with myself and not trying to pry myself into boxes that'd never fit when something as simple as 'knowing an arospec person or even just following an arospec person online' couldve solved it.

#rambling.txt #personal #wah :( #i'm NOT saying these are on the same levels of like how much of an issue these are but the treatment of arospecness #as Lack and only Lack and Under All Your Absurd Determination To Be Incorrect Is My REAL Beloved Friend/Child/Etc; i swear!! #reminds me a lot of how ppl feel about autism; all they see is 'why aren't you doing this' #and their IDEA of you as an allistic/allo is Acting in this Weird Way just to confuse you or be rebellious etc etc etc #and Oh Haha you just dont Get It here here's what youre supposed to do!!! #and when you still dont do that thing comfortably and it's NOT natural for you and there IS no allist or allo under #all this Weird Behavior then the only thing they see is lack and they can't imagine how you can be happy #when you so fundamentally arent like them; BUT LIKE. #WHILE LACK IS A /PART/ OF IT THERE IS SO MUCH HERE OMG AND THEY JUST CANT SEE IT CAUSE THEY ARENT US #i love stimming i love viewing relationships from a more obejective distanced ... viewpoint #and breaking them down and speculating about them i love that i can hear a lot and i love that i'm a slut #i love having some foods that i REALLY enjoy instead of a lot of foods i only kinda care about #and i love being able to be honest and comfortable about what i DO feel and what relationships i DO want #instead of lying to others and myself and only making everyone unhappy in the end #i could go on but there's a tag limit so XD you get the idea aromanticness is way more whole than people want it to be #and if you're an arospec person in someone's life thank you

[aroperyton]

AROSPEC PRIDE EMOTES

are the hearts ironic? possibly /lh

flags are Aromantic, Demiromantic, Grayromantic, AroAllo, & Non-SAM Aro!

requested by anonymous!

[aroperyton]

repeat after me:

aromantics who are in a romantic relationship are aro enough 💚.

aromantics who want a romantic relationship are aro enough 🤍.

aromantics who do not want a romantic relationship are aro enough 🖤.

[aroperyton]

I’d like to take a minute to appreciate aromantic diversity

Every single aromantic person’s experience is different. Every single aromantic person has a different constellation of reasons they took up the label, a different journey to finding it. I think it’s important to remember that, while our community as it exists today began with clusters of lonely, alienated people finding strength in their similarities, we have just as much strength in our diversity.

Our community has grown beyond a group of people with common exeriences to become a group of people with vastly varied experiences but a common need not to be constrained by social convention in the form and frequency of our relationships. That’s rad as hell.

So here’s to the many forms that takes:

aros who want romance on their own, convention-defying terms

aros who want no romance at all, ever

aros who want friendships as their primary relationships, who want their friends to be their roommates for life, who maybe even want to co-parent with their friends

aros who want nonromantic sexual relationships

aros who want nonromantic, nonsexual relationships

aros who want intimacy that defies existing categories

aros who want no intimacy at all, thank you very much

aros who want romance sometimes, maybe, it honestly depends

aros who want romantic relationships in theory but can’t stand them in practice

aros who want to call themselves aro but aren’t sure why yet, and maybe they never will be

aros who want multiple intimate relationships of some kind and identify as polyamorous or polyaffectionate or poly-something else

and all the rest of us. There are so many others. Represent yourself in a reblog or reply if you want!

And here’s to the beauty of a community that unites such diversity in mutual support and respect. We are so powerful together.

[aroperyton]

I made some gender symbols with aro flags

First and second row: Aro flags

Third row: alloaro flag (by arotaro)

forth and fifth row: queerplatonic flags

sixth row: polyaffectionate (by aromanticpolyamory)

seventh row: aro lesbian (by bunnigay, darkened version by disasterbisexual)

[aroperyton]

i think i'm greyplatonic, i think i've made posts before articulating what 'attraction' means to me and how Sometimes There Are Ppl I Get Along With And Therefore Like To Talk To But Thats Really It And Thats What I Classify as 'Friends' and the two Do Not really mesh for me blah blah blah but sometimes i'm attracted to someone but as a friend so i kinda want friends But More but not best friends ??? ??? ?? and THAT'S what i can best describe as platonic attraction, cause it's attraction, but platonic! and i have experienced this feeling a grand total of [drumroll] .... TWO times!!! which interestingly enough is the same amount of times i can for-sure say ive experienced romantic attraction, and i'm greyromantic, so XD but i think i'll still use aplatonic/apl as a ... shorthand ??? for if anyone ever is like, 'oh youre aromantic so that means youre like platonically attracted to ppl instead of romantically?? get squishes and stuff??' or other well-meaning but not super knowing things, but otherwise yeah me being greyapl/apl/aplspec (whatever i prefer to use at the moment XD) is only really relevent in the aspec community/around other aspec ppl i think, cause society at large feels pretty similar to how i do about friends and it's just aspec ppl that like to go like... 'being platonically in love with your friends and wanting to live with them etc etc instead of a romantic partner is aro culture!1!11' all the time and shit so xD

#rambling.txt #ftr i know '_ is _ culture!!' things tend to be pretty specific to the person saying it anyway #its just the very common 'platonic instead of romantic!!!' thing in here that makes me feel like me being greyapl is worth noting :P #like damnnnnn these ppl are nice and all and its good to talk to ppl but that doesnt like; make me infatuated with them #if i kiss em or live with em or some shit that's just something i'm doing not Feeling #bah anyway :P you get the idea i dont need to resay the same thing 50 diff ways to make sure my point gets across

[aroperyton]

just found out about the aplatonic label while going on a hunt for every flag that applies to me and holy SHIT is that mecore

it always kinda bothered me how everything on the aro tag seems to talk about how oh, dont worry - aro people may not feel romantic attraction, but they still have qprs/platonic love! and that just,, doesnt sit right with me, since i dont relate to that? i dont really get squishes or,,, well, strong bonds with people as a General Thing so. its nice to find a label that encompasses that :] Though I think loveless aro might be the best descriptor, since it also covers my lack of alterous or familial love?

aanyways i guess im quadruple a now.. ace, aro, apl and agender. aaaa. my identity is just Screaming, and honestly yeah that sounds about right

oh also, made a new pfp since i dont really like my old one. theres an id under the cut!

[id: an illustration of lots of eyes on a black background. the irises of each consist of a different pride flag. these flags are (from left to right) genderqueer, loveless aro, transgender, aroace, aromantic, amatopunk, they/them pronoun user, neopronouns user, asexual, agender, aplatonic, voidpunk, ae/aer pronoun user, nonamory. in the centre is a larger nonbinary eye thats looking directly at the viewer.]

#yahoo apl solidarity op :D!!! happy for u

[aroperyton]