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asgardiangurll · 2 years

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Ready or Not - Chapter 1

Story Rating: Explicit, 18+ only

Relationships: Dark!Steve Rogers/Reader

Word Count: 2,432

Warnings for Future Chapters: Non-con, dubious consent, obsession, canon divergence, additional tags to be added.

Summary: You were certain that Steve Rogers would never want you. How could you possibly live up to Peggy Carter? You had no idea that the Captain had plans to make you his…whether you’re ready or not.

Chapter Summary: Steve begins to make plans. *This chapter does not contain non-con.

Additional Notes: Hey everyone! This is a new fic inspired by @jtargaryen18‘s 30 Days of Chris Challenge! This is not beta-read, so any and all mistakes are my own! If you would like to be added to the taglist, please let me know. Hope you enjoy! Gif is mine!

@nekoannie-chan @newyorkgoddess @grav3dollie-666 @diaamondis @readermia @itsmycorneroftheinternet @patzammit @princessofdarkwinter @stargazingfangirl18 @honeyhan-123 @darkmcuficarchive @mandiiblanche @red–aren @captainchrisstan @villanellevi @chris-evans-indian-fanfic @itotallysaidformal @shlach

He hadn’t meant to eavesdrop that day. Super soldier hearing didn’t always make it easy to block out the conversations around him, but he never meant to intrude upon yours. He did his best to respect boundaries with you, even when he wanted more. When he heard the topic of dating though, he got curious. He never saw you with anyone. The thought of you dating anyone made his gut twist. No, he didn’t like that at all.

“Oh, come on! This isn’t the 1940’s. Just ask him out,” some agent told you, not really caring who.

“No. I’m…not interested,” you said.

That coil in his gut tightened when he heard you say that. He had to admit, it hurt. Really hurt. It wasn’t his pride necessarily, but something much deeper. It brought him back to years ago when girls left and right ignored him. Rejected him. Wanted nothing to do with him. He never thought you would be the type.

“You’re such a liar. Everyone knows you’re crazy about him.”

A small smile touched his lips at that. It soothed the burn he felt in his heart. And by the way your heart raced, it helped confirm it. He had seen the longing glances and the way you blushed when he addressed you. You had sass at times, but you ultimately respected his authority. That pleased him.

“He isn’t crazy about me,” you said softly, like you were trying to hide how much it hurt. “I’m not Peggy Carter. Hell, I’m not even Sharon. I don’t…I don’t want to compete with a ghost or a memory. I don’t want to be second place in anyone’s heart. And that’s exactly what I would be with Steve. So can we please drop it?”

He bit his lip, refraining from calling out and letting you know that you were wrong. It wasn’t a competition. It was true that you weren’t Peggy, but that was what held his attention. You were different. So wonderfully different.

“I think you would be good for him.”

“You saw how he was when he came back. He wanted to be with her and he didn’t get that chance. So just drop it. I’m serious,” you snapped.

He swallowed a little. It was rough when he returned, but that wasn’t your fault. He knew you tried to sound angry, but there were tears in your throat. He hated the thought of you crying. At least, sad tears. At night when he was alone, it was easy for him to imagine how you would look underneath him. Tears streaming down your cheeks from how badly you needed to come-

“Well…I think Bucky may have a thing for you.”

Taking a small step back, he took a deep breath. It took everything in him not to destroy the door. Bucky was his best friend and he had come a long way after everything. He deserved to be happy. But…he didn’t need you. Not like he did.

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asgardiangurll · 2 years

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All I have to do is Dream Part 4

Pairing: Steve x Reader, Telepath! Reader (X-men reader)

Summary: It’s been five years since the snap. You and Steve are stuck at an impasse. You want a family, he doesn’t. He says he’s moved on but has he really? With your doubts growing, you consider risking his trust and use your powers on him to get your answers once and for all.

Author’s notes: I know, I know, I’m sorry it took so long. I fully scrapped the other draft I wrote (might edit that as a one shot down the road). Wanted to make this a bit more angsty. Enjoy!

Warning/s: Angst, Anxiety

Masterlist

You allowed yourself to count to 60 in the parking lot, your head resting on the wheel, working on keeping your breaths even. But when 60 seconds turned into three minutes and you still received no phone calls, you moved the car into drive.

Sorry, Steve but how the hell could you expect me to stay still?

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asgardiangurll · 2 years

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Out Of My League

Summary: Kind of based on that scene in ‘How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days’. Reader is out of their league, Bucky asks her out at an event. This is just short and sweet, I won’t bother with a crappy summary.. despite how this is very crapy.

Warning(s): reader is kind of oblivious, fluff, tony being a lil protective, sam x reader a little idk, sam is fruity as fuck and tony is hot

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Fem!Reader/Doctor!Reader

Characters: Bucky Barnes, Sam Wilson, Steve Rogers, brief Tony Stark

Word count: 2.8k

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asgardiangurll · 2 years

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Wicked Games IV

Paring: Bucky Barnes x Fem Reader (Avenger)

Word Count: 5K

Summary: You need to give him up, but it’s just too good.

Warnings: This series is 18+, MDI. Smut, Unprotected Sex, Spanking, Cursing, Dirty Talk, Cheating, Heartbreak, Angst

A/N: So here is part four!! I’m really happy with where this part went and I really do think this gives us all a lot of answers. I do have a rough plan for the final part but I’ve not started working on it yet. I’d be really interested to see how you guys want this series to end, so let me know!!

Dividers by the fantastic @firefly-graphics

Previous Part | Masterlist

Bucky’s eyes flickered from you to Steve and back again, scratching like a broken record. He shook his head, breaking the cycle.

His eyes trailed down from your face, along the red spaghetti strap and along the curve of your body. His stare hardened when saw your fingers intertwined with Steve’s.

To see his best friend cozied up with you, was truly the last thing he’d expected to see tonight.

You wanted to shrink into the fabric wall. Your stomach twisted in anguish as you met his cold gaze, his jaw was tight enough to cut glass. It was a whirlwind of emotions, anxiety, guilt, anger, hurt. It made your head spin.

“Hi, you too!” She chirped happily, pulling Bucky’s densely heavy body into the elevator. His girlfriend’s voice was a bucket of ice cold water being poured down your back. You mustered up a quiet hello as your eyes focused on the fibres of the carpeted floor.

Steve sensed the tension in the air and took the lead on the conversation. “How are you both this fine evening?” His words dived deep into bleeding wounds.

As though she hadn’t spoken to anyone in months, his girlfriend flew into a conversation with Steve. Whilst Bucky only grunted in response, his eyes burning a hole in yours and Steve’s hands. Silently he hoped he could draw your hands apart if he stared hard enough.

Their voices drowned into a white noise around you as you tuned into the harsh thud of your heart in your chest. Steve’s hold on your hand was the only thing keeping you grounded physically as you plummeted down further into the ground.

Though mentally, you were free falling, spiralling out of control. Drawing in the memories of your clandestine affair.

You chanced a look at him but he was already staring back at you with a vague expression. A hundred and one things flitted through his mind, words dancing on the tip of his tongue that remained unspoken because of the setting. It was too difficult to look at him, so you just looked away.

It broke your heart that you weren’t prepared for this moment. That seeing him made you feel so conflicted, you wanted to hate him but you couldn’t.

Steve squeezed your hand, breathing life back into your gormless figure. “Huh?” You muttered surveying the three of them, your own voice didn’t sound as though it belonged to you.

“You look a little unwell, is everything okay?” Bucky’s girlfriend asked earnestly.

You nodded somewhat frantically, “yeah, just not a fan of elevator’s when they are full of people.” You could feel Bucky’s presence re-enter the room, could practically feel his smirk radiating off his lips.

“Yeah if I remember correctly I had to come up with some pretty good distraction techniques for you.” He mocked.

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asgardiangurll · 2 years

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Cooking dinner with Steve pre-snap reversal in AIHR, when reader was still non comfortable with having sex with Steve. 😈 I'm guessing cooking with the reader turns him on n he wants a snack 😉 before dinner.

(Okay, so this takes place during AHIAR after the break-in but before dinner with Spencer which was the night before the SNAP was reversed… And apologies for any inaccuracies on the cooking part. I can’t cook worth a damn! Lol )

Steve had made good on his promise to get you a couple of cookbooks. You hadn’t cooked a lot, but the one cookbook explained the basics. You were actually having fun learning and aside from watching television – still not taking that for granted – what were you going to do? You decided to try something that you’d never made before but that seemed pretty simple.

The days had been chilly, so you decided on Brunswick stew. You’d given Steve the list of what you needed the night before and everything had been delivered by noon. Convenient. You started by cooking the pork a couple of hours before you wanted dinner ready. When it was ready, you decided to start prep work for your stew. You were getting ready to chop your onion when you heard the front door.

Steve was home early. Things were better with him, sure, since he’d moved you upstairs. But you still couldn’t help but tense up. If he was home early, was something wrong? Had you done something wrong?

“Hey, babydoll,” he smiled at you as he walked into the kitchen. “We got finished early today.”

There you stood in the kitchen in your jeans, his shirt, no shoes. You’d pulled your hair back into a messy bun. Damn it. You usually had yourself more put together by the time he got home.

“Sorry,” you told him, tugging on the hem of his t-shirt. “I haven’t dressed for dinner yet.”

Steve shook his head. “You’re making dinner… How’s it going?”

“It’s going,” you tried to sound more confident than you really were. You didn’t want to cut up the onion with him watching. You’d cut off a finger for sure.

“Can I help?”

Oh, that not-so-innocent smile on his face…

“I’m good,” you said. “I’m sure you’re tired… I’ll let you know if I need anything.”

Steve came closer. “I enjoy tooling around the kitchen.”

Fuck.

Your heart was flying in your chest as you went back to the cutting board and got ready to chop up the onion you’d prepared there. You’d already taken off the outer layer and the ends. Now you just needed to chop it up.

You felt him crowd you against the counter which didn’t help as you chopped the onion in half. His large hands settled at your waist and he was watching over your shoulder.

No pressure.

The knife shook in your hand now. Damn it.

“Have you done this before?” his deep voice was close to your ear.

You shivered in his grasp.

“Not a lot,” you admitted.

“Here,” he said with a sigh. His hands moved over yours, taking control of the knife in your right hand but keeping your hand under his. He began chopping one half of the onion with expert strokes while you watched. The slices were perfect, all the same size.

When you felt his lips press against the side of your neck, you jumped a little.

“Okay, do the other half,” he whispered by your ear, chuckling when you shivered, trapped between him and the counter.

When Steve pressed the heated length of himself firmly into your ass, you were mentally shaking your head.

His hands returned to your waist as you began to slice up the other half of the yellow onion. Having watched him do it, you felt a little more confident. Your cuts weren’t as perfect as his but you did a pretty good job until you got to the end of the onion.

Steve’s hands slid up your torso as you tried to work, covering your breasts and gently kneading them. To make matters worse, he was still grinding against you.

“No bra?” His lips teased the lobe of your ear.

Your last couple of cuts were a disaster as he teased your breasts. You gasped as his fingers began to tease your nipples through the shirt.

“No,” you muttered, managing to finish cutting the onion somehow.

While you could tell where this was going, you were going to finish getting your stew put together.

Leaning in the direction of your cookbook, you saw that you needed to mince three cloves of garlic next. And Steve didn’t force the issue. His hands slid back down to your waist as you grabbed the garlic and set them on your board.

“Garlic’s next?”

You nodded, peeling them quickly. You knew that much and then you read again that you needed to mince them. You had no idea what to do there.

Of course Steve picked up on your hesitation. Then he proceeded to demonstrate to you how to crush the peeled garlic pieces beneath the flat part of the knife’s blade and then he started rocking the knife back and forth, mincing everything perfectly.

He helped you chop up the pork and add an assortment of other ingredients until you got it put together. All the while, he was all hands. Teasing your breasts, your ass, and even sliding a hand down between your legs while you were opening the canned tomatoes.

Still, you enjoyed working together with him in the kitchen, add things, stirring.

Pulling a clean spoon from the drawer, Steve got a taste from the huge pot of stew the two of you created, blowing on it before trying it.

“Well?” You hoped it turned out okay. He seemed happy.

Steve nodded, smiling. “It’s good. How long does it need to cook?”

Glancing back over the recipe in the book, you scanned the page until you found the answer. “An hour and a half.”

Steve pulled another spoon out and another spoonful from the stew before covering it and letting it simmer. He blew on that before holding it out for you.

Okay, it was good. You were feeling pretty proud right now.

Which was probably why you didn’t immediately see Steve coming.

He lowered his head and his mouth claimed yours for a kiss. He took your breath away, his heated kiss tantalizing you as he backed you out of the kitchen. When the edge of the kitchen table met the backs of your thighs, you gasped. Steve took advantage to slide his tongue in against yours.

Roughly grabbing your thighs, he hauled you up on the table and pushed you back onto its surface with your ass at the edge. Pressing himself in between your thighs, Steve drugged you with soft kisses as his hands skimmed up under his shirt and palmed your breasts.

“Do you have any idea how much I love this?” he whispered against the sensitive column of your throat. “You in our kitchen, cooking for me?”

Steve roughly yanked up the t-shirt, pulling it off you and tossing it away. You were gasping beneath him as he got his hands and mouth on your breasts, teasing you with lips, tongue, and careful teeth. You could feel the heated length of him encased in his jeans, nudging into the vee of your thighs. He was moving so fast that all you could do was hang on. Your legs clamped around his hips, your hands sliding into his hair, over his shoulders.

Your nipples were diamond hard points when he was done, his fingers sliding down to rip open your jeans and haul them down your hips with your panties while you were still struggling to breathe.

“Steve?” you whispered, watching as he tossed the rest of your clothes away.

Steve took a knee, hauling your legs over his shoulders before pressing his face into the flesh that he’d made ache with everything he’d done so far. And Steve knew, he knew, that when he got his mouth on you, you were truly lost to him.

It was so easy for him to hold your hips to the table with one strong hand. The other spread your lower lips open for his mouth. While his tongue teased your clit with the softest kitten licks while one strong finger slid into your aching channel.

You went wild above him, your hands clutching in his hair, your body curving around his head as he took you apart. Steve was unphased as his finger tested your inner walls while his tongue distracted you. By the time that finger found that spot in you that rendered you helpless, you were wailing into the silence of the combined kitchen and dining room. His tongue was lashing your bundle of nerves in a way that had you ready to shatter.

When another finger slid into your channel, you came undone. You cried out as Steve doubled his efforts, his fingers teasing your channel while he sucked on your clit lightly, in every way he knew you couldn’t resist.

His fingers pulled from you, leaving you clenching and empty. When had you become such a slave to his touch? You lay on the table, weak and shaking…

When his mouth pressed in against your sensitive flesh, you cried out. When his tongue began to trace a furious circuit between your throbbing clit and your clenching, empty core, you begged, you gasped like a mindless thing on his wooden kitchen table… All the while Steve was lapping up everything you had to offer, hot puffs of his breath pushing your desire up to an insane level…

When his touch left you entirely, you reached out for him. Your hands pressed against the hard planes of his abs when he rose from the floor. You watched him tear open his jeans, shoving them roughly past his hips. When he’d freed his cock, all angry, swollen and red, you tried, you really did, to reach for it. You tried to sit up, wanting to get your mouth on him.

“No, Sweetheart,” Steve grabbed your wrists, pressed them down to the table and collected them in just one hand. “Later. I need to be inside of you right now… Let me in?”

You didn’t get to answer that question. The other hand lined his cock up with your greedy entrance and began to push into you.

“Steve, yes…”

Would you ever get used to the way he split you open, filling you until you couldn’t breathe? By the time Steve bottomed out inside of you. you were a trembling mess in his grasp. Your legs couldn’t have gripped his hips any tighter. When he slid his hands under you to hook over your shoulders and pull you down against his cock, you wove your hands into his hair and tried to hang on.

Steve moved in you with a possessiveness that left you reeling. He already owned your body, proved that every time he touched you. But he fucked you like he was laying claim to your soul, claiming everything you were and everything you would ever be. The world narrowed down to the hot, driving length of him moving furiously in and out of you and you were powerless to do anything but let him.

When his fingers slid down your body and began to tease your clit, you clenched around him hard.

“That’s it,” he whispered, his tongue teased the sensitive shell of your ear. “Want to feel you come…”

What choice did you have? Steve pinned you to his kitchen table with his body, making you take his cock like you were born for that purpose. His fingers knew just how to touch to you to drive you insane…

You thrashed beneath him, screaming. As you watched, Steve lost control as you clamped hard around him, driving into you hard and fast until he couldn’t hold on anymore. His growled filled the kitchen, filled your ears as you spasms of pleasure left you dazed on the table, writhing mindlessly beneath him.

When you came around you heard the sound of his breathing, the sound of your breathing.,,

After a few moments, you felt Steve gently pull free of you. You made a pitiful sound when he did that sounded odd, even to you.

It wasn’t until he scooped you up from the table, carrying you bridal style, that you realized he was still mostly dressed. The gentle motion of him walking with you almost had you drifting off to sleep.

“No, Sweetheart,” he leaned in close to your ear. “Just going to get us cleaned up for dinner.”

Steve carefully placed you on the counter next to the bathroom sink. You could feel his come seeping from you, trickling down over one of your thighs. You watched as Steve stripped off his Henley, his jeans. He pulled off his socks and boxers.

Then he started the shower, adjusting the water until it got warm enough. He knew by now how much you couldn’t bear even lukewarm water.

When he had everything ready, he came back to you, insinuating himself between your thighs and hauling you up by them. Carrying you into the shower, it didn’t occur to you to hang on until he pinned you against the shower wall.

Glancing down, you saw that he was hard again and swollen.

“Steve?”

He cut off whatever you were about to say with a scorching kiss.

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asgardiangurll · 2 years

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Bring A Souvenir

Bucky x reader

Summary: You know how to get what you want.

Word Count: 402

You are flying to the next mission along with Bucky, Steve, and Sam. It should be an easy mission if everything would go as planned. Extract some top-secret information and get out of there before anyone sees anything.

Bucky was sharpening his knife when you walked up to him. “Buck?”

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asgardiangurll · 2 years

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All I have to do is Dream Part 4

Pairing: Steve x Reader, Telepath! Reader (X-men reader)

Author’s notes: I know, I know, I’m sorry it took so long. I fully scrapped the other draft I wrote (might edit that as a one shot down the road). Wanted to make this a bit more angsty. Enjoy!

Warning/s: Angst, Anxiety

Masterlist

Sorry, Steve but how the hell could you expect me to stay still?

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asgardiangurll · 2 years

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Title: Ghosts of the Past

Summary: Haunted by past decisions, Steve Rogers makes a choice and it isn’t you

*No permission is given for reposting my work, copying it, ideas or parts it and claiming it as your own*

Warning: all the angst. Also, I guess “Endgame” spoilers if you haven’t seen it yet. Do we still need a warning for that?

Author’s Note: This is the first time I’ve written for Steve Rogers or anything Marvel but this idea has been living in my head rent free for weeks. Please be gentle.

A/N 2: This story takes place after the events of “Endgame.” Everything happens in the same way as it does in canon except the compound wasn’t the location of the standoff with Thanos. You have a background as an assassin before being recruited to S.H.I.E.L.D.

A/N 3: not beta’d. We die by our typos

Part 2: Ever-present Shadow

You had been looking for him all afternoon. After the meeting ended, what was left of the Avengers scattered for the day, trying to figure out how to return to some semblance of normality. Steve had uncharacteristically been quiet while Bruce explained the points in time each Stone had to be returned to. You figured he was trying to absorb the information, each placement was crucial to restoring the timeline. But something felt off. You meant to ask him what he was thinking before Sam sidetracked you when he drew you into an argument with Bucky over dinner plans. By the time you looked away from the troublesome friends, Steve was nowhere to be found. You spent the better part of an hour searching for him all over the massive compound until you spotted your fair haired lover in the middle of the flower garden.

Tony had begrudgingly placed it away from the main buildings. He joked that Pepper wanted something pretty to look at but you suspected the troubled inventor installed it as a sort of sanctuary, a place to come and sit quietly to reflect on things. You and Steve had spent many hours walking through the greenery. On one of those fateful walks, he found out your training had included floriography; you explained that it was a way to say what couldn’t be spoken aloud and came in handy during covert missions. The way your eyes twinkled as you casually spoke about your past gave Steve pause on the validity of the information. Despite being one of the top assassins recruited to S.H.I.E.L.D., your effervescent persona made it hard to believe you were a cold blooded killer. The bubbling laugh that came so easily to your lips hinted at mischief and made him question how you were ever a successful spy. He concluded that no one would ever expect to be infiltrated by the world’s cheeriest person who projected sunshine everywhere she went. It was there in the garden—your garden—that you found him sitting by himself, lost in thought.

“Steve?” you lightly called out. You noticed his body stiffen at the sound of your voice but he didn’t lift his head. You stepped closer to him. “Ste—“

Your eyes fell to the flower he cradled in hands. A single chrysanthemum—goodbye. In that moment, you understood his reticence to make eye contact. He was going back and staying...with her. You let out a choked gasp as the realization hit you. Steve lifted his eyes to meet yours at the sound. Brilliant blue eyes that once looked at you with love and adoration were now filled with despair and regret.

A strained hushed question broke the silence. “You’re not coming back, are you?”

“Y/N…”

You repeated with a firmer voice, “Are you?”

“No.”

You closed your eyes at his answer. The small flame of hope you didn’t know you held extinguished with one word. It was quickly replaced with a new feeling. Hurt. Rage. Betrayal. Steeling yourself, you opened your eyes and met his gaze. Seeing his distraught face only fueled your anger. What right did he have to look so miserable when he was choosing this outcome?

“Aren’t I enough?” you challenged. You wanted him to explain himself, not that it would change anything. You just needed to know why.

Steve took a step in your direction but stopped himself when he noticed you backed away, keeping the same amount of distance between you. You eyed him warily. He took a deep breath, steadying himself before answering, “I love you, truly I do.” He lifted his arms as if to reach out to you but stopped himself when he noticed the flower he still held, reminding him of his choice.

“You have meant everything to me these last few years. You kept me going when I wasn’t sure of anything, not even myself. And I thought…” he paused as if searching for the right words to explain why he was breaking your heart, “if going back wasn’t a possibility, I thought you and I would be it. We would be the endgame. Marriage. Home. Kids. All of it.” Your eyes welled up at the unspoken dream you had longed for. “But now...now I’m being offered the chance to go back and have that with Pe—her.” You winced at the almost mention of the name of the woman who would be getting your happily ever after.

Collecting himself, Steve continued, “All these years, a part of me wondered what my life would have been like had I not crashed that plane and been frozen. I fantasized about it until I met you. And for a while, that part of me slept. But after the Snap…when my last connection to home left with Bucky being turned to ash, the thought of it ate me up. It was slow and gradual and I never meant for it to mean anything. But now...I…” he hesitated to say the words that would cause you pain. “I have a chance to change that. I know it’s selfish and I’m an asshole for doing this, but I owe it to myself to give it a chance.” He looked at you, pleading with you to understand his reasoning.

Hearing his innermost thoughts and how you were the consolation prize broke you. You thought your assassin training would have prepared you for the pain but no one could have trained you to endure the soul crushing anguish you were experiencing at this moment.

“I love—“

“DON’T,” you screamed out. “Don’t say something you don’t mean.”

“Please, baby.”

“I hate you,” you hissed vehemently. “I hate you Steve Rogers. I hate that you lied to me all these years. I hate that you made me fall in love with you because you never really meant it.” You willed your tears to keep at bay. “I wished I had never met you.” You turned to walk away from the remnants of your shattered heart.

“Y/N. Please,” he begged.

Straightening your spine, you walked away from the man you loved with every fiber of your being but who didn’t love you nearly as much as he claimed to. With tears in your eyes, your pace never faltered as you made your way back to the compound. Sure his enhanced hearing would pick up your words, you whispered, “Goodbye.”

* * * * *

Steve stood off to the side as Bruce flitted around the consol, checking to make sure all the calculations were correct. He had already run through it at least a dozen times but he found comfort in the concrete nature of numbers. Steve bid farewell to Sam and Bucky, clapping the latter on the back and drawing him in for a hug.

“Don’t do anything stupid without me,” reminded Steve.

A somber Bucky quickly quipped, “How can I when you’re taking it with you?” Nostalgia touched their matching smiles.

“Hey!” called out Sam. “Where’s Y/N? Isn’t she coming for this?”

A moment of hurt crossed his face at the memory of your parting. Shaking his head, Steve dismissed your absence and told them he’d see them soon. With a solemn nod to his friends, he stepped onto the launch pad. Saying a silent goodbye to the present, he returned to the past to find his future.

* * * * *

After you walked away—because you wouldn’t let him see how devastated you were by his decision—you quickly formulated a plan for your next steps. There was no way you’d stay here on the compound, surrounded by the memories you’d made here together. You knew the others would be nothing but sympathetic to your plight but there would be a touch of pity in their eyes. You could’ve handled the commiseration to some extent. You’re sure Bucky would be angry for you, declaring he’d go find Steve in the present and kick his ass for you...even if it meant fighting an elder. Sam would’ve seen it his mission to distract you by picking some insane fight with Bucky, followed by some well meaning attempts to get you to share your feelings. The good doctor would make an attempt at well meaning words to comfort you but would suddenly falter at the realization he was out of his league. You allowed yourself a small smile at the thought of how they’d try to help you grieve your loss.

But you knew you couldn’t stay. Though you had all lost people in the last month, this was different. Nat and Tony had made a sacrifice for the greater good; they lost their lives in order to save the future. But Steve was choosing to leave you of his own free will. There was no noble purpose about the decision. He was willingly walking away from you and your future together. That made it all the more painful.

You looked around what was technically your room, though you had spent most of your time in his quarters. Grabbing a backpack from your closet, you quickly packed your essentials into it, leaving the rest behind. Making your way to what was Tony’s office, you quickly bypassed F.R.I.D.A.Y’s systems, transferring all your funds into an untraceable bank account before systematically deleting all traces of your existence in the database. You methodically worked through all the memory banks, deleting any mentions or photos of you. As far as anyone was concerned, you had become a ghost in the system. After making sure all your footprints in the computer system would be destroyed upon your exit from the building, you quickly made your way to one last stop before you disappeared for good.

* * * * *

Tap tap tap. The wooden door swung open and you found yourself face to face with the flaxen beauty who was like family to you. You had been one of the few people Pepper and Tony entrusted Morgan with. Morgan adored you and often requested your babysitting services; you always happily complied with when not out on missions. Leaving them behind would be the hardest part about your decision.

“Y/N what are you doing here?” she asked, ushering you inside.

You stepped inside the homey cabin filled with many happy memories. Everywhere you looked, each room was overlaid with a layer of wistfulness. Tony’s presence was felt everywhere.

A half whispered question spilled out as you took a look around. “How do you do it?”

Surprised by the question, Pepper led you to the couch where you both sat down. Unsure of where your curiosity was leading to, she answered, “Honestly? Morgan helps a lot. I can’t let myself fall apart because she needs me. We cry when we need to, talk about him a lot. It’s hard but she gives me a reason to keep moving on.” She paused and gave you a hard look. “What’s this about? I know you didn’t drive all the way out here without notice just to drop by for a chat.”

“I’m leaving,” you whispered.

“What?”

“Steve is going back to put the Stones back tomorrow and when he does,” you paused, hurt filling your expression, “when he does, he’ll be staying behind with Peggy.”

“Why the hell would he do that?! What about you? Your life here together?!”

You shrugged your shoulders and heaved a sigh of disbelief. “He chose her. He wants to be with her,” you explained painfully. “And I—I can’t stay here. I’m not like you.” You looked into her eyes as the comprehension set in. “There’s too many ghosts.”

“But we’re here,” she said, trying to appeal to you. “You could stay here if you need some time. We’d love to have you.”

“I can’t. I wish I could but I can’t.” Heaving a deep sigh, you explained, “Ste—him not choosing me...that was not something I ever expected, Pepper. I just, I’m not just heartbroken here. I feel utterly betrayed and broken by his selfish decision. I don’t know who I am without him. Isn’t that stupid? Me? I let him somehow work his way into my heart, believing all his promises of a future together when all along it would never happen. I was never going to be enough.” You took a breath, trying to control the growing tightening feeling in your chest. “Even if he’s not here, everything about this life will remind me of him,” you said, gesturing to your surroundings.

She reached out and grabbed hold of your hand. That one small touch of comfort crumbled your facade and the dam of tears broke. Your face crumpled; you leaned forward to let the tears freely fall. Taken by surprise at your out of character breakdown, Pepper moved close to you and held you against her as she let you lament over your losses. You wept for the deaths of two of your closest friends. You grieved for the betrayal by the man you loved more than life itself. You mourned the future that had been snatched away from you, made all the worse by a selfish decision.

The broken sobs were suddenly interrupted by a pair of soft feet thumping down the staircase. Realizing who it must be, you quickly gathered your emotions and wiped away the tears from your eyes just in time to hear a loud screech.

“Y/N!!!!! YOU’RE HERE!” shouted the small girl excitedly. “Are you here to play with me so mommy can go do some grown up things? We could play tea party and have sandwiches.” She threw her small frame, leaping into your arms. You gathered her into your lap, burying your face into her hair.

“Baby,” called Pepper, “Y/N isn’t here to play today.”

Hearing her mother’s statement, Morgan lifted her head and looked up at you. Her innocent stare took in your red rimmed eyes. She reached a small hand up to your cheek, asking, “Why are you sad?”

Trying to reign in your errant emotions, you plastered a cheerful smile on your face before answering her. “I came here to say goodbye, Pix,” you informed her. “I’m feeling sad because I have to leave you and your mommy and I’m going to miss you both so much.”

“But you’re coming back after, right? Like all your other missions.”

“No, I don’t think so.”

“Morgan,” Pepper’s quiet tone broke in, “Y/N has to go away but she came here to say goodbye before she goes.”

Seemingly deep in thought trying to process her mother’s words, she suddenly looked up thoughtfully and whispered, “Are you leaving me like daddy?”

Pepper’s face crumbled at the question and tears welled up in her eyes. You exchanged glances with her, two women sharing the pain of losing loved ones. You ducked your head and looked into the small girl’s eyes. “Your daddy was a hero, you know that, right? He was one of the bravest men I’ve ever met and I know if he could be here with you right now, he would be. I have to go away. I don’t know when I’ll be back.” A small whimper escaped from Morgan at your words. “But I promise you, that I’ll be thinking of you. Wherever I’m at, I’ll be missing you and thinking of my little fairy and wishing I could step beyond the veil to see what games you and the other fair folk are up to.”

The thought brought a small smile to her lips before she suddenly remembered something. “But you’ll miss my birthday.” A small frown marred her angelic face.

“How about this? Wherever I’m at, I’ll send something so you and your mommy know I’m safe and thinking of you both, ok?”

The littlest Stark nodded her head solemnly.

Wrapping your arms around her, you squeezed her tightly and took a last look around at your surroundings. “I love you, Pix. Very much. You both mean the world to me. I hope someday we can see each other again.”

Looking up at a tearful Pepper, you withdrew several envelopes from your jacket pocket, each with a name on them. “Will you give these to them?” you asked her. “I didn’t get a chance to say goodbye because I knew they would’ve tried to stop me.” Handing over the letters, you gently pried the tiny arms from around your neck and placed Morgan into her mom’s embrace.

“Be safe out there,” Pepper reminded you.

You turned to her one last time. “Always am,” you said with a broken smile. With one last hug to both of them, you stepped out onto the porch, leaving your past behind.

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asgardiangurll · 3 years

Text

never again

pairing: bucky barnes x enhanced!reader

summary: natasha likes to touch bucky's dog tags and bucky, well, he just wants to know why his favorite girl isn't talking to him.

They aren’t talking.

Bucky’s not sure why though because you guys were good. Great even. Always talking, laughing, and touching. A few things Bucky thought he wouldn’t be good at anymore, scared of more like, but he was good at it with you.

So why were you so distant? It wasn’t like you to shut him out.

“Did you drink all the coffee again, Barton? Have a death wish or something?” Tony commented.

Bucky ignored him — him and the team as they bickered over breakfast as usual. Instead, he sat on the couch, waited for you to come out and have breakfast with him.

Natasha came over and sat beside him. They made small talk until you emerged from your room.

Your hair was still messy, smile still soft, and you were drowning in clothes. Bucky’s heart skipped a few beats. He might of looked too excited to see you or had some look on his face because you ignored him and took a seat at the table instead.

“Wanna sit on my lap, Y/N? I know you must be tired of Barnes over there,” Sam flirted.

You laughed, shaking your head. Bucky wanted to punch the wall because sitting on his lap was your thing. Your morning, having breakfast, and sitting on his lap thing. His favorite part of the day thing.

It didn’t help that later that day when he walked into the training room, you walked out.

You took one glance at him and walked out.

Bucky was getting frustrated.

And it didn’t seem to stop. When the team came together for their usual hike, you took a spot next to Sam and walked next to him until you reached the top. Bucky stayed close behind and clenched his fists when Sam made a stupid joke to make you laugh.

Bucky was getting really, really frustrated.

He thought maybe when he leaned down to tie your shoelaces that some of the tension would go away, that he would feel better.

“Bucky...”

“Got it, sweetheart. Lift your foot up for me.”

You did.

“I can tie it myself; you know?”

He didn’t say anything.

“James.”

“Y/N,” he mocked.

You rolled your eyes.

“Keep your hand on my shoulder or you’ll fall.”

“I’m fine.”

“Y/N,” he sternly said. “I know you’re mad at me, but you can’t walk around like this. Just hold on to me.”

“You’re taking a long time and I can heal if…,” you mumbled. “and I’m not mad at you.”

“Really?”

You glared at him, “I’m not, Buck.”

Bucky sighed. “Seems like you are, and I know you are because I know you. Came to your room last night and it was locked. F.R.I.D.A.Y said you didn’t want to see anyone.”

“Had a nightmare?”

“Couldn’t sleep without you.”

You almost responded, almost, but Natasha came, and you didn’t know what to say. Couldn’t in fact, so you pulled away and walked away.

Bucky thinks he’s finally figured it out.

It was movie night the next time Bucky saw you and he’s wondered if you’ve asked F.R.I.D.A.Y for new routes so you could avoid him. Bucky was slowly losing his mind and he couldn’t take it anymore. He couldn’t, so when you walked out of the room and headed to kitchen, he decided to follow.

“Tell me what’s wrong.”

“I’m getting popcorn.”

“Y/N,” Bucky breathed out. “I’m being serious.”

“Bucky, I don’t want to talk about this.”

“Well, I want to talk about— where are you going? Can you just stop — “

Bucky lifted you up and placed you on the kitchen counter. Placed himself right between your legs so you couldn’t move.

“Talk to me, sweetheart,” he placed his forehead on yours. “We haven’t talked in weeks. Did I do something wrong? Is it Natasha?”

“No. No, why would you think that?”

Bucky stared at you. God, he’s missed you — your eyes, your hands and your touch. Why wouldn’t you touch him? You always did and now…now it had been so long since he felt it, you, and he missed it. He missed how good it felt, how you felt against him.

You started playing with his dog tags.

Bucky swears his heart stops beating for a second. Swears he’s stopped breathing too because you weren’t touching him, no, but you were touching a part of him that meant a whole deal to him.

“Y/N, I — "

“Buck, you’re missing the movie. Steve’s about to have a oh— "Natasha interrupted.

You released your hand from the chain, “We should go.”

“Y/N.”

“Bucky, we need to go. Please let me go.”

He did.

He hated that he did, and he thought about it for the next week, till he was on his next mission. Maybe that’s why he was so distant with the team, why he didn’t pay attention to the briefing and Steve’s speech. He didn’t care, he didn’t.

It showed on the field.

Steve was mad.

“Why did Steve just tell me that you didn’t listen to the plan? That you ran into open fire? Let some guy punch you?”

Bucky didn’t respond to you. Just took a spot on the empty clinic chair.

“Is that what we’re doing now, Buck? Letting people punch us?”

Us.

Bucky shut his eyes and opened them back up to look at you. My God, you looked so angry. His girl was so angry at him.

Us.

Your hands were on his wounds in seconds and in seconds, Bucky was healed and, in more places, than just the parts that were beaten or bruised. You always reached more places than anyone else could, healed more parts of him than anyone else could.

“Are you going to talk to me?” You muttered, pressing your hand against his chest. “Buck?”

You slowly removed your hand, but Bucky grabbed it and placed right back on his chest.

“Just keep touching me, Y/N.”

You paused. Bucky watched as you got more red.

“Keep touching you? I thought you never wanted me to use my powers on you, thought the serum could heal it all. Are you even going to tell me what happened?" your voice was strong. "Did you really let this guy punch you? Beat you purple? Are you kidding, James? How could you let him?”

“How could you not talk to me?”

That shut you up. Bucky didn’t know if you understood what he was trying to say, hoped that you did because he really didn’t want to explain it — didn’t want to explain that he let himself get punched and beaten to have your hands on him.

“Never again, Buck. Never let anyone hurt you like this again.”

“Never not talk to me,” he admitted and pulled you onto his lap. His hands stayed on your hips, while your legs dangled off his lap.

You continued to place your hands on his wounded parts.

“She’s always near you.”

“Natasha?”

“Yeah…yeah and she’s always touching you,” you placed your hands on his dog tags. “Touching these and I know — I know how much they mean to you. How important they are, and you’ve never let anyone but....but”

“But you,” he finished, moving some strands of your hair away from your face. “Never let anyone but you touch them.”

“She has.”

“Never noticed. Too busy focusing on you.”

You shook your head.

“Sweetheart…”

Then you heard footsteps and out of corner of your eye, you saw that bright red hair and black bodysuit approach you and you almost got up — almost, but Bucky held your hips. Kept you in place and you heard him tell Natasha that he was busy, that he was doing something important.

You heard her walk out.

Then you wanted to say something, anything. Anything to get out of this situation, anything to fix all those red and purple spots on his body. Just anything, but you couldn’t. Walking away would’ve been so much easier.

“She’s nothing compared to you, sweetheart,” he confessed. “Nothing, okay? You’re everything.”

“Yeah, but — “

Then Bucky slipped off his dog tags and placed them around your neck.

“Everything,” he repeated.

You’re sure your world stopped. He was so good at making you speechless, always had been. Sometimes you wondered if he was made just to make you speechless. His lip was still a little busted and you reached up and ran your thumb across it, healed it in seconds.

“Promise you won’t do this again?”

“Promise you’ll talk to me?”

“Yeah,” you looked up at him, ran your hand through his hair. “Yeah, I’ll talk to you.”

No, he was made to be loved by you.

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asgardiangurll · 3 years

Text

Crawl Home to Her

summary: Stranded without coms, alone, and bleeding out in the middle of a Russian snow storm, Bucky is content to let nature take its course. Only you won’t seem to let him go. pairing: bucky x reader word count: 8k warnings: passive suicidal thoughts, hallucinations, ghosts???, its all very confusing but humor me ok, a/n: based on Work Song by Hozier ✨

No grave can hold my body down I’ll crawl home to her

Laid amongst old wooden floors rotted in decades of weathering and the whistling brush of wind sweeping in steady drift of snow from the open doorway, Bucky wondered whether he might have preferred the coffin of ice Hydra once shoved him in for storage.

The chill nestled deep into his bones and he tried not to focus on the small puff of breath as it touched over chapped, cracked lips. It was the only warmth he had left and that, too, was leaving him.

It was getting hard to breath under the sting of freezing temperatures barreling into the cabin; sharp, like crystals had formed in his lungs and punctured into his chest from the inside. The fireplace long extinguished, his rifle laid in a heap amongst his tactical vest and gear too far out of reach. He was unprepared when the mercenaries barreled in through the windows, leaving shattered glass along the floor, safe house exposed to the elements of a Russian winter.

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asgardiangurll · 3 years

Text

A Favor (Part 1)

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Word Count: 2.6k

Warnings: sex, alcohol, swearing, shitty exes, virginity

Summary: After breaking up with her boyfriend; Y/N drunkenly admits to the team that she’s never had sex. Not only is she single, but she’s looking. Everyone knows about the crush Barnes harbours for Y/N, but all is fair in love and war… will Barnes admit how he feels before she’s swept up? Or will Y/N find someone else to satisfy her needs?

Part 2

Series Masterlist

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asgardiangurll · 3 years

Text

Last Minutes-B.B.

DON’T STEAL, REPOST, OR TRANSLATE MY STUFF!!!!

a/n- Please like, comment, and reblog!! It means a lot to me that i know anyone who reads my stuff, likes my work! Don’t be afraid to send me asks as well. I’m not currently taking requests(i’ll occasionally ask for ideas though!), but i’m always open to talk to new ppl:)

Summary: You and Bucky spend your last few minutes together.

Warnings n stuff: 18+, this isn’t any particular au but all the avengers n shit are alive so, this is sad and angsty as hell please have a tissue ready

All mistakes within this fic are my own!

i’m currently hosting my first writing event! i extended the deadline as well! here is the link to the rules & prompts!!!

Bucky’s arms hold you tight against him. Your head is pressed firmly against his chest. You can hear the steady thump, thump, thumping of his heart against his chest. It’s a little faster than normal, but why wouldn’t it be?

Your breathing is unsteady and you’re shaking- somehow he’s more stable and is able to hold you up or your knees would collapse your whole body onto the floor beneath you two.

This isn’t how you expected the end to come. Out of all the gun fire, explosions, and knives thrown at you, you hadn’t expected to go out like this.

It’s pelting outside. The rain hasn’t stopped falling for four weeks and the winds started knocking the power out in cities a week in. The tower was one of the last places to lose power, and if you’d know that people weren’t hopelessly wishing that they’d be rescued by some force, you’d think they’d be jealous of you and all of your teammates.

But they’re not. They’re just wanting life to be back to normal.

They don’t want to die, just like the rest of you.

Bucky pets your hair to soothe you as best as he can. You both wanted the last few minutes to be spent only together. Every one of your friends understood. You two were on the run together from when he escaped HYDRA, you were nearly there for him more than Steve ever has been, and Bucky confides in you for everything. You’re his own little slice of heaven. His safe place, his home.

And he’s yours.

Steve didn’t even abject to having Bucky push him out of the room after having a minute long hug, he knows the two of you are stronger than the force of the winds outside. But sadly, that won’t stop them from sweeping you away along with the rest of city.

“Baby?” Bucky finally speaks. You can hear him, feel him, smell him, but your eyes are closed so when he picks your head up from his chest, you can’t see him. “Hey, babydoll, look at me?” His tone is begging. He knows you’re scared. You even said it yourself earlier that this is one of the scariest things you’ve had to endure.

He understands.

“Buck.” Your voice quivers as you open your eyes up. And once you do, he finally sees the tears that are shielding the pretty colors of your soul keepers.

“Hey, it’s gonna be okay.” His metal thumb brushes over your cheek and you sniffle- then you allow a tear to finally fall. Somehow, you manage to smile at him, “i know, and it’s only because i’m with you.” Your hands come up shakily to his cheeks and you rest them there. You only stare into each other’s eyes as the winds outside get rougher. Gust after gust picks up light poles, vehicles, and even some homes.

This has been the worst storm they’ve ever seen- the meteorologists. The floods, the winds, the hail, the lighting. Everything. And if that’s all not enough, tsunamis to top it all off.

Half of the tower has been under water for five days. The tsunami is expected to hit shore in less than five minutes, and the impact will be enough to sweep the tower off of its unsteady legs and sweep you all out with it.

Bucky is going to hold onto you as long as he can. No matter if you die in his hold, he’ll still hold on. He won’t let go.

“I love you.” You whisper, but manage to shake your head. “I fucking love you, Bucky.” You say it louder this time, and Bucky nearly breaks.

The small, inexpensive ring in his pocket is calling out to him. It’s a golden band with a small stone in the middle of it- it was the best he could do at the time. Steve’s been telling him to give it to you, so that the two of you can at least say you made that step in your past life- maybe you’ll find each other again, too. Bucky has said, up until this point, “that’s stupid Stevie.”

“Babydoll, this is probably not the best time to-.” Bucky is then cut off by a loud crash from a near by room. You’re suspecting that one of the windows got blasted in- turns out, not even Stark technology can withstand a storm this fucking strong.

“Fuck….” Bucky curses, and he knows he doesn’t have long, so he releases you- even though he doesn’t want to- and gets down on one knee. The ring is then presented to you after he pulls it shakily, out of his jacket pocket, and you sob.

You don’t even need him to open it up before you’re muttering “yes, yes, yes, please put it on” and Bucky let’s a few tears fall, because he’s found the one. He never thought he would have, but you’re it. You’re it for him, and even though he’s scared shitless right now, he’s with you- and that’s what matters and that’s what’s keeping him together.

He hurriedly slips the ring onto your shaky finger after taking it out of the box, then he stands back up. It doesn’t even take him a single second more to engulf you back into his arms and press his lips to yours. He can taste your salty tears and you can taste his- both of you knowing that this is the last time you’ll get to feel the other.

The wind and rain is blocked out of your hearing as you imagine that it’s just the two of you and the world isn’t going to end as you know it. “Bucky…..you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me, and i feel like you deserve to know that.” You mumble against his lips and he pecks yours once more- his forehead resting against yours as he breathes you in.

“You’re the only person i could imagine spending my last minutes on Earth with, sweetheart.” You feel your whole body ignite into flames at his words. “Same to you, Mr. Barnes.” You press a kiss to his lips again, and he smiles. “I love you…..future Mrs. Barnes.” Bucky chokes up while saying it, and you can’t help but wrap your arms around his neck- pulling him into you. “It would’ve been such a lovely wedding.” You chuckle, and Bucky’s hands rest on your lower back.

“Can picture you in the dress just as clear as day, babydoll. The most gorgeous girl ever, the most perfect girl in the world.” You let out a sob at his words, and then you hear a disturbance from outside. You both pull away and see the wave about seven miles away. The current has already started to splash angrily against the building. “How do you want to do this, doll?” His nose brushes against your cheek, and you sigh. “On the floor.” You mumble, and Bucky nods.

He shifts you two over away from the big window and plops you both down onto the dark, carpeted floor. Your back goes flush against his heaving chest and his arms waste no time in engulfing you, pressing you to him as tight as he possibly can.

Bucky then begins to sway you both back and forth, and your eyes close as you take the very last moments in. You then hear Bucky begin to hum, and your heart aches. Your heart aches because not only is it a sad song, but it’s one you two heard on your second date together in one of Tony’s cars driving to the beach. It was Bucky’s first time listening to it and he fell in love with it. You destined it to be your song.

You wait until he gets to your favorite part of the chorus and start singing in a low tone, “If the world was ending you’d come over, right?……The sky'd be falling and I'd hold you tight.” Bucky’s hold on you grows tighter and you continue to sing as tears run down your cheeks. “And there wouldn't be a reason why…..we would even have to say goodbye.” Both of your hands entangle mid-humming and singing too- Bucky’s fingers twists the ring on your finger out of nerves. Bucky then presses a gentle kiss to the top of your head while he continues to hum- his humming becoming softer. “Just hold me, baby. Hold me for as long as you can.” You mumble, another hot tear slipping down your cheek until it falls from your chin down to your shirt.

“I will sweetheart. I’ll hold you for as long as whoever is up above us will allow.” Neither one of you have any more time to say anything, because the room gets dark, and the sounds of water flood your ears before the water floods into the room, immediately sweeping you two away as if you were never there.

tag list- @sableseb @slutforchrisandseb @bucky-daddy @zealous-whispers-of-us-redux @comfortbucky @vinnies--wife @littlegasps @harrysthiccthighss @moonlightbaby10 @hoodedbirdie @bucky-hues @leeviiieee @imtherain

if you’re crossed out, i couldn’t tag you

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