“the weight of the world is love.
under the burden of
solitude,
under the burden of
dissatisfaction .
the weight we carry is love.
& so,
must rest in the arms
of love at last.
must rest
in the arms
of love”
- allen ginsberg, Howl & Other Poems
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i just heard a quote that has thrown my take on life, “today i am sad, tomorrow who knows?”
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i am afraid if i vanish no one will remember my smell. who will know my favorite candle, who will bury themselves in vanilla in a scent of grief. i am afraid in ten, twenty, 50 years time, i will have not been. who was i, who are we to be so easily forgotten
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i have an obsession with the sky, i look into its vastness, its beauty of colours and wonder if you are as interested in it as i am. or if you are interested in me at all
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when olivia rodrigo said ‘do you know how proud i am you were created, with the courage to unlearn all of the hatred”
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Monday
Wednesday
Today i cried,
I am made of the bones of birds,
I look at the reflection
and hear the sound
of twigs snapping.
One blink and it's gone,
and I see the deception my mind has played.
I am giant,
clumsy,
obtuse.
No wonder i am not loved
- hayley warden, monday
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Monday
Tuesday,
Today i cried,
and my sobs choked me
as silent tears made their way
from such tired eyes
- hayley warden, monday
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love comes in so many forms and i wish i had more than two hands to grasp it with
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“The Full Moon”, Yerkes Observatory
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i’m afraid of getting older
scared i’ll never write anything
worth reading again
that i’ll disappoint the people
who are counting on me
that i’ll never learn how to be happy
that i’ll be broke again one day
that my parents will die
and i’ll be alone in the end
— Rupi Kaur, Home Body
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A series I am creating
Monday:
Yesterday i cried,
for the thought of staying alive
seemed so much harder
than that of such a beautiful peace.
To lay in an ending warmth,
no pain,
no worries
to wash the contempt away.
And to know
that such a place cannot be reached
without imposing this hurt
that wracks my entire soul
and being
onto the people i have loved so fiercely.
To do that would be selfish
and i have been enough of that
already.
My demons walk with me,
hand in hand we stroll
down a path with no end in sight.
- hayley warden
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when ts elliott said “The bed is open; the tooth-brush hangs on the wall,
Put your shoes at the door, sleep, prepare for life. - The last twist of the knife.”, or when he said “ I have seen the moment of my greatness flicker,
And I have seen the eternal Footman hold my coat, and snicker,
And in short, I was afraid.” or when he said “ Do I dare
Disturb the universe?” or
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Half the harm that is done in this world is due to people who want to feel important. They don’t mean to do harm, but the harm (that they cause) does not interest them. Or they do not see it, or they justify it because they are absorbed in the endless struggle to think well of themselves.
T.S. Elliot (via the-courage-to-heal)
I would like to think i am the exact opposite of this. Half of the struggle to think well of myself is absorbed by trying to cause the least amount of harm to others, no matter the damage to myself
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There is nothing I would not do for those who are really my friends. I have no notion of loving people by halves; it is not my nature. My attachments are always excessively strong.
Jane Austen, Northanger Abbey
(via thebookquotes)
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“Deep in my heart I know I am a loner. I have tried to blend in with the world and be sociable, but the more people I meet the more disappointed I am. So, I’ve learned to enjoy myself, my family, and a few good friends.”
— Steven Aitchison
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sometimes i wish for more than this, sometimes the world leaves me yearning for a larger slice whilst other times it tells me i am too full
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