autistic-alice

[autistic-alice]

"I have x diagnosis and I can do y!" Cool but are you going to stand up for the people in your community who genuinely can't or are you going to sacrifice their value and humanity in an attempt at personally escaping the stigma because that's significantly more important than who can do what

[autistic-alice]

This goes out to disabled people who can’t be independent. You are still worthy, valuable and lovable. And you deserve happiness and a fulfilling life. Please don’t let society or anyone else convince you otherwise.

[autistic-alice]

actually, "autism is a huge part of who i am and i'm proud of it" and "autism is a disability that requires accommodations" are both true statements that can and should coexist

[autistic-alice]

the autism mood of never knowing when its “your turn” in a convo so you say the first word of your sentence about 5 times before you actually get to speak

[autistic-alice]

As a child were you the “I’m an alien and I don’t understand human things” neurodivergent or the “I’m not supposed to be here I’m actually supposed to get whisked away to another world where I’m the chosen one” neurodivergent

#I thought I was an alien who had to return to my planet #Also I was an animal trapped in a human body who needed to return #so both I guess??

[autistic-alice]

Every person need to be taught disability history

Not the “oh Einstein was probably autistic” or the sanitized Helen Keller story. but this history disabled people have made and has been made for us.

Teach them about Carrie Buck, who was sterilized against her will, sued in 1927, and lost because “Three generations of imbeciles [were] enough.” (A decision which still has not been reversed)

Teach them about Judith Heumann and her associates, who in 1977, held the longest sit in a government building for the enactment of 504 protection passed three years earlier.

Teach them about all the Baby Does, newborns in 1980s who were born disabled and who doctors and parents left to die without treatment, who’s deaths lead to the passing of The Baby Doe amendment to the child abuse law in 1984.

Teach them about the deaf students at Gallaudet University, a liberal arts school for the deaf, who in 1988, protested the appointment of yet another hearing president and successfully elected I. King Jordan as their first deaf president.

Teach them about Jim Sinclair, who at the 1993 international Autism Conference stood and said “don’t mourn for us. We are alive. We are real. And we’re here waiting for you.”

Teach about the disability activists who laid down in front of buses for accessible transit in 1978, crawled up the steps of congress in 1990 for the ADA, and fight against police brutality, poverty, restricted access to medical care, and abuse today.

Teach about us.

[autistic-alice]

Sometimes my autism makes it difficult or impossible to do some of the things I want to do and I don't think that pain is ever going to go away

[autistic-alice]

[autistic-alice]

I'm getting to go to bed, but I wanted to share something important:

Not all special interests are a good thing.

I don't just mean they're from a problematic source. I mean they can eat up your life. They can contribute to maladaptive daydreaming, they can consume your thoughts in a bad way.

And I'm not talking about a hyperfixation. Mine lasted from the age of 12 until my mid-20s and if I encounter the topic, the feelings rush back and I want to dive into the topic again.

I am positive other mental health issues contribute as these things rarely exist in a vacuum.

But it's important to recognise that sometimes we do actually have to forcibly push away a special interest for our own mental health. It's not always fact collecting. It can become an unhealthy mindset.

Just wanted to put that out there since I'm currently struggling with having come across my own SpIn demon and I'm wrestling with it. And no, I won't chat about what that topic is as it will only increase the bad sensations.

[autistic-alice]

Well I just learned a new upsetting thing about systemic ableism today.

[autistic-alice]

Happy autism awareness month to high needs autistic people. People who use AAC or sign language. People who don't communicate at all. Nonverbal and semi verbal autistics. People who got diagnosed early. People with developmental delays. Autistics who also have intellectual disabilities. Autistics who are also physically disabled. You are an important part of this community. I hope April treats you well.

[autistic-alice]

i can fix him *traumatizes him*

[autistic-alice]

Allistics: if only the poor little autisms could communicate effectively

Autistics: *clearly communicate a boundary*

Allistics: see it's just nonsense no way to understand

[autistic-alice]

I will be expected 

My hands folded in my lap My voice quiet My eyes fixed upon yours Because I know I am the problem to be fixed The unpredictable monster in the corner I am the only one who can fix me Only can I fix my attitude when I am being put down Relegated to fold out tables in the hallway Only I can control myself when I am denied a break Denied a moment to think away from the impossible tasks I am too dumb for The tasks I am too smart for So why do I lag behind I know now I feel the shame etched into every sheet

Ballpoint pen circles around the words 

My right to an education hangs on my ability to be predictable 

My ability to sit still and say yes I am so broken I am a waste of potential I lack discipline I am manipulative I know now I will end up homeless if I can’t master a graph I won’t survive in this world if I don’t learn to shut up

So many bad circles checks and tallies I forget what rewards I get for the impossible task of making competence where there is none

I am unexpected I am complex I am difficult I see that now I know now

#poetry #original poem #stream of conscious writing #actuallyautistic #actually traumatized #actuallytraumatized #actually autistic #school trauma

[autistic-alice]

[autistic-alice]

Mobility aids and sensory aids aren’t a “worst case scenario”

Stop acting like it’s a tragedy when someone starts using a cane or wheelchair, and stop acting like it’s someone admitting defeat if they need ear defenders or stim toys.

Aids are a good thing. They allow us to live better than we could before, and that’s something to celebrate, not demean and be doom and gloom about.

[autistic-alice]

Any ideas on how to start becoming more involved in reconstructionist judaism while not near a synagogue or shul of any kind also also living in a group home?? I can do stuff online just not in person. I am jewish already so their is no need to convert I am just looking for ways to get more involved. I want to be more observant but with a reconstructionist lense. Thank you!! 

#me #jumblr #judaism #jewish