b4st4rd-c4t

[b4st4rd-c4t]

I have nothing to say

Kinda inspired by old outfits of @/the-punk-innovator

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got my hands on a field guide of californian bugs and i found that there's this one bee species in southern california that looks like this

(Actual bugs under the cut, CW for insects)

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~sampughart

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yuri be upon ye..

#aaaaah #(cheering) #i’m literally obsessed

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people ask why i am adamant about stating that i am a gay man and a lesbian, and why i don't just simply state that i am bisexual. while i do that sometimes, it's very important for me to express that no matter how i present, or what space i occupy, i am queer, read as queer, and will never stop experiencing my own personal queerness.

i am never clocked as a heterosexual anything. even when i was a cis passing trans man, i was viewed as a faggot and a butch dyke dating a woman. no part of me has ever been viewed as straight. from childhood i started presenting masc and growing facial hair and bulking up from my intersex condition.

i was always viewed as a butch dyke by my peers, partially because i was not great at hiding the fact that i was attracted to girls, but also because of how masculine i was, both by nature and choice. i have always been a dyke, to the point of my friends' mothers asking their kids about it. when i was dating my FTM exes, we were just two butch dykes to everyone around us.

once i transitioned into manhood, i was instantly clocked as a faggot, and will always be. this is most people's primary reaction to me. i am the stereotypical fag in real life. i walk the walk, and talk the talk. even if i am dating or having sex with a woman, i will still be viewed as a faggot who loves and fucks women. i will be viewed as a butch dyke even if i am identifying and presenting as a woman dating a man. i will always be viewed as a lesbian or a gay man. i will never be viewed as a straight guy, or a straight woman, or a straight genderqueer person.

i am not and never have been a straight anything, so it's well in my rights to clarify that i am a lesbian and a gay man, not a straight something and a gay something. i have the right to say this, because this is what i am, and i don't have to sell myself short. i am allowed to be honest about how i identify, and how i am viewed. it isn't entirely about how i'm viewed, because this is also how i feel. the feeling is mutual. it's alright to say this, if everyone in the situation agrees that's what's going on.

it's alright for me to say i'm bisexual, gay, and a lesbian at the same time, it's just stating the truth. some bi people are gay and straight, some people are gays and lesbians, the world keeps turning.

[b4st4rd-c4t]

We need more butch4butch cowboy media

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i have been trying for like. months to explain how the relationship between butch lesbians and trans men is not something akin to polar opposites and this is all i got. like it's not like this:

it's a venn diagram with a massive overlap in the middle. i'm not saying EVERY butch is a trans guy and EVERY trans guy is a butch dyke , i'm just saying it looks more like this:

these are not "mutually exclusive" terms- they do not mean the same thing, but we can be the same people, an very often are. there is a long history of butches who identify as FTM, trans men, drag kings, genderqueer, genderfluid, transmasculine, male, polygender, and two-spirit lesbians, and so much more. the relationship between lesbianism and queer masculinity is inseparable and the only people telling you that butches and trans men need to violently separate from one another and be at each other's throats are terfs. even if we do not share identities, we share our struggle together as heavily misunderstood and unseen masculine queers.

we stand up for each other when our identities get confused by strangers, and we get misgendered. we stand up for each other when terfs and terfpilled people tell us that transmasculine people and men can't be lesbians, when people say "butches just want to be men", when people say "butches aren't real women", when people call each of us bull dykes and trannies, when people mock the way FTMs walk and talk and look, and when people tell trans men they're "just butch dykes in denial". we stand up for each other and understand each others struggles.

whenever a butch lesbian asserts they're a woman no matter how masc they are, whenever a trans man asserts that they are a man and not a butch, whenever a butch struggles to be seen as both a man and a lesbian, and whenever a trans man returns to the lesbian community while embracing their manhood, we are part of the same community, we share the same struggles, and we owe it to each other to stay strong.

we are not enemies. we are bedfellows, lovers, family, spouses, partners, husbands, wives, brothers, sisters, siblings, friends, each others support networks, even if we don't share identities perfectly. whether you are butch and a woman, butch and a man, butch and something else entirely, a male, ftm, genderfluid, polygender, genderqueer, transmasculine, nonbinary, two-spirit or whatever else you may be lesbian, you are part of our family and your experience is worth being heard.

[b4st4rd-c4t]

butch werewolf rights

now on inprnt!

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doberman femme bulldog butch what’s better than this

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"I think this is my favourite way to touch you" she said lovingly, while gently tracing circle after circle with her nails along my bare back.

"What?"

"Scratching your back, I think it's one of my favourite ways to touch you. That, or playing with your hair."

I post a lot about how stone4stone love has been healing for me in a way that is so profound and almost spiritual, but finally having it in person has only taken that to a whole other level. My darling femme saying this caused my entire world to slow down as I processed what, up until that point, I thought impossible. A fantasy that would never fully be spoken.

For context, my top three favourite ways to be given physical intimacy/love are the following:

Having my hair played with over long periods of time

Scratching my back and scalp

Massage, especially when chronic pain flare ups are bad

I react so intensely that it excites people a lot of the time. You'd think I was having sex if you were simply listening to the sounds from the other room (which is ironic given I actively hate receiving during, joys of being stone). For my entire life, for my nearly 15 years of dating, every single person before my femme has followed the same pattern.

They'll discover how positively I react to scratches/hairplay, and they actively engage in it regularly due to the advent of your new partner enjoying something that much. Inevitably they get bored but will continue because it makes me happy. Eventually though, the novelty fully wears off and the only true way I can get that level of attention is when I explicitly ask for it. I've often gotten sighs followed by "oh alright" as if it's some chore, or worse yet, half sarcastic "if only you made sounds like this during sex". Every single time I'd inevitably start feeling guilty, anxious, and simply stop asking.

The sheer number of times I'd ask myself "if I said I never wanted to receive during sex again, if I wanted intimacy in only this way, would so-n-so be upset" and the answer was always yes. Always. I'd begun to internalize that my way of receiving was a chore. That how I wanted to be loved was a reward to be earned.

Then comes this absolute darling of a femme, unprompted during our quiet night of non-sexual intimacy after a long day, casually dropping that her favourite way to show me physical intimacy is tied between scratching my back and playing with my hair. By accident in a single half-entraced phrase she took my perceptions of love, what I deserve from love, and what I could expect to receive, shattered them into a thousand fragments, and then stitched them back together into a mosaic that would make the Byzantines weep.

There is something to be said for your partner loving you in a specific way because it is how you like to be showed love, even though it's not their preferred method of showing it. It is a league-of-its-own different feeling to find someone who shows you love the way you want to be shown love because it's how they prefer to show love. She has taught me that and I am never settling for less again.

I've said it before, and I'll say it again.

Stone4Stone is Holy.

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I’ve seen so many posts on here lately with people referring to their partner as “my butch” and my heart is literally fluttering from the mere thought of being referred to like that one day.

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Time for an lil Abbi post AKA:

Ty's little cowboy princess

i draw her naked a lot because, i mean look at her

she looks so cute in this one .....meanwhile Ty is being haunted by the narrative

this is cropped as hell because tumblr will not like this full image

I like drawing them as their Big Cat's name sakes

Ty is a Tiger and Abbi is a Tabbi Cat <3

Abbi is what you might call a kitty pet

[b4st4rd-c4t]

Two Elves by John Quincy Adams (Late 19th - Early 20th Century)

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don't use "ftm" it's outdated and offensive. it implies that the trans person was their agab, which we never were. i was always a boy, never a girl who became a boy.

i'm 35 years old. i've been IDing as trans or something similar to trans for nearly 20 years. i was probably calling myself FTM while you were playing tag during recess, anon.

i WAS a girl. i IDed as a girl early in my life. i recognized myself as a girl, called myself a girl, lived as a girl, and was a girl. who then IDed as a man. hence, F t M.

spend more time worrying about yourself instead of strangers on the internet, anon.

sorry not sorry if this comes off as needlessly hostile, but i've been getting a lot of shit from a lot of teenage trans kids about the language i use to describe my own goddamn experience, and i'm growing real fuckin weary of it.

i have elder trans friends who call themselves transsexuals and transvestites and trannies. are you going to seriously go to a 60-year-old trans person who survived the reagan years and tell her she's not allowed to use certain language to describe herself because it might offend the delicate sensibilities of some teenager on the internet?

do yourself a favor and log off, find some real-life trans people who are over the age of 20 or 25, and spend time talking to them instead of getting all holier-than-thou at random strangers on tumblr.

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Y’know what? F*ck you! -rats your omens-

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Lan Wangji’s transition from awkward teen afraid of his feelings to give-no-fucks 30’s after Wei Wuxian returns is truly immaculate, like the person who used to annoy the crap out of him is now hated by everyone except him and as the head of the Wei Wuxian defense squad, his argument is literally “ok but have u considered that he’s hot?”

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Starting like a personal blog I guess just of things that have been bringing me joy.

My plants have been thriving, their new leaves are like so so shiney and it just brings me joy to see that even if the weather has been weird and they don't have the best environment for them, they are thriving. That's how I wanna do it, I gotta start growing new leaves.