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baabyybones · 4 years

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I’ve been struggling with relapsing for a couple of weeks now and it feels tiring. Going back and forth in a triangle of a healthy-ish mindset towards food, bingeing and restricting. I’m tired. I want to lose weight, but I also don’t want food to be the only thought on my mind anymore.

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baabyybones · 4 years

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I’m planning to recover

I hate feeling like this; cold, moody, aggressive and so fixated on calories I snap at someone for eating a slice of my apple because I’ve already tracked the calories for this one fruit. I’m planning to quit this cycle of binging and restricting I’ve been going through for 6 years.

My body is the only home I get and the only one that matters. Taking care of myself doesn’t mean binging on junk food just because I want it either, it means feeding myself enough of healthy, nourishing foods that’ll improve my health and my wellbeing. I will try my best to strive for self-love and health from now on instead of striving to be skinny and consuming as little calories as possible, because those won’t bring me anywhere in the long run.

If you’re reading this somehow, this is a reminder meant for you as well. You will experience genuine happiness someday and trust me, it will not stem from being skinny. Sending love

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baabyybones · 4 years

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happiness is my nightly weighing being less than my morning weighing which happened to me a couple days ago & i wish everyone who reads this something that makes them truly happy (apart from disordered thoughts)

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baabyybones · 4 years

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apparently joaquin phoenix consumed about 500kcals a day to lose 50something pounds in 2-3 months for his role as the joker, here i come pretending to have been casted as the joker myself

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baabyybones · 4 years

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my mum who usually calls me “a bit too chubby” just said that i really lost some weight

boys, girls and everyone in between: WE CELEBRATING

#not pro anything just using tags #pro recovery #please recover if you can #dont report just ignore #pro ana #pro aana #pro mia #pro miiia #anorexia #anorexea #anorexii #bulimia #bulimiz #bulimua #i want to be skinny #i dont want to eat #eating disorder

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baabyybones · 4 years

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I’m always conscious of how I look in a way that is so exhausting

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baabyybones · 4 years

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me, every single day of my life:

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baabyybones · 4 years

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crazy to think that everything i did in the last couple weeks was count calories and cry

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baabyybones · 4 years

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BINGE BLOCK SEAGULLS

reblog to save yourself from binge

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baabyybones · 4 years

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me trying to get rid of my ed for good and recover for the 24th time

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baabyybones · 4 years

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ED stoners where yall at? Need some folks to follow.

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baabyybones · 4 years

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i haven’t weighed myself in five days is this recovery or hell

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baabyybones · 4 years

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Last week I really thought I was ready for starting recovery (for the third time) and made a doctor’s appointment. They called back to reschedule, and it’s now 6 more days during which my motivation for recovering is slowly fading and leading me to think about cancelling the appointment

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baabyybones · 4 years

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our scale’s broken and i’ve been having small anxiety attacks about it

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baabyybones · 4 years

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I just dodged one of the worst cravings I’ve had in a while— I was standing in front of the supermarket shelf, my stomach aching from hunger pains, and considered buying my favourite falafel wrap with 691 calories. I literally picked it up five times and put it down again. But, just to repeat: I dodged 691 calories!! I’ll have a green salad with cucumber slices and balsamic dressing instead, all for 55kcal, when I’m at home. An empty stomach feels so good…

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baabyybones · 4 years

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Yesterday, I basically binged because we had family friends over and I had a little over 1000kcals for the first time in weeks. When I woke up today, I felt sooo bloated (still do) and heavy, and I was in a panic-like state until I weighed myself— I haven’t even gained 1 pound!!!

If I just restrict for 2 days, this won’t even be a small disturbance anymore

#not pro anything just using tags #anorexii #anorexia #anorecic #bulimia #buliima #bullimia #pro ana #pro miiia #skinny #i want to be skinny #weight loss #lose weight #binging #binge #dayafterbinge #ana thoughts

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baabyybones · 5 years

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Me irl

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