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barkinspiders · 6 hours
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we’re just abnormal men. we’re just abhorrent men
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barkinspiders · 6 hours
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barkinspiders · 7 hours
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I wish there were a universal, low-brainpower, nonverbal way to communicate to my friends that says "hey I'm thinking about you but I don't have anything to say, nor do I have the wherewithal for a conversation right now anyway" via text message but I'm so so so upset that the original Facebook messenger Poke feature was the closest to anyone getting the right idea
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barkinspiders · 8 hours
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dont let people tell u ur attraction to fire is "abnormal" or "hazardous" prometheus doesnt have his liver eaten every day for u to ignore the allure of arson
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barkinspiders · 8 hours
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I think we should have a turn of phrase for "I'm not in the right, but I AM annoyed with this situation, so I just need to go bitch to a friend about this before I suck it up and go do the right thing" because more and more I'm finding this is a critical element of functional adulthood.
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barkinspiders · 8 hours
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it's always bad for adults to interact with minors, which is why when I was born my mother was positioned at the window and I was birthed down a giant slip n slide that safely transported me to the hospital grounds, where I was quickly accepted and raised by a gang of feral babies who were born under similar circumstances. and that's why my posts are so bad
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barkinspiders · 8 hours
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bass makes a dollar. i make a dime. that's why i think about lesbian sex on company time
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barkinspiders · 8 hours
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Sorry I'm going to be more normal about him
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barkinspiders · 8 hours
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barkinspiders · 8 hours
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do u ever think about them
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barkinspiders · 8 hours
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barkinspiders · 13 hours
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LET HIM IN THE HOT DOG STORE LET HIM IN THE HOT DOG STORE
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barkinspiders · 13 hours
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ive forgotten the origin of "she blank on my blank til i blank" and i dont even begin to know how to look it up
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barkinspiders · 13 hours
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whotever… im donot have to listen to anybody
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barkinspiders · 14 hours
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Every time I see some moral panic article about how some alarming % of teens admit to vaping or smoking or doing drugs or whatever, I think about that time in 9th grade when school handed us a survey on substance use, told us we had to fill it out, and me and a half dozen friends reported that we’d been habitual users of heroin, cocaine, and acid since the age of 9.
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barkinspiders · 14 hours
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Gordon Ramsey fursona reveal!
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barkinspiders · 14 hours
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(whispering to the flight attendant) fantastic... very helpful. i've noticed you're wearing the same clothing as several other people... why is that
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