I love how you watch btvs and think Angel is this cool mysterious guy and then you watch ats and realise oh. no this is just an old dude with depression and debilitating social anxiety
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The first few episodes of Angel s1 consist of the three mains taking turns going “damn bitch, you live like this?” to each other, in both the physical and metaphorical sense, and I think that’s a beautiful expression of friendship
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I love how Spike and Dawn have managed to convince themselves they’re committing Delinquency when in fact they are literally huddles in the dark by a pink unicorn candle and are reading somebody else’s diary and gossiping and eating chocolate. This is very obviously a slumber party.
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endless list of favorite buffy & willow scenes: ➸ [4/∞]
↳ “I just don’t like putting you guys in danger.”
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A mostly silent episode. Joss Whedon, you genius. There’s a whole 27 minutes with no speaking whatsoever, the Gentlemen are freaky as shit and the episode received an Emmy nomination for Outstanding Writing in a Drama Series. (Rightfully so.) “Hush” was a reaction to criticism that ‘Buffy’ relied too heavily on snappy dialogue. And man, what a reaction it was. Suck on that, critics. (via The 5 Best ‘Buffy The Vampire Slayer’ Episodes | Thought Catalog)
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Maudlin
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basically, if season six is about collapse, then season seven is about the consequences of rebuilding without understanding what went wrong. season seven is not really about healing, so much as realizing how rotten a foundation had to be for things to fall apart in the first place. it’s like if season six is the breakdown, then seven is the decade of therapy and fucking up that follows. deconstructive versus reconstructive fucking up.
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One of my favorite things about Family (there are obviously many things I love about Family) is that it kind of acknowledges that Buffy barely knows Tara at that point. Like, she and Xander have that scene where they talk about how unfamiliar they are with her, and Buffy seems straight up disinterested. She basically says that she has more important things to worry about than Tara’s Birthday.
And then the final scene in the Magic Box happens, and Buffy sees Tara, sees her awful, abusive family, and basically decides that Tara is one of her people, and nobody messes with Buffy’s people.
Anyway, I recently rewatched season one, and I think that this like a thing that Buffy does. Like, the first time she sees Willow, Cordelia is making fun of her, and Buffy goes over to her and she’s like, “guess what, we’re friends now.” And Willow doesn’t really know what to make of it, like she’s confused at the idea that Buffy would want to hang out with her, but Buffy has pretty much already adopted her. Or in the episode before Family, where Buffy finds out Dawn is the Key. I’ve always considered that the episode where Buffy and Dawn truly became sisters. Buffy realizes that her memories of Dawn, and by extension her feelings towards her, the love that she feels for her sister, are fabricated - they aren’t hers. But in that episode she chooses to love Dawn regardless, chooses to be her sister for the first time.
Idk, maybe this is kind of obvious. Like, no shit, a chosen family is chosen. But it’s interesting to me how deliberate Buffy can be with stuff like that. In Family, she is completely self-aware that this is what she’s doing: she calls Tara family, despite barely knowing her, because she’s chosen her, and that’s enough. Buffy decides to love people, and when she does, she loves them unconditionally.
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What do you think happened during buffy x angel meet up in s6?
This is a really interesting question to me.
The main clues we get about the encounter are Buffy saying it was “intense” and seeing Angel and Buffy seek comfort food when they return home.
Seeing as Angel has actually been to hell, I don’t think Buffy pretended she was there. I tend to think she avoided the topic of where she’d been in typical Buffy fashion. Buffy and Angel always had communication problems, with both of them being the type to hold back and therefore not being able to persuade the other to open up. Cordelia and Spike are very different in personality (and much more open) and therefore push past Angel and Buffy’s barriers. The relationship Buffy holds with Spike throughout season six makes me believe he’s the only one who knows her secret.
I think Buffy left the encounter feeling just one more stack of suck in her pile up of problems. She wants to take comfort in Angel but there’s only so far she can go. Angel didn’t bring her back and therefore wouldn’t feel guilty if she told him the truth, but she knows Angel would want to help her and that’s too dangerous for the both of them. Angel, of course, senses the change and unhappiness in Buffy but being Angel doesn’t know what to do about it. Once again he realizes Buffy’s problems aren’t his problems–they can’t be. And when he sees her in this amount of pain I think that’s really, really hard for him. Harder than letting her go when he thinks she has a chance at a happy life.
I think they both left the encounter feeling unsatisfied. There’s a lot of intense emotion between them but this huge wall. Buffy usually bears this with resignation, but when she’s feeling this low I think it’s harder for her, and for Angel because he knows it’s his fault he can’t get close enough to help. I also think this is when he realizes that he will always feel this way about Buffy, not even death can change it, and it’s just something he’ll carry with him.
In summary, I think Angel felt the wall that everyone is hitting with Buffy at this time, and he tried in his clumsy way to break through but couldn’t. Finally all he does is hold her until she has to go, with a million unsaid things between them.
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