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caesurables · 2 months

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[CN] Li Zeyan’s Mundane Date (Eng Translation)

“I bet that you will still remember this day, this moment, even decades from now. Just like I will.”

⌚Warning⌚ This post contains detailed spoilers for a date, 琐碎约会, that is yet to be released on the global server! ♡

•─────⋅◍♡◍⋅─────•

【Chapter 1】

Big Screen: “In order to welcome this festival dedicated to love, our channel is presenting a special program named 《The Vow at Fingertip》.”

Big Screen: “We’ve collected a plethora of stories about the ring, exploring its deeper meaning beyond the ceremonial contexts…”

It’s early morning on Valentine’s Day, and the streets are already bustling with noise and excitement. Li Zeyan and I stand quietly at the entrance of the supermarket, watching the program previews displayed on the shopping mall’s large screen.

LZY: [laughs like a proud s/o ✊] Well, this is quite impressive. The prime spot throughout the whole day is going to be occupied by your show.

MC: Granted, it’s thanks to the sponsorship from the brand, but I’m really satisfied with this show.

LZY: In that case, let’s get through the checklist quickly and head back early to enjoy your masterpiece.

Finishing his words, he then takes my hand and leads me into the supermarket.

Given Li Zeyan’s personality, he had actually prepared the ingredients at Souvenir well in advance. But due to a phone call this morning, we had no choice but to make last-minute changes in our plans…

–

───── [FLASHBACK STARTS] ─────

Mr. Mills: Manager, sorry to trouble you so early in the morning.

Mr. Mills: While I was out for a walk just now, I saw a notice posted on the door of Souvenir stating that there’s a circuit malfunction in this area and the power has been out for the whole night.

Mr. Mills: I checked the refrigerator, and it seems those ingredients of yours may have gone bad.

LZY: [his voice really tends to drop to a different softness when he talks to Mr. Mills 🥺] Thank you for taking the trouble. I’ll take care of it later.

Mr. Mills: But you prepared these for MC, right? Would you still be able to work out your plans for today?

Li Zeyan glances at me, who’s peering over from beside him, and a small smile tugs at the corners of his lips.

LZY: [while looking at you] You don’t have to worry. I have a compensation plan in mind.

Watching as Li Zeyan ends the call, his expression composed, I hurriedly lean in and ask him about the situation.

MC: Did something happen at Souvenir? Should we go to the restaurant first and check it out?

LZY: It’s alright, let’s celebrate the festival first.

LZY: The menu won’t change, but we need to grab a few things to make up. I’ll make a quick trip to the supermarket later.

MC: I’ll come along with you!

–

───── [FLASHBACK ENDS] ─────

As each item from the list is placed into the shopping cart, I steal glances at Li Zeyan and study his completely unruffled expression, inwardly sighing to myself.

His plan fell through, and it even resulted in some damage. Yet, he hasn’t uttered a single word of complaint, appearing to have a well-thought-out plan in advance as always.

MC: [muttering] He certainly deserves the title of being the number one in emotional stability.

Li Zeyan seems to have heard my mumbling, prompting him to turn around and meet my gaze.

LZY: What’s the matter? Why are you zoning out?

MC: I was thinking, you are really good at switching your mood. If I were in your shoes and found out [MC’s Company Name] had run into some problem, I’d spend half a day just feeling upset.

LZY: Not like it’s something that can’t be remedied. What’s there to feel upset about?

LZY: It’s a nice holiday, and I don’t wish to see a certain dummy shooting her mouth off to the sky.

He gently lays his hand on top of mine and, together with the shopping cart, leads me forward.

LZY: If you zone out again, we won’t go to the snack section.

MC: I absolutely won’t! Let’s go, let’s go~

—

•─────⋅◍♡◍⋅─────•

—

【Chapter 2】

The warm music of the show flows through the room, but it’s soon drowned out by the clinking and clattering sounds from the kitchen.

MC: Is there anything else you need me to do, Boss?

LZY: Help me with the sauce.

In order to increase efficiency, I volunteer to help Li Zeyan and find myself busy following his instructions, frantically running around in circles.

LZY: Pass me the thermometer.

LZY: Set the stopwatch to one minute for me.

MC: Roger!

Ding––

The oven’s timer sounds, and I consciously put on the heat-resistant gloves and pull out the baking tray.

MC: Isn’t it time to turn the sweet potato tart?

LZY: Right. If it’s tricky to turn, try lifting a corner first to test it out.

MC: Uh… it does seem a bit tricky to flip.

With gentleness and cautiousness, I proceed to operate, afraid of ruining the shape Li Zeyan has crafted so meticulously.

As I reach the last three, a reminder sounds from behind me.

LZY: Turn them faster; don’t let the oven temperature drop too much.

LZY: Don’t worry so much about the shape. For a dummy, it’s tasting delicious is what matters more.

His voice, carrying with it a smile, alleviates my nervousness a little. I turn them over and slide the baking tray back into the oven.

With the oven resuming its operation, I breathe a sigh of relief and walk back to Li Zeyan’s side, taking a sip of water.

LZY: [laughs softly] Tired?

MC: How could I be tired? I can handle this amount of work just fine.

MC: It actually feels like that cooking game we played before. Though, I wish we could have three heads and six arms… [1]

MC: Speaking of which, do things get this chaotic when you cook by yourself?

Li Zeyan puts the lid on the pot and turns down the heat, then rubs my head with his free hand.

LZY: It doesn’t seem as chaotic when I’m on my own without anyone “helping out.”

LZY: But my sous chef here has made quite a lot of progress; at least nothing got messed up.

MC: That’s because my boyfriend doesn’t only cook incredibly well, but he is also a generous mentor!

LZY: [chuckles teasingly] I was here simply trying to better the food I cook for a certain dummy. I did not realize she was secretly taking notes.

LZY: Since you’ve been learning well, tell me, what do we need to add when we take the lid off?

I freeze for a moment, not expecting that he’d really ask questions. Resorting to thinking on my feet, I quickly pounce on him and lock my arms around his neck.

MC: Well, naturally… adding a little extra love would make it even better!

I plant a kiss on his cheek, then swiftly dash away before he can react, turning up the volume of the show.

LZY: [laughs helplessly] Running away when you can’t answer, huh?

MC: [giggling gleefully] What did you say? The music is too loud, I can’t hear you clearly~

Shamelessly feigning ignorance, I stand in front of the TV, grinning while casually casting a glance at the progress of the show.

At this moment, the interview with a young couple begins. The girl raises her left hand towards the camera, showing off her wedding ring.

Girl (on the show): On the day my husband proposed, he hid the ring in a dessert, saying that the dessert that day was infused with a unique formula of love.

Girl (on the show): As a result, when I took a bite, I chomped directly into this “formula of love” and ended up breaking my tooth…

Girl (on the show): We had to rush to the emergency room in the middle of the night. The pain was so excruciating that I almost refused the marriage proposal right then and there.

MC: Pfft…

I can’t hold back my laughter and glance over at Li Zeyan, who’s just a short distance away.

MC: Did you hear that, restaurant manager? You should take this as a cautionary tale.

LZY: [chuckles helplessly] It’s clearly the gluttonous dummy who should take this as a cautionary tale.

Just as I’m about to retaliate, the doorbell suddenly rings. I pull a face at Li Zeyan and hurry off to answer the door.

Delivery Guy: Excuse me, is this Mr. Li’s residence? I’ve got a Flash Delivery package for him.

I accept the rather sizable cardboard box, then curiously glance towards the kitchen.

MC: What did you order?

LZY: Why don’t you open it and find out?

I carefully open the box and find an unexpected item inside––

──────────────

[Tidbits]:

[1] It’s a reference to Li Zeyan’s “Home Visit Date!”

—

•─────⋅◍♡◍⋅─────•

—

【Chapter 3】

MC: “Chocolate fountain machine for home use”?

As I look at the name on the instruction manual, I read it out loud in surprise.

The supermarket’s holiday chocolates are already vying for attention with their romantic beauty, but I didn’t expect Li Zeyan to have an even more surprising design up his sleeves.

MC: Wow… isn’t this something you’d usually find only at hotels or fancy gatherings?

LZY: Mm-hmm. Given the unusual circumstances today, I’d have to slack off for now.

MC: “Slack off”?

Li Zeyan meets my puzzled gaze and places the machine on the table, then proceeds to gesticulate the patterns of the fountain.

LZY: Since it’s liquid, it simplifies the project by skipping several steps and can’t be stored. Once prepared, it’s only enough for a single serving.

LZY: If a certain someone has any objections, I’ll make a better one for you another day.

MC: Not only do I have no objections, but I also want to “redress injustices” on behalf of the chocolate fountain.

I wedge myself between him and the bar counter, pretending to be angry as I place my hands on my hips.

MC: How could you ever consider something as amusing and creative as this chocolate fountain as “slacking off”?!

MC: Moreover, regardless of how simple the procedure may be, Restaurant Manager Li’s creations are always one-of-a-kind.

Li Zeyan gives me a look and curls his lips into a smile.

LZY: Seems like this choice has turned out to be exactly something a certain someone would’ve liked. Since you’re so interested, why don’t you join me in making it later?

–

The “home version” of the Valentine’s Day feast still lives up to Li Zeyan’s high standards. After having our fill of eating and drinking, we finally bring the chocolate fountain to the table.

I skewer a strawberry, coat it with chocolate sauce, and take a bite. The rich aroma of chocolate blends harmoniously with the strawberry’s fresh sweetness, causing me to squint my eyes as if I were in paradise.

MC: So, so yummy!

LZY: Easy there; be careful not to let the chocolate sauce drip onto you.

Li Zeyan fetches a sheet of paper and places it on my lap, then takes a toothpick to help me skewer the strawberries.

A warmth blooms in my heart. I lean in and hug his arm.

MC: Every dish today has been a hit, plus there’s also a certain handsome guy winning over with his attentive service. I think I ought to give it at least a four-star Michelin rating.

LZY: Is that extra star a reward for yourself?

MC: Hehe, didn’t you just say earlier that your little sous chef did a good job today?

LZY: Indeed, and the dining experience was neater than usual, too.

MC: Those who are capable do the most work, and those who work most deserve extra serving at the table! [2]

Li Zeyan smiles as he listens to my nonsense and pushes a plate of chocolate-coated strawberries in front of me.

LZY: [the indulgence hhh] Alright, “capable one,” today you’re allowed to have a little extra.

MC: Why are you giving them all to me? Aren’t you going to have a taste?

LZY: There’s a certain dummy who’s been looking forward to this for so long, so let’s let her have her fill first.

As I take another bite of a strawberry, I keep pondering which words to persuade him to taste it. When I look up, I find that Li Zeyan has had his eyes fixed on me the whole time.

MC: What’s wrong?

LZY: It’s nothing.

LZY: I was just thinking, with the sudden change of plans today, are you genuinely okay with it?

MC: It wasn’t something within our control. Besides, just the location got changed, that’s all.

LZY: But it did eat into our time, and we missed the beginning of your show.

MC: I didn’t realize CEO Li was looking forward to my show this much, huh?

LZY: [laughs helplessly] I wonder who kept promoting it non-stop next to my ear every day.

Grinning, I lean sideways onto his shoulder and reach out to poke his cheek.

MC: You somehow pulled off such a complicated feast to make up for it. What could I have to be dissatisfied with?

MC: Besides, the most important thing today is to be glued to the person you like; it doesn’t matter even if the time hasn’t been used efficiently.

Picking up the dessert tray, I skewer a strawberry and feed it to him.

MC: In order to make you truly understand how I feel, I warmly invite you to taste the flavor of bliss for yourself. [3]

LZY: Dummy, you’ve already mentioned the “taste of bliss” at least five times today.

LZY: Why do I get the feeling that you always seem to find “bliss” in everything you eat?

MC: That conclusion seems to be a bit of a sweeping generalization.

MC: There may be an abundance of delicious food in the world, but there are only two kinds that can truly bring me a sense of bliss.

MC: Home-cooked meals made by family members and the food you prepare with love.

Li Zeyan takes the plate and gently holds my now-empty hand.

LZY: Was your father very skilled in the kitchen?

MC: He…

MC: He was too busy with work, so there weren’t many opportunities for him to showcase his skills… but the flavors in my memory are very warm; it was the taste of home.

LZY: No wonder a certain someone has a good palette; apparently, she was nurtured well since childhood.

MC: Hehe, but I believe happiness doesn’t just stem from the flavors; the particulars are crucial, too.

LZY: What do you mean?

MC: For example, when Dad came home late from work and would accidentally add too much salt to the quick dishes he prepared, we’d end up laughing it off together during the meal.

MC: For instance, when a certain someone’s own plans went awry, he still prioritized taking care of my feelings.

MC: Like when that certain person could have simply settled for making regular chocolate, but instead, he went out of his way to design a chocolate fountain.

MC: I’m not someone who eats anything at any place without preference. Restaurant Manager Li, please don’t get the wrong idea.

I wink at Li Zeyan. He stares at me for a while, then suddenly breaks the silence.

LZY: Do you know why Souvenir always gives you special privileges?

MC: Why?

LZY: Because while a certain person isn’t very skilled in cooking, she sure is an excellent eater, and she equally excels at “paying the debt for the free meals with her words.” [4]

MC: Nonsense! That’s called showing gratitude, alright!

Unwilling to back down, I stuff another strawberry into his mouth, blocking any potential retort.

MC: Some people’s sweet words don’t last more than three seconds. As punishment, I’ll make you eat more chocolate to make amends.

LZY: [laughs helplessly] …Dummy.

──────────────

[Tidbits]:

[2] The original sentence said by MC here was “能者多劳, 劳者多吃!” The first part of it is actually an idiom: lit. meaning, “it’s the most capable people who do the most work.” The idiom is intended as consolation for the overworked, or flattery when making a request etc. The second part is a word-play on the idiom, so I tweaked the translation to fit the play here!

[3] The term MC uses here is “幸福,” and I had to sit on this one for a while to use a term that is not too wordy but still carries a closer meaning to the CN term. While it essentially does refer to “happiness,” the term carries a deeper connotation than 开心 (happy) / 快乐 (joyful), which refer to short bursts of bright emotions. Whereas “幸福” refers to lasting, fulfilling happiness and holistic contentment~

[4] The term Li Zeyan uses here is “吃人嘴短,” which he’s cleverly re-generated from the proverb “吃人嘴软, 拿人手短” to get his message across efficiently. I’m just too tired to explain the inside joke here LOL, so I opted for a wordy translation to try to get the message across nonetheless.

—

•─────⋅◍♡◍⋅─────•

—

【Chapter 4】

Host: Auntie, how do you usually store your ring?

Granny: Store it? I’ve never taken it off. I keep it on even when I’m working.

Granny: In our generation, we didn’t fuss over all those things. Besides, life inevitably keeps throwing urgent matters at you, so there’s little to no time to ponder over such matters.

While listening to the conversation on TV, I hand the last plate on the table to Li Zeyan.

After a quick rinse, he loads the plates into the dishwasher. Just as he straightens up, I hug him from behind.

MC: We just finished eating; why not rest for a while?

LZY: [chuckles indulgently] What? Are you saying eating can tire you out, dummy?

MC: …don’t you feel a bit sluggish after eating too much?

LZY: [that indulgent tone intensifies x10] No wonder I feel like I’m carrying extra weight on my back.

Hearing the obvious laughter in his voice, I let out a couple of “hmphs” and continue to lean against his back without a care in the world.

LZY: A certain someone here has eaten her plate clean so thoroughly, lightening the load quite a lot, so this shouldn’t take too much time.

MC: That’s an essential skill for a Souvenir diner! But every time I see you being so diligent, I feel a tad embarrassed.

MC: It’s one thing not to procrastinate at work, but how can you not be lazy in your everyday life as well?

LZY: Wouldn’t it be more of a hassle if everything piled up at once?

LZY: Taking care of things immediately when they happen also helps avoid any unexpected complications.

Thinking back to how he methodically rearranged everything this morning, I can’t help but sigh with a twinge of envy.

MC: I’m so lucky to have you around; it’s what could make today so delightful.

LZY: Even after having to do so much work, you still consider it delightful?

MC: Yep! Cooking with you is like playing a game, but without the need to worry about failing any levels!

LZY: Dummy has a knack for turning any place into an amusement park.

MC: Then you’re the amusement park manager!

Li Zeyan finishes washing his hands, turns around, and boops the tip of my nose.

LZY: [in the softest of tones] It seems that with you around, I’ll never have to worry about being unemployed.

LZY: Let’s go. Let’s focus on watching your show.

—

Li Zeyan pulls me to nestle into the couch. The show has now reached the interview segment, and the host is asking the elderly woman about the happiest moment of her life in the decades that have gone by.

Granny: If I had to choose one, it would be one night before going to sleep, when my husband touched the ring on my hand and said, “It’s all scratched up.”

Granny: When we calculated, we realized we’ve been wearing our rings for several decades.

Host: Those rings must be bearing many traces of life, wouldn’t you say?

Granny: Yes, that’s right. At first, I wanted to reprimand him, to show him how much work I’ve done. But then I touched his ring, and it was just the same.

Granny: At that moment, I suddenly felt, this person next to me has been by my side for a very long time.

I snuggle into Li Zeyan’s embrace, intertwining my fingers with his and stroking them.

MC: If it were the two of us, your ring would definitely be the one to wear out first.

LZY: Not necessarily; we also have to take into account a certain someone stirring up trouble and acting silly.

MC: Perhaps in a few decades, I’ll have grown smarter already!

LZY: Then let’s make a bet. We’ll see if you still remember this statement in a few decades.

MC: Alright, you’re on. But we’re both in this, so it wouldn’t be fair to put only me to the test.

LZY: Go on, what plan are you hatching now?

I roll my eyes and wriggle out of his arms.

MC: You watch the show; I’ll be back in a jiffy.

I trot over to the pantry and open one of the low cabinets. Owing to the Valentine’s Day themed program, I have received quite a few chocolates from our collaborators.

I take out the heart-shaped box placed at the top and return to Li Zeyan’s side.

–

MC: Li Zeyan, I have a small gift for you.

LZY: What, haven’t had enough chocolate yet?

Li Zeyan glances at the box in my hand, then raises an eyebrow at me. I smile but don’t say anything, opening the box and putting it into his hand.

MC: Hold on~ Let me do a magic trick for you first.

MC: Close your eyes, and then just pick any chocolate from inside.

LZY: [gentle, helpless chuckle] What kind of stunt are you pulling this time?

Despite saying this, Li Zeyan still closes his eyes and follows suit. I take the chocolate he hands me and gently tear open the wrapper.

The golden foil paper is extremely delicate and prone to tearing if handled with even the slightest bit of carelessness. But by now, I’ve already become skilled enough to roll it up smoothly.

During the filming of this show, chocolate almost became our only snack. Every time I was on the phone with Li Zeyan, I would chat with him while casually rolling the candy wrappers.

I didn’t expect the “practice makes perfect” proverb to come to fruition like this, but inadvertently, I managed to craft this paper “ring.”

MC: Done! Now, extend your hand again.

He doesn’t seem to quite understand what my intention is, so he reaches into the box for another chocolate and hands it to me.

Seeing him so cooperative, I can’t help but laugh out loud, giving his fingertips a squeeze as I hold up the “ring” I have just created.

MC: You can open your eyes now!

–

LZY: …?

Li Zeyan looks at the small ring in my hand and blinks slowly.

LZY: [YOU CAN LITERALLY HEAR IN HIS TONE THAT HE’S CAUGHT OFF GUARD 🥹] This is…?

MC: As you can see, an exclusively customized ring from 24-karat pure gold!

MC: Handcrafted from start to finish, Mr. Li Zeyan is the only one in the world who has the opportunity to own it.

Li Zeyan is momentarily taken aback, then glances at the torn-open chocolates on the table, before suddenly breaking into a smile.

LZY: Even such a brief moment as this is ample for your creativity to soar.

MC: I’ve been planning this for a long time. You can’t just whip up such a rare ring on the spot.

MC: Since you’ve made that bet with me, I must also reciprocate.

I straighten up and slowly slide the small ring onto his ring finger.

Li Zeyan’s gaze also remains fixated on my fingertips until the ring moves past his second joint, then he lifts his eyes to stare at me again.

Under the sunlight, those deep, enigmatic eyes of his shine even brighter, an expectation as clear as crystals surging within them.

I gaze fixedly at him, his cheeks now tinged with a gentle blush, and find myself unable to suppress the smile that steals across my lips.

MC: I bet that you will still remember this day, this moment, even decades from now.

MC: Just like I will.

After a few seconds of silence, Li Zeyan tosses the chocolate in his hand aside and tightly clasps my hand with his broad palm.

Seeing that he still hasn’t said anything, I press on and ask once more.

MC: How about it? Do you want to make this bet with me?

LZY: Sure, but…

Even before the words have fully left his mouth, a sudden force on my wrist yanks me towards him. I can’t help but cry out in surprise, only to find myself falling into his arms.

A warm breath immediately envelopes me as he locks me firmly in his arms, and I find myself slowly consumed by an intense yearning.

LZY: [nearly breathless] If you want me to remember, you’ll have to up the ante.

Without waiting for me to respond, he continues kissing me, effortlessly subduing any possible protest I could have.

Even after all this time, he still kisses me with the same uninhibited passion as he did the first time. The distant time and unspoken words all melt away in the gentle caress. [5]

The sound from the television gradually fades away, and the stories of others drift beyond my consciousness.

Even without this bet, I would find it impossible to forget this moment.

After who knows how long has passed, Li Zeyan gently releases me, lowering his head to rest his forehead against mine.

I look into his eyes, so close and within reach, and feel a surge of emotion in my heart.

MC: Li Zeyan.

LZY: Hm?

MC: Will you–– [6]

Before I can say anything further, he promptly raises his hand to cover my mouth.

LZY: [HIS PANICKED TONE HHHH] Wait.

LZY: I’ve accepted the world’s most creative ring, but please don’t say anything more.

LZY: This is something that I should be the one to take care of.

I pause for a moment, then quickly understand what he meant, unable to suppress a laugh as I hold onto his hand.

LZY: Why are you laughing?

MC: Hahaha, although I really don’t want to spoil the atmosphere, but actually, I wanted to ask––

MC: Li Zeyan, will you wear this ring to work?~ ^^

───────────────

[Tidbits]

[5] Unnecessary, really, but still a refresher– it’s the callback to his first kiss aka “Dazzling Date.”

[6] Although obvious from Li Zeyan’s reaction, I still wanna clarify– he cut MC off when she had only gotten to “你愿不愿意—” (will you/ would you be willing to)-- and the rest of that sentence typically is “(will you) marry me” (你愿不愿意嫁给我吗), which is why LZY doesn’t even take any chances and goes, “nope not happening, I wanna do it” 😂❤️

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【Personal Ramblings】

Remainder of One’s Life Date: here!

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caesurables · 3 months

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[Art] Afterglow

Artist: 咸DOOOOOR || Source: ♡

⌚ Papergames commissioned the artist for Love and Producer’s upcoming Valentine’s event ⌚

—

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caesurables · 3 months

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"In the eternal time, you are my eternity"

#mica draws #mlqc #mr love queen's choice #mr love mobile #恋与制作人 #victor li #李泽言 #HBD Victor #恋プロ #ゼン #ゼンのお誕生日 #李泽言0113生日快乐

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caesurables · 4 months

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[CN] Li Zeyan’s Metropolis Date (Eng Translation)

⌚Warning⌚ This post contains detailed spoilers for a date, 都会之约, that is yet to be released on the global server! ♡

[Translation under the cut]

•─────⋅◍♡◍⋅─────•

【Subbed Video】

youtube

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【Important Notes】

some of you might already know this, especially those of you who follow my translations, but still gonna explain since it’s the pivotal point of this date 🤭

The term “哥哥” (gēge) literally translates to “elder brother”, you might be more familiar with the Korean or Japanese alternatives of this term (oppa/ onii-chan). if not used to address your own elder brother, you wouldn’t dare to use it with just anyone – so, when a Chinese girl addresses a boy as her “gege”, she’d use it to address sb she has a very close/ intimate relationship with, address her boyfriend, or take the leap and address a guy she has a crush on to be cutesy LOL. which is why the use of “gege” in this date is so multifaceted — the term which was initially used as a courtesy becomes a “barrier” in fear of being “friend-zoned”, but makes come back in the parts when used by MC’s friends to tease her or when MC hesitates to address him as “gege” in private b/c of the crush connotation haha.

✦ the use of “gege” with the connotation of boyfriend/ crush prevails in the canon verse too, MC used to address Li Zeyan by this term when they were little and after the first comeback, we’ve had MC use this term many times in the past years: ♡

setting and timeline:

the present day story takes place in New York, around 1925/27, and before the great depression (1929).

──────────────────────────────────────────────────

【Chapter 1】

Hubbubs of laughter intermittently resonate from the stretch convertible as it glides through the night, weaving through the distant and nearby lights before coming to a halt in the front courtyard of the mansion.

Myself and a few female friends of mine, slightly tipsy and carrying a faint scent of alcohol, support the ornate headpieces wobbling on our heads as we step down from the car, laughing and playfully nudging one another.

Female Friend: Can you believe Jennifer actually invited that actor! Seriously, when our eyes met, I was practically drowning in those eyes; I didn’t even hear a word he said…

Thinking back to that man whose words were dripped with flattery, I lazily let out a yawn.

MC: Enough, Louise. Perhaps your brain is just filtering out those unpleasant bits of news, you know?

MC: He should thank his lucky stars for starring in a silent movie; otherwise, no one would buy into his performance.

MC: If it weren’t for Jennifer, the editor-in-chief, insisting, I wouldn’t even want to mention his name in the article chronicling tonight’s nightlife… it’s just a waste of space for another line.

Amidst the laughter of the girls, I suddenly seem to feel a certain gaze on me. I stop talking and turn my eyes in the direction of home. Sure enough, I spot a familiar figure.

With one hand resting on the marble railing of the terrace, Li Zeyan looks in my direction, his eyes lowered. The light outlines his physique, carving out a slender silhouette.

Through the thick darkness of the night, those somber eyes lock with mine for a moment. Then, he turns and walks into the villa.

Female Friend: Would you look at that, your old-fashioned gege is still awake at this hour… Could he be waiting for you?

I receive a teasing elbow nudge from my friend, but I offer no retort.

“Old-fashioned.” That term does seem to match him quite well.

In this era where there is never any shortage of merrymaking, he rarely makes appearances at gatherings like banquets and social clubs.

Tonight, before heading out, I asked him if he would like to accompany me, and unsurprisingly, I was met with a rejection.

—

───── [FLASHBACK STARTS] ─────

LZY: No, I have no intention of attending.

LZY: It’s not that I have any other rendezvous to make an appearance at, but I do have more pressing matters to take care of.

LZY: You go ahead, but don’t stay out too late.

───── [FLASHBACK ENDS] ─────

—

Perhaps he does have something else he’s really eager to pursue, or perhaps he simply wants to steer clear of certain people… who knows?

Reflecting on the unexplained decrease in our interactions since becoming adults, a hint of melancholy suddenly settles into my heart. I press my lips together, incline my head, and speak nonchalantly as if unaffected.

MC: [blushing] It isn’t something worth caring about, is it? Anyway, he’s not my “real gege”...

──────────

Creak—

The sound of the gate slowly being pushed open rings out in my ears. I turn my head and see Li Zeyan behind the door, quietly arching an eyebrow. Undoubtedly, he has heard what I just said.

A flicker of guilt passes through me. Aware of my companions’ fixed gazes behind me, I walk into the house with my chest held high, close the door behind me, and walk past Li Zeyan.

LZY: Had a good time?

MC: Oh, it was pretty good… the atmosphere at the whole banquet was quite lively.

MC: Jennifer also showed us the new gemstone she recently bought. It was so… sparkling!

I nonchalantly remove my gloves and fling them onto the sofa, envy in my eyes as I raise my hands to gesture an approximate size in front of Li Zeyan. A light chuckle reaches my ears.

LZY: If you fancy it, you can expect to receive an even finer one in the future.

MC: [blushing] I wish, but the qualities of the gemstones in New York in recent times have been really unappealing.

Li Zeyan’s eyes travel over my absent-mindedly pursed lips, but he doesn’t comment on anything. Instead, he simply taps his fingertips on the staircase railing rhythmically.

The air lapses into silence again, with only the swaying shadows of the trees playing on the floor of the hall. I stifle a yawn and walk past him as if nothing has happened.

MC: Alright, I’m going to go and hit the hay in my room. Tomorrow, there’s still…

LZY: MC.

Suddenly, a low whisper reaches my ears from behind. My hand gripping the railing pauses, and I stand on the stairs, turning to look back at Li Zeyan.

His intense gaze bores deep into me, and the emotions in his deep-set eyes appear more complex and difficult to discern than at any time in the past. After a moment, he finally speaks.

LZY: There’s something I believe I need to tell you.

LZY: Next week, I’ll be moving away from home.

MC: …

My lips part, and my heart suddenly pauses for one beat. My eyes wander over his face, trying to find any hint of jest in his words.

Did he say this in a fit of pique because of what I said earlier? But he’s clearly not the kind of person to behave like this…

While I stare at him with bewilderment and helplessness, Li Zeyan offers me no additional explanation. His brooding eyes trace over the intentionally rolled-up hem of my skirt before resting on my face.

LZY: Your father is waiting for us in the living room.

LZY: Come over after you’ve changed your clothes.

—

•─────⋅◍♡◍⋅─────•

—

【Chapter 2】

I rush back to my room at lightning speed and take off the intricate and ornate feather headpiece from my head.

After changing into a dress that won’t elicit resigned criticism from my father, I head down the stairs in the direction of the living room, my mind in turmoil.

The sparkling crystal chandelier bathes the spacious room ahead in bright light. From a distance, I can hear the sound of gratified laughter, intermingled with my father’s heartfelt sighs.

MC’s Father: …Zeyan, don’t ever speak such words. If the disaster of that year had befallen me, your parents would have made the same choice.

MC’s Father: I remember when you first came to this home, MC was only five years old–– clinging to you all the time like a piece of sticky candy, oblivious to day and night. [1]

MC: Why is it that the moment I step in, I hear you speaking ill of me~

I walk over to my father and give him a kiss on the cheek, then take my seat next to Li Zeyan naturally.

He holds my gaze briefly before averting his eyes, but his tone carries a subtle softness that is almost imperceptible.

LZY: She was no bother. If anything, I find myself missing those times, too.

LZY: A plate of cookies was all she needed, and she’d joyfully sit by my desk, reading storybooks with me all night long.

MC: …I also really liked gege back then. No matter the time, you were always there to accompany me.

My father laughs, a wistful expression on his face. I also lift the corners of my lips to match the atmosphere, but my gaze lingers inquisitively on Li Zeyan’s elegant side profile.

Leaving… why did he have this idea all of a sudden?

I used to believe that no matter how much time elapsed… he would naturally remain by my side as a matter of course.

But this decision that came like a bolt from the blue seems to be telling me that I’m the only one who thought that way.

LZY: Yes, I’ve been keeping an eye on a promising aviation company. Their airplanes…

LZY: A number of stocks I acquired in the past few years have yielded good profits. After liquidating, my plans for the next steps include…

A baritone voice resounds from the seat next to me. Li Zeyan is recounting eloquently, seemingly answering some questions from my father, but I can’t pay attention in the slightest.

MC’s Father: …MC, won’t you raise a glass to your gege’s future?

My lower leg under the long table is gently touched, snapping me back to reality. I glance over to see Li Zeyan leisurely leaning back in his chair, his leather shoe brushing past me.

The brief touch just now was probably just an inadvertent act since he was shifting his sitting posture. However, it brings my attention to the fact that I’ve been staring at him for quite some time.

I let out a cough as an afterthought and quickly glance at my father.

MC: My apologies, I was a little lost in my thoughts just now, so…

MC’s Father: Of course, I am just as reluctant to part with him as you are… but I’m confident that when the time is right, Zeyan will come back to visit us.

This matter-of-fact comforting solace sweeps over my heart, gently veiling a certain “expectation” that I have never voiced.

An indescribable sourness swells within me. I raise my wine glass towards Li Zeyan beside me, wearing the same naive and coquettish smile as usual.

MC: …gege, here’s to every expectation of yours turning into reality.

Li Zeyan lowers his eyes, his slender fingertips promptly picking up a goblet glass from the table. Then, he leans in slightly towards me.

Accompanied by the soft clink of glasses, his deep and low voice resonates in my ears.

LZY: Thank you. I really like this toast.

LZY: I’ll turn these words into reality.

──────────

The moonlight behind the floor-to-ceiling windows filters through the sheer curtains, casting long and slender beams. I toss and turn on the soft bed for a long time before finally sitting up.

…Even if everything seems to be set in stone, I still want to fight for that last shred of possibility to make this man stay.

–

It’s very late at night, and the corridor is empty and quiet. I tread lightly past the door of my father’s room, then head briskly towards Li Zeyan’s room at the end of the corridor.

From a distance, I can see a sliver of light escaping from the room–– to my surprise, his door is only partially closed.

A soft meow reaches my ears. Holding my breath, I watch Li Zeyan seated on the sofa, comforting Betty, whose hind paws are entangled in a ball of yarn.

He cradles it in his arms with one hand, and his well-defined hand trails down the cat’s back, with a touch just right that is neither too firm nor too gentle, preventing its struggling attempts.

His fingertips swiftly probe into the entangled mess of threads. With a few simple movements, the trapped paws are liberated.

Betty: Meow~

Betty purrs contentedly, nuzzling its head against Li Zeyan’s shoulder. His eyes also seem to be dyed with a subtle smile.

The familiar scene overlaps with memories of the past, and suddenly, I feel a little dazed.

—

───── [FLASHBACK STARTS] ─────

Under the ardent daylight, the greenery in the courtyard stretched ponderously.

The doors and windows lining both sides of the mansion had been opened early in the morning, allowing the summer breeze to weave through unhindered, bringing with it a touch of rare, refreshing coolness.

I was huffing in anger as I strode down the corridor, heading towards Li Zeyan’s room in the most familiar manner, intending to “interrogate” him.

MC: GEGE! Did you stop…

I walked into his room, only to find a profound silence all around. Li Zeyan was lying on the sofa with his eyes closed and seemed to have drifted off to sleep.

Perhaps to block the dancing spots of dazzling sunlight, he casually rested the back of his left hand on his forehead, casting a gentle shadow over his eyelids.

His slender legs were rarely in such a relaxed posture, crossing casually. The business book in his hand had slipped to the floor at some point; its pages were blown by the breeze, producing a rustling sound.

Without realizing it, I lightened my steps and walked to the side of the sofa. I gazed at his dark strands of hair cascading down, gently resting on the prominent bridge of his nose.

Perhaps it was the light, but I suddenly noticed that there seemed to be some subtle changes on this face that I saw day and night.

Had his jawline become sharper? Or perhaps the knuckles of his hands seemed a little more pronounced? I couldn’t quite put my finger on it.

I could only feel my heartbeat accelerating for no apparent reason, as though something that had been overlooked for a long time was now breaking through the surface.

As if drawn by an inexplicable attraction, I involuntarily leaned down towards him, wanting to touch his cheek.

The next moment, I saw Li Zeyan suddenly open his eyes and lift his hand to clasp my wrist.

LZY: You…

He spoke in a low voice, his tone still carrying a hint of drowsiness. It seemed he regarded everything to be a dream.

His eyes took on a softer expression, and the hold of his palm on my hand did not loosen. Instead, he drew me even closer to him.

His breath caressed my face, and I could almost see my own reflection in his eyes. It was like almost in the next second, we would–––

MC’s Father: Where did you run off to… Betty?

My father’s inquiring voice suddenly echoed from a distance, akin to a pebble thrown into a lake, shattering the interplay of light and shadows before me.

Li Zeyan was frozen for a moment, and then a clarity flashed in his eyes as if finally waking up. He let go of my wrist. Suppressing the ineffable emotions in my heart, I swiftly distanced myself slightly.

LZY: …Why did you come in out of the blue?

MC: …the door was already ajar, and I didn’t know you were sleeping…

I muttered softly, but then I suddenly recalled something, my voice gaining a touch of confidence.

MC: I also have a question to ask. When James checked with you about whether I was available for a trip to the island next week, why did you reject him on my behalf?

Li Zeyan didn’t respond right away; he lowered his hand and picked up the rumpled book from the carpet.

LZY: Your father mentioned we have to go to the horse ranch next week; looks like you forgot.

LZY: Besides, there is no need to get involved with a guy whose family business is going downhill, yet he still dates a different girl every week.

MC: [girlie is stumped and flushed haha] But before this, you said about Oren that he was secretly lingering in underground bars!

Li Zeyan calmly flipped open a page, not making eye contact with me.

LZY: [HEAVENS THE WAY HIS TONE DROPS HERE] I’m simply stating the facts. Besides, you’ll have better choices.

MC: Like who?

In my frustration, I kept pushing for an answer, but then, the air suddenly lapsed into silence, and Li Zeyan’s fingertips also came to a pause.

My heart suddenly began racing by a few beats, and I stood up from the sofa in an attempt to conceal myself.

MC: …anyway, I won’t allow you to interfere in this matter anymore!

In a rush, I walked towards the door as I spoke. But suddenly, I heard Li Zeyan calling out my name.

I turned around. The daylight outside the window had already transformed into the fading colors of twilight, and with that light falling on his back, I heard him speak.

LZY: I will give you that answer in the future.

LZY: Until then, don’t barge into my room unannounced like this again.

───── [FLASHBACK ENDS] ─────

────

[Tidbits]:

[1] MC’s dad mentions a specific type of candy here (牛皮糖 - nǚpítáng), which is made from sugar and sesame seeds; and has a chewy and sticky texture.

—

•─────⋅◍♡◍⋅─────•

—

【Chapter 3】

LZY: Come on inside, I haven’t locked the door.

Li Zeyan’s voice suddenly transmits from the room. I snap back to reality, only to realize that my hand, which I raised to knock, has been hanging in mid-air for quite some time.

Tightening my lips, I calmly walk into the room and seat myself next to him on the sofa, my eyes scanning the room.

In the long time that followed afterward, I have refrained from setting foot in this room again. In stark contrast to my memories, the surroundings appear conspicuously emptier.

In one corner of the room, a leather suitcase lay open… the realization of the fact that this person is leaving suddenly becomes palpable.

LZY: You’re here at this hour; is something wrong?

MC: [blushing] …you can’t leave!

Two voices collide in unison. Before I can even register the situation, I have already grabbed hold of his hand.

LZY: …

The hazy lighting interweaves with the moonlight, and something seems to flash across Li Zeyan’s expression for a brief moment.

A searing warmth transmits from his palm, and in belated realization, I draw back my fingertips. However, I feel my hand being discreetly clasped, as if he is unwilling to let me escape.

LZY: What’s your reason for saying that?

MC: It’s not for any reason. I just want… gege to always remain by my side.

Even though it has been a long time since I have addressed him by that term when we are alone with each other, I still purposely soften my tone. I can’t help but expect that Li Zeyan would, just like in our childhood, give me that helpless glance and yield to my coquettish demands.

A silence hangs in the air as Li Zeyan lowers his gaze to mine. In the next moment, his palm enveloping my wrist loosens ever so slightly.

LZY: MC, I am not the same as the toys you wanted when we were little.

LZY: Just the word that you “want” this is not a reason enough to sway me.

I’m slightly stumped and speak without thinking.

MC: But we’ve been living a good life for all this time, haven’t we?

MC: We have the ancestral estates and assets, a steady stream of income… I don’t understand why you’d want to make any changes.

Li Zeyan lets out a very soft chuckle and tilts his head towards the window.

The lights of the distant structures shimmer brightly, reminiscent of a flowing banquet in the boundless night. They reflect in his eyes, exuding a mix of pride and ambition.

LZY: There is nothing in this world that remains unchanged forever, MC.

LZY: Even the prosperity that you indulge in today began after the soldiers returned from the European battlefield.

LZY: Everything we see now was beyond imagination just a few years ago.

LZY: This era can sweep away all outdated existence, and at the same time, it can also give people everything they desire… as long as they can grab hold of it.

Li Zeyan shifts his gaze back to me as he says this. Even though his tone seems to be gentler than usual, it also carries a hint of unswerving determination.

LZY: So, I had already made this decision a long time ago.

MC: …when?

Did it stem from the day he made his first profit in the stock market, relying on his own business acumen? Or was it when he caught the wind of the other “old money” people gossiping about him? Or perhaps it was even earlier?

In a state of bewilderment and urgency, I await a response, but Li Zeyan doesn’t answer my question. Instead, he just gazes at me fixedly, leaning slightly in my direction.

The tranquil glow of the lights paints his eyelashes, and my heart pounds wildly as I watch Li Zeyan approach. He lifts his hand, tucking a strand of hair that was lingering by my cheek behind my ear––

–– like an explanation, or perhaps a reassuring promise.

LZY: [in the most tender tone possible x1] I am so happy that you’re here to persuade me to stay.

LZY: [x2] But, there are certain things I want that I can only obtain by leaving.

──────────

Jennifer: Alright, honey, I’m not here to rush you about the manuscript or anything, even though that special column you promised me has been overdue for a solid three weeks~

My friend’s teasing reaches me through the light fabric. I pull down the covers sullenly, glancing at the blonde girl sitting at the edge of the bed.

MC: Once I’m back in the writing zone, I’ll submit it to the magazine first thing… but, setting that aside, did you manage to find out any news about him?

Even though I don’t explicitly utter Li Zeyan’s name, Jennifer shrugs her shoulders.

Jennifer: You know, your gege rarely attends any banquets within the circle.

Jennifer: I’ve been making discreet inquiries on the airline side, but all I’ve found is that there’s this new guy named Victor, whose company has become a rising star in the industry… but it doesn’t seem to have any connections with him.

—

[T/N]: Yes, his writers are using his EN name “Victor” as his pseudonym 😂😂

—

I press my lips together, thinking back to the day Li Zeyan left and how I was so angry that I refused to see him for one last time.

If only I had known earlier, I would have abandoned those inexplicable emotions, opened the door, and had a few words with him.

Jennifer: I have an idea. What if we were to spread the word that you’re planning to hold a banquet at the estate next month to reveal the person you’ve chosen to be your fiancé?

Jennifer: If he does have the intention toward you, there is no way he will able to keep it hidden.

I blink. This suggestion sends a few ripples through my heart–– daring as it is, it might be the most effective method.

With my tacit approval, this piece of news spreads from the mansion along with Jennifer’s departure, gradually circulating from one banquet to another.

Half a month slips away rapidly, yet I still don’t hear any updates. The day of the banquet approaches amidst apprehension and anticipation.

──────────

Large swaths of Phalaenopsis and Dendrobium orchids embellish various corners of the entire property, delicate and beautiful. Under the crystal chandeliers, the elegant fragrance of the flowers intermingle with the intense scent of perfumes, pervading the air.

With a smile, I express thanks or greetings to those who approach to congratulate me in pairs or groups, but my eyes continue to search for that figure I’ve been waiting for amidst the passing crowd.

Suddenly, a figure in a suit and leather shoes blocks my sight. A tall man walks over, raising his glass in a toast toward me.

Man: I’m Adam Arnott, a classmate of Jennifer’s from the academy.

The surname makes me realize that he hails from another wealthy family. I nod politely. However, the man shows no intention of leaving.

Man: I heard from Jennifer that you have a column in her magazine? Honestly, I find that quite impressive.

Man: In terms of killing time, it’s much more meaningful than being obsessed about choosing jewelry. Perhaps we can chat more…

Despite his courteous choice of words, the subtle condescension in his language leaves me agitated. I turn sideways with indifference, picking up a cupcake.

MC: Allow me to correct you. I don’t consider it as “something to kill time.” Had you read my articles, you wouldn’t have had that kind of judgment.

Man: Miss MC, you surely do not treat it as some serious work, do you? Forgive my bluntness, but it seems rather meaningless for people like us.

The way his attitude drips of being pampered as though he were a prince causes me to furrow my brows. Subconsciously, Li Zeyan’s image surfaces in my mind.

MC: Well, in that case, here’s to the everlasting prosperity of your family’s business… however, I’ve heard that nothing in this world remains unchanged forever.

The other party probably wasn’t expecting me to counter like this, causing the expression on his face to turn somewhat unpleasant.

Man: Why don’t we ask the talk of the town, the “new money” person, and whose viewpoint he stands by… Mr. Victor?

I nonchalantly turn my head and observe this rumored aviation tycoon from behind, involuntarily raising an eyebrow.

His slender physique is wrapped in a royal blue suit, complemented by a black and white polka dot tie around his neck. He stands out among the crowd of men, looking effortless yet debonair.

–– It’s the men’s fashion style I recommended in my articles. This person has actually read my column very carefully.

The corners of my lips can’t help but curl up slightly, watching that tall, straight figure turn around. But the instant I clearly see his visage, my lips part involuntarily.

With my heart beating like a drum, he walks to my side at a pace that is neither too fast nor too slow, bringing with him a subtle scent of sandalwood.

LZY: Of course, I stand by her viewpoint.

—

•─────⋅◍♡◍⋅─────•

—

【Chapter 4】

My eyes widen, and my gaze sweeps across the face of the person in front of me without even a single blink.

Perhaps due to the Southern sunshine, his complexion seems a shade deeper compared to the last time we saw each other, but his facial contours appear to be even more pronounced.

The fringes that he used to groom in a “proper” manner have now been slicked back into the trendiest hairstyle of the moment, showcasing his deep-set eyes and prominently arched eyebrows.

A pair of thin-rimmed glasses rest halfway on the bridge of his nose, not quite settled, and he casually pushes them up with his finger pad.

Through the lenses, a glimmer of smile seems to be shining in those deep eyes… or perhaps revealing certain emotions that were veiled in the past, but now, at this moment, seem evident with greater clarity.

LZY: The cream is about to melt.

As Li Zeyan speaks, he effortlessly takes the wobbling cupcake from my hand.

His broad and slender hand, wrapped in a moon-white glove, extends to pass me a piece of handkerchief.

Casual and comfortable, as if it weren’t a reunion after so long of separation, but rather our everyday interaction from back when we were still together at home.

I suppress the indescribable mix of sourness and joy in my heart, watching as the man converses with the people around him before raising an eyebrow.

Man: Ah, so you’re so Miss MC’s gege? Well, I suppose that explains your biased comment.

LZY: I believe the words I said just now are sufficiently objective.

LZY: If I’m not mistaken, with the inauguration of transatlantic flight routes, the stocks of shipping companies dropped at least ten percent. Your family’s business should be no exception.

LZY: To be able to maintain such unwavering optimism even in the midst of all these… I must say, Mr. Arnott’s attitude is truly admirable.

The man’s countenance grows slightly more ashen, while Li Zeyan stands next to me, calmly raising his glass to the crowd.

LZY: I rarely attend any social gatherings, so I haven’t formally announced it in a public setting. But six months ago, I had already disaffiliated myself from MC’s family.

LZY: And I’m not attending this banquet today in the identity of her “gege.”

I don’t know if it’s my illusion, but the tone of his latter statement seemed to have a slightly slower pace, triggering my heartbeat to accelerate uncontrollably.

Not as my “gege”… then, in what identity did he come? Perhaps, he knows about the news I’ve put out?

I clink my goblet glass with him, trying my hardest to maintain my usual casual expression, and lift my head slightly.

MC: I suppose I ought to be thanking you. After all, you’ve just returned, and here you are, immediately coming to my rescue.

Li Zeyan and I hold each other’s gazes for a brief moment. A subtle curve graces the corners of his lips as he also softens his voice.

LZY: I was being sincere, though.

LZY: I haven’t missed a single column you’ve written in 《The New Yorker》.

A wave of warmth accompanies his words, traveling from my ears to the throbbing center in my chest.

I gaze into those familiar and serene eyes, gently tapping the tie hanging down from his neck.

MC: Well, in that case, allow this writer to make one more suggestion.

MC: If it were replaced with a corrugated pattern in the same color, it would complement your suit today even better.

Li Zeyan sets down the goblet glass in his hand on the long table.

LZY: I didn’t bring an extra tie. Can I leave it to your care?

MC: Of course, come with me.

As I speak, my hand that was initially reaching to grasp his palm pauses mid-motion, and in the end, I settle for only holding onto his cuff.

He and I walk through the clustered bouquets of flowers and the crowd of people in their fragrant clothes, making our way toward the upper floor of the hall in a manner that couldn’t be more familiar.

Eyes from all around fall upon our departing figures. I don’t know if these people noticed anything, but I don’t care either.

All I know is that from the moment of parting, the thought that I painstakingly disregarded for the longest time became gradually clear: I desire to be with him in an identity that goes beyond our familial ties.

Will he be angry? Or will he helplessly discourage my intentions? Or perhaps, in reality, he does harbor certain unspoken feelings towards me…

──────────

Suppressing my tumultuous heartbeat, I close the door, and the chatter and music outside finally fade away.

The air falls silent for a moment. I let go of Li Zeyan’s cuff, turn around to rummage through the intricate accessories, and speak as if casually inquiring.

MC: Finally, I can breathe a sigh of relief… have you had a chance to meet Daddy yet?

LZY: [the muted joy in his tone HHHHH] Yeah, I went to his room to say hello after coming back, and we talked for a long time.

MC: Ah, he must’ve been so delighted; after all, he reminisces about you every now and then. “If Zeyan were here…,” is a sentence he says more often than not.

I exaggeratedly mimic my father’s manner of speaking, and my eyes secretly fall on Li Zeyan, hoping to catch his expression.

MC: You said earlier, “not as my gege”... then, in what identity are you here?

Maintaining a brisk tone, I continue sifting through without pausing my movements, as if this will be able to cloak my erratic heartbeat.

Li Zeyan doesn’t answer my question, and his footsteps come to a stop behind me. Even though there is a somewhat elusive distance between us, I can almost feel his body heat.

LZY: I’m not the one who can give that answer.

I turn around, somewhat puzzled, only to see a black, gold-plated box being extended towards me.

The huge ruby inside, set against the velvet backdrop, sparkles with a flash of dazzling brilliance.

MC: This…

LZY: A gift for you. A certain someone mentioned before that the quality of gemstones in New York isn’t good enough these days.

LZY: So, it was transported here on my company’s first transatlantic flight, all the way from Europe.

Li Zeyan removes the ruby from the box as he speaks, placing it in the palm of my hand.

The slight coolness of the gemstone accompanies the warmth of his fingertips, and I hear Li Zeyan speak in a soft tone.

LZY: Even the most impossible fantasies can become reality.

LZY: MC, as long as you say the word.

I’m utterly dazed, suddenly recalling the brief conversation we had under the stairs the night before Li Zeyan left.

From the past to the present, he has always borne the weight of all my wishes, even if I’ve only mentioned them in passing.

The sound of my heartbeat drums against my ears. Without uttering a word, I simply tug on his tie and rise on tiptoes towards this man who used to be my “gege.”

The distance between us bridges bit by bit, my somewhat quivering breath fanning across Li Zeyan’s face.

He watches me in complete silence, his eyes burning. He seems to be waiting for some form of confirmation, yet he doesn’t evade my actions.

That is, until, a fleeting kiss lands on the edge of his lips, and we briefly exchange our warmth with each other. I pull back slightly, avert my eyes, and speak.

MC: …what if this is what I desire?

LZY: …

I don’t hear his response. In the next second, my waist is suddenly shackled in place.

A deep kiss, which has been held in check for a long time, finally descends, erasing the last vestige of distance.

Two sets of lips that have never touched each other before roll back and forth, their inexperienced and slightly shaky intertwining exchange breaths that have long been familiar but never explored so deeply.

In those eyes of his, I see emotions mirroring my own. Patiently restrained feelings, a fluttering heart… but now added with a touch of certainty.

LZY: I’ve probably held onto this expectation for longer than you.

LZY: What I longed for has always been right there within sight… and you made it a reality for me.

The brilliant chandelier overhead leaves shimmering spots in the field of vision, leaving one slightly dizzy. It feels like a firework that has been brewing for a long time has finally burst forth.

Turns out, we both harbored the same feelings all along.

The eyes that turned to look back when we passed by each other, the hands that reached out to touch only to retract… all the entanglements and poignant emotions of the past gently dissipate in this moment.

I close my eyes and hear his voice resonate, but now carrying with it a deeper undertone of mirth than ever before.

LZY: Allow this gem to be a commemoration of this special occasion.

LZY: For that first dance in a while, how about sharing it with me?

────────────────────────────────

[Tidbits]:

[2] so in love with this imagery here. “白月光” (white moonlight) in chinese means first love but it comes with the connotation of something “unattainable.” here, it’s the color of his gloves, the “barrier” between their hands truly touching~ 🤧

[3] “ruby” is a symbol of passion, protection, everlasting love-- indeed the perfect move for Li Zeyan to choose this stone as his ~betrothal gift~ 🥺

[4] welp, if it wasn’t clear already LOL, sharing the “first dance” at this banquet is their official announcement of their engagement~ 🤭🤧

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【Anika’s personal notes】

link to my twitter meltdowns for easier navigation LOL: ♡ || ♡

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caesurables · 4 months

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“Happy New Year, my Dummy”

#mica doodles #mlqc #mr love queen's choice #mr love mobile #恋与制作人 #victor li #李泽言

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caesurables · 5 months

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Just posting guilty challenge vic here too~

#mica doodles #mlqc #恋与制作人 #victor li #李泽言

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caesurables · 5 months

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[CN] Victor’s Cold Winter Date (Eng Translation)

⌚Warning⌚ This post contains detailed spoilers for a date, 凛冬之约, that is yet to be released on the global server! ♡

[Translation under the cut]

•─────⋅◍♡◍⋅─────•

【Subbed Video】

[anika’s notes]: I do very very very highly recommend to watch the video for full immersion + absolute god-level voice acting + the gorgeous music pieces!!! ༼⁠;⁠´⁠༎ຶ⁠ ⁠۝ ⁠༎ຶ⁠༽

youtube

—

【Prologue】

I behold My homeland disappear in the daylight, and emerge in the night. I behold The everlasting power engrain within the vast blood of my people. I behold A snow-white rose bloom in the winter, And I behold as it withers in the winter – each petal sailing across the ocean, To a kingdom no one can reach.

—

•─────⋅◍♡◍⋅─────•

—

【Chapter 1】

As the night gradually deepens, the heavy curtains in front of the window are drawn by the attendants, veiling the silvery, meandering moonlight.

I take a deep breath and push open the doors to the royal bedchamber engraved with a luxurious imperial coat of arms.

Inside the bedchamber, my newly wedded husband, King Victor, is fast asleep.

Not long ago, at the behest of my father, Duke William, I was betrothed to Victor.

Regrettably, before the ceremony could be held, my parents died of ailing health.

However, the wedding was not delayed due to the unexpected tragedy, and the ceremony proceeded as scheduled, with the Church as witness.

After all, to those people, what mattered the most was not the protagonists of the wedding, but the wedding ceremony itself.

–– That’s right, it’s not just me; even the king, Victor, is not held with significance in their eyes.

After all, it’s known to everyone in the capital that the royal family’s influence is eroding with each passing year. And since Victor succeeded to the throne, he remains in a coma all year round and is merely a puppet in the hands of the Church and nothing more.

The elusive fragrance of beeswax pervades the air in the room. I step on the soft woolen carpet and draw closer to the bedside. [1]

Lately, the capital has been shrouded in a haze of doubts and suspicion regarding the disappearance cases, and it was not the appropriate time for grandeur. Therefore, after the hasty wedding, I was ushered into the imperial palace.

And tonight marks the third night I’m spending alongside His Majesty, the King, who’s been in a state of perennial coma.

Victor is still in a deep slumber.

The light from a few candles illuminates one side of his profound features, while the lingering shadows dance across his face as if with fondness.

Throughout the generations, the kings have always been in robust health. But during Victor’s reign, his health has been continuously plagued with illness.

It seems even the gods cannot bear to be too cruel to him. His illness has only brought a touch of frailty but has not marred his looks.

I inhale softly and sit on the edge of the bed, propping my chin up as I gaze at Victor in his slumber.

MC: ...why are you still sleeping?

I’ve already started to grow accustomed to this— the bedchamber echoing only my own whispered monologues.

MC: I thought the Church was so wary of you because you had some secrets that were unknown to the outsiders.

MC: Now it seems your biggest secret is that you were born this good-looking.

I crack a joke to myself, which also lightens my mood considerably.

MC: When I think about it this way, being married to you is far better than being forced by the Church to marry one of those evil, rotten old men.

In addition, within the palace, at least, there are no hypocritical relatives and those ever-watchful eyes—

I have enough space to contemplate my plan for revenge.

MC: Revenge... revenge... MC: But how can I go about taking revenge on the Church...

Clutching a corner of Victor’s blanket, I cover my face with it in anguish.

The Church conspired to murder my parents.

Because my father was a leader of the reformist faction, they extended their malicious hands targeting my family.

And this marriage, which was arranged by my parents, is now being wielded as a means to threaten my life.

As I ponder on this, the resentment in my heart swells. I heave a sigh, deciding to change my mood and say something interesting.

I sporadically recount some happy and entertaining anecdotes from the past, treating Victor as a well-behaved “sleeping beauty doll.”

MC: ...in autumn, you know, there wasn’t much to do. Winter, in comparison, was way more fun. MC: When I was young, what I loved doing the most was building little snowmen in the courtyard of the duke’s mansion after it snowed. Look, I could make them this big—

Of course, Victor can’t see any of this, and there’s no hope for a response either. After mustering the spirit to prattle on for a while, all I am left with is endless emptiness.

I tug at the corners of my lips, forcing a smile, and as if driven by some strange impulse, I reach out and poke Victor’s face, wishing to get him to have the same expression as me.

MC: Sigh, it’s no fun. I won’t say anything more. ??(Victor): Why won’t you say anything more?

An icy voice suddenly sounds in my ears, carrying with it the raspiness of just being awakened.

I turn my head and nearly let out a scream.

MC: Y-Your Majesty... when did you...! [2]

I’m not sure when, but Victor has regained consciousness at some point. Leaning on a soft pillow, he rubs his temple with one hand.

Victor: I’m conscious, not revived back to life.

MC: ... I’ll sincerely obey Your Majesty’s command!

In a low voice, I respectfully offer him a curtsy. Victor seems to find my behavior amusing, a smile tugging at the corners of his lips.

Victor: The term of address was “you” even just a moment ago. A certain someone changed her tune rather quickly. [3] MC: I’m not “a certain someone,” I am... Victor: I know, Duke William’s only daughter. MC: [surprised] Eh...?

Victor: At the age of seven, you received a scolding for building a snowman with the servants. When you were nine, you had a quarrel with a parrot and suffered a crushing defeat––

MC: Wait a minute, you... you heard all of that?

Victor: You’re too noisy. It’d be hard not to hear, [breaks into a coughing fit] cough, cough...

His words are cut off by a cough. I hastily pour a cup of water and offer it to him under his scrutinizing gaze, keeping silent.

I can’t help but break into a cold sweat.

Could it be that... all the past events I casually mentioned, all those self-deprecating remarks, and even... did he really listen to everything?

But, two days ago, when I plucked up the courage to poke his face, he didn’t react at all... So, when did he actually become conscious?

A vague, looming sense of oppression involuntarily makes me shrink my neck, and I tentatively open my mouth.

MC: ...you know about everything regarding me?

He tilts his jaw slightly upwards, studying my features. His eyes are submerged in the shadows cast by the candlelight, reminiscent of a predator in the dark night.

A good while passes before he eventually accepts the cup, speaking in a tone that is neither amiable nor impassive.

Victor: I do.

I nod and, after a rapid mental calculation, make up my mind. I take a step forward, wearing a small smile on my face as I speak.

MC: Including the fact that I was sent as a spy by the Church?

Victor: [seemingly chokes on water] …

Victor: Are you aware of what you’re saying?

MC: Yes, I’m aware.

I wish to work together with the king to bring down the Church.

And when working with a person like Victor, being transparent and honest is the first principle.

I crouch down at the edge of the bed, looking up at Victor from below.

MC: Your Majesty, I don’t want to hide anything from you.

MC: Prior to our nuptials, my parents were brutally attacked by the Church due to their advocacy for the reformation of the Church.

MC: The Church, to exploit my worth, spared my life and assigned me to spy on you.

Victor arches an eyebrow, clearly still assessing the credibility of my words.

Victor: Continue.

I press my lips together and lower my head, trying to convey my utmost sincerity.

MC: ... I’m unsure of to what extent you know about me, but I’ve never once considered surrendering to the enemies who murdered my parents.

MC: Now, in terms of both sentiment and reason, we are a family, and I cannot betray my husband.

MC: So... Your Majesty, will you take me under your wings?

I blink my eyes at him with a pitiful look, not knowing whether Victor would buy into it.

Victor: …

As if in need of a moment to compose himself, Victor seems to momentarily avert his eyes before he turns them back to me again.

Victor: Family... you seem to have accepted your new identity quite readily.

MC: Besides you, what else do I have to rely on?

MC: On the contrary, even after hearing my confession, if you’re unwilling to help me, I don’t have anything to lose.

I flutter my eyes at Victor.

MC: Your Majesty, I’ve already got nothing left to lose.

Victor holds a straight gaze on me. In his eyes, while there is finally a hint of recognition, it’s more as if he is peering into the past through me.

Victor: ...I will help you.

His well-defined hand sweeps my loose hair strands back for me. But before I can breathe a sigh of relief, the next second, my chin is cupped and pivoted to face him.

Victor: The prerequisite is that you can offer sufficient value to me.

His grip is surprisingly strong for someone who has just regained consciousness. As our eyes interlock, his penetrating gaze intently scrutinizes my innermost thoughts.

Victor: In your eyes, your husband, whom you’d never met before, is nothing more than a puppet who remains in coma year-round, isn’t that right?

Victor unfolds his hand to me, revealing a gem as vividly red as the human heart in his pallid palm, and then he encloses his hand—

In the blink of an eye, the signs of illness are shed off his face, and a rosy hue colors his cheeks, and he seems to be bathed in a divine light.

MC: This is... do you know witchcraft?!

Victor places the gem back in its case, then casts a brief look in my direction, apparently turning a deaf ear to what I’ve said.

Victor: This doesn’t concern you.

He slowly curls his lips, and his pupils, akin to the deep sea in the darkness, are as profound and enigmatic.

Victor: There’s a set of clothing on the bedside table. If you want to prove that you’re not just a noble canary—

Victor: Tomorrow morning, change into it and accompany me out of the palace.

──────────

[Notes]:

[1] Beeswax is often considered a symbol of “eternal love” in Eastern cultures.

[2+3] During her monologues in the 1st quarter of the date, MC was addressing Victor by “你” (informal ver. of ‘you’) pronoun. But the moment he butts in, i.e., gains consciousness, MC immediately switches to “您” (courteous/ respectful ver. of ‘you’) and the respectful address “Your Majesty,” which he teases her about here, haha.

Point to be noted: MC doesn’t switch back to the informal terms of addresses until the 3rd chapter of the date, when they’re already in love and inseparable for the time being. ༎ຶ‿༎ຶ

—

•─────⋅◍♡◍⋅─────•

—

【Chapter 2】

While I’m still struggling with myself, Victor has already closed his eyes again.

Victor: You can sleep anywhere you want; just don’t make any noise.

MC: ...Yes, Your Majesty!

The idea of having this mysterious and aloof king sleeping next to my pillow feels more chilling to me than freezing in the cold itself.

I don’t hesitate at all. I swiftly grab a pillow from the bed and get prepared to spend the night on the sofa.

But it turns out I actually overestimated my ability to withstand the cold. Before the clock hands have even moved a few notches, I quietly tiptoe back to the bed, hugging the pillow.

MC: [to herself] It’s just that the weather is too cold. I just want to feel a bit nice and warm—

With a huff, I murmur in a soft voice and gently lift the coverlet to slip inside.

Once I’ve got my body settled comfortably, I cautiously look towards the person on the pillow next to me.

Victor isn’t awakened by my movements. Even in the darkness of the night, his skin is luminously white, his features handsome— he is reminiscent of a sculpture crafted from snow.

Considering this person’s track record of feigning sleep, I simply watch him quietly without making any more rash moves.

As I continue watching like this, my mind inexplicably begins to wander.

Although just moments ago, I kept addressing him as “my husband” repeatedly, when I look at Victor’s cold and handsome demeanor, I always find it difficult to connect him with that identity.

In my impression, the image of a husband and wife is like that of my parents. So, in the future, will Victor and I also be joined at the hip and inseparable like that?

Thinking about that reserved and unsmiling face, I can’t help but get chills.

In his eyes, I seem to be nothing more than a “useful person.” But what value can I provide for him?

The more I ponder, the more my head throbs, and it’s not until the horizon starts to turn slightly pale that I eventually drift into sleep.

──────────

With the break of dawn, I promptly get out of bed and change my attire. Victor has woken up as well.

Seemingly noticing the dark circles under my eyes, he arches an eyebrow, lifts his hand, and tosses a cloak over to me.

Victor: It seems like while your courage is not at all small, your confidence sure is lacking.

MC: I just don’t wish to unnecessarily show off in front of you.

I fasten the cloak tightly and purposely straighten my neck.

MC: Your Majesty, please lead the way.

We exit the palace through a small gate, cross through the commoner’s district, and Victor leads me straight into a small house.

──────────

Going from the small house into the cellar, and after navigating through a labyrinth of winding pathways, the cramped field of view suddenly opens up to a wide panorama.

Everyone: Your Majesties.

I never anticipated that the entire hall would actually be filled with guards, all standing in a perfectly ordered formation.

— To pull together an assembly of so many armed personnel, Victor must have spent a substantial amount of time, hasn’t he?

I’m hardly able to restrain my inner shock as I think back to the frequent news in recent years of nobles associated with the close-knit sects being removed from power or inexplicably meeting tragic ends. Now, it seems...

Every single person, myself included, severely underestimated this “dying” king standing before me.

At this moment, Victor picks something up from the long table, and it’s only now do I notice that there are all kinds of torture equipment laid out on the table.

The appearance of these torture instruments is menacing, and at their tips, dried blood remnants are still visible.

Practically, the moment I get a good look at them, the reeking of blood and rust assaults my nostrils. I subconsciously cover my nose and mouth, tightly gripping the cuff of my sleeve.

Subordinate: Reporting to Your Majesty, these are the “refining” equipment we found at the scene.

Subordinate: But those people are as cautious as rats at dusk; we’ve only found these pieces of material evidence so far. The remains of the blood sacrifice are still being sought.

Victor nods calmly, and once the arrangements are made, the guards depart in an orderly manner through various secret passageways.

Victor and I are the only ones remaining in the large hall. I make a conscious effort to restrain myself from looking at those torture instruments, regulating the rhythm of my breathing.

MC: Your Majesty, did you bring me here to witness something so horrifying to disclose some kind of truth to me?

Victor: Face has turned pale, but still got some courage.

A smile tinged with what appears to be praise appears on his face, as he takes out from his bosom the gem that resembles a human heart from last night.

The crimson light radiating from the gem spreads across his cheeks, eerie yet bewitching.

Victor: The purpose of all these blood sacrifices is to provide energy for this “Blood King Crystal.”

My eyes widen in incredulity as I stare at the pulsating vivid red in his hand, sensing a faint inkling of what it might signify.

MC: When you hold this Blood King Crystal, your complexion appear rosier, and you don’t cough as much...

MC: Could it be that the Church officials want to extract energy from commoners to enhance their physical strength?

Victor: Not the Church; it’s the Royal Family.

Victor doesn’t shy away from nodding his head. He stares fixedly at the red gem that provides him with strength, but in his eyes, there is only icy coldness.

Victor: The vitality and longevity of successive kings across the dynasties were all due to their possession of the “Blood King Crystals” that were assembled from the lives of countless ordinary people.

Victor: The Church refines it, and the Royal Family uses it, thus resulting in the Royal Family being controlled by the Church from then on.

Victor: And anyone who uncovers this secret will die.

My thoughts go back to my parents, as well as the reformist cabinet ministers— could it be that they all had...?

My heart immediately falls into a valley.

I close my eyes for a moment, then fix my gaze firmly on the unwavering king before me, a king who has endured extreme hardships and made sacrifices to stand where he is now. [4]

MC: Your Majesty, currently, there is a significant following of the Church among the populace. We must find the evidence of the blood sacrifices and bring it to light for everyone to see.

MC: I will carry on my parents’ legacy and work alongside you to find evidence of the Church’s blood sacrifices.

In those forever serene eyes of Victor’s, I see the glint of a smile.

Victor: [assuredly with obvious happiness] It appears you’ve perfectly inherited the chivalry and wisdom of Duke William.

MC: Well... it’s not entirely that. Whether in public or private matters, it’s only right that I stand by your side.

I wink at him, half-jokingly breaking the somewhat somber atmosphere.

MC: After all, I’m not only the daughter of Duke William. I am your wife and, more importantly, the queen of this country.

Victor: Is that right? It doesn’t seem to me that a certain someone possesses the temperament of a queen.

MC: Regarding that... I will work hard, so you can’t keep teasing me all the time.

Victor laughs in spite of himself and reaches out his hand, gesturing for me to take his arm.

Victor: [laughs helplessly] Very well. My Queen, we should return now.

──────────

After coming out of the subterranean passageway, we follow the same path back. We were in a hurry when we came here. It’s only now do I take notice of the surroundings.

In the nearby roadside, peddlers are selling fresh produce, while in the distant square, a group of less fortunate are circled around a fire, warming themselves and singing songs.

The streets in the commoner’s district are intersected, narrow, poverty-stricken yet bustling with life, in stark contrast to the overwhelming dead silence of the royal palace.

I hardly ever left the mansion, so I find myself unable to resist taking in the surroundings repeatedly.

Victor: Does the Duke’s daughter find these things interesting?

MC: ...no, no, I’m just looking around in passing, that’s all!

Victor’s hand offhandedly adjusts a corner of my cloak. He takes a long stride, veering from the route back to the palace and heading in a different direction.

Victor: That path is too narrow. Let’s stroll this way and get some fresh air.

We slowly stroll along, taking in the surroundings as we walk. Not far ahead, there is a dilapidated small tavern. Victor gestures for me to take a look.

Victor: I just suddenly recalled that you mentioned being curious when you were little and licking the snow with a fork.

Victor: During winter, the iron cups in the tavern also have an element of sweetness. You should try it some other time.

My scattered thoughts, fluttering around like wild and untamed grass, suddenly drop to the ground, and I can’t help but choke.

MC: ...Your Majesty, are you teasing me?

There is a slight curve at the tip of Victor’s brow as he gently curls the corners of his lips into a smile.

Victor: [laughs softly] Perhaps I am, or perhaps, it is a sincere recommendation.

MC: Could it be that you’ve drawn that conclusion after experiencing it firsthand?

Victor: You could say that.

Seeing him take the bait, a massive smile spreads across my face.

MC: So, speaking of, does that mean that you’ve also stuck your tongue to an iron cup in the past?

Victor seems to choke on his words for a moment. He shoots me a wordless look and walks forward, paying no mind to me.

MC: [teasingly continues] So, did that really happen? Did it happen or not...

We’ve almost circled the area surrounding the palace. Victor is tall and has long legs, but from the beginning, he has maintained a matching pace with me, making it so that I can always touch his shoulder by simply turning sideways.

The weather is very cold today; my hands and feet are freezing, yet I deeply breathe in the bitingly chilly but liberating air.

Even though I cannot purchase any dubious items to bring back to the palace, and even though I know the end of this path leads to the imperial palace that holds me captive—

But perhaps because I have someone walking alongside me, I feel surprisingly at ease.

In my sight, obscured by the chilling breeze, I see Victor squatting down and petting a skinny kitten at the corner of the alley.

The cat stretches its body and lays down lazily under Victor’s hand, meowing. Victor smiles, and both of them then look at me together.

Victor: [extremely softly] The winters in the future won’t be as chilling anymore.

──────────

[Notes]:

[4] The idiom used here is “越王勾践,” which came to life from the true story of King Goujian. I’d encourage you guys to just even google and see the small wiki on him if you can. This idiom in and of itself is the essence of the date in terms of Victor’s perseverance, and how he imposes suffering on himself for the constant reminder of what it is he’s fighting for by refusing to use the “Blood King Crystal.”

—

•─────⋅◍♡◍⋅─────•

—

【Chapter 3】

Victor soon announces the news of him regaining consciousness to the masses, sending waves of shock to everyone across the country.

Amidst the reigning turmoil among the Church and the nobles, he proposes visiting the prominent noble households.

In my capacity as the queen, I rightfully visit every noble residence with him, where we find numerous correspondences implicating the collusion between the nobles and the Church.

The nobles kept the letters for the purpose of blackmailing the Church, both sides engaging in mutual exploitation, but they never once considered that there could be one day when they’d have to face the consequences.

Using the letters as a starting point, a series of pivotal evidence regarding the Church’s blood sacrifice is unearthed through Victor’s thunderous methods.

I, on the other hand, use my identity as an orphan of the reformers to help him win over the newly elevated nobles. More and more people begin to rally to our side...

When a former subordinate of my father hands me a letter, as if in tacit agreement, both Victor and I simultaneously realize that the final piece of the puzzle has fallen into place.

It’s about time for the verdict to be pronounced.

──────────

Tomorrow, Victor will convene a National Convention to expose the crimes of the Church to the masses.

I can’t fall asleep, so I rise from the bed and pace around the bed chamber in my nightgown.

Victor: [laughs helplessly] If memory serves me right, the person set to address tomorrow is not the queen; it’s the king.

He is lying in bed with drowsy eyes. Turning towards me, he speaks in a low, raspy voice, infused with a teasing tone.

MC: ...I didn’t realize I’d wake you up despite the carpet being so thick. I guess I’ll just go outside and sleep elsewhere.

As I drape on my outer garment and am about to head outside the chamber, my wrist is suddenly gripped from behind, pulling me back onto the bed.

Victor: [in an overwhelmingly sensual tone] You’re the queen. Where do you plan on sleeping when you look like this?

Tangled up in my thoughts, I have tousled my hair, causing it to become disheveled. Victor sighs, who then picks up a comb and sits behind me.

Victor: [switches to an overwhelmingly tender tone] Dummy. What is there to be nervous about?

The moderate pressure on my hair pacifies my restless heart. I rub my ears, which have heated up, trying to shift the topic of conversation to conceal my shyness.

MC: In the past, when my father would go to visit the king, my mother would become anxious like this and often wouldn’t even be able to eat anything.

Victor: So, what would happen next? I’m afraid the duke probably wouldn’t let his duchess remain in a constant state of worry.

MC: Mm-hmm. Whenever this kind of situation arose, my father would always hold my mother’s hand...

As I speak, I immediately begin to regret it a little. It feels like I’m sending a rather awkward hint.

Without waiting for me to dwell on more embarrassing thoughts, Victor’s hand has already enveloped mine, and the warmth from his palm flows to my icy fingertips.

His temperature is reminiscent of dandelions in a garden, floating gently, landing on my face and neck.

We are the puppet king and queen, husband and wife in name only. Even though we reside together in the same bedchamber, we’ve never been this intimate.

I feel a sensation as if a feather quill is caressing my throat, making it impossible for me to conceal the true feelings harbored in my heart.

Reflexively, I tighten my grip on Victor’s hand and turn to face him.

MC: Victor, to be honest, even though I never mentioned it before, I used to think you were quite unfeeling.

Victor: There was no need to say it; it was written all over your face.

Victor: Also, not addressing me as “Your Majesty” anymore?

MC: In any case, you are not going to hold it against me now, will you?

MC: During this period of time that I’ve spent with you, running here and there together, I’ve come to realize in every passing moment that I hardly knew anything about you before.

MC: For instance, in the case of those Church henchmen, according to the old laws, their families should have been exterminated, but you chose to exercise your discretion and grant amnesty to those who were unaware.

MC: And regarding the commoners who have fallen victim to the blood sacrifice, you’ve been supporting their families with long-term financial aid.

MC: You always project an image of keeping people at a thousand-mile distance, but in reality, there is also a tender side to you.

A flicker of astonishment crosses Victor’s eyes, but he simply tightens his grip on my hand.

Victor: [with a very evident hesitation in his tone] It sounds like... getting to know me is something that brings you joy?

MC: Yes, it does. I wish to know you even better— the past you, the present you, and the future you.

I gaze deeply into his eyes.

MC: But you’re so encumbered by everything. I can only utilize the little time you set aside for me each day to learn about you amidst the calls of the people.

Victor: ...MC.

Victor’s eyes tighten, and a heartfelt and regretful emotion swirls within them.

MC: I don’t wish to rob you of your time because of my selfish desires.

MC: So, after the National Convention concludes, and when you’re no longer so busy...

I draw in a breath, low and slow. And like that, just like the first time I met him, I lay bare all my yearnings and affections before him.

MC: Reserve some time for me, will you? Not in your role as the king, but as my husband. Share your stories with me.

MC: Will you, Victor?

All my thoughts translate into clumsy words, pouring out like the way winter grass eagerly awaits spring rain, confessing everything I have in me.

Victor continues gazing at me like this, until that gaze of his becomes infused with almost sorrow and a reluctance to part.

Before I can decipher those cryptic code words, he has already cast his eyes downward, veiling the emotions within.

Is this a silent rejection? I exert myself to force a smile, intending to crack a joke to ease the situation, but then he speaks first.

Victor: [if a person’s voice alone could shatter one’s heart, I swear this would be it] There’s no need to wait till later. Let’s do it now.

In astonishment and jubilation, I look up, locking eyes with his sincere gaze.

On the night before the pivotal moment in destiny, I finally witness Victor’s wordless confession.

──────────

The following day, the National Convention proceeds as scheduled.

Attired in royal robes, Victor stands at the forefront. Below the platform, countless eyes, some treacherous and others devout, are all converged on him.

Victor: In my capacity as the king, I stand here only to declare one thing.

Victor: The mysterious disappearances in the capital over the years have all been caused by the Church.

The earth-shattering statement stirs up a commotion among the people, and the followers of the Church appear visibly unsettled.

Victor: The Church extracts energy for the “Blood King Crystal” through the massacre of civilians in blood sacrifice rituals.

Victor: As for the particulars, I will leave it to the Knight Commander to elucidate.

The attendants toss numerous sheets of paper into the crowd off the platform, each containing records of clear and unmistakable evidence.

In a matter of moments, the crowd transitions from initial silence to restlessness, ultimately erupting into an agitated uproar.

It turns out that the matter of the true culprit behind the disappearance cases has been an enduring emotional anchor for the people, completely overturning everyone’s cognition.

Some hurling curses, some wailing, and some even charging to express their scorn at the Church...

Amidst the chaos, only Victor’s voice, his calm and powerful words, continues forward with a steady resolve.

Crowd: Overthrow the Pope, give us back our people! Overthrow the Pope, give us back our people!

As the chants and shouts cease and amid the furious uproar of the crowd, the Pope, who is ringed, calmly casts a glance in Victor’s direction.

The Pope: Silence. Dear Compatriots.

The elderly Pope walks slowly to the center of the platform, an inscrutable and chilling smile playing on the layers of wrinkles on his face.

The Pope: His Majesty speaks the truth. The Church does indeed extract energy for the “Blood King Crystal,” and the blood sacrifice of civilians has truly occurred.

The Pope: However, all these casualties and deaths stemmed from the demands of the royal family!

The Pope: Throughout history, every king has relied on the “Blood King Crystal” to survive, and even our righteous and dignified king, His Majesty, is using it at this very moment!

The Pope: The very purpose of the “Blood King Crystal’s” existence is to secure the longevity of the king. Without a king, who will lead the country? How can the kingdom have a future?

The Pope raises the scepter high, directing it towards Victor.

The Pope: Your Majesty, the Church has been faithful and devoted to the Crown for all these years. As you pronounce judgment on the Church’s sins today, do you not feel a sense of guilt?

The wrath of the masses below the platform has no outlet after his manipulative and distorted speech, and their eyes shift to Victor.

Silent inquiries and judgments flood the eyes of the crowd, prepared to tear everything to shreds at any second.

The noble king, however, has maintained his impassive demeanor from the beginning. He lapses into a moment of silence, gazing into my eyes.

Amid the scrutiny of the spectators below, I lock my eyes with him, and in that gaze, I see the very same expression of unwillingness to part that I wasn’t able to discern last night.

But at this moment, I seem to understand its meaning.

Holding back the bitterness in my eyes, I take a step forward and speak in a loud voice.

MC: What the Pope said is true. The kings of the previous dynasties colluded with the Church for their personal gains, resulting in the slaughtering of civilians.

MC: However, the Blood King Crystal has never been a precious treasure, but rather a curse.

MC: As each king became more reliant on it, the health of the royal descendants suffered increasing repercussions, which led to an even deeper dependence on the Church.

MC: His Majesty has been working tirelessly to put an end to these nefarious activities, solely for the sake of the future of this country.

MC: As for the Blood King Crystal...

I close my eyes, my eloquent speech coming to an abrupt halt. This elicits puzzled murmurs from the crowd off the platform.

At this time, Victor walks to the forefront of the stage.

He retrieves the vivid red gem from his bosom, and the blinding luster falls on his chest, projecting an image as if blood were coursing through.

Victor: Behold, the Blood King Crystal.

Before anyone can comprehend, Victor swiftly exerts a slight force with his fingertips, and the Blood King Crystal instantly disintegrates into fine fragments in his hand.

Pope: You...!!

Countless crimson red powder, reminiscent of blood, streams out from between his fingers, and his complexion has already turned a shade of pallor.

The elixir of immortality, amassed from the sacrifice of countless human lives across generations of kings, the venomous sac upon which the Church depends for survival, has been completely eradicated before the eyes of everyone.

Victor: Those deserving of being brought to reckoning, not a single person will be spared.

Victor: That includes the Church, as well as the Royal family.

He unfurls the hand that holds the Blood King Crystal. His palm now only holds a thin layer of gemstone powder, and he allows it to be carried away by the northern breeze.

Victor: Henceforth, dust will return to the earth, and blood will be bestowed upon the people.

Victor: I shall personally redeem the filth that has accumulated for far too long.

—

•─────⋅◍♡◍⋅─────•

—

【Chapter 4】

In the wake of the National Convention, Victor instigates a series of reform policies to root out corruption, setting off a massive surge across the country.

He works tirelessly day and night, paying no heed to my attempts to dissuade him. There is an urgency in him that I don’t want to understand, a rush that drives him to get everything in order.

Throughout this time, I’ve been seeking out renowned physicians from everywhere, but all I’ve received are negative answers filled with a mix of dread and despair.

Until one day, he slips back into a coma again, and even the duration of his coma seems to be stretching longer and longer as the days elapse.

And all I can do, or more accurately, want to do, is simply to remain by his side.

With his eyelashes hanging low, a gentle shadow falls upon that beautiful yet pallid face, and it seems even his breathing has become very light.

As I gaze at Victor’s side profile in deep slumber, I can no longer find the same relaxed and carefree state of mind I had when I first stepped into the royal bedchamber.

He is no longer someone who could have confined me, the husband I had never met before, but rather my beloved with whom I have been through thick and thin together.

My only wish is for him to open his eyes and look at me, share some dry jokes, and then walk with me through the streets and alleys again and observe how people are living nowadays...

Victor’s life began wither away the instant the Blood King Crystal was shattered. All he can do now is expend every ounce of the remaining warmth.

He knew the consequences better than anyone else, yet he still orchestrated his own ending with his own two hands.

I remain by the bedside, tightly holding onto his hand. I can’t tell whether I’m trying to comfort him or myself.

MC: [sobbing] Victor...

Tears well up and stream down my eyes. A hand reaches up to caress my cheek, gently wiping away those tears.

Victor: Why are you crying?

Victor has woken up at some point without my notice and is now frowning as he looks at me.

Quickly, I wipe away the tears in a haphazard manner, the corners of my eyes stinging from the abrasion of my forceful fingertips.

MC: I’m alright. Are you hungry? What would you like to eat?

Victor doesn’t answer. Instead, his gaze passes over my shoulder and settles on the view outside the window.

Victor: It’s snowing.

It’s only now do I take notice that the imperial palace courtyard has already been blanketed in snow, transforming into an expanse of pristine white.

Victor: Weren’t you most fond of building snowmen when you were a child? Why not give it a try now?

MC: But your health...

Victor: [in an even tender and heart-wrenchingly weaker tone] It’s just building a snowman.

I press my lips together. The truth is, I have long grown to despise winter, and I don’t like building snowmen anymore.

After the death of my parents, the attendants who had been my companions from childhood to adulthood were all substituted with the informants from the Church, and the duke’s mansion became eerily cold and desolate.

The winter season I once loved became increasingly colder as time went on, and I no longer had the desire to go out. Warmer seasons began to become more likable to me.

But none of these are worth mentioning to Victor. Because this winter— it is marked by the moment I met him.

I nod.

MC: Of course.

MC: In that case, I must show you the snowmen-building skills I’ve honed since childhood!

I force a smile and step outside with Victor after donning our outer garments. He tucks my hand into his cloak.

Victor: A certain someone was shivering in the cold during the last outing, and she still forgot to bring her gloves this time.

MC: I did it intentionally. Otherwise, how could I get Your Majesty to help warm my hands?

With this said, I slip my chin into my cloak, and the smile at the corner of my mouth instantly fades away.

Victor’s hand is much colder than mine. Taking a deep breath, I grip his hand even tighter, and together, we step into this pure white world.

──────────

The chilly breeze howls as Victor and I tread through the snow, neither of us uttering a word. [5]

Reminiscent of a wanderer losing its way, the mist hangs over the frigid ground and eventually dissipates into the pale grayish expanse above.

Victor suddenly loosens his hold on my hand.

Victor: Didn’t you want to showcase your skills to me? Why aren’t you going yet?

I cast a brief glance at the mounds of snow under the trees, nod in silence, and reluctantly let go of his hand despite my heart breaking. [6]

MC: Well, Your Majesty, please wait for just a short while.

I tighten Victor’s cloak for him, then dash to the snowdrifts and begin building a snowman.

My hands move at a blazing pace. There is only a single thought circling in my mind right now, and that is to swiftly end this time-wasting game and return to his side as fast as possible.

To add to my woes, the newly fallen snow proves challenging to shape, much like bleached wool. Despite my vigorous efforts to press the snow together time and again, the snowballs continue to fall apart, each and every time.

A mix of vexation and restlessness churns in my heart. I have nearly exhausted all the strength left in my body to mold the snowballs, and both my hands are now aching from the cold.

Victor: [with endless helplessness] Dummy, no one is competing with you for first place. There’s no need to be in such a rush.

Subconsciously, I pause in my movements, turn my head, and find him gazing at me with a serene expression.

The urgency and anxiety in my heart seem to find equilibrium, and my hands unconsciously settle into a steadier motion.

Regrettably, the snowman I end up crafting doesn’t even qualify to be described as “adorable.” Even so, Victor earnestly lowers his head, observing it with the bearing of a connoisseur appreciating a gem.

Victor: To create this shape without it falling apart is indeed a testament to skill.

His teasing remark elicits a chuckle from me. I pick up a twig and walk over to him.

MC: There’s still one last step, but it requires Your Majesty and me to complete it together.

Placing the twig in his hand, I then hold onto his hand, and together, we draw eyes and a mouth on the snowman’s face.

Victor chuckles softly, and conversely, he grasps my hand, guiding it to make strokes.

Victor: You’re holding so tightly; its eyes are all crooked now.

Looking at the snowman with its enlarged eyes due to our modifications, I’m just about to crack a few jokes when I notice a touch of weariness on Victor’s face.

MC: We’ve almost completed the snowman. Would you like to rest for a while?

Victor: I know a tavern. Come with me.

We’ve arrived at the alley where we met that kitten before. It has undergone a complete transformation, and the newly opened tavern is bustling with patrons.

It’s a snowy day, and the tavern is filled to capacity. I initially thought that there would be no seats available. However, the owner leads us straight into a room.

MC: Huh? Did you reserve the room with the owner in advance? But you weren’t...

Victor brushes away the snowflakes off my head, seeing through my puzzlement.

Victor: I arranged it in advance, yes.

Victor: Since I didn’t know when I would be awake, I told the owner beforehand that I would have this room reserved for as long as it snows.

The fire in the hearth produces a crackling sound. Victor’s facial features are enveloped in the cloud of heat, his eyes gentle.

Victor: I just thought that one day, I would take you out to see the snow.

We sit on the terrace, sipping the warm wine. Amidst the aroma of wine wafting in the air, he speaks in a soft tone.

Victor: I did stick my tongue to a cup in the past. It happened when I was five years old and had a taste of my father, the king’s red wine in secret. My mother, the queen, had gotten quite the shock.

MC: Eh? What are you talking about...

Victor: Dummy, aren’t you always clamoring about wanting to hear my stories?

He says it as if it were the most natural thing, as if this were merely an ordinary winter day, as if we were an ordinary married couple offhandedly conversing about our everyday life while enjoying a drink and keeping ourselves warm by the fire.

The north breeze makes my eyes sting, but I still force myself to smile as I look at him.

MC: So, it turns out that His Majesty was a dummy, too, when he was five years old. How about when you were six? What was it like?

Victor: When I was six...

In the back-and-forth questions and answers, more than twenty years of Victor’s life have become etched in my mind.

I dare not listen. I can’t help but feel as if once I’ve heard everything, he will leave me. And yet, I listen carefully to every single word.

I listen to the way he speaks each word— the way his teeth collide, the way his two lips meet, the way the nuances of his trailing notes alter between closing and releasing.

Victor: Next, it’s the day when I got married to a certain someone.

MC: ...there’s no need to tell the next part of the story. After all, the stories related to me have only begun.

Victor pauses, but doesn’t follow up my words with a playful remark.

MC: ...Victor?

Victor: What’s wrong?

I shake my head, and when I open my mouth again, the name that has been lingering on the edge of my lips and weighing on my heart spills out involuntarily.

MC: Victor.

Victor: Mm, I’m here.

He tacitly acquiesces to my almost naïvely foolish behavior, responding to my call of his name over and over again. It feels as though, if only I can keep confirming like this, the hole in my heart would be filled.

MC: ...Victor.

This time, he doesn’t speak. The silence forces me to stop.

MC: [sobbing] I just want to know... what can I do to make you stay... [7]

Victor sighs softly and beckons to me.

I lean over and nestle in his frigid arms.

As if he can no longer support the weight of his long, ink-black eyelashes, he casts his gaze downward. His nearly translucent skin appears as if it’s about to blend with the sunlight.

Victor reaches out and touches my cheek, his finger pads caressing the contours of my face with utmost gentleness, as if sketching my features.

His fingertips carry with them the chill of death, making me shiver involuntarily.

Slowly and stiffly, I weave my words together, but the sentences that come out of my mouth are still shakily out of tune.

MC: [teary-eyed x1] Victor, do you find it a little chilly? Maybe your cloak is too thin?

MC: [x2] The fire is obviously burning so strongly, and the mead is also very warm... [8]

MC: [x3] Look, there’s a kitten on the eaves over there. Isn’t it the one we met that day?

MC: [x4] It looks so lively today. Seems like its frame of mind is as cheerful as ours.

When I utter the last sentence, I hear his gentle sigh.

At the same time, the laughter of playful children chasing each other, the chatter of young people, and the sighs of emotions of the elderly can be heard amidst the wind and snow.

Victor: Hear that, the sounds outside.

The sunlight seeps through the terrace, haloing and enveloping the surroundings with a layer of warm and bright haze.

Bathed in that glow, my body’s consciousness returns little by little. I tightly clutch his hand, no longer shaking.

MC: [x5] I can hear it. It’s almost New Year, and the streets are bustling and serene.

Victor: The snowfall this year is promising. So, the harvest will be abundant next year.

MC: [x6] Yes, people will become more affluent and happier.

Victor: You will be a part of it all, too, and that’s really good.

I bury myself in his chest, silently listening to the rhythm of his heartbeat, one beat after another.

The heartbeat in my ears, following its rapid pace, begins to grow increasingly feeble. A realization dawns on me, and I force myself to lift my head and look at him.

He is akin to a wan rose, wilting before my desperate eyes that seek to make him stay, withering within my outstretched arms as I reach out to hold on.

From limbs to blood, to the light in his eyes— bit by bit, the luster fades.

My king entrusts the future of this country to me, and then he steps out of time, heading toward eternal peace.

I gently incline my body, kissing his peacefully closed eyes.

MC: ...good night.

This time, I don’t receive any response from him, but the snowstorm suddenly ceases.

The curtain of the evening has already descended, and the vermillion sun sinks below the horizon. The final ray of the splendid afterglow thaws the ice and snow of the land.

MC: Victor, I will take you to witness the tomorrow of this kingdom.

──────────

[Notes]:

[5] The exact phrase here actually was “冷风呜呜作响,” which literally means “the chilly breeze is producing a mournful sound”-- the “呜呜” used here is the onomatopoetic word for “sobbing/ wailing.” wanted to include this note as an example to gush about the brilliant atmospheric descriptions LZY writers use, e.g., the picture painted here echoes that even the nature is mourning at this slow, rather unfair, transition, mirroring the heroine’s and LZY’s pain of parting. ༎ຶ‿༎ຶ

[6] The expression used here is “依依不舍,” one of my favorite phrases and hated ones to translate LOL. You’d usually see this phrase being translated as “reluctant/unwilling,” but it doesn’t even come close to expressing the depth of its meaning. The phrase means “reluctance to part with sb you love/ being broken-hearted at having to leave,” with an underlying tone of “wanting to be with that person regardless,” -- and I tried to retain the OG meaning without being too wordy haha~

[7] Not sure how much of the sentiment I could make it come across in the translation—the term (留住) MC uses here literally means “ask sb to stay/ keep sb for the night/ ask them to wait.” the beauty of it lies in the fact that it expresses such a multitude of emotions— desperately wanting to keep sb in your life despite knowing it’s not up to either of you so you want to know if they can wait for you even though you know it’s not possible~ ༎ຶ‿༎ຶ

[8] Mead (蜂蜜酒), also known as honey wine, is a type of alcoholic beverage made by fermenting honey mixed with water and other fruits. You can google it to know about it in detail if you want LOL.

──────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────

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caesurables · 5 months

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Happy Birthday dear Lucien~ 🥹💖

#mica draws #mlqc #mr love queen's choice #mr love mobile #恋与制作人 #lucien #lucien xu #许墨

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caesurables · 5 months

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[CN] MLQC’s Lucien Reunion Date English Translation

⚠️ SPOILER ALERT!! ⚠️

This post contains a detailed spoiler for a date that has not been released in EN yet! Feel free to notify me if there are any mistakes in the translation~

Lucien’s 2023 CN Birthday Event (The New World)✧ Birthday Story | Birthday Prologue | Birthday Date (You're here!) | ASMR | Birthday Party

It turns out that on a day like this, I'm allowed to have both loneliness and warmth at the same time.

Translation under the cut~

Special thanks to @/ivioivioivi for helping me translate some sentences. I am really thankful that you replied to my messages even in odd hours :"D.

[T/N: I don't want to break the flow, so I'll say it now. You need to at least read Lucien's 3rd birthday date and phone call (Looking Back Date+ Saplings of Love Phone Call) first to understand half of the date. It's even better if you've read all of his birthday dates and birthday R&S/stories. YEARS worth of build-up pays off wonderfully and painfully on this date :". Some non-birthday dates that get referenced/I think are important to understand his growth are:

Standstill date (I forgot the official EN localization of this date, so here is the fan translation ver of it. The 'old game' in this Reunion Date is a reference to this date).

Wild Luxury Date (not a direct reference, but MC's idea to book a B&B for his birthday can be traced back to them going to a wild luxury hotel LOL. Because of the 'memorable things' that happened here, they've been exploring many kinds of hotels ever since then.

Tidying-up date (The date dives deep into how Lucien dealt with his pain and grief- that is, by trying to abandon them because he didn't know any better, there's no time to slow down and properly deal with it :". But because of the 'complex feeling' (that he FINALLY got to understand in Reunion Date) he's unable to do so.

Also, a casual reminder that his birthday is also his parents' death anniversary since they got into a car accident during his 7th birthday- it'll come into play on this date ;).

ANYWAY, this date is such a TREAT for ppl who have been liking him for years and watching him grow slowly.

[Subtitled Video Ver - TURN ON CC]

youtube

VERY recommended to follow along with the voice acting for a more complete experience! It's just that he never sounded this vulnerable before :"". And BGM choice is really superb hhhh. I don't expect them to use that angsty BGM from last anniv.

[Transcript Ver]

I'm looking at the phone screen with one minute left on the countdown and placing the candle into the cupcake I secretly baked in the evening.

MC: 51, 52, 53......

I silently count the time, and at the last second, I push Lucien's study door open and turn off the lights.

MC: Happy birthday to you~

MC: Happy birthday to Professor Lucien, the smartest professor in the world~

The dim candlelight gently illuminates Lucien, who is sitting at the desk. He seems stunned for a moment, but soon, a joyful smile fills his eyes.

Lucien: So, the idea of celebrating my birthday at a B&B was just part of your surprise.

MC: I can't have you guessing everything. I still need to prepare some unexpected surprises for the birthday boy.

It's rare that Lucien doesn't have to go on a business trip this year, and there are no additional work assignments at the institute.

So, I booked a B&B in advance, taking two days off together. We'll celebrate his birthday while enjoying a brief vacation.

I smile and place the cupcake on the table, brushing away the strands of hair that hang in front of his eyes.

MC: And since we're both on vacation, every second from now on is worth celebrating.

MC: So, it's now a special midnight blessing time~

Lucien: [chuckles] And what blessing are you going to give me?

He wraps his arm around my waist, allowing me to sit on his lap.

His deep pupils dive into the depths of my eyes along our pressed foreheads, and even our breaths become intimate.

MC: Hmm... Midnight blessings mark the beginning of your birthday, so I'll start by wishing you... to be yourself on this day.

His pupils briefly contract, and it seems like even his breath has slowed down a bit.

MC: Usually, we often do things we don't particularly like for various reasons.

MC: Whether it's playing a role or fulfilling responsibilities, life is often filled with many “have to's”.

MC: But the privilege of a birthday means that today, you are the most important person in the world.

MC: So, on this day, do everything you want to do and be as comfortable as you can be.

MC: That's my midnight blessing.

The candlelight light is long, silently enveloping both of us and turning this small space into the whole world.

Lucien: (whispers hoarsely) Then I'll accept it.

His warm breath touches my lips, lingering into the first long trailing note of a wish.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

After he blows out the candle and finishes the cake, I follow his wish and nestle into Lucien's embrace.

I occasionally use my gaze to trace his face. Although I don't know what he's busy with, I'm happy to spend every moment with him.

Spending it in silence is fine too.

Lucien: Several student papers that I was helping to mentor were sent over just in time. I'll finish them quickly.

MC: Take your time reading them~ This way, I'm also absorbing the essence of wisdom.

He arches his eyebrows, leans against my head, and then shifts his gaze back to the screen.

The mouse wheel sound bears witness to the continuously flipped text, and suddenly, I detect a brief moment of silence.

Lucien appears to have no reaction. His gaze is lingering and seems to have also frozen in this moment.

Did he encounter any problems?

I tilt my head and find the cursor paused beside a cited reference, flickering silently.

An obscure and minuscule string of English appears in the lower corner, with only "1996.98~99" discernible.

Lucien: MC.

MC: Lucien?

Our simultaneous saying left me momentarily stunned, and he seemed to be surprised as well. The hold around my waist tightened imperceptibly.

MC: What's wrong?

Lucien: (tenderly) Nothing, I just wanted to call your name.

Lucien: In order to give you my undivided time for the next two days, I just need a little more time.

Lucien: (softly) You go ahead and sleep.

MC: (smiles) Don't stay up too late then.

With a familiar warmth beside me, I don't say much. I simply raise my head and lightly peck his lips, only to realize that he hasn't let go of my hand.

Lucien: Just stay by my side, I'll take care of getting you back into bed with me.

—-------------------------------------------------------

When the alarm clock goes off, I sleepily roll over and discover that the other side of the bed is empty.

The hour hand has just pointed to six o'clock, and I shake off my drowsiness, getting up to search for Lucien's figure.

MC: Did he leave this early? There isn't anything urgent at the research institute, is there…

I'm contemplating whether to send him a message when the door is pushed open.

Lucien is uncharacteristically dressed formally, and I wonder how long he's been outside as he's covered in the chilly air of early autumn.

He probably doesn't expect me to wake up so early, but he just stands there indifferently.

It's as if he's stripped away all emotions and turned into a blank slate in human form.

Somehow, I don't ask him where he went. Instead, I walk over and instinctively take hold of his somewhat stiff and cold hand, placing it against my own face.

MC: Why didn't you wear a scarf? Come here quickly-

Before I can finish speaking, he envelops me in his embrace.

It's an incredibly tight embrace.

Lucien doesn't say anything, yet it's as if he's telling me something.

I simply tighten my hug, letting this silence continue.

The chill fades away as if bidding farewell, and the person in my embrace slowly opens his mouth.

Lucien: (quietly) MC, I went to do something very important.

Lucien: It feels like I'm years late, but fortunately, nothing has changed.

I can't see Lucien's face at this moment, but I can only feel his voice, soft as if not wanting to disturb a certain tranquility.

Lucien: But because of this, I seem to have some new questions.

Lucien: Can you help me with these things I haven't quite figured out yet?

He speaks vaguely, yet there's a genuine sincerity in his words.

A vague idea forms in my mind, something that I can't pin down, but I don't want to put off either.

I gently brushed his bangs with my fingers and looked at him calmly.

MC: Of course, I'm willing to help. How do you want me to help you?

This question seems to have stumped Lucien. He ponders for a while and then smiles helplessly.

Lucien: I don't know either.

MC: Well, it's wonderful. The world has left you with a special puzzle on your birthday~

Lucien that's somewhat at a loss makes me unable to suppress my laugh.

MC: It's okay. After all, growing up doesn't necessarily mean always moving forward. I'll help you find the answers.

—-------------------------------------------------------

I lead him into the living room, where the golden sunlight streams over the horizon, casting its glow upon us.

MC: But since student Lucien doesn't have a direction, I'll have to guide you in my own way, so you better cooperate with me.

Lucien: I'm more than willing, Teacher MC.

MC: Very well. First... let's start by filling our bellies!

—--------------------------------------------------------

After eating, as Lucien places the suitcase in the trunk, I suddenly recall something and retrieve the car cooler from the storage room.

Lucien: It seems that Teacher MC is indeed well-prepared.

MC: Hehe, I must protect my main course well~

And this way, you can go wherever you want.

I don't want to impose any pressure on him, so I simply think to myself and smoothly take the driver's seat.

MC: Today, let me be the escort for the birthday star.

Lucien: What if I also wish for MC to enjoy herself?

MC: You can't use the blessings I gave you against me!

I laugh and pinch his nose. Before starting the car, I come up with a great idea.

MC: Let's play an old game.

Lucien: Aren't we supposed to go to the B&B you booked?

MC: We have plenty of time, so we can have some fun before heading to our destination.

MC: No need to rush, taking it slow is also good. It's also the birthday star's privilege.

Lucien: [chuckle] I can't help but want to be this willful birthday star every day now.

MC: In that case, I'm fully on board!

I grip the steering wheel with both hands, waiting for his response.

MC: So, what's the number in your mind?

Lucien: How about... 389?

MC: Got it!

I enter the number into the map app and, without any reservations, start the car towards the unfamiliar location 18 kilometers away.

I don't drive too fast along the way. Rather than rushing to the destination, it's more about enjoying the scenery along the route. I ask him for the next random number when we encounter red lights.

MC: When did they start repairing the bridge here?

Lucien: It seems they started construction last year, and judging by the progress, it should be completed within the next six months.

Lucien: I hadn't noticed that park over there before.

MC: I remember that this place used to be a lake?

Lucien: Mm, they probably redesigned the walkway, and it seems like cars aren't allowed in anymore.

With Lucien's various choices, we leisurely travel the road, watching this extremely familiar city give birth to new branches in unfamiliar corners.

Time has always been silent, seeping into every crevice, every building, every plant, and every person's face.

The city also seems to be growing up with us, shedding a certain part of itself and transforming into something more fresh and new.

And as Lucien and I walk through these changes together, it's hard to say whether I feel more nostalgia or anticipation.

Until the red light appears, I have no idea where I've driven us to.

In the unfamiliar scenery, warm light falls upon Lucien's face.

MC: Now, do you have any places you'd like to go or things you'd like to do?

This time, I didn't ask him for a random number but instead posed a question during this brief moment of silence.

Perhaps it's only after walking many paths that you'll discover the one you want to take.

The red light flickers and the countdown numbers slowly extend into his field of vision.

Lucien: I want to... look at the flowers.

—-------------------------------------------------------

Under Lucien's guidance, we continued to drive for a while.

The unknown world gradually added familiar sights, and the road ahead also widened.

The road of the old street is wider than it was three years ago, as if it had been freshly paved with asphalt, shining brightly in the sunlight.

Heading uphill all the way, not far ahead, I can vaguely see a massive white building.

Unlike the last time, Lucien confidently directs the way this time—until we park in the parking lot next to the white building.

In the distance, the hills and fields are vibrant, and osmanthus flowers dance silently in the wind like tiny specks of light.

They complement this massive white building, radiating splendid beauty, which makes my eyes well up with emotion.

It turns out that something new has already bloomed on that empty lot.

MC: So, this hospital has already been built…

Lucien: Um, it will officially open to the public in a few months.

Lucien shows no intention of getting out of the car and calmly gazes ahead.

I also follow his gaze. The hospital is surrounded by hills and forests, and we listen to the distant chirping of insects, telling the secrets of the wilderness.

The wind rustles through the leaves, and the lush greenery and deep red hues cast beautiful light and shadow under the sunlight.

MC: Were these trees here before?

Lucien: I believe they were also transplanted here in the past two years.

I lean against the steering wheel, looking at the scenery in front of me that is entirely different from what I remember, and I can't help but not know how to describe my feelings.

MC: Can a hospital be built so quickly?

Lucien: Of course, it's even faster since this hospital is a crucial project for expanding clinical teaching bases in Loveland City.

He said it naturally, causing my gaze to unconsciously shift back at him.

Perhaps my gaze is too probing, so Lucien casually slumps down on the right side of the dashboard.

Lucien: Actually, I've been here a few times before due to work reasons.

Lucien: While their primary research focus is orthopedics, they also want to incorporate related studies in neuroscience to treat more complex and critical diseases.

Lucien: That's why the hospital director approached me for a collaboration.

MC: You surely agreed, right?

Lucien: Do I appear so easy to persuade?

MC: You're far from being easy to persuade.

I reach out and gently caress his cheek that's nestled between his arms.

MC: (smiles softly) It's clear to me that you've always known what you want to do.

In the sunlight, Lucien seems to smile more comfortably. He nuzzles my palm, bringing himself closer to me.

Lucien: Although they are still lacking in clinical expertise in neuroscience, Lucien's Bioscience Research Center has already signed an agreement with this hospital.

Lucien: I will provide them with the necessary research theoretical support.

Lucien: However, to bridge some gaps, I recommended one of my former classmates from my doctoral program to them. Whether they can persuade him to join depends on the efforts of the hospital director.

Lucien appears nonchalant, but I can hear so much sentiment in his words.

It's Lucien's own research institute that concluded the collaboration, and even though he's aware of the shortcomings on the other side, he still chose to cooperate.

He probably unconsciously hopes that the things that are growing anew on that land will turn into something even more beautiful.

Perhaps because I've been staring at him, Lucien seems to have also understood the unspoken words I haven't uttered.

Lucien: The reason I agreed may be because, at some moment, I felt like I had touched upon a coincidence called fate.

MC: Should scientists believe in these things?

Lucien: [chuckle] It's needed once in a while.

We can't help but laugh together.

MC: How about we get down and go for a walk?

MC: Perhaps fate has other words to speak within this coincidence.

While that's what I'm saying, I actually don't know what else fate might have to say.

We don't enter the hospital; instead, we aimlessly stroll around.

That empty lot is no longer just a distant memory, nor does it remain stagnant in its place.

We walk up the hill and see a slightly small but uniquely looking shop by the side of the side road.

It quietly nestled amidst the woods directly facing the hospital, the rich aroma of coffee blending gently with the scent of fresh grass.

MC: This shop is also new, right?

Lucien: Indeed, I didn't expect a new coffee shop to open here.

Our gazes collide, and in each other's eyes, we see the same expectation.

MC: Let's go check it out then!

The simple and elegant decor made the whole café look clean and bright.

There's only one owner in the store, even though it's not yet opening time, she warmly welcomed us.

Owner: I didn't expect to have customers at this time.

Owner: The sunshine is lovely today. Why don't you two sit over here and enjoy the beautiful scenery?

She says as she leads us to a floor-to-ceiling window on the south side. Looking at the scene in front of me, I unconsciously hold my breath.

Emerald green, golden yellow, and crimson red – time unfolds the colors it has painted to depict life in front of this window.

It's as if the four seasons silently cycle, but at this moment, it kindly extends all of its vistas, leaving the shadow of time here.

Owner: Not far away, they've built a new hospital, and it seems the director is very environmentally conscious as they've planted many trees in the vicinity.

Owner: Looking out of this window, there are two very special trees, and I observe that only during this season of the year is there such a unique view.

MC: ...It's really beautiful, thank you for your recommendation!

After thanking the boss, we're sitting in front of that window.

Lucien gazes out of the window, slightly lost in thought. The colorful light and shadows fall delicately on him, as if embracing him, sinking him into the shade of the trees.

MC: I wonder if this place is directly facing the window where the little boy used to be.

He pauses for a moment and looks at me amidst the gorgeous display.

MC: At this moment, can we also see the four seasons in his eyes when he looks outside the window?

Lucien: (smiles while looking away) Probably so.

Lucien: After all, it's what has grown anew on this land.

His voice is heavy and resolute.

MC: That's wonderful.

Lucien: Hmm?

MC: They are so beautiful, it's truly wonderful.

Memories are now distant and unattainable, but they still remain here. And in such a birthplace, all the beauty that has grown is so delightful.

MC: Perhaps this painting-like scenery is also a gift from fate to you.

Beneath the play of light and shadow, the girl's face is filled with the colors of sunshine, and she smiles warmly.

Lucien always feels that the emotions that he couldn't figure out the answer to seem to open a small crack, allowing even more indescribable feelings to pour out.

When discussing the collaboration compensation, he proposed donating two trees in the name of the research institute as a partial substitute for the hiring fee.

At every moment when he came here alone, he could clearly feel the spreading branches and twigs.

Perhaps, the meaning of time lies in the fact that nothing stays in one place, and this is also a form of trace and continuity.

It's just that, some changes would be better if they happened slower.

He always selfishly thinks this way.

Lucien: Probably... it really is a gift, isn't it?

Lucien: However, there may be more to it than just fate.

The colorful world is distant yet clear, all frozen in the eyes.

Because of you, I can see the traces of time so clearly.

It turns out that everything has passed for so long, long enough that I'm almost forgetting the name of this feeling.

It turns out that on a day like this, I'm allowed to have both loneliness and warmth at the same time.

It turns out that what I felt was sadness.

—--------------------------------------------------------

=Flashback Start=

The cemetery in the early morning is dark and solemn, with only a few stars twinkling in the sky.

The streets at four o'clock were too deserted, so Lucien bought a particularly simple bouquet of flowers from a newly opened stall at the door.

He passed through the freshly painted iron gate and walked slowly along the gravel path.

The paper's reference seemed to pull him into the light and shadow of time that he couldn't speak or think of yet also couldn't forget.

There were always two busy figures, always smiling with their eyes forever gazing into the distance.

These long-ago scenes that feel more like yesterday are strangling his breath and cutting open his wound today.

The time devoured by enduring anxieties of emptiness returns in its entirety today, as it does on all other 'todays'.

Some kind of longing dug into the wound, causing him to suddenly pause before tucking the girl in his arms into the quilt.

He pondered for a long time, and in the end, he decided to put on a suit.

That period of time was like this road, neither long nor short, but he spent many years on it.

Lucien stopped before the graves, gazing at the familiar names on it, and heaved a long sigh.

What should he say? He didn't know.

He simply gently placed the flowers down and reached out to touch the name on the tombstone.

The dust had settled in the gaps, and he cleaned it meticulously, even those stubborn stains were carefully wiped away.

He silently gazed at those two clean names, looking at them again and again.

Lucien: I seem to... miss both of you.

Today belongs to both of you, yet it also feels like it belongs to me.

When I abandon my name, I can treat it as a day that only belongs to me.

Now that I stand before you, does it mean that the distant past has slowly arrived at my side?

When I leave, the time left for you both will come to an end, and the time ahead should be reserved for her, or maybe for the me who's blessed by you.

Is that okay?

Lucien knew that no one would provide him with an answer. He simply sat there, no longer dwelling on anything.

He didn't know how long he had been sitting there, until the slowly approaching light from the distance began to illuminate him.

=Flashback End=

—--------------------------------------------------------

MC: You can open your eyes now!

Lucien opens his eyes under my guidance, and I happen to collect the last decoration.

Lucien: The issues troubling me seem to have somewhat disrupted your preparations.

MC: That's not entirely true.

Noticing that Lucien has picked up on some clues, I place the cake on the small couch and pull him down to sit.

MC: No matter how grand the birthday celebration is or how it is celebrated, the focus should be on the person who is celebrating it.

MC: You are the most important.

MC: Everything I've done is simply in the hope that they can appear more fittingly before you.

The warm light falls on the small arched couch, enclosing our figures leaning against the glass within it.

Outside, it started raining at some point, the raindrops hitting gently against the window. Much like the indescribable feelings, the world was shrouded in a misty haze.

Lucien: It feels like we're inside an egg here.

MC: Right? I think so too.

MC: So, let's just imagine we've briefly returned to the state before venturing into the human world and taking a rest here.

Lucien: Hmm, what's outside the window then?

MC: Outside the window is the place we'll go to.

MC: It might rain today, it might be clear tomorrow, or there might be a sandstorm.

MC: Every day, the weather will be different, there will be many sad things, and there will also be many happy moments.

Lucien: Can sadness and happiness... exist at the same time?

MC: Of course they can.

MC: Because they are both important to you.

I gently stroke his brow and gaze deeper into him through those eyes filled with emotions.

Lucien: (in the most fragile tone you ever hear-) ….Then, can you hug me?

I don't speak; instead, I answer him with my actions.

Perhaps I had also waited for a long time, waiting for him to come to me, letting me accompany him and giving me the right to comfort him.

Lucien: I went to meet some very important people today.

MC: Um.

Lucien: I miss them very much.

MC: Mm.

Lucien: But I feel happy again because of you.

I bite my lower lip hard and feel my eyes slightly welling up.

Lucien: I don't know how to handle these emotions, but I also feel a bit childish like this.

MC: I don't think so. I really like you just the way you are now.

MC: Being candid and clumsy, like a child without any worries. It's a kind of growth for you too.

Lucien: But today is obviously my birthday, isn't?

MC: It's precisely because today is your birthday that you can be like this.

I can't help but hug him even tighter.

MC: Sometimes, I feel as if we're growing up like layers of an onion, with each year wrapped around the last.

MC: Even though you're growing older, you still have all the previous ages you've been.

MC: You are also the 26-year-old Lucien, the 20-year-old Lucien, the 18-year-old Lucien, the 14-year-old Lucien – you are every version of yourself from different time periods.

MC: So, you can think rationally, but you can also be indifferent; you can be passionate, yet feel discouraged at times.

MC: When we grow up, we don't abandon ourselves. Every version of you from the past is still within your heart.

MC: You will see them, comfort them, and accept them.

Behind me, Lucien is silent, but the slightly tightened arms seem to quietly reveal something.

MC: What did the ten-year-old Lucien do today?

Lucien: Mm... I read a very special book.

MC: And what about the fourteen-year-old Lucien?

Lucien: I went to Venice, took photos at the Bridge of Sighs, and accidentally dropped my camera.

MC: Hmm, and what about when you were seventeen?

Lucien: Spent an entire night in my own independent laboratory.

MC: Wow, you! You didn't pull an all-nighter at twenty as well, did you?

Lucien: When I was twenty… I was given a graduation ceremony that I think is a bit special now.

MC: And what about you today?

He slowly lifts his head, his soft fingertips caressing my cheek.

Lucien: I went to meet important people

Lucien: And returned to your side.

MC: So you see, today may be your birthday, but it's also a special book day and a day for a bit of luck to escape.

MC: It can be an all-nighter day or a day for sleep. It's your graduation ceremony, and it's also the day of your important people.

MC: It doesn't just belong to happiness, it simply belongs to you.

MC: Happy birthday, Lucien. You don't have to be just happy.

The droplet on the glass window reflects the candlelight, resembling burning osmanthus petals as if time itself has paused by our side.

Lucien finally smiles, his eyes sparkling.

Lucien: I think, I know what wish to make now.

He wraps my hands together in his and looks at the candlelight.

It seems like he's saying a lot of wishes, and only after a while does he rest his forehead against mine.

MC: I hope all your wishes come true.

Lucien: Well, this Miss will have to work hard because it's not just from the present me.

Lucien: I just took the opportunity to make up for all those days I forgot to make wishes.

MC: Right now, I feel like I'm accompanying the past you.

MC: Would you call me silly for feeling this way?

Lucien: (whispers softly) Of course not.

His warm lips gently cover mine, devout and solemn.

Lucien: Furthermore, for the future me, the present is my past.

At the moment the candles were blown out, the sound of fireworks bursting in the distance could be heard. Colorful fireworks exploded outside the window, decorating the night sky.

It turns out that the rain had silently stopped at some point.

Lucien: It looks like there will be fireworks outside the window.

MC: It's welcoming you.

At this moment, there are less than 10 minutes left until the end of Lucien's birthday.

I grab his hand and run out of the B&B, running onto the street.

The street scene is incredibly lively, and for some reason, the celebratory fireworks keep lighting up the night sky, leaving colorful streaks in their wake.

Pedestrians pause for a moment, and I hold Lucien's hand. We walk through the crowd and I excitedly turn back to him.

MC: Lucien, it's wonderful that you came into this world.

MC: Thank you for coming into this world, thank you for coming to my side.

Another burst of fireworks soars into the sky, and the world is so beautiful, as if gathering all the colors of this moment into his eyes.

All the accumulated emotions are like the fireworks at this moment, making him vibrant and alive.

I see him take my hand and wrap his other arm around my waist.

Perhaps this isn't even a dance, we're just embracing each other and spinning around while laughing.

It seems like only the two of us exist in the world.

Lucien: MC.

I hear him calling my name.

Lucien: Thank you, for giving me this beautiful world as a present.

MC: Then I hope even more that whether I participate in your world or not, you will have the beauty of the whole world.

Lucien: Don't worry.

Lucien's eyes are filled with a smile, and the lamp's warm glow makes him look incredibly bright.

Lucien: All my time is as dazzling as you.

[Phone Call- coming soon]

[Lux's small rambling corner]

Dying rn after two sleepless nights, so I'll say a little for now and will add more after resting for some days orz. But really, I think what makes this date good can be felt with heart. Every single sentence is golden and worth to be screaming about hnghhh.

Where should I start??? Everything about this date feels perfect. I don't even know where to begin🥹 I genuinely think this one is his best birthday date. The pay of years' worth of build-up and the metaphors are perfect, and GOD, how this date consists of everything that makes them unique and lovable to me.

I didn't anticipate that the writers would skillfully weave together past birthday dates on this occasion. Honestly, I wouldn't mind if this marks the final instance centered around the theme of the past self. Embracing every version of your past self that makes up 'you' is truly a fitting conclusion.

It's INSANE how his writers are able to build up the whole thing over the span of 6 YEARS like??? The way his change and growth happen little by little as we accompany him in those years, watching him now just being himself, frankly expressing his emotions and longing, and taking the initiative to be vulnerable for the first time, I can't help but feel emotional sob sob. Trust me, I CRIED the first time I read that part when he asked for a hug. We've seen him being vulnerable before, but him being the one who takes the initiative is an entirely different matter. I mean, Lucien????? the same guy that says he's okay when he got heatstroke???/hj.

Anyway, with each birthday, Lucien seems to discover something new. Like last year when he finally found a place that can be called home, this year, what he found was the loneliness and sadness from the past that he hid so deeply because he just didn't understand and had no time to deal with it. Now, because of his encounter with her, he is gradually able to slow down, slowly understand his feelings and emotions, and slowly accept his every past self. Like the fireworks after the long rain, his present self is alive and vibrant. Be it sadness or happiness, Lucien, I'm glad that now you can experience and accept both.

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caesurables · 6 months

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Papa Vic edit from his pet karma just because 🥹💖

#mica edits #mlqc #mr love queen's choice #mr love mobile #恋与制作人 #victor li #李泽言 #been waiting ages for this HD just so i can finish the edit and make him look so daddy smhdmsnd #also attempted to edit out the stray cat fur flying around but gave up on the ones near his hands lmao

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caesurables · 6 months

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“….you’re punishing me, right?”

#mica doodles #mlqc #mr love queen's choice #mr love mobile #恋与制作人 #lucien #lucien xu #许墨 #i just hav so many feels about this particular scene from Lux’s translation pf Poison date skshskh #the despair lucien feels and guilt over being the ome who created that poison that ultimately killed his lover/wife sidhejdn #the way he tried so hard to create a cure and the hopelessness he felt when it didnt work and that he could only watch #as her life slowly slipped away before his very eyes #and the way he decided in the end that it wasnt worth going on with life without her djdhwjsh #(;´༎ຶД༎ຶ`)#there’s a lot more i wanna say about this date but jdndjdhsj

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caesurables · 6 months

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[CN] MLQC Lucien’s Poison Date translation (Part 1/2)

⚠️ SPOILER ALERT!! ⚠️

This post contains a detailed spoiler for a date that has not been released in EN yet! Feel free to notify me if there are any mistakes in the translation~

⚠️ Content Warning: Suicide. Please proceed cautiously and prioritize your mental and emotional well-being when engaging with this material

I’ve committed unforgivable sins, drunk the incurable poison.

Your sweet voice has set my reason ablaze, beckoning me to follow you to the depths of hell.

So kiss me, my love, with those poisoned lips of yours.

[T/N: In the original CN date, XM has two ‘identities’ because of the plot. ‘Xu Mo’, the future king and MC’s late husband; and ‘Lucien’, the actor (Yes, PG used his official English name as a pseudonym). But in my translation, I will switch the use of ‘Xu Mo’ and ‘Lucien’ considering how the EN server is more familiar with the name ‘Lucien’, and the context of the date where it sets on the medieval era and the actor is said to be from the east. So, for my translation:

The late husband-> Lucien

The actor-> Xu Mo]

[T/N: another thing, Lucien often addresses MC with 夫人 (fūrén) here, and basically, it’s a rather polite address for a married woman. When the husband says it, it can be translated as ‘my wife’. However, if it’s not the husband that says it, it’s more of a polite title to another person’s wife, similar to ‘Madam’.]

[Subbed Video - Turn on CC!]

youtube

VERY recommended to watch the video for the complete experience. Hearing the name ‘Lucien’ being said in CN is a novel experience, and the different tone between the proud (late husband) Lucien and flattering (actor) Xu Mo is interesting lol.

[Part 1]

Can't be found in ten thousand books,

Nor has it been passed down in ten thousand poems,

The secret elixir is as sweet as honey at times, and as bitter as chicory at others;

Once you taste a drop, your soul will perish.

Kiss me, with those poisoned lips of yours.

The scattered sound of horseshoes lightly tapping on cobblestones, along with people's cheers and whispered conversations, pierced through the carriage curtains and drifted into my ears.

Passerby A: I can't believe that aloof Cardinal is willing to leave the monastic order for the sake of love!

Passerby B: Tsk, what love? I heard this is all arranged by the Pope and the King; the bishop hasn't even met the princess.

Passerby A: Huh? You can get married without ever having met?

Passerby B: Aren't most of these political marriages like that? By marrying the princess, the bishop will become the king in the future!

MC: ….

I quietly clenched the hem of my skirt and closed my eyes tightly.

Of course, I know that my marriage to Lucien is simply a collaborative arrangement between my father and the Pope.

Both sides needed to gain more power and more significant influence, so they decided to merge their 'treasures' into one.

No one really cares about the thoughts of the two protagonists in this marriage- except me.

??: Princess, you seem a bit nervous?

The warm voice coming from the opposite seat seemed to be imbued with magic as if it could capture my breath the moment they spoke.

I was startled and immediately opened my eyes, just in time to meet his gaze.

The cardinal in front of me still sat upright like a priest, but he was no longer dressed in the solemn cassock and looked more like a prince from a fairy tale.

A flush of heat surged up my cheeks, and I stammered as I shook my head.

MC: N-No, I'm not nervous…

My marriage partner sitting in front of me suddenly smiled.

Lucien: The princess need not fret. Just know that God blesses our union.

MC: Um, I know. But what I care about isn't the blessing of the gods, but… it's…

Lucien: What is it then?

His gaze was deep and focused, and I felt defenseless after just a second of eye contact. When I spoke again, my voice was as faint as a whisper.

MC: Lucien, actually, the first time I saw you in the cathedral, I…

Lucien: Shh, we're at the cathedral now.

Lucien extended his index finger, silently halting the words I was about to say next.

At this moment, the carriage had stopped in front of a long staircase covered in flower petals, and welcoming drums filled the air.

Lucien: Let's save the rest for after the ceremony. Step out of the carriage now, Princess.

Lucien was about to open the carriage door when I suddenly grabbed his sleeve, causing him to turn back with a hint of surprise.

Lucien: Princess?

MC: (blushing) I….

I knew I shouldn't have dwelled on the confession I couldn't finish earlier. The fleeting thought was insignificant compared to the upcoming ceremony.

MC: I…

My face turned red. But Lucien smiled as he gently turned his wrist and pinched my fingers.

Lucien: MC, don't worry, my heart is the same as yours.

He unexpectedly understood all my anxieties and expectations. He placed my fingertips gently against his lips, treasuring and tender.

Lucien: From the moment I first laid eyes on you, Princess, I…

MC: ——Liar!!

I sit up in bed abruptly, cold sweat soaking through the dress on my back.

I've lost count of how many times I've had this nightmare.

Flowers, kisses, blessings... It was such a happy scene, but every time it replayed in my mind, it only made my heart tighten.

I'm still in shock when suddenly the door is knocked twice, then pushed open, and the flickering light of a candlestick enters the room.

??: Madam, are you…?

MC: Who is it?!

The sudden voice of a man startles me, and I quickly turn towards the source of the light.

But the moment I see the face bathed in the warm yellow light, my pupils widen in shock.

Narrow eyes, soft lips, a high-bridged nose... a nearly perfect combination of features that form the face I least wanted to encounter.

MC: Lucien?

The other person noticeably freezes upon hearing my murmur. Then, he breaks into a smile.

??:[chuckles] Madam, have you mistaken me for someone else?

MC: I was mistaken…

The light flickers and I finally snap out of it.

MC: ...Right, you can't be Lucien.

The person in front of me is just a man who looks much like Lucien.

—Because my husband was secretly executed by the Pope a long time ago.

MC: Then who are you, and why are you here?

The young man who resembles Lucien smiles again at my words.

??: My name is Xu Mo.

??: I was brought back to the palace by you tonight. Have you forgotten?

MC: Tonight?

I pause for a moment. Today is the anniversary of my father's death, and I drank heavily. The Pope took pity on me and arranged for me to relax at the theater.

I've already forgotten the content of the play in my drunkenness, and the man before me, named Xu Mo... seems to be the male actor from that play.

— Could it be that I brought him back while I was drunk?

I feel a bit absurd and incredulous, so I can only let out an embarrassed cough.

MC: Even if... even if you were brought back by me, you shouldn't be here.

Xu Mo: It seems that Madam is indeed drunk. It was your request for me to guard your door tonight.

MC: ….

As he speaks, he raises the candlestick with a sincere and innocent expression, casting light on the costume he's still wearing. I become even more bewildered.

Xu Mo notices my distraction and tilts his head with concern.

Xu Mo: Madam, did you sleep poorly?

MC: What?

Xu Mo: Your appearance is worn, and you seem in constant worry, with a disordered mind. I have some knowledge of calming methods that might help you sleep.

MC: I don't need-

I forcibly suppressed the words that slipped out of my mouth.

I should refuse.

After all, I don't even know this Xu Mo; he's just a stranger actor I brought back with me.

But his face and the way he speaks are so much like Lucien…

Almost as if by some strange force, I nod.

MC: Alright, let's give it a try.

Xu Mo respectfully bows to me and retrieves a small, delicate incense burner from his pouch, placing it on the table.

Xu Mo: This is a spice from the East that can help sweep away all your worries.

Xu Mo: Close your eyes, madam. I will continue to stand guard outside the door.

The gentle voice lingers in the mist, and I sink into the feathered warmth.

Xu Mo: (whisper softly)…Fool.

In a daze, I seem to hear a sigh, and then the door closes.

[Part 2]

=Flashback start=

Lucien: The main component of this poison comes from aconitine, a plant originating from the East.

Lucien: Its flowers are quite beautiful. Would you like to see them?

Lucien carefully took out a specimen of aconite flowers. The eerie and vibrant shade of purple solidified into a thin sheet, making it impossible to look away.

MC: Such a beautiful flower unexpectedly hides such a deadly poison…

Lucien: Even though it's poison, it's also medicine. Eastern people use its roots for pain relief and treating illnesses, whereas we only use it to kill people.

As Lucien spoke these extremely dangerous words, I didn't feel a hint of fear. Instead, I found a more comfortable position in his arm.

MC: Are you trying to say whether it's poison or medicine depends entirely on the person?

Lucien:[chuckles] Yes, my wife is very clever.

The rewarding kiss landed on my forehead, and Lucien set aside the aconite specimen, picking up another piece of artwork.

Lucien: This is called "Strychnine". The poison extracted from it…

Lucien wasn't only a perfect husband but also an excellent teacher.

He taught me many knowledge areas I shouldn't have had access to, which made me feel a sense of freshness as someone who had previously only been exposed to the arts.

I flipped through the pages of previous records. I felt deeply moved and asked Lucien.

MC: With so many types of poison, what do you think is the most terrifying kind of poison?

Lucien pondered, his fingertips unconsciously leaving faint traces on the parchment.

Lucien: Me? I believe the most terrifying poison is one that is unknowable and incurable.

Lucien: Not knowing when it was administered, not knowing how to antidote it, not knowing when one might die…

Lucien: Being afflicted with such a poison is the most despairing thing.

I listen but only half-understanding it. Lucien looks at my confused expression, smiles, and gently squeezes my palm.

Lucien: Don't worry, Madam, all my poisons have their rightful place.

At that moment, the voice of a servant from outside the door reminded Lucien that it was time for him to attend to matters.

Lucien put down his book with a bit of regret, his breath lingering in my hair as if reluctant to part.

Lucien: (whispers coquettishly)Hmm, I really don't want to go…

MC: Pfft, how can the future king not attend to state affairs?

Lucien: [chuckles] Because state affairs are dull, and being with my wife is fun.

His frank love words always easily stirred my heartbeat.

The waiter outside urged again, so I had to restrain myself and push away his clasping fingers.

MC: Hurry, Father and the Pope are impatient.

Lucien cast a somewhat helpless glance at me before slowly getting up and wearing his outer robe.

He casually tidied up the messy strands of hair he had caused and gestured with his eyes toward the nearby harp.

Lucien: When I return, we won't have the pharmacology class, you will teach me to play the harp, okay?

MC: Sure, I'll prepare some sheet music. If you don't learn well, I might have to give you a "tough lesson" with a pointer stick!

Lucien: I will study hard, teacher.

=Flashback ends=

Xu Mo: You seemed to have slept well yesterday.

Xu Mo's voice brings back my thoughts, and I withdraw my gaze to look at him.

He's still wearing that costume, and there's a layer of weary darkness under his eyes - the one who didn't sleep last night is him.

I caress the silver cup he brought, and the warmth of milk inside soothes my fingertips.

MC: Why are you so eagerly attentive?

My words are so straightforward that they make Xu Mo get momentarily taken aback, but then he bends down to please me.

Xu Mo: If I can serve by Madam's side, I won't have to travel with the theater troupe anymore.

Xu Mo: Since Madam has given me an opportunity, I want to seize it.

Xu Mo's words are even more greedy and obsequious than mine, and I can't help but sneer.

MC: You should know that I am a widow.

Xu Mo: Of course, I know. Once your health is restored, His Holiness will return power to you, and you will be the most noble woman in this kingdom.

MC: Since you know that, and yet you dared to say what you just did, it seems you're not a good person after all.

Xu Mo: I never claimed to be a good person. Moreover, in this world, good people don't live long.

Xu Mo: So Madam, are you satisfied with the soothing incense from yesterday?

In just a moment, the ambition that flickered in Xu Mo's eyes overlapped with the one Lucien had once shown.

But in the blink of an eye, what remains before me is still a compliant and humble male actor.

I fall silent for a moment, then set down the slightly cooled milk and reach my hand toward him.

MC: Help me up. I want to take a walk in the garden.

Xu Mo bows deeply to me, a satisfied smile on his face.

Xu Mo: As you command, Madam.

These past few years, my body has become frail due to excessive grief.

Apart from going to the cathedral for weekly prayers, I spend my time alone in the study, reading books. It's been a long time since I set foot in the garden.

I sigh as I look at the withered foliage before me.

MC: The flowers have all withered…

Xu Mo: Does Madam like flowers?

MC: It's him who likes them.

The "him" in my words is obvious, and Xu Mo simply nods faintly without further inquiry.

— As a commoner aspiring to climb the social ladder, he is pretty pragmatic.

Xu Mo: Would Madam be willing to introduce these flowers to me?

MC: Why should I introduce them to you?

Xu Mo: Hmm... I suppose there's no harm since we have nothing better to do, right?

Xu Mo: I will study hard, teacher.

He unintentionally spoke the exact same words as Lucien but in a completely different tone. My fingers involuntarily tighten as I slowly respond.

MC: These are oleanders. They have a long blooming season and are quite beautiful when in full bloom. However, they are toxic if ingested, so one must be careful not to consume them…

MC: These few plants are the black datura he collected back then, very rare but equally poisonous…

I'm not a competent teacher, and my vocabulary for the introduction is dry, far less vivid, and interesting than when Lucien used to explain things.

However, Xu Mo listens with great interest. It might be my imagination, but his gaze doesn't seem to be focused on the flowers; instead, it feels like he's looking at me.

Xu Mo: ...Madam's extensive knowledge of flowers and poisons is quite impressive, a bit beyond my expectations.

MC: It's all things he told me about.

Xu Mo: I guess he must be very happy. After all, someone is willing to remember this knowledge so well.

MC: He's gone, what's the point of talking about whether he's happy or not?

The atmosphere suddenly grew colder.

Xu Mo falls silent momentarily, takes a short breath, and no longer discusses plants with me. Instead, he starts talking about peculiar stories from the streets.

He travels with the theater troupe from the East, witnessing countless fascinating customs and traditions along the way.

In terms of eloquence, he is also quite similar to Lucien.

I listen attentively without giving away my thoughts, occasionally posing a few tricky questions in an attempt to learn more about his background.

Xu Mo's answers remain seamless, without any hint of a flaw.

It's only when our walk comes to an end, and he assists me back to my seat wrapped in furs, that he suddenly smiles.

Xu Mo: Is Madam trying to see someone through me?

MC: I'm not.

As soon as the words leave my mouth, I regret them. I answered too quickly, making it seem like I was trying to conceal something.

And so, Xu Mo's smile deepens.

Xu Mo: [chuckles] It doesn't matter, as long as Madam is willing to have me serve her, I will ensure her satisfaction.

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It's always Lucien that I love.

But precisely because of that, I find myself uncontrollably searching for traces of Lucien in Xu Mo. And with each of his gestures, he becomes more and more like my late husband.

He's like a certain kind of poison that numbs my senses, making me unable to resist peering and sniffing, deliberately getting me addicted.

Very quickly, filthy rumors began to target my empty palace.

But I don't care. After my father and Lucien both died one after another, and with illness plaguing me, everyone regarded me as ominous.

So what does it matter to the world what the ominous person wants to do?

Moreover, now that Xu Mo takes care of me, my health seems to have improved a little. Even the Pope was a bit surprised when I went to the cathedral to pray this time.

The Pope: MC, may God bless you; your complexion has finally improved.

MC: Thank you for your compassion, Your Holiness.

The Pope helps me to my feet and hands me holy water.

The Pope: Once you feel better, our young queen can be crowned, and I can confidently return the kingdom to you.

I smile and don't respond to his words, simply sipping the holy water slowly.

There is still a familiar sweetness in the water, and the seal wax around the rim of the chalice can easily be accidentally ingested.

I furrow my brow tightly, and the Pope's voice continues to come from beside my ear.

The Pope: However, once you become queen, you can't be as willful as you are now.

The Pope: I heard you have taken a male companion, this could damage your reputation.

It turns out there's not much difference between the most powerful Pope and common beggars. I sneered inwardly while maintaining a respectful demeanor on my face.

MC: How could I dare to do anything immoral under the watchful gaze of God? Xu Mo is merely my servant, taking care of my daily life.

I don't want to continue discussing Xu Mo with the Pope and change the topic.

MC: By the way, my birthday is in a couple of days, and since I've been feeling better lately, I'd like to organize a celebration.

MC: Will you come?

The Pope places the silver cup containing holy water back in its place and smiles benevolently.

The Pope: I'm your second father. So of course, I will come.

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Although I said I wanted to have a good celebration, in reality, there are not many people willing to come on my birthday.

After all, in the eyes of the world, I'm just a widow without support who could die of depression at any moment, so there is naturally no need for flattery or fawning.

The simple banquet is coming to an end when Xu Mo, who has been absent for half a day, suddenly appears before me.

MC: Where have you been?

Xu Mo: Nobles' party is no place for a commoner like me.

MC: I thought you might take this opportunity to find more opportunities for yourself.

Xu Mo: Madam, your saying hurts my heart greatly and underestimates my loyalty.

He takes my wine glass with a smile, places it under his nose, and gives it a light sniff, furrowing his brow slightly.

Xu Mo: The aroma of this wine is too coarse. Please, have my glass, Madam.

Our act of exchanging glasses is too ambiguous, and at this moment, there are already malicious whispers coming from the corners of the banquet hall.

Neither Xu Mo nor I pay any attention to these voices. He hands me his cup, and amidst the fruity aroma filling the silver cup, there's a hint of bitterness. My eyelashes tremble slightly.

MC: Alright.

Xu Mo watches me finish the drink, and only then does he breathe a sigh of relief.

His gaze briefly passes over the Pope, who is surrounded by the crowd not far away, before returning to my face.

Xu Mo: I've just prepared a birthday gift for you, Madam.

MC: What is it?

Xu Mo: It's a play.

Xu Mo: I have already set up the stage, arranged the actors, and after the banquet, I will present it to…

The Pope: I presume you are the servant named Xu Mo?

The Pope's voice interrupted our conversation. The old man walks over, and his gaze sweeps over Xu Mo’s face like a knife, raising an eyebrow.

The Pope: Oh, Xu Mo, you have a face that is both... dangerous and nostalgic.

The Pope: I hope you are a loyal servant to your master so that I can rest assured.

Xu Mo respectfully bows to the Pope and speaks in a gentle tone.

Xu Mo: I am forever loyal.

The Pope: That's best. So, what were the two of you talking about?

Xu Mo: I want to perform a scene from a play for Madam, as a birthday gift for her.

The Pope: A play?

The Pope smiles at the corner of his mouth, his interest piqued.

The Pope: I wonder if I have the honor to come and enjoy your splendid performance as well?

Xu Mo looks up at me, and a hint of darkness passes through his deep, dark eyes. Then, he takes half a step forward, stops in front of me, and bows to the Pope.

Xu Mo: It'd be my honor.

Part 3 & 4-> [Here]

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