Headcanon that The Doctor is fluent in human languages and how they’re heard is actually how they’re speaking, no translation necessary, they Speak Human Good
The Master, meanwhile, is fluent in the languages yes; they’re human languages it’s not like they’re complicated; but hasn’t bothered to ‘go native’ and perfect their pronunciation because it’s such a waste of time to lower themself to that drivel when they can use their superior Time Lord technology to translate for them and make them sound however they need
Which means that The Master has a ridiculously thick High Gallifreyan accent
And since we always describe High Gallifreyan as being song-like…
-TARDIS breaks down and translation circuit is no longer functional-
Master: -speaks in high gallifreyan to the doctor-
Doctor: no, come on, we can’t do this all by ourselves, you have to include the others in the conversation as well
Master: -starts scribbling out their words on a piece of paper-
Doctor: no, we don’t have time for that! we need to figure out what we’re going to do now and don’t have time for you to sit there writing everything down; come on, i know you speak english, just say what you need to say
Master: >:(
Doctor: come on :)
Master: …
Master: -through gritted teeth-🕺🎶I’m going to fucking stab you🎶💃
was in the car with my friend when I saw the car we passed had the license plate "SADNESS" and I went oh wait we gotta slow down so I can get a pic, but every time we went slower the other car also slowed down. so I looked behind us to see what was going on and the passenger also had their phone up and wheezing the same way I was, and that's when I remembered my friend's license plate is "LOSSJPG"
Being followed by a car for 2 turns in the city: "I'm about to be murdered. Let me call my mom and write my will because this is it"
Being followed by a car for 6 hours on country highways: "The relationship between Blue Subaru and I is beyond compare. We're family. My road brother."
my cat hates taking his pills. the only way we can get him to eat them is to turn it into an elaborate pantomime - we take the packet out of the cupboard slowly and hold it up, saying “oh!! what’s this? what’s this? a TREAT? a TREAT for louis????” while making surprised faces. we offer him a pill… then, before he has a chance to sniff it, we wag our fingers at him and replace it in the packet so it becomes a Tantalising Forbidden Mystery. we continue doing this until he’s so confused and excited that he will eat the pill as fast as possible, just so he can find out what it is before we can take it away from him again. as soon as he’s eaten it he looks utterly disappointed and betrayed, like a child who just ate a delicious sweet only to find it was a chocolate-coated brussels sprout. it never gets old
I want the next offical tumblr holiday to be Fat Bear Week. I see some people posting about it but I need more hype. Please almost no one in my offline life cares about this