choosing-recovery-always

[choosing-recovery-always]

I’ve been reframing thoughts from “they could do it, but I can’t because I’m not good enough” to “they could do it and so can I because we’re both humans just trying our best”, or from “I can’t show up unless I’m perfect” to “I don’t have to be perfect, I just have to show up”, or from “the future is hopeless” to “there is hope even if I can’t see it”, or from “I will always feel this bad” to “everything is temporary”, or from “it is taking too much time to get better” to “it took time to get sick, it will take some time and patience to get better”.

But that reframing takes time too. It takes effort. It takes doing little things to make yourself feel better even when at first doing those things seems silly. Sometimes, you will fall off track, but you will get back up on your progress after resting as much as you need. Remember that this is about progression and not perfection. Remember it takes time, it takes a lot of trying, grieving, self-acceptance and self-forgiveness, but it is worth it, because little by little, you start to change, you start to get better. Don’t hold yourself to the highest of standards in your recovery, please keep in mind that you deserve to enjoy life, that you deserve to heal, that you deserve this progress, even if you’re not doing it perfectly, even if it seems slow, even if at first it feels hard to believe that you deserve good things. You don’t have to earn your healing by being perfect at it. Take your time. Rest if you must. But keep going, you’re doing great just by trying.

#recovery #self acceptance

[choosing-recovery-always]

um *finds happiness despite it all*

#I’m trying anyway #happiness #positivity

[choosing-recovery-always]

Why romanticize depression when you can romanticize recovery, learning how to enjoy things again, trying to forgive yourself and build a life you are satisfied with

#recovery

[choosing-recovery-always]

My advince on getting happier once you've gotten past the hurdles of unlearning negative self talk and shame is to actively comment on when you're happy. I do this many times a day. Worrying about the future steals your joy in the present. When you sit on a couch under a heated blanked reading memes, a simple acknolwedgement of "I am very happy right now" is the type of comment that will reclaim your joy.

#i'm gonna try this #happiness #recovery

[choosing-recovery-always]

#recovery #self love

[choosing-recovery-always]

My therapist: just because you made a plan doesn’t mean you’ll always follow it perfectly, and that’s okay. It’s better to follow a plan cursorily than not at all.

Me, sobbing: THAT WAS AN OPTION???

#recovery 

[choosing-recovery-always]

We are allowed to hate the side-effects of our meds

We are allowed to find our carers irritating to be around

We are allowed to find assistive technology awkward

We are allowed to find and mobility aids annoying and uncomfortable

Performing gratitude all of the time is exhausting, disabled people are allowed to be human

#disability #cripple punk #disability positivity

[choosing-recovery-always]

#recovery

[choosing-recovery-always]

#positivity

[choosing-recovery-always]

enemies to lovers but with myself

#recovery

[choosing-recovery-always]

It's a lot healthier to go for a daily walk than to sign up for a gym membership you won't be using because you hate that kind of exercise. It's a lot healthier to eat a frozen meal than to skip a meal because you were too tired to cook something healthy. It's a lot healthier to take a quick shower than to procrastinate an elaborate routine for days. Don't aim so high that you won't be hitting anything!

#recovery

[choosing-recovery-always]

One day, you'll be singing your favourite songs at the top your lungs as you swing around your house to its beat. One day you'll look back at the battle you are fighting today and think about how you overcame them all. One day you'll be at peace with yourself. Please hang on until you see that day.

#recovery #positivity

[choosing-recovery-always]

#recovery #growth #self love

[choosing-recovery-always]

#recovery #growth

[choosing-recovery-always]

If you’ve never been all that disobedient before, you can and should start really, really small. For example, you can wear the slightly revealing or gloriously trashy-looking garment that makes your mom roll her eyes and sigh despondently every time she sees you put it on. You will feel judged and disapproved of when you put it on, but that is fine. Your goal is to sit with the uncomfortable feelings and continue with your desired behavior anyway.  Saunter down the steps in that highlighter-yellow Garfield crop top with your chest hair flowing over the neckline, and harness as much courage as you can muster. It’s okay if you feel like a beacon of sin. Just keep it moving. Your emotions are not the target here. Your behavior is. You can feel however you are feeling in the moment so long as you keep acting like you’re free.  Do you have a favorite TV show that a partner or roommate vocally hates? Try watching that show around them without apologizing or defensively joining them in mocking the program. At first, you probably won’t be able to enjoy the show while in their presence. You’ll feel self-conscious about everything they find annoying or cringe-inducing about the show, and so focused on their reactions that you can’t relax. That’s okay. Allow those feelings of embarrassment and guilt to exist and pass through you without giving up. In time, you will be able to ignore these reactions more, and enjoy the activity.  You want to see the needle of discomfort moving down just a little, like Link’s body temperature meter in Tears of the Kingdom when he puts on a breathable outfit in a hot climate. You’re not gonna go from roiling hot to frosty cold in an instant. But after a certain point, you won’t be actively in pain anymore. Things are just gonna slowly suck less, bit by bit, until they are finally okay. That’s true of most major life adjustments, I find.  Probably the best way to develop self-advocacy skills while growing in your distress tolerance is simply by telling other people no. Do this without explanation or hedging. Nitpicky aunt wants to hear all about your dating life? “No, I don’t want to talk about that.” Unreliable ex-friend wants you to do them the tiny favor of moving their entire home gymnasium into a new third story walk-up? “No, I’m not available.” Manipulative shift supervisor wants to cajole you into sticking around for another three hours to close? “No.”  As many advice columnists smarter than me have already intoned, “no” is a complete sentence. “No” requires no explanation. “No” is not subject to debate. “No” can be repeated over and over like a broken record if a disrespectful person acts like they can’t hear it. And you can walk away at any time to make your “no” physical and impossible to argue with, when someone has proven they don’t respect your boundaries. 

you can read or listen to the full piece for free here

#i need to try to remember this #recovery

[choosing-recovery-always]

[shaking myself by the shoulders] i will get better. i will continue. i have no goddamn choice

#recovery

[choosing-recovery-always]

Stop thinking: "How can I stop feeling like that?" And start thinking: "How can I cope with this feeling? What could I do to support myself in this situation?" Find coping skills that you like and that work well for you. Try cozy gaming, drawing, tea, working out, a hot and cold shower, journaling, sour candy.

#positivity #recovery