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Vincent Van Gogh’s stream of thoughts

#paintings

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reddit is having a glitch where it puts the wrong captions over photos and it’s the only thing i care about right now

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nothing is as tender as annotating your favourite books. it’s like leaving a piece of your heart on the pages for somebody else to find.

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Sometimes I think about my best friend in my 20's response to when I told her I was envious of how talented and skilled she was cause she was always the friend that was doing a million new hobbies and just really had it together in my eyes and she seemed so disappointed in me and said how she's always been perceived as "talented" for things she was not a natural at and had actually worked tirelessly hard to learn to do and how it's never a compliment to assume someone has something you don't simply because they got lucky because more often than not they were just as capable as you and just chose to take risks, dedicate time, push through discomforts or doubts that maybe you succumb to, and really earned things that are often nonchalantly disregarded by peers as having walking in with already in hand

And I feel like that conversation really changed me cause I've always been bad at school and been a slow learner so I just sort of decided I wasn't smart and it wasn't my fault I wasn't born with the same advantages of people around me and I think that's something we all do as self protection from the truth that the only thing truly keeping us from what we want is usually ourselves and our decisions about our own narratives that aren't actually in stone even if we see them that way

I realized my friend was actually just not a quitter, and that she also felt not good enough often but decided to keep going in times where I know I would have stopped in her place

And I feel like taking ownership of my life a lot in the last few years has made me understand her better, even with stuff like chronic illness that practically begs us to victimize ourselves and then that way of thinking makes us sicker and more dependent on others when we could be accepting help without considering ourselves so helpless

It's really weird interacting with anyone once I've realized so much of that because I see my old self in people when they talk to me like I have something they don't because I am finally making different choices than I used to and honestly it is very irritating regardless of intention

If you want something someone else has that doesn't give you permission to assume how they got it or what it is even like having it - and I think more and more people have decided it's not their fault how they are choosing to live and that's why they are so stuck

#things to remember #i feel this so hard bc im so jealous of everyone and anyone i know #but also too mentally ill to rly try #even though ik its my fault in a way #i think its unfair how difficult it can be for me to do the same thing as someone else #not negating how hard theyve tried #just tht my mental illness stops me way before #and holds me in its grasps

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jar creatures

twitter/ insta/ store

#art

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Friday study session between Galileo's notebook and the mighty Gutenberg bible at Yale's Beinecke Library, the only one I hadn't visited on campus.

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holidays are made for endless reading sessions ❄️

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Back to the drawing board with some anatomy studies ~

#art

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Pocket Globe, c. 1754, twelve printed gores laid down on a plaster and wooden sphere, illustrating the northwest portion of America as Unknown Parts, cartouche reading A New Terrestrial Globe by Nath Hill 1754, fish-skin-covered wood case lined with twelve hand-colored printed gores of the celestial maps.

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Orient Express.

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(via Alessandro Michele: Der Ex-Gucci-Designer zeigt uns sein faszinierendes Zuhause in Rom | Vogue Germany)

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If you're lamenting the fact that you used to be able to shoot through a 500-page novel in like a day when you were in middle school and now you can't, it's worth bearing in mind that a big part of that is because when you were in middle school, your reading comprehension sucked. Yes, mental health and the stresses of adult life can definitely be factors, but it's also the case that reading is typically more effortful as an adult because you've learned to Ponder The Implications. The material isn't just skimming over the surface of your brain anymore, and some of the spoons you used to spend on maximising your daily page count are now spent on actually thinking about what you're reading!

#things to remember

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11/04/2024

i have this disease called "physically incapable of having boring notebooks",, but that means that i now need to start thinking of a design for my third volume </333 pinterest will be my muse for now i guess :')))

i didn't do much work today,, i'm sick and tired and sososo drained, but i made myself a coffee ((at 19h30 ??? great idea)) and i'll try to get some stuff done gently tonight :))))

bisous bisouuus ! i hope you had a productive day :*

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[via]

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Ἄρτεμις / Diana

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Details of the early morning in the volcanic Eifel

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#quotes