conlangturtle

[conlangturtle]

Hey you know how I said I was going to make a workbook on the kind of bullshit you need to do when someone you love dies? I actually did that.

HERE IS THE VERSION WITH LOTS OF SWEARING AT THE USELESS, SHITTY SITUATION YOU’RE IN.

HERE IS THE VERSION WITH A FAIR AMOUNT OF BLACK HUMOR BUT NO CURSEWORDS.

Featuring Helpful Sections such as:

Death Certificates – What you need, why you need them, and how to get them

Prepare to spend a long and miserable time on the phone

What the Everloving Fuck is Probate

Some Simple Dos and Don’ts

Shitty Mad Libs – Templates for writing Obituaries and Memorials

How to plan a non-religious death party

So you suddenly have to become some sort of hacker or some shit

This is an eighteen page book that you can print out, download, share, and give away; it is meant to be used to collect information about funeral planning and account management after a death OR you can use it BEFORE you die and give people information so they’re not stuck playing Nancy Fucking Drew while trying to keep seventeen cousins who crawled out of the woodwork from gutting each other in front of the fucking casket as they argue about who’s inheriting grandma’s favorite dentures.

It’s not exactly cheerful and it’s full of things that are probably going to feel really fucking raw if you’re processing a fresh death.

I’m sorry! I love you! Death is shitty! I’m trying to laugh about it a little and I hope you can laugh a little too because otherwise we’re all just going to cry together.

Good luck!

(in memory of my weirdo mother and her weirdo siblings who all died too fucking young and left me holding this flaming bag of dogshit)

#save

[conlangturtle]

I really hope something like this happens in NWoS, because I can't imagine Professor Hershel Layton with a gun.

Now where's Flora?

#nwos #professor layton #luke triton #Apologies to the entierty of the Layton fandom #anyway back to not posting on tumblr #Layton on the dash

[conlangturtle]

#I found this in my drafts and it makes me happy

[conlangturtle]

Me and my friend playing Xenoblade Chronicles 3 together has led to the funniest image I've ever made, in my opinion

This is not even acknowledging the marriage, family, and plan jokes we've made (There's like 9 different plans)

#Xenochefs + the guy who never dresses approprietally #Xenovhefs #Ah #yes being at the grave of your old employer #And now you're out of a job #Amazing work Gray

[conlangturtle]

I got a laptop with Windows 11 for an IT course so I can get certified, and doing the first time device set-up for it made me want to commit unspeakable violence

Windows 11 should not exist, no one should use it for any reason, it puts ads in the file explorer and has made it so file searches are also web searches and this cannot be turned off except through registry editing. Whoever is responsible for those decisions should be killed, full stop.

Switch to linux, it's free and it's good.

[conlangturtle]

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#i named Alear 'Ass' #I do not regret it eith Vander #with Clanne and Framme I do however #Fire Emblem on the dash

[conlangturtle]

#is this how splatoon went? #I don't play the game #I just know that there are fish and octopi and idols #Scheduled for the dash #Hopefully when this is posted I'll have a laptop to work on #If only I had bought out the school laptop...

[conlangturtle]

#prom got cancelled due to fire #My schools have a fire problem

[conlangturtle]

Thinking about the spiderverse movie

Everyone's just casually animated on 1sts and 2nds but then Hobie just waltzes around however Hobie wants

I watched it yesterday as an end-of-school "gift" (see: embezzling the government because the Swedish school system allows that) and the animation just appeals to me

#fucking amazing #i loved everything with Hobie #hobie brown my beloved #I have no words for what that entire movie's made me feel #like everything is just so beautifully done #hello abyss people if you see this #eve-robin rambles #AS AN ART STUDENT THE ENTIRE MOVIE IS SO DAMN INTERESTING #LIKE TAKE A LOOK AT THE EVERYTHING #THE LIGHTING #THE CHARACTER DESIGN #THE WRITING #THE MUSIC #I WISH I COULD EXPERIENCE IT FOR THE FIRST TIME BUT WITH NO SPOILERS

[conlangturtle]

Picking up Triangle strategy again and what the fuck was this twist

I feel like... if a game was to pull the secret family trope, there should at least be some buildup??

Here, we had nothing except Serenoa and [Blank]'s relationship for as long as the've been shown on screen together

I am willing to let so many twist come out of nowhere, but the secret family thing needs buildup at least

Like, c'mon

Even Fire Emblem did better, and that's (practically) an insult

#hello abyss people if you see this #triangle strategy spoilers #I'm tagging that because it feels spoilery and since it's a twist #what the fuck #I'm not even mad #just disappointed

[conlangturtle]

My god I just needs this to be somewhere that isn't in my endless google docs or my very disorganized discord

Layton, but fire emblem

Layton - Lord, Sword

Luke - Pegasus knight, can evolve (Pokémon that you?) into theirhter Falcon night, That Wyvern class pegknights could be turned into in the GBA titles, or The magic pegasus knights from awakenign (plus a healing staff, let the healers fly) Or maybe a specialised class for this purpose? If not for him, then for future luke

Emmy - Heavy knight or brawler, possibly a combo-esque class that does both

Flora - Healer, ebcause I don't know much about her but she seems the type, but she alsostarts with a weapon that can poison the enemies, no questions asked or answered

Clive - Either a Falcon night or the aforementioned specialised class that heals, starts out as an enemy but can be recruited with money if Spring and Cog haven't been hurt

desmond? descoel? one of those? des? - Myrmidon, starts out as an enemy, Kills Leon snd nobody cries about that

Claire - Mage (But she has an axe)

Randall - Also a mage (But he ahs a knife)

Dimitri . Mage (But he also has an axe)

Angela - Finally an archer

Henry - Mage again

Dalston - Heavy knight or Emmy's combo class

Raymond - Butler/maid class, he is the only one to ever get this class and it's never elaborated upon why he has this class

Chelmey - Someone needs to start on a horse

Barton - Green needs Red right? This man's blue but he's a redhead... flawed logic, replace later

Groskyv - Barbarian or Myrmydon (for the speed)

Hannah - theif or archer

Leonard - Theif

Katia - I don't know a lot about her, but same class as Anton, just a lower level

Anton - Swordmaster or Hero

I have no clue how any of this would work, I just had a thought and needed to write it down before I lost it forever

Maybe I only had it because I'm religously listening to FE music to keep away TotK and I'm currently interested in Layton. This is very cursed and will probably never be elaborated upon.

#eve-robin rambles #hhhhhhhhh #Layton on the dash #FE on the dash

[conlangturtle]

the plant ‘blindness’/plant ignorance phenomenon is genuinely tragic for so many reasons but at the same time plants get away with so much more because of it. like it’s actually very funny

#nsfw #nsft #hhhh #This is the funniest thing I've read in wuite a while kudos to you #botany on the dash

[conlangturtle]

A person who has an ao3 blog and *isn't* a virgin? impossible.

bad news anon, both of the mods fuck

[conlangturtle]

Me and my fave Pokémons 🥰

#hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh #oh my goodness the way you draw pokemon is adorable

[conlangturtle]

[conlangturtle]

Reblog and put in the tags a seemingly random (but harmless) association you make in your mind

#Cats and pineapple juice

[conlangturtle]