crimsonletter

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@mkvx

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the city life

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”I did not bow down to you, I bowed down to all the suffering of humanity.”

Crime and Punishement, Fyodor Dostoevsky

#dark academia #academia #chaos academia #litterature #gothic academia #book quotes #academia blog #russian literature #classic lit quotes #aesthetic #dostoevksy #федор достоевский #преступление и наказание

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I really enjoy the genre of “older literature featuring a really smart but deranged college student who does something really fucked up with his knowledge and has multiple breakdowns over it for the rest of the story.” one because it is entertaining and two it encapsulates the college experience in a way nothing else does.

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Anaïs Nin, from Incest: From a Journal of Love

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”He who fights with monsters should be carefull lest he thereby become a monster. And if thou gaze long into an abyss, the abyss will also gaze into thee.”

Friedrich Nietzsche, Beyond good and evil, Chapter IV, 146

#academia #dark academia #chaos academia #litterature #bookblr #gothic academia #book quotes #author quotes #academia blog #philosophy #frederick nietzsche

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I've come to a point where I have more coffee in my blood than hours of sleep.

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“Take me with you, and have pity on a blind, insane individual, who has only today had his eyes opened to his real calling. I have groped about in the darkness for a long time, and have nearly committed suicide, that is, let my talent perish.”

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Ivan Goncharov, The Precipice

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"Why do you write?" He once asked me.

"I write because not writing the scenes in my head is a lot like ignoring someone's plea to be heard. There are images and scenes on my mind the keep on playing and the only way to purge them, erase them, pacify them and let them go is by writing them out."

He was silent for a moment, before saying "is that why you keep on writing about me?"

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we could be covered in blood together if you stopped playing hard to get

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“I have suffered a great deal. What kind of suffering it was I never thought I would tell. And whether that suffering was worth something or nothing. I never even think about such things. Anyhow, I have suffered. I have really suffered! And here, now, before my desk, I find only myself. Gazing fixedly at my extended hand is all I can do. Outside, the evening, leaves rustle; the faroff feeling of a spring evening. So I will die peacefully; so I sit, I’m going to die.”

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Nakahara Chuuya, “Half My Life” The Poems of Nakahara Chuuya

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Camilla Macaulay 

“Murder is pollution. The murderer defiles everyone he comes into contact with. And the only way to purify blood is through blood.”

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“The rain, this evening, like long ago; singing a song still like long ago. Maundering, maundering, terribly stubborn; then I see Monsieur Ver, that hulk, going down the alleys between the warehouse. Between the warehouses his slicker gleams. And then the peat’s miserable comedy. Well, if only I go through this alley, if only I go through, there is a faint hope… Oh! This is really hope?”

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Nakahara Chuuya, “Late Evening Rain - Image after Verlaine -” from The Poems of Nakahara Chuuya

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Things that scream gifted kid burnout

Being on Tumblr, Wattpad. or AO3. especially AO3

Having several unused notebooks, that are empty simply out of fear of "ruining" them.

A caffeine addiction that started with you pulling all nighters that has progressed into you living off of monsters and never sleeping.

Having a praise or degradation kink, I'm sorry dear, I don't make the rules,

Saint Bernard by Lincoln If you wanna listen

Buying books and never reading them and or reading classics just to say you've read them.

Listening to Mitski , specifically Brand New city

All of Bo Burnhams Inside

Being the mom friend (you wanna give people the affection and attention you never received outside of your academic accomplishments.)

Your love language being acts of service

Having an academia playlist but also having a "lets burn the government playlist"

Hozier

Wanting to run away to the woods but also wanting to run away to a big city and cut off everyone from your past.

Having an obsession with office supplies/stationary

Notes app rants

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❝i think we ought to read only the kind of books that wound and stab us.❞ — franz kafka.

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feels like every few weeks I have to relearn how to exist, that I do need to sit in the sun and move my body and not drink too much coffee and dress in clothes that make me feel good and talk to my friends and journal and get off my phone sometimes and eat vegetables and drink more tea and generally reclaim the space in my life for myself ya know

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“Here is something that neither the Chinese nor the Japanese have noted in the past: the principle of freedom and independence which exist as an inborn constitution. This word “freedom” when spoken carelessly would seem to imply willfulness or selfishness, but it does not by any means. The true meaning of freedom is to act according to one’s own mind without obstructing the freedom of others. Father and son, lord and vassal, man and wife, friends, each and all should be careful not to impose on the other, but each should extend his heart’s desires freely, and without enslaving others with his mind, accomplish his own independence. Then, with the inborn goodness of man prevailing, no one would stray to evil ways.”

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Fukuzawa Yukichi, “Words left in Nakatsu” from Fukuzawa Yukichi on Education