crrryy

[crrryy]

the innocent spring that was lost forever

spoilers for: jjk0, ch236, s2 shibuya arc (relating to stsg)

doomed from the start, geto was born with a cursed technique that literally required him to absorb, and fucking consume the waste from human society in order to get rid of them, to protect the non-sorcerers, geto has to wolf down rags of vomit n shit and fill himself with the trash of humanity so the humans can live.

satoru on the other hand was seen as a god, he was quite literally untouchable. he is all white hair and blue eyes — untainted. he was worshipped, even when he was just a child, as the future head of the gojo clan; no one has ever seen him as gojo satoru, he was the strongest since people found out he had six eyes and limitless, his childhood was stolen away because of his natural strength; naturally he also doesn’t have to hide his feelings with a customer service smile like suguru does.

‘no one is allowed to take youth away from young people. it’s unforgivable.’ (he was an abused that didn’t become the abuser)

and that’s why him and suguru clicked together so well, suguru was the only one who didn’t treat him like an anomaly, and suguru had the ability to keep up with him too.

‘we are the strongest.’

the star plasma vessel incident

now picture gojo and geto (not to mention the absolute satisfaction suguru would’ve felt when he was put on par with the gojo satoru) two teenagers sky-high on their horses, having never come across a single person that was strong enough to even challenge their power, then comes toji fushiguro, some guy with zero cursed energy and some metal weapons, then he absolutely decimated them and left them traumatised.

this isn’t to put down heavenly restriction, as we can see, toji and maki are both strong as shit. but just imagine the strongest duo being destroyed by this toji guy.

gojo on the brink of death figured out reverse curse technique, but before that, he dies first.

then we get to see what geto would have done if satoru did actually die, and this is one of those few universes where we don’t really need a reversed AU to figure out what he would’ve done instead.

immediately, without hesitation, geto brings out all the strongest curses he has absorbed and fights with all his might against the guy who killed satoru.

of course he doesn’t succeed.

he gets knocked out, and by the time he wakes up again, satoru has already finished the job (whose ego just shoots up even more. ‘throughout heaven and earth, i alone am the honoured one.’) and here comes the turning point.

when gojo was carrying riko amanai out the room of applauding people, he asked suguru ‘do you want to kill them all? the me right now probably wouldn’t feel a thing.’

and suguru answered ‘forget it. it’s pointless.’

at that moment, when they both faced death and almost crossed the border, satoru decided to use suguru as a moral compass, and whatever suguru says, goes.

a lot of people blame yuki for the turning of geto suguru, but i think it was that sentence that gojo said, it was probably the first ever mention of such an idea in geto’s head, even if he doesn’t realise it. and it’s ironic, that geto was gojo’s reason of staying righteous, but not the other way around. but it’s also what makes satosugu more tragic and even more beautiful.

‘geto was gojo’s first and last blue spring of youth.’

geto’s spiral

from then on, it all goes to shit. other than the ‘separation anxiety’ geto has from gojo, there’s the death of haibara, then the discovery of mimiko and nanako; it wasn’t yuki who put that maybe into his brain, she was just solidifying his already existent maybe, she’s just the messenger.

to a certain extent, i think toji is also part of the reason why geto calls non-sorcerers monkeys. he fostered a hate for them because the man who robbed them of their innocence was a person without cursed energy, it also explains why he’s particularly mean towards maki in jjk0

he loses weight. but it’s just heat stress. he’ll be fine. (sometimes, i wonder whether gojo ever blames himself for not pressing harder, that maybe if he did, geto would still be there with him.)

‘satoru has become the strongest.’

(hope u noticed the symbolism with the healthiness of the beta fish and that one looks at the fish and the other doesn’t)

kfc breakup

their youth officially ends in front of kfc. when suguru decides to leave jujutsu high and live his own way of life.

‘it’s just that in a world like this, i couldn’t laugh from the bottom of my heart.’

then in jjk s2, we see the truth. it was a sunny and breezy day, and from suguru’s perspective, all is well, gojo stands out because he’s gojo, and that’s it.

‘are you gojo satoru because you’re the strongest, or are you the strongest because you’re gojo satoru?’ (which was given an answer to in ch236, it’s the latter)

again, in jjk0, when gojo held up his hands, ready to blast suguru into pieces, his hand is sluggish, the movement is slow, and it shows that satoru is tired, he’s grown hopeless, he didn’t know what to do, he gave up.

but then in s2, we’re shown the reality again, the movement is like every other one, he’s angry, he’s frowning and he’s shouting, unlike the quiet in jjk0, he puts down his hand fast.

it’s the one thing satoru can’t do. even though letting him go is against the law, he’s supposed to arrest a curse user, but he can’t, how can he?

jjk 0

it’s been a decade before satoru sees geto again. but even then, gojo still recognises the scent of his curse energy, without hesitation.

and it’s sad, the first sentence gojo says to him is a threat, to take his hands off his students.

during the night parade of a hundred demons, gojo was able to save his students because he still knows geto like the back of his hand. he can see through his plans because he’s suguru.

so when finally, suguru is dying in the alleyway, it’s an intimate scene. even us, the audience isn’t allowed to intrude, we’re zooming away, and gojo’s lips move and only geto hears him: ‘at least curse me a little in the end’ (because geto long thought gojo lost his trust for him)

‘we’ll meet again, right?’

then it’s a flashback, to gojo’s first time letting suguru go, and the next time they see each other, gojo has killed suguru; even then, he’s still reinforcing his ideology: ‘i really hate those monkeys’ but even then, satoru still sees him as his best friend— ‘my best friend is the one who picked it up, my one and only.’ (despite geto not believing it.)

so gojo really meant it when he said ‘love is the most twisted curse of them all.’

shibuya arc

suddenly satoru sees geto again. they were the strongest duo, and they were so close that kenjaku wagered their entire plan’s determinant on how gojo would react when he saw geto again.

(this is why gojo vowed to never be emotional in a fight ever again, revealed in ch236, because geto’s burial from his emotional attachment is why the shibuya arc even exists)

satoro’s love isn’t one-sided either.

‘how can you let yourself get used like that, suguru?’

and just like that, geto’s body moved on its own because protecting satoru is like second nature, so much so that even his corpse alone can do it based on purely muscle memory.

ch236

during gojo’s visit to the limbo (hopefully not permanent) he said he would’ve been happy if geto was there to pat him on the back. after some more than 10 years, satoru never truly got over suguru. on his death bed, not even, he’s still thinking about suguru.

2nd gen satosugu— itafushi

that is an analysis for another day, but i think the sadistic gege might just end itadushi in the exact same way satosugu was ended. sukuna might just use megumi against yuuji in just the exact same way, and if he does, goodnight.

masterlist

[crrryy]

the innocent spring that was lost forever

spoilers for: jjk0, ch236, s2 shibuya arc (relating to stsg)

doomed from the start, geto was born with a cursed technique that literally required him to absorb, and fucking consume the waste from human society in order to get rid of them, to protect the non-sorcerers, geto has to wolf down rags of vomit n shit and fill himself with the trash of humanity so the humans can live.

satoru on the other hand was seen as a god, he was quite literally untouchable. he is all white hair and blue eyes — untainted. he was worshipped, even when he was just a child, as the future head of the gojo clan; no one has ever seen him as gojo satoru, he was the strongest since people found out he had six eyes and limitless, his childhood was stolen away because of his natural strength; naturally he also doesn’t have to hide his feelings with a customer service smile like suguru does.

‘no one is allowed to take youth away from young people. it’s unforgivable.’ (he was an abused that didn’t become the abuser)

and that’s why him and suguru clicked together so well, suguru was the only one who didn’t treat him like an anomaly, and suguru had the ability to keep up with him too.

‘we are the strongest.’

the star plasma vessel incident

now picture gojo and geto (not to mention the absolute satisfaction suguru would’ve felt when he was put on par with the gojo satoru) two teenagers sky-high on their horses, having never come across a single person that was strong enough to even challenge their power, then comes toji fushiguro, some guy with zero cursed energy and some metal weapons, then he absolutely decimated them and left them traumatised.

this isn’t to put down heavenly restriction, as we can see, toji and maki are both strong as shit. but just imagine the strongest duo being destroyed by this toji guy.

gojo on the brink of death figured out reverse curse technique, but before that, he dies first.

then we get to see what geto would have done if satoru did actually die, and this is one of those few universes where we don’t really need a reversed AU to figure out what he would’ve done instead.

immediately, without hesitation, geto brings out all the strongest curses he has absorbed and fights with all his might against the guy who killed satoru.

of course he doesn’t succeed.

he gets knocked out, and by the time he wakes up again, satoru has already finished the job (whose ego just shoots up even more. ‘throughout heaven and earth, i alone am the honoured one.’) and here comes the turning point.

when gojo was carrying riko amanai out the room of applauding people, he asked suguru ‘do you want to kill them all? the me right now probably wouldn’t feel a thing.’

and suguru answered ‘forget it. it’s pointless.’

at that moment, when they both faced death and almost crossed the border, satoru decided to use suguru as a moral compass, and whatever suguru says, goes.

a lot of people blame yuki for the turning of geto suguru, but i think it was that sentence that gojo said, it was probably the first ever mention of such an idea in geto’s head, even if he doesn’t realise it. and it’s ironic, that geto was gojo’s reason of staying righteous, but not the other way around. but it’s also what makes satosugu more tragic and even more beautiful.

‘geto was gojo’s first and last blue spring of youth.’

geto’s spiral

from then on, it all goes to shit. other than the ‘separation anxiety’ geto has from gojo, there’s the death of haibara, then the discovery of mimiko and nanako; it wasn’t yuki who put that maybe into his brain, she was just solidifying his already existent maybe, she’s just the messenger.

to a certain extent, i think toji is also part of the reason why geto calls non-sorcerers monkeys. he fostered a hate for them because the man who robbed them of their innocence was a person without cursed energy, it also explains why he’s particularly mean towards maki in jjk0

he loses weight. but it’s just heat stress. he’ll be fine. (sometimes, i wonder whether gojo ever blames himself for not pressing harder, that maybe if he did, geto would still be there with him.)

‘satoru has become the strongest.’

(hope u noticed the symbolism with the healthiness of the beta fish and that one looks at the fish and the other doesn’t)

kfc breakup

their youth officially ends in front of kfc. when suguru decides to leave jujutsu high and live his own way of life.

‘it’s just that in a world like this, i couldn’t laugh from the bottom of my heart.’

then in jjk s2, we see the truth. it was a sunny and breezy day, and from suguru’s perspective, all is well, gojo stands out because he’s gojo, and that’s it.

‘are you gojo satoru because you’re the strongest, or are you the strongest because you’re gojo satoru?’ (which was given an answer to in ch236, it’s the latter)

again, in jjk0, when gojo held up his hands, ready to blast suguru into pieces, his hand is sluggish, the movement is slow, and it shows that satoru is tired, he’s grown hopeless, he didn’t know what to do, he gave up.

but then in s2, we’re shown the reality again, the movement is like every other one, he’s angry, he’s frowning and he’s shouting, unlike the quiet in jjk0, he puts down his hand fast.

it’s the one thing satoru can’t do. even though letting him go is against the law, he’s supposed to arrest a curse user, but he can’t, how can he?

jjk 0

it’s been a decade before satoru sees geto again. but even then, gojo still recognises the scent of his curse energy, without hesitation.

and it’s sad, the first sentence gojo says to him is a threat, to take his hands off his students.

during the night parade of a hundred demons, gojo was able to save his students because he still knows geto like the back of his hand. he can see through his plans because he’s suguru.

so when finally, suguru is dying in the alleyway, it’s an intimate scene. even us, the audience isn’t allowed to intrude, we’re zooming away, and gojo’s lips move and only geto hears him: ‘at least curse me a little in the end’ (because geto long thought gojo lost his trust for him)

‘we’ll meet again, right?’

then it’s a flashback, to gojo’s first time letting suguru go, and the next time they see each other, gojo has killed suguru; even then, he’s still reinforcing his ideology: ‘i really hate those monkeys’ but even then, satoru still sees him as his best friend— ‘my best friend is the one who picked it up, my one and only.’ (despite geto not believing it.)

so gojo really meant it when he said ‘love is the most twisted curse of them all.’

shibuya arc

suddenly satoru sees geto again. they were the strongest duo, and they were so close that kenjaku wagered their entire plan’s determinant on how gojo would react when he saw geto again.

(this is why gojo vowed to never be emotional in a fight ever again, revealed in ch236, because geto’s burial from his emotional attachment is why the shibuya arc even exists)

satoro’s love isn’t one-sided either.

‘how can you let yourself get used like that, suguru?’

and just like that, geto’s body moved on its own because protecting satoru is like second nature, so much so that even his corpse alone can do it based on purely muscle memory.

ch236

during gojo’s visit to the limbo (hopefully not permanent) he said he would’ve been happy if geto was there to pat him on the back. after some more than 10 years, satoru never truly got over suguru. on his death bed, not even, he’s still thinking about suguru.

2nd gen satosugu— itafushi

that is an analysis for another day, but i think the sadistic gege might just end itadushi in the exact same way satosugu was ended. sukuna might just use megumi against yuuji in just the exact same way, and if he does, goodnight.

masterlist

[crrryy]

Why is Satoru so fixated on this idea of “never letting anyone be alone again”?

The answer at face value is obvious, Suguru was alone after they started taking solo missions, but let’s really talk about the gravity of that statement, and also the relevance that Shoko’s “I was there too, you weren’t alone” has with this concept.

I’ll be discussing the manga so spoilers if you aren’t caught up:

This analysis cooks I tell you

In Jujukai 0, Satoru sees that Yuuta tried killing himself with a knife to prevent hurting other people. He wants to confine himself completely and be alone, exactly like what Suguru had to go through a decade earlier. Satoru recognizes this and forces Yuuta to join the first years so that he won’t be alone and face the same descent into madness that Suguru did. He feels that he failed Suguru, and this is shown time and time again throughout the story, such as here:

Here, Satoru had a discussion with Shoko, who is remembering that conversation. He said that he’ll raise the next crop of sorcerers to be allies so no one will be alone (his prime motivation for everything), and then Shoko responds effectively, “I’d never fall in love with either of you, but even still, I was still there, you weren’t alone”

But she isn’t recognizing the full meaning behind Satoru’s words. Because what happened after Satoru became the strongest? This became his belief:

He advanced at such a quick rate that he left Suguru in the dust. And that caused both of them to be alone. He was alone in being the strongest, and Suguru was alone in being unable to reach that same level, alone to deal with curses on solo missions, and alone in his descent of madness. It drove them apart, and got in between their bond.

I think Shoko recognizes that much. But I thought it was weird when she suddenly said “I’d never fall in love with either of you” because it was like…well, yeah, but why say that? Bringing up love seemed kind of random and out of place.

And then I realized it’s because she recognizes that Satoru and Suguru were in love with each other. Being in love with someone means that you feel a certain level of depth unmatched with anyone else. You feel like the two of you are at the top of the world, or in your very own world, apart from the rest, completely untouchable. Time and time again we see this shown throughout Satoru and Suguru’s interactions.

That is what Shoko means when she says “I’d never fall in love with either of you”. She’s saying “I recognize that I never felt the kind of love you two had for each other, but you were still never alone.”

And I get that. But because she doesn’t comprehend the bond they had (and really, she couldn’t, because the only ones who can truly feel it are the two of them), Satoru and Suguru really were alone once they split up. Maybe not physically, but emotionally, they were all alone.

And Satoru left Suguru first. Not physically, but emotionally. Because of the stark difference in their abilities. And that is what lead Suguru down his dark path, because he felt alone, and Satoru wasn’t there to chase away his contempt for non-sorcerers like he used to.

When Satoru says he wants to raise strong allies so no one is alone, he’s saying that he wants no one to be the strongest, he wants everyone to be at the same level, so that there’s no barriers, there’s no blind reliance on power causing someone to take what they have in front of them for granted like he did to Suguru.

That’s why this hits harder given that context:

“Trust, huh? To think you still had some of that for me.”

Suguru spent these last 10 years thinking that Satoru didn’t trust him, didn’t need to, because of the difference in their abilities. Why trust someone else when you need only rely on your own powers? Or, in the animated version, Suguru says,

“You want to talk about trust? I didn’t think I still had any of that left, with the shit I went through.”

Satoru left him alone when he “alone became the honored one,” breaking Suguru’s trust. From that point, he didn’t pay real attention to Suguru. When he asked Suguru “have you lost weight? Are you okay?” And accepted Suguru’s half-baked answer, that showed Suguru that Satoru didn’t really care. Or at least, wasn’t paying enough attention to know something was seriously wrong. Broken trust. Satoru had abandoned him and their bond.

Too late, Satoru recognizes this. And he makes his vow to raise the next generation to be strong allies so that no one gets left behind like Suguru or isolated and “special” like himself. You can even see it when he decides to put Itadori in the room right next to Megumi. He never wants it to happen again.

[crrryy]

Everyone responding to this poll chooses between a blue pill or red pill. - if > 50% of ppl choose blue pill, everyone lives - if not, red pills live and blue pills die Which do you choose?

[crrryy]

i'm curious to know the ratio of writers to readers on ao3 so here's a poll. when i say writer, i mean people who have published works on ao3, doesn't matter if it's once, or if it was ages ago, or if it's a regular occurrence. when i say reader, i mean people who have never published a work on ao3. the reader vote still counts if you don't have an account on ao3. if you're a writer who is also an active reader, please still click on the "writer" option!

please do boost this so it reaches a larger sample space!

[crrryy]

"He had a rough life growing up, so I understood why he acted the way he did. But I learned later that just because I understood it didn’t mean it was okay. He doesn’t have a great awareness for other people or his own actions."

-An Impossible Door

By:Lilmochimoch

[crrryy]

Klein: I need a human skull and I can't have you ask any questions why.

Azik: Only if you also don't ask why.

Azik: (pulls out 7 pristine human skulls) Take your pick.

Klein: ...

Azik: ...

Klein: This one is fine.

[crrryy]

I think what I love most about current day tumblr and it’s obsession with things like Dracula daily and Goncharov is that it’s a reminder that the internet and social media can be fun. It’s not all algorithms and selling things to you based on data the company got from tracking all your movements. Sometimes it’s about coming together to have fun over something completely superfluous and stupid but ultimately meaningful because we gave it meaning.

[crrryy]

i'm so confused rn, can you explain the goncharov thing?? i get off tumblr for five minutes

(This post will be kept pinned & periodically updated until 28 Nov)

Lmaoooo

Nah I getchu. So this post has been circulating for like a year:

Link to post.

But yesterday, it had inspired someone to do this:

Link to post.

Next thing I knew there were fake Letterboxed reviews.

Goncharov moodboards. Really good ones.

Link to post.

Meta analysis. So many fake meta essays. Disturbingly good ones. And of course the memes. (Edit: HAVE I SAID THIS SHIT IS DISTURBING)

As you can see, the myth just started to grow, characters and ships and tropes being added one after the other, almost bizzarely without contradiction, until there was enough of shape to the whole thing for people to start posting fanfic about it on AO3. "No beta we die like ice-pick Joe" is already a tag.

Link to post.

It was hilarious in the beginning, but the way it's developed within less than a day, kind of like it's being willed into existence, is freaking me out a bit. We're toying with powers beyond our comprehension. 😂😂😂

Link to post.

Of course, there could be an ulterior motive as well.

Link to post (tags mine).

Edit: guys, please tag these posts "unreality" so people with disassociation issues can filter them out (not this one, this is an explainer). <3

----------------------------------------------

Edit 2: Aparently the boots in the original post are actually referring to a movie called Gomorrah that came out in 2008, directed by Mateo Garrone, based on the Scampia Feud. And other people had also been making posts about the fake movie for a while before the poster took off.

found by @thepotch

Edit 3: Explainer: why did those boots have this movie on them anyway?

Edit 4: Alt text added to all images courtesy of @valentineish ❤️

Edit 5: Turns out tumblr has done this kind of thing before. Nine years in this hell place and I had to have "Squiddles" and penis smp explained in the replies.

Edit 6: This post collects the Lore so far.

Edit 7: Lynda Carter (real one)/ earns more/ Tumblr cred.

Edit 8: Holy shit y'all we have the theme music. With sheet music. And it's on Spotify!

Edit 9: THERE IS A TRAILER WITH THE THEME MUSIC

----------------------------------------------

I made this post 18 hours after the movie poster went up. Closed edits 27 hours after first posting. So all of the above happened within 45 hours of the movie poster going up.

Edit 10: Google document live-compiling all the lore so far (Day 3)

Edit 11: Masterpost of Goncharov soundtracks (Day 3)

Edit 12: Entertainment news articles covering the Gonch-posting (real) (Contd from yday)

Edit 13: The music from the masterpost all compiled into a 31-minute original score with video edits on YouTube (edit: unfortunately taken down)

Edit 14: Staff's Goncharov art showcase for Tumblr Tuesday

As of closing on Day 3 there are 371 works in the AO3 tag.

-----

Updating with Day 3 shenanigans I missed yesterday:

Edit 15: Goncharov TV Tropes page

Edit 16: Ethics of Gonchposting

Important PSA 1 (how to reduce harm to Tumblr's neurodivergents)

Important PSA 2 (reality affirmation, anti-bullying)

Important PSA 3 (why you should stop trying to vandalise legit information sites)

Edit 17: Character lore from beezlebub whose poster they originated from

Edit 18: What we know about/ Director Matteo JWHJ0715 (#unreality)

Edit 19: Link to post with screenshotted and described NYT article (scroll down) and this golden exerpt from BuzzFeed: 💀

(alt text included)

End of Day 4 there are now 485 works in the Goncharov tag on AO3

[crrryy]

The Important Distinction Between Words

The Important Distinction Between Words

by BooknerdMiss

A few weeks after the Not-pocalypse, Aziraphale and Crowley are out enjoying a meal together. When a well-written menu description leads to a disappointing dessert order, Crowley promises to remedy the situation.

Inspired by a true story.

Words: 1338, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Fandoms: Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett, Good Omens (TV)

Rating: General Audiences

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: M/M

Characters: Aziraphale (Good Omens), Crowley (Good Omens)

Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)

Additional Tags: Pre-Relationship, Flirting, Dessert & Sweets, Drinking, Aziraphale is “just enough of a bastard to be worth knowing” (Good Omens), Crowley’s Love Language is Acts of Service (Good Omens), Sweet, Short, “Footnotes”

From https://ift.tt/H9Zg6CM https://archiveofourown.org/works/42441633

[crrryy]

US Helplines:

Depression Hotline: [phone]

Suicide Hotline: [phone]

LifeLine: 1-800-273-8255

Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386

Sexuality Support: 1-800-246-7743

Eating Disorders Hotline: [phone]

Rape and Sexual Assault: 1-800-656-4673

Grief Support: 1-650-321-5272

Runaway: 1-800-843-5200, 1-800-843-5678, 1-800-621-4000

Exhale: After Abortion Hotline/Pro-Voice: 1-866-4394253

Child Abuse: 1-800-422-4453

UK Helplines:

Samaritans (for any problem): 08457909090 e-mail [email protected]

Childline (for anyone under 18 with any problem): 08001111

Mind infoline (mental health information): 0300 123 3393 e-mail: [email protected]

Mind legal advice (for people who need mental-health related legal advice): 0300 466 6463 [email protected]

b-eat eating disorder support: 0845 634 14 14 (only open Mon-Fri 10.30am-8.30pm and Saturday 1pm-4.30pm) e-mail: [email protected]

b-eat youthline (for under 25’s with eating disorders): 08456347650 (open Mon-Fri 4.30pm - 8.30pm, Saturday 1pm-4.30pm)

Cruse Bereavement Care: 08444779400 e-mail: [email protected]

Frank (information and advice on drugs): 0800776600

Drinkline: 0800 9178282

Rape Crisis England & Wales: 0808 802 9999 1(open 2 - 2.30pm 7 - 9.30pm) e-mail [email protected]

Rape Crisis Scotland: 08088 01 03 02 every day, 6pm to midnight

India Self Harm Hotline: [phone]

India Suicide Helpline: 022-27546669

Kids Help Phone (Canada): 1-800-668-6868

FREE 24/7 suicide hotlines:

Argentina: 54-0223-493-0430

Australia: 13-11-14

Austria: 01-713-3374

Barbados: 429-9999

Belgium: 106

Botswana: 391-1270

Brazil: 21-233-9191

China: 852-2382-0000

(Hong Kong: 2389-2222)

Costa Rica: 606-253-5439

Croatia: 01-4833-888

Cyprus: 357-77-77-72-67

Czech Republic: 222-580-697, 476-701-908

Denmark: 70-201-201

Egypt: 762-1602

Estonia: 6-558-088

Finland: 040-5032199

France: 01-45-39-4000

Germany: 0800-181-0721

Greece: 1018

Guatemala: 502-234-1239

Holland: 0900-0767

Honduras: 504-237-3623

Hungary: 06-80-820-111

Iceland: 44-0-8457-90-90-90

Israel: 09-8892333

Italy: 06-705-4444

Japan: 3-5286-9090

Latvia: 6722-2922, 2772-2292

Malaysia: 03-756-8144

(Singapore: 1-800-221-4444)

Mexico: 525-510-2550

Netherlands: 0900-0767

New Zealand: 4-473-9739

New Guinea: 675-326-0011

Nicaragua: 505-268-6171

Norway: 47-815-33-300

Philippines: 02-896-9191

Poland: 52-70-000

Portugal: 239-72-10-10

Russia: 8-20-222-82-10

Spain: 91-459-00-50

South Africa: 0861-322-322

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[crrryy]

Khun Aguero Agnis

The Facade Master : because Khun is actually weak

So welcome to this very uncalled for essay about yours truly, Khun <3

⚠️ CONTAINS SPOILERS FOR THE WEBTOON ⚠️

1. Khun uses a strong cold front so people can't see how traumatised and weak he is

Yes! Khun is someone who hurts... A LOT

The best evidence Khun is GREAT at faking his well being is because you only notice the extent of his trauma later on on the webtoon.

Khun's interactions with Kiseia, his father (the old version of Eduan I mean) and the flashbacks of Maria are the rare moments we CAN SEE who Khun really is. I mean, there are several other moments Khun let's his guard JUST A BIT DOWN but most of those are related to Bam because you guys know... Khun is soft from Bam and stuff 😏🤣

BUT MOVING ON

1. Kiseia / the trauma of an empatic kind hidden soul - I think this one is the main topic, cuz just the fact that she is Khun's main antagonist, means he is VERY afraid of her. And why is that? Because deep down, Khun was traumatized by the fact that his biological sister killed herself when he decided to help Maria

Khun says his sister was very cold and he didn't interact with her much, but Khun is not the heartless dude he claims and shows to be (well, expect for his enemies and RACHEL)

Khun is actually an individual capable of strong empatic feelings. He analizes people and tries to judge their character based on their actions and non verbal language. When Khun formed a team to climb the tower and bitch Rachel stabed Edian's legs until he couldn't almost walk, Khun was in pure sock, and very very conserned for Edian's well being. He stayed up all night by his side to make sure he was all right.

When it comes to Bam, Khun is even more peculiar in his empaty... is almost a possessive kind of empaty. Khun doesn't want Bam to go somewhere he himself can't reach. That's why he hates when people (in the name hunt station) called him " God". But at the same time, Khun wants to shield Bam from those high expectations that might crush him. He doesn't want Bam to have that burn because... he knows the burden of high expectations

2. Maria / the deathly choise and first step to freedom- Maria is a very important person in Khun's life. By the little flashbacks we have, we can see that Maria has sort of an "outcast" in the Khun family because she was unusually kind. When Maria asked Khun if he would help her become a princess of Jahad, Khun had nothing to gain from it.

Khun usually manipulates people and does what he has to do to get that benefits him the most. But when it came to Maria... he choose the worst option. It wasn't a rational option, because Khun is VERY EMOTIONAL. He is bindled to his emotional self because he considers himself a very rational human being, which makes him unable to see how emotional heighted his choises are.

In truth, Khun was captivated by Maria. He was curious because she was different. He decided to help her because she showed him another option, another way... an escape route to a word Khun didn't even know it existed... the world of kidness, a world where life was valued, people didn't kill each other and he could be the child he was without having to be concern about power games inside his family.

And Khun chose Maria in the first place because he HATED those power games. Because he, in truth, kind and never wanted to take part on those dirty, manipulative games. Maria destroyed Khun's life. The price to pay was the heavy trauma and guilt of having his sister kill herself, but Khun got his FREEDOM

Maria presents Khun with the ideia of " struggling is beautiful" and Khun, for the first time, knows that life has value and his family ways are not all the world has to offer

3. Khun Eduan / all not to be and all he can be - Eduan represents Khun's incompetence in leaving the past behind. Even tho he was abandoned by his family, and wants to follow a different path from the Khun family's values and atitudes, Khun is unable to seperate himself from his origins.

But Khun HAS the need to make himself different from other Khuns, shown by how he felt the need to make a spear of his own, so his was not a copy of his father. He, by any means, doesn't want to be associated with Eduan, because Eduan represents all he hates in his family, in his previous life.

But Khun still uses his family name with "pride". More like... a guilt coat I would say. Sometimes he claims how despicable, sneaky, sly and mischievous he can be... but isn't that just a way to TRASH himself? To speak badly of himself?

Isn't that coat just a way to put the weight of others people's shoulders on his? In truth, Khun views himself as someone "dirty" he has blood on his hands despite everything. So he gives himself the dirty jobs he thinks he is worth of doing.

That's the only way he knows how to act. The only way he knows how to survive. If Khun dropped that facade of the sly man that trusts no one... what would be left of him? Someone vulnerable, someone afraid to be abandoned once again, by Bam, just as Maria did. Someone unable to free himself from his family because other than that, he doesn't know who he is, he can't see himself.

And he struggles to find who he is, because he was never able to be anything else than a KHUN . He is still searching for that sensible persona he truly is, but in the harsh reality of the Tower, Khun's sly facade is the best mask to have

4. Bam / protective projection and affection - " I keep my most precious jewel hidden so I never get to use it on me"

SO we had to finish with the best part, right?

Bam is alm Khun wasn't able to be. Innocent, care free, unbounded by anything in the tower. Khun feels the intense need to make sure Baam is not a victim of the same cruelty and raw violence and malice he was victim of. That's why Khun takes care of the dirty jobs himself... because he wants to keep Bam's hands clean, even if it means he was to stain his own hands.

The quote by the start of this topic resumes pretty much Khun's relation with Bam: Khun wants to protect Bam so badly, and shild him from all warm even if he knows that's 100% IMPOSSIBLE but he also wants to live openly with Bam by his side, without hidding. He wants to fully enjoy the pure hapiness of having a real friend by his side.

Khun is VERY VERY afraid of being abandoned. He "choose to be", but that did impact him for the rest of his life. When he judjes someone as someone who is a GOOD PERSON he tends to hold on to them even if his life depends on it. Because in truth, Khun is desperate for that human connection and bonds that Maria showed could exist if he reached for something different.

Bam is a good person in Khun's eyes. In Khun's eyes he must not suffer. But if Bam lives openly, he will SUFFER, because he will show the Tower his true power, the will become the " GOD" and Khun wouldn't be able to reach him any longer. " Isn't better being human? " shows how much Khun wants Bam to free himself from high expectations, just as much Khun needs to still free himself to the weight of his name.

In the end, Khun is fighting a battle he knows he can't win. He is acting on emotion alone when he follows Bam, when he makes sure his jewel is save on his pocket. He knows he was to let it go eventually, but Khun will do everything NOT TO LET GO. Because Khun sees in Bam everything he wishes for, everything he wants in the relationships with others.

Bam is the personification of Khun's resolve to chose the hard, yet better way to live life.

There is nothing sly and evil in his persona. He is just a boy who wasn't able to grow his own personality, self - worth and self - value because of the rudness of the world. Khun doesn't want to be like his family, but not being like them is not enough... because that's a emtpy pit of dispare.

Khun has to be his own person, find who he is.

But until he realizes and admits that those emotions live inside him, until he is able to face himself and his traumas and weakness... Khun will never be able to be more than just " someone different from his family"

Who knows who Khun might turn out to be when he is truly free from himself, when he shows his true colors. I am sure he is far from dirty and rude. He is beautiful, hurt and kind 💙

Ps: I find it interesting how Khun and Killua Zoldyck (from Hunter x Hunter) are so so similar in the way they think and their relationship to their significant other (Gon in Killua's case)

But Killua has able to free himself from his family and find himself at the end. But I think Khun's situation is more complicated than Killua's since there are more people and power games involved. And Khun is even more blind to his emotional side than Killua is...

Let's hope for the best we got your back Khun 😤💙

[crrryy]

DO NOT SUPPORT SALVATION ARMY 

[crrryy]

OMG your bkdk fic are so angst and hot katsuki characterization is top notch I read at Ao3 today,can't wait for the next one.....

Sorry for my english, not my first language😘😘

THIS IS SO SWEET AND KIND!! NO WORRIES UR ENGLISH IS PERF N THANK U FOR READING!!

[crrryy]

reblog this if your blog is a safe space on april fools and won’t have any jumpers, screamers, or anything scary or anxiety inducing

[crrryy]

i kept seeing reigen edits with meme-y songs so i tried my hand at it 

[crrryy]

Soooo....Saitama had already begun to put 2&2 together about who actually 'took care' of the cadres before with King's 'Ultimate Move,' saw Garou tanking hits vs more monsters to step in and help defeat Evil Ocean Water with a Serious Punch, and then saw much of the direct evidence himself when Garou made a huge scene chopping the centipede...

Enough for Saitama to take initiative with enough personal interest in him to confront an idle Garou himself with the million dollar identity QUESTION:

Whether Saitama's suddenly arrived to sate his own curiosity is one thing (surprisingly leaving the other heroes to deal with the wave's aftermath on their own, might I add.) For example, to ask about Garou's mystery identity/'costume' and his unknown apparent strength, or perhaps Saitama just wants more general information to get to the bottom of what's going on. (Hopefully Saitama doesn't blame Garou for the whole Monster Association mess here however, as that would be....a little unfair.) But so far, Saitama has seen no other incriminating evidence towards Garou being bad here yet (unless he remembers the 'Hero Hunter' stuff and the dine & dash encounter Garou looks different enough that even wc Saitama didn't recognize him)...that heck, Saitama could just be frank and forthright praising Garou's strength/heroics for helping to take out the monsters. :P (Which would be interesting to see how Garou reacts to such unexpected honesty, heh.)

As long as Saitama's question isn't ignored, brushed off, or interrupted by something else happening, like the other heroes or Psykos showing up for example, then...depending on who/what actually instigates the strength-gauging friendly spar fight (if it's starting now or later after a good introductory talk) I hope to see certain callbacks come up in their confrontation.

1. For Saitama to discern, just like Bang did in Garou's dojo flashback, the inherent 'softness' and hesitancy in Garou's fists to commit to the monster act.

Because while Garou may have destroyed the baddest monsters in spectacular (violent) fashion, he still keeps a non-lethal level of restraint when he faces hero (human) opponents. He never crosses the line of actually killing people (even in his feral 'sleep,' he doesn't want to) like he does monsters, so this distinction in his fighting intent/hesitancy, depending on who he targets, becomes an examination of his convictions & seriousness when it comes to his choice to hurt (vs his truer feelings/instincts to save) people as a 'monster,' that I hope Saitama still notices this nature about his behavior as they exchange fists and calls him out for being particularly un-monster-like 'sweet/soft' towards him.

2. While Saitama figuring out what's up with Garou is a main point of interest, on Saitama's side of character importance, I also hope his heroism is called into question and critiqued by Garou as well, as a reexamination of THIS moment:

Primarily for the "you're strong, but so what?" dilemma most familiar and personal to Saitama, as Garou (similar to King here) questions his duty/ideals and the reason why Saitama is even a hero in the first place. Because Saitama may be the strongest insurmountable 'final boss' wall towards Garou, but as the greatest hero??? (Has Saitama even found the answer or thought about it any further beyond seeing heroism as just a hobby?) When after the tournament arc - originally he was interested in martial arts because of hearing about Garou!! how fatefully ironic now - Saitama felt the stagnation like he gained nothing special from the experience and thought he was losing sight of why he originally became a hero. So King's question, weighing Saitama's heroic ideals of helping others vs his self-interest/satisfaction (seeking to sate his boredom/loneliness while 'too strong'), is just as relevant now and aligns with what I hope Garou's confrontation makes Saitama think about and reconsider from another perspective again.

Because, to put things in blunt perspective, when manga Garou hasn't really done anything wrong here yet, if Saitama hypothetically instigates the fight for self-serving reasons (which Garou would notice as not very heroic) for example - fighting to satisfy his own level of boredom/curiosity with someone 'strong,' unjustly blaming Garou for the 'noise' and destroying Saitama's house that wasn't Garou's fault, or the escalating monster disaster he didn't cause Garou actually helped destroy the worst monster threats!, taunting Garou to fight 'better' by insulting him & calling him 'chicken', or if the fight is framed with Saitama as the aggressor - aka the schoolyard 'bully' beating on Garou for the 'fun' of a good fight (which IS a panel present in the webcomic!) then...any of that portrayed in the manga's context would actually look poorly on Saitama's character. :O (!!!!) If Saitama were to behave just like his webcomic counterpart would towards manga Garou right now, it would honestly look quite unpleasant;;; as someone who likes both characters - because it's never fun to see one uplifted or degraded/humiliated at the expense of another. Which goes both ways - their characters can be challenged as they reexamine their strongest values/ideals, but I'd rather not see either character 'look bad' to achieve the arc's goal either.

So, provided the manga does its own thing that's consistent & respectable to both characters, as much as their fight originally leaned towards Garou's cathartic self-discovery and realizations before, I can only hope it brings something somewhat equally significant and enlightening towards Saitama's character as well. (As a possible continuation of what Saitama thought about and felt he didn't gain anything from last time following the manga's tournament arc.) A balance like that from ONE, appropriate to the manga's new context concerning and justifying why they'd fight, would be ideal to me.