Some relax with Jasmína. Nice walk, nice weather. Love nature. Having pretty bad episode, but my family is supporting me. Today is therapy day. Maybe I will color or draw something.
Stop-motion animation based on my friend’s sister and her gingerbread decoration in process 😊 I’m so proud of myself. When I focus on something very interesting to me, all of my anxiety suddenly disappears for a while. I wonder what the end result will look like 💛
There’s lockdown in our country. I’m glad I can stay at home and don’t go between people. My family doesn’t understand it. But online lectures are slowly killing me. Tons of essays, homework and videoconferences. Hope I learn something. Trying to do all these things.
But one positive thing: Skype talks with my friends. Didn’t talk with them for sooo long and now we’re “Skyping” almost every night! Feeling so much support 💛
Yesterday was quite a good day. Did some work, some meetings, plan my week... but I almost finished my model of tank!!! So proud of me!!! I’ll post the final version when I finish coloring it 😊
So angry and sad right now. Want to be alone. Just another bad day. Trying not to do stupid things. My family doesn’t get it. Or they don’t want to understand. Don’t want to talk to them anymore. Need someone who’ll understand me, listen to me, won’t judge me. For me it’s hard to survive with myself, dealing with others is now beyond my power.
Hope in few hours this feeling will be gone and I will be able to talk with them without argue.
Some coloring from Art therapy. Today feeling surprisingly good! Some headache, back pain and sore throat going on, but feeling good. Trying to rest and not feel guilty about doing nothing. And I quite enjoy it 😊
Last night I woke up about 4 AM with fever. Out of nowhere. Now fever under control, but have sore throat and back pain. Don’t know what could it be.
But huge success! I managed to hand in my essay about Locke and Rousseau, which was so hard to write. But done it! Now I can rest and get myself together.
Today another Lost ocean. Still coloring. Making me feel better.
Not a good day, but trying to celebrate every little success. Managed to get up, get dressed, eat something, color, go out for a while. Feeling little bit better after recalling all these things. Trying not to think about my failures.
One huge success. I was at the hairdresser’s. They were so nice and caring, it wasn’t so bad meeting people than my anxiety whispered to me all day. After I got home, I looked in the mirror and saw my new haircut, I liked myself so much like I haven’t in a long time. Trying to remember this moment. 💛
Today coloring My fantastic journey. Make some progress with my therapist. Otherwise really bad day. My depression is back. Hard to even get up. Force myself to color, in the end makes me feel a little bit better. Don’t want to meet anyone tomorrow, but I have some important appointments. Mum thinks I’m just lazy, she’s mad ať me. Have no energy to explain. Hoping for better days coming.