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daddyslilpumpin · 6 years
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daddyslilpumpin · 6 years
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i stare into the void and the void stares back at me
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daddyslilpumpin · 6 years
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am i dead or am i alive? i am not quite sure
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daddyslilpumpin · 6 years
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i apologise for my disconnection but i feel homesick and homesick as in idk if i will ever feel ok here on earth
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daddyslilpumpin · 6 years
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WHY AM I LIKE THIS
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daddyslilpumpin · 6 years
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yes im difficult and unproductive and annoying, but you wanted me to stay alive so here you go.ㅤ
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daddyslilpumpin · 6 years
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i need the world to slow down, i can’t fucking breathe
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daddyslilpumpin · 6 years
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don’t give up on me when my mood swings become too much and i can’t find the energy to hangout, it’s my disorder but i swear i’m trying
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daddyslilpumpin · 6 years
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:(
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daddyslilpumpin · 6 years
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daddyslilpumpin · 6 years
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daddyslilpumpin · 6 years
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We went on an adventure!
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daddyslilpumpin · 6 years
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Body’s response
You know what sucks most about sexual abuse... it’s not the ever lasting pain. Memories. Nightmares. It’s not being afraid of every guy you ever talk to, with the thought inside that he could hurt you if he really wanted to. No. It’s not the panic attacks.. the air you can’t seem to get into your lungs when u think of it. It’s when you finally meet a guy who wouldn’t ever hurt you. Loves you. Cares for you. But the hugs u need the most, sometimes remind you of that night long ago. And his hands on ur body make u wanna puke. But it’s not you. You love him. You trust him. It’s your body tho remembers what you tried so hard to ignore. The soft sweet brush of his hand is knives jabbing at your skin. You don’t understand why, your heart starts racing and you pull away from someone you’ve wanted your whole life... the scares that monster left on my soul. Make it harder for my love and I hate it. I hate it. I hate. It. I hate me. My body’s response to to mark you left. Leaves me paralyzed in fear. Makes me think I’m in danger. Makes me hate wanting to trust. But he loves me. I know that. I’m loved and safe and with time the kisses will hurt less and the pain will fade and he will fill my broken body with the love it forgot it had. And I won’t flinch anymore when he hugs me. Bc you where a monster. Who scarred my body. And soul. But now I’m with a man who will hold me every time I’m gonna fall. I never thought anyone could love something... used u could say. I felt broken and destroyed. I still feel destroyed and broken. Damaged. Just meat. But god this man loves me. I’m not damaged goods to him.. I’m his baby and he wouldn’t let anyone hurt me ever. Never. So while my body wants to scream and my heart sings. And I feel useless. And like you ruined me. I’ll hold him tighter when I wanna pull away. And it’ll be okay. Daddy’s there now. It’s gonna be okay. And time will heal what was broken. Shit. He’s already healed a lot of what’s broken.
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daddyslilpumpin · 6 years
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I’m so afraid
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daddyslilpumpin · 6 years
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sleepy sleepy baby🌙💞
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daddyslilpumpin · 6 years
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daddyslilpumpin · 6 years
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Have.. I become too much..? Am I too much..
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