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daisyssousa · 9 days
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not quite tuesday tidbit teases
it's probably tuesday somewhere and this just popped in my head and I wanted to share. what do you think? do we want more?
tagging if any of you want to share something 😘 @hippolotamus @eddiebabygirldiaz @messyhairdiaz @rainbow-nerdss @tizniz @spotsandsocks @daffi-990 @monsterrae1 @diazsdimples @watchyourbuck @wh0re-behavi0r @911onabc @chaosandwolves @rogerzsteven @epicbuddieficrecs @bekkachaos @fiona-fififi @wikiangela @exhuastedpigeon @the-likesofus @hoodie-buck @lover-of-mine @mikereads @jesuiscenseedormir @lemonzestywrites 💕
It’s just after midnight and Buck is going to bed. 
He’s been saying this for a couple hours but YouTube had too many AItA videos and Instagram had those gorgeously edited food recipe posts and he doesn’t even want to talk about the doomscrolling of TikTok. But he had a day off and it was supposed to be with Tommy so they could take the weekend and go somewhere fun and romantic, but then Tommy had to work. Buck could’ve gone in with the rest of A shift. But it was nice to have some alone time for himself so he took time for himself. 
His phone goes off with a call five seconds after he’s gotten into bed. It’s a number he doesn’t know. So he could ignore it. Or wait until they’ve left a message. But who would call at this hour for no reason? Or for scamming, telemarketing reasons? 
So Buck answers. 
“Buckley?” The man on the other end says. He sounds vaguely familiar but not enough that Buck came put a name or face with a voice. 
“Uh, yeah? Who is this?” 
“Mehta. Captain Mehta. Of the 133.”
“Oh, hey,” Buck says, automatically friendly and smiling. That makes sense now. “What’s up? Why the— why are you calling?” Why would he call in the middle of the night?
Why does anyone call in the middle of the night.
“Buckley,” he says and it sounds… it sounds… it sounds like…
They have him now. They’ll take care of him. Why don’t we get you cleaned up. He’s in good hands. They’ll rush him to surgery. You don’t have to worry. Let’s get you cleaned up. 
Lets get you cleaned up.
Buck can’t breathe. His whole body is cold. Frozen. 
He tries to get out of bed. He tries, but just slides to the floor beside it. He doesn’t make it any further.
“Buckley, there was a helicopter crash. Your team, our team we went to rescue the pilot. Your, uh, sorry, I don’t know what you call him, but your boyfriend? Life partner? He—”
Oh god. No. No, that’s not. That’s not happening. That is not what is happening right now. This can’t be a, Tommy is dead and I’m letting you know. It can’t be that. It’s not. They were going to—
They were supposed to have a romantic trip together. Wine tasting and some kind of museum Tommy thought Buck would love and maybe a visit to a hot springs up north and they were going to watch the sunset and the sunrise and—
And he can’t be dead. He can’t be.
“He’s alive,” Mehta says. “We’re at Cedars-Sinai. He’s alive, but. It doesn’t look good. He’s in the ICU now. He’s critical.”
Buck pushes himself up. Has to. He has to be there. 
He barely remembers to thank Mehta or even end the call before he switches off his phone and runs out the door. 
~
The drive is a blur. The drive is probably very illegal and he doesn’t know how he doesn’t crash, but he doesn’t have time to wait for an Uber or for anyone else. He runs as fast as possible to the ER lobby, and almost runs directly into Chimney. 
Not almost. Buck crashes into him and almost knocks them both to the floor but that almost actually is an almost because Chim somehow steadies them both. 
He’s pale. Shaken up. His eyes are red. He’s been crying. 
“Chim,” Buck says as broken as he feels. “Chim, where— where is he? What happened? How did this happen? Please tell me he’s okay. He can’t be dying, right? That can’t be happening?”
Chim opens his mouth and grips Buck’s arms tighter, still trying to steady him. “Buck, we— we don’t know yet. It was bad, but he’s tough. You know that. He could be fine.”
Buck lets out a broken whimper and backs away from him. “No. He is fine. He’s fine and this isn’t happening. I just— Chim, I just found him. I can’t lose him already.” 
There’s a flash of something on Chimney’s face but there’s movement around Buck, too. Other people. Bobby, he’s pretty sure. And Hen. They would be here. They would try to comfort him. But they don’t need to because it’s fine. Everything is fine and this isn’t happening. 
It can’t be happening. 
He can’t be dying.
There’s more movement and it’s all blurry, probably filtered through tears, but then everything stops. The world stops. 
Tommy is right in front of him. Whole, alive, real, a little rumpled and there are bloody scratches and bandages on his face and around his arm. But he’s here. He’s fine.
Buck slams into him, throws his arms around him, and sobs as he clutches him. 
“Baby,” Tommy says softly as he hugs Buck tightly, cradling him, comforting him, and Buck can breathe. He’s not frozen. Everything is okay. They were all wrong. Buck knew they were wrong. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry,” Tommy tells him and holds him tighter. 
Buck pulls back just to look at him. “No, it’s okay. You’re okay.” He takes a deep breath and smiles because Tommy is fine. He’s right here and everything is good. Buck touches Tommy’s battered face and caresses him gently. He’s bruised and also pale, and very soggy. It’s been stormy tonight. Another reason why Buck wasn’t all that eager to go out in it. “They told me—  fuck, they scared me. I thought— I thought I lost you. I was so scared. I don’t want to lose you. He told me—Mehta, Captain Mehta— he called and told me there was a helicopter crash and my boyfriend was in the ICU and he’s critical and it didn’t look good, and I can’t— god, I can’t. Tommy, I—”
Tommy’s face isn’t good. It’s pale. Bad. Not smiling. Not relieved. It falls and he can’t even hide the devastation on it. He looks like guilt and death, and his mouth moves but nothing comes out. “Evan,” he finally says, barely says. It’s too quiet, too broken. “Evan…”
No. No, Buck doesn’t like that. He doesn’t want to throw up right now. And he just might. His heart is rabbit speed lightning and his legs don’t exist anymore and there’s an awful blackhole of apocalyptic world-ending destruction swirling and growing in his stomach. 
Someone takes his arm. Someone needs his attention. He’s moved from Tommy’s arms because there is no safety or comfort anymore. There’s no relief. There’s no happily ever after, nothing will ever be okay. 
Buck knows why Mehta said what he said. He knows who isn’t here. He knows who would have come to him and immediately comforted him. 
He knows. 
He knows what this is now. It can’t be that. It can’t. 
Hen tells him. She holds his arm and says calmly even if it’s broken. Everything is broken. They’re all broken. “Buck. It’s Eddie.”
No. No, it isn’t. It isn’t that either. Buck really can’t take that. It was bad enough, unimaginable enough the other way. It can’t be this. 
He’s already done this. They did this before. More than once. Forty plus feet of cruel earth and a whirling burst of metal and blood all over him. 
Eddie’s blood was all over him. 
“The helicopter went down and got stuck on the cliffs. He went in so he could pull Tommy out, and we got Tommy out,” Hen tells him, every word a knife stabbing through both of them. All of them. 
“He saved me,” Tommy says, quiet and full of regret. “He saved me and went down with it. They thought it was stable enough. It wasn’t. They got him out after. But…”
Buck collapses to his knees on the floor and holds his head in his own hands as if he can somehow hold himself together when there’s no holding himself together. 
It’s Eddie.
It’s Eddie it’s Eddie it’s Eddie. 
Buck shatters like flimsy glass and sobs in all the pieces that are being ripped out of him. What about Chris? What about Abuela? What about Eddie’s parents and sisters and friends and everyone else who loves him?
What about Buck? They can’t be BuckandEddie without Eddie. 
“I need to see him,” Buck suddenly says to the closest person who will listen. “I need to be with him. Please. Please.”
There’s arguing that happens. Bobby yells at someone. Hen, Chim, and Tommy stay around him like a protective guard. Until someone finally agrees. He’s not in surgery, they can’t take him to surgery yet. He’s not stable enough. But he’s on a ventilator, life support. They warn him and Buck doesn’t care. He knows how bad these things can be. He’s lived through several. 
They give him five minutes. 
They’ll have to drag him out with an armed guard if they think Buck will agree to only that. But at least it’s something. 
It’s something. 
Eddie is mostly covered. Blankets, wires, tubes, IV lines, bandages. He’s paler than all of them. Slightly blue-purple, cyanotic. They tell him a few things but Buck can’t hear them. He just wants to be with Eddie. 
Buck sits beside him and rests a shaking hand over Eddie’s hand, under the blankets where it’s trying to be warm. Buck would give anything to keep him warm, and alive. 
Eddie needs to stay alive. He needs to. 
Buck rests his forehead on the side of the bed near their joined hands. He would say something if he had the capacity to form words and sentences. The only thing in his head right now is, don’t leave me, please don’t leave me.
And that’s probably all he can say. All that really matters. 
Don’t leave me, don’t leave me, please, don’t ever leave me.
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daisyssousa · 16 days
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♥ Enver laughing & smiling ♥
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daisyssousa · 17 days
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Enver Gjokaj as Joseph the Grey Alien (Joseph Rainier) | "Resident Alien" Episode 03x08 | "Homecoming" (part two)
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daisyssousa · 23 days
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IM NOT READYYYYYY
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daisyssousa · 23 days
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i hate fun
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daisyssousa · 23 days
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today’s been so much fun booping, super booping, evil booping and spam booping friends, mutuals, mutuals in law and total strangers, but the day's come to an end. just know that every time you booped me i smiled, and every time i booped someone i did so very affectionately (yes, even all the evil boops!). let's remember how much we all enjoyed today and try to keep this energy for the rest of the year because that is what truly makes this hellsite so special. interact with others if you can, participate in events and games if possible, support creators by reblogging their content, etc. trust me, it makes everything easier and everyone happier. <3
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daisyssousa · 23 days
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Okay so whenever I am trying to send super boops and evil boops it gives me an error 🥲 So returning all your super boops and evil boops here! 💕 😺
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daisyssousa · 23 days
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For Boop-Badges Collectors
Rough estimate: It's possible to reach 1000 boops in less than 2 hours (took me 1:30h), if you got some people to spam it to.
If you are a blog where people can spam boop's to, reblog this.
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daisyssousa · 23 days
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idk if Tumblr will keep the boops going after today, but through the power of discord emoji, you can boop your friends in a server. or idk, paste them in someone's askbox.
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daisyssousa · 23 days
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i need the 1000 boops badge... reblog if i can boop you 1000 times
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daisyssousa · 23 days
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you BOOP Miette?????????
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daisyssousa · 23 days
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if you're ok with an incessant amount of boops reblog this so I can get those other 2 badges <3
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daisyssousa · 23 days
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if we loose this feature tomorrow let me just say it was a pleasure booping with all of you.
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daisyssousa · 23 days
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tumblr just gave everyone a cardboard tube and said go wild
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daisyssousa · 23 days
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"how did you spend your April fools?"
Truth: "I got into a slap fight with 500 strangers"
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daisyssousa · 23 days
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daisyssousa · 23 days
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Happy boop day🥰
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