delunesnumberonefan

[delunesnumberonefan]

#amazing #oh i love this #favorite posts #beautiful art

[delunesnumberonefan]

hiiii can u threaten my life for me i think itd be hot

#saskia tag #i want that woman to hurt me

[delunesnumberonefan]

in 2015 I needed a job really bad for reasons not worth getting into. i was living in ohio for like 6 months & i just applied at every place within a 30 minute drive from me and i got a call from the local Game Stop mere minutes after submitting the online app, which was obviously a red flag but I wasn’t in the position to be picky.

so they tell me when to show up for orientation & I get there the day-of but the store is closed & locked. i text the manager & he says back “oh yeah. i manage two Game Stops and open them alternate days.”

apparently the Game Stop I originally applied to is open Mondays Wednesdays Fridays and the other one is open Sundays Tuesdays Thursdays Saturdays.

They’re 15 minutes apart. I don’t ask whether it would make sense to just have one store locally that is open daily, bc maybe the guy knows something I don’t.

So I get to the other Game Stop and walk in and it seems like there’s no one working there. There’s just a single woman in there wearing an ankle length leather trench coat. She didn’t greet me when I came in & she’s just browsing.

After ten minutes I ask her if she’s seen any employees and she’s like “oh I’m an employee.” She’s not wearing a name tag on the trench coat.

I tell her I’m here for training and she tells me the manager hasn’t come in yet. “he falls asleep playing xbox all the time but if he’s on live we can try pinging him to wake him up.”

I play Xbox and that absolutely doesn’t sound like a thing you can do in the way she’s describing it but once again maybe she knows something I don’t.

I ask if we have an Xbox that we can use to “ping” him and she says “yeah the one in the back we play on.”

She has an English accent by the way, a very specific & posh one which usually wouldn’t be relevant but we’ll get there.

So before she leads me to the Xbox-in-the-back she goes “oh damn. our internet has actually been down all morning, I forgot. We need to call the provider and have them come out and fix it. Can you do that?”

Can I call an unnamed internet provider and schedule them to come do service at a business where I don’t even technically work yet? Idk. She gives me their number and I call them and they put me on hold.

People are walking in and she’s not greeting them. She keeps browsing and people assume like I did that she’s another customer so they’re coming up to the counter where I’m on hold to ask me for help, and then I have to say I can’t help them and to ask the woman in the trenchcoat, and then she says “we can’t sell you anything. internet’s down.”

this goes on for 30 minutes and every time the store is empty she’s chatting at me and I’m on hold and then a man walks in the door and he says “sorry I fell asleep on live again haahaahaa” so this is the manager and the minute she starts speaking to him she no longer has an English accent which has me confused because it did not sound fake.

It was regionally specific and very natural.

the manager asks what I’m doing and I say I’m on hold with the internet provider and he gives me a thumbs up and walks to the back.

so I ask how long she’s lived in the U.S. and say I’m always interested in the way people can sometimes go in and out of accents and she says “oh I’m American. he asked me to stop doing the accent so I only do it when he’s not here.”

Suddenly I wonder what I’m doing here and I tell her I need to leave and I give no excuse but at this point I didn’t feel like I needed one? She said okay! See you later.

The manager didn’t contact me and that night I got offered some other retail job I jumped on.

Three months later the Game Stop manager texts me and asks if I can cover a shift in an hour and I say back “I don’t think I work there? I left an hour into my training. And we never spoke again.” And he texts back “hahahaha right on.”

And you may think wow, what a strange experience that all was but recently I have spoken to friends who did work at Game Stop and when I tell them this story they don’t even blink. Nothing I say surprises them. I was at the average Game Stop

#oh incredible #amazing #favorite posts

[delunesnumberonefan]

Jesse. Jesse meth isn't the only thing we're cooking. Because today's video was sponsored by Hello Fresh.

#drugs mention #amazing #favorite posts #super favorite posts

[delunesnumberonefan]

you disagreed w me in an intellectually honest way. we're friends now.

#literally jon #i cannot say this emphatically enough #literally jon. #friend posts

[delunesnumberonefan]

Sooo this happened on tiktok

And the comments are gold

(+Extra)

#i am fucking HOWLING #favorite posts #super favorite posts #not safe for tumblr #oh i am CRYING

[delunesnumberonefan]

youre weirdly obsessed with finding meaning

#literally me #me

[delunesnumberonefan]

if a character means enough to me i will truly never stop thinking about them. i just retire them into a little back room in my brain and periodically bring them out to stare at them under a little light

#me #for real tho

[delunesnumberonefan]

i deserve fangs and would not use them for evil reasons :3

#me #give me fangs. and then come closer.

[delunesnumberonefan]

#summer tag #food cw #damn i missed my opportunity

[delunesnumberonefan]

im just fucking with you my liege

#somehow #belialah tag

[delunesnumberonefan]

u know seeing regulars on my notifs makes me happy it's like i run a cafe and there's regular customers who stop by 😭

#yes!!! #for real tho #also sorry boop i live in your cafe i guess

[delunesnumberonefan]

Can’t a girl just do the worst that she can …

#saskia tag #haha yeah... #I sure hope she does

[delunesnumberonefan]

#blog thursday... #tag yourself

[delunesnumberonefan]

i know my ass is up too late because i’m losing my fucking mind over accidentally typing george of the gungle

#oh i love it #amazing #favorite posts #guns cw

[delunesnumberonefan]

I talk a lot about loving tall masc women, but honestly if you're a little lesbian that looks like Chilchuck I’m gonna swoop in like a hawk on a 5 pound chihuahua and vest spikes will not deter me

#I showed this to my fiance and was explaining chilchuck (despite never seeing the show myself) #I ended up showing her a picture of chilchuck bc she thought he was the dwarf #she looks. she nods. she says ''thats just you.'' #me: ;-; #her: ive already swooped in. ive got you. #amazing tbh im gonna marry her #summer tag

[delunesnumberonefan]

everyone hate my loquacious swag. its always "why did you make this sentence so long" and "why do you use so many commas and em dashes" and never "how did you come up with run on sentence" or "writing that run on sentence looked fun"

#me #real.