I need whatever followers that are still active to read this.
THC helped me get through some extremely dark times. It allowed me to feel comfort, when otherwise uncomfortable. It gave me a sense of security, when I wasn’t able to provide that sense on my own. It gave me hope when hopeless. It gave me a hobby when I was passionless.
I no longer feel passionate about cannabis like I once did. I’m dependent on THC physically due to its anti inflammatory properties that help me with my life long digestion issues. The truth is, I cannot consume THC without panicking anymore. Im slowly attempting to ween off, so I can attempt a completely sober lifestyle. I feel guilty/responsible for glorifying something that has the potential to lead someone into depression and anxiety. I have so much more to offer the world than what I’ve been giving. We are all so much more capable then we can possibly imagine. Today is ~day 10 of an ongoing nervous breakdown. I believe I had been masking my emotions for so long, that I became flooded with years of repression all at once. I have cried and wept more these last 10 days, then I have in the last 10 years.
Thankful to have family that supports me, and all of my endeavors. Thankful for their understanding, even though I’ve been defiant for longer than I can remember. I know this feeling isn’t forever, and I hope I can enjoy THC in moderation again one day.
Inbox always open if you’re struggling in any way, I may not be emotionally available right away but I’m more than willing to give my perspective on things if it’s requested. Life is a gift and we need to use it wisely.
I have unfortunately spent a lot of time in my life being angry, using THC and mushrooms as a mediator to process my emotions. Angry about what, you may ask? Anger for me has always been an accountability issue. Convincing myself my problems are due to errors within society or my surroundings. It’s way easier to blame anything other than yourself for the darker moments in your life. I miss people that are no longer around. I miss people that have grown in separate directions. I miss people that I cannot repair the relationship with, and that’s okay. I’m ready to realize my full potential without any more self inflicted speed bumps.
Money cannot buy happiness, but a little effort can potentially earn it.
Do you ever look into someone’s eyes, and the energy/information you receive tells you that their life could potentially be cut drastically short? Perhaps individuals who’s timelines will skew off a bit early, have the ability to get glimpses at mutual human experiences. RIP to a man who radiated positive energy whenever they entered the room. RIP to a man that I relate to heavily.
I could really use a nice psilocybin session, guided by someone who respects and understands the medicine equally. I have never had this opportunity in my life, despite having access to the medicine for over a decade.