diablajayno

[diablajayno]

I had a nightmare last night. I was eating something, but i can't remember what exactly. Then I looked in the mirror and saw my fat double chin. It was like a balloon full of water and my belly was hanging down. I touched my body and felt like jelly. But I wasn't surprised or shocked. I JUST ACCEPTED IT.

Luckily I woke up and remembered that I don't want to accept my obesity. I will not accept it. NEVER.

So here I go again. Drinking water to fill my stomach. Fasting, so the weight jumps off of my body. Working out, so my lazy ass burns calories.

I want my body back.

#weightloss #weightloss motivation #obesity #fasting

[diablajayno]

Why?

my jawline can cut paper

my belly doesn't feel like jelly

I don't have to search for xxl clothes

spending less money on food

my legs don't hurt

I'm not sweating from low activity

my collarbones are sharp like a knife

face doesn't look like a bag of rice

clear skin

small and light

freezing is cute

"you should eat more, sweety"

Chairs don't squeak when I sit down

"woah, you are so light!"

Cheekbones

no breath issues from taking stairs

Outfits look exactly like I want them to look on me

People threat me better

I'm not invisible anymore

My fingers don't look like sausages

no doublechin

No back pain from big boobs

Black, tight dresses

No body part is jiggling

I feel like an angel

That's why.

#weightloss #motivation #weightloss motivation #fasting

[diablajayno]

I'm not interested in food.

No thanks, I'm not hungry.

Sorry, I have no appetite.

I'm not interested in food.

No thanks, I'm not hungry.

Sorry, I have no appetite.

[diablajayno]

!!! ATTENTION PLEASE !!!

.

.

Sadly, i'm still fat.

.

.

!!! THANK YOU !!!

[diablajayno]

I don't go swimming, because of my overweight.

I don't go shopping , because of my overweight.

I don't go dancing, because of my overweight.

I don't meet new people, because of my overweight.

I don't feel comfortable, because of my overweight.

I don't want to live life, because of my overweight.

I. need. to. lose. weight.

[diablajayno]

There is one part in me, which always says I am a horrible, disgusting person..

The other part...tells me, that it's nobody's fault I'm that way, it's only me. My conclusion: I should just throw myself away.

[diablajayno]

I started fasting today. Maybe for 3 days or more idk. I hate food, my body and my weight. I can't see it anymore.

#caloric restriction #fasting

[diablajayno]

My life is so boring, I want to change, but I'm feeling down all the time and have no energy to do anything. I hate everything, but also think there is good out there. Everything is so pointless but I dream about happy life. Career, Family, friends all that is possible but at the same time I think I don't deserve any of that, because I'm miserable and never going to stop being like this.

I'm not sad enough to be really depressed, but not happy enough to live full life. I stuck between nothing and everything and don't know what to do and how to deal with it. Every day is a torture and I get angry because at some point I know what to do but this hole of emotions drags me down to until I can't get up anymore although I want to.

#thoughts #i'm sad #please help #can someone relate?

[diablajayno]

Ok so what kind of game am I playing right now?!?! When I clearly decided to take care of my eating habits, start losing weight be HEALTHY for once... MY fucking BRAIN brings up these cravings for literally anything. OMFG this is a nightmare. I really can't take this anymore.

[diablajayno]

I WILL BE SKINNY

I WILL START AGAIN AND AGAIN AND AGAIN AND AGAIN AND AGAIN

UNTIL I finally have those weightloss habits. Until I feel comfortable in my skin. Until I can wear cute outfits. Until I finally can say: No thanks I'm full... although I ate tiny, tiny portions.

I HATE WHO I AM NOW AND I WILL CHANGE FOR THE BETTER.

FUCK THE SNACKS! FUCK THE PASTA AND CHIPS! FUCK THE OVERSIZED SHIRTS WHICH COVER MY BELLY AND THE BAGGY JACKETS WHICH COVER MY BIG ARMS AND SWEAT IN HOT SUMMER T-T

I'M DONE WITH THIS SHIT!!

I WILL BE SKINNY

#getting skiny #caloric restriction #weightloss motivation #motivation #lose weight #weightloss #fasting

[diablajayno]

When you realise that your siblings got all the beauty genes and you're there like.... pure goblin :')

And of course my fatness makes my asymmetrical ugly features worse than they already are T-T

#i'm not okay #this is unfair #why is life like this

[diablajayno]

why am I always crying

#nonstop #crying

[diablajayno]

i'm starting intermittent fasting 20/4 and hope to be motivated like a couple months ago, where I really saw results and was happy about losing weight fast.

I will skip all the fucking snacks I'm craving, drink only water and will be eating low cal food, so I can finally reach my goal weight and stop dreaming about a flat stomach. I WILL FINALLY HAVE THE STOMACH I always wanted and nothing is going to stop me this time.

#start over #getting skiny #fasting #caloric restriction

[diablajayno]

WHY can't my arm, leg and facial hair just SLOW FUCKING DOWN with growing? Why the hurry???

Can my body-hair-growth-energy please get taken by my nails or... for example... HAIR ON MY HEAD??!!

#hairy woman #the struggle is real #i'm tired of shaving #shaving sucks #but i want smooth skin

[diablajayno]

I don't understand how i want to be skinny but at the same time having my 35th Snack with minimum 500 kcal today? really funny, isn't it?

omfg someone should shoot me.

#caloric restriction #getting skiny #weight gain #weightloss #lose weight #fasting #ed #disordered eating

[diablajayno]

Note to myself:

NEVER START EATING NORMALLY AFTER 3 DAYS OF FASTING.

Fucking congratulations to myself 👏👏 I gained the weight back I lost. FUCK ME FUXK EVERYTHING MAN I HATE IT HOW STUPID AM I ???!?!?

#fasting #weightloss

[diablajayno]

I'm fasting now (59 hours done) and dreaming about food at night and how i eat it. But even in my dreams I regret it. So when I wake up it gives me like a "second chance" So I can still do it and I didn't mess up ♡♡

#caloric restriction #fasting #weight gain #weightloss motivation #lose weight #weightloss #getting skiny