doctorvictoria10

[doctorvictoria10]

A stressful admission

Tags - ED admission, nervous patient, slight cardio, slight ageplay, medical trauma, comfort.

Bright lights. Beeping machines. Fast paced conversations. Orders.

“Get her hooked up to the sats monitor”

“What’s her heart rate doing now?”

“Her peripheral perfusion isn’t great, can we get an IV sited please?”

“She’s coming round! Chloe, can you hear me?” An older woman’s voice rings in her ears. “Chloe, squeeze my hand if you can hear me.” A warm hand slips into her own and brings her round that bit more. Chloe squeezes her hand as tightly as she can, but her fingers only move slightly.

“Well done Chloe.” The older woman praises. “She’s responding,” she calls out to the other voices.

“What’s happening?” Chloe croaks out quietly, still very disoriented. Her eyes focus on the woman next to her holding her hand. She’s maybe in her forties, with blonde hair and hazel eyes, a stethescope around her neck and glasss perched on the end of her nose.

“You’re at the hospital Chloe, you were found collapsed and brought in by the ambulance. Do you remember what happened?” She asked calmly.

“I, I don’t remember. I didn’t feel well, I was so tired, I had pain.” She trailed off, her brow furrowing trying to summon the blurry memories to the forefront of her mind.

“You had pain where?” The woman pushed.

“Here.” She replied, bringing her hand slowly up to her chest, and the woman’s eyes widened slightly.

A bustling noise of flimsy curtains alerted Chloe someone else had entered her room. The nurse looked up from Chloe to the person who had just entered.

“What’s the story?” A male voice asked in a rushed tone.

“This is Chloe, a twenty six year old female, found in a car park collapsed. Obs are stable now apart from a slight tachycardia, she has just come round and told me she felt unwell and had chest pain before she became unconscious. That’s all we have at the moment.” The nurse replied quickly.

“Okay, let’s get an IV in, bloods sent, fluids running. ECG. Have we got a blood glucose yet?” The male voice rushes. A wave of panic surges through Chloe, she hates hospitals, always has since she was a little girl and she had her appendix removed as an emergency surgery. And she hated not being involved in the conversation when it involved her body, especially if it was going to be unpleasant. She worked in obstetrics herself and knew how often doctors sadly didn’t respect their patients bodily autonomy.

“No, not yet, I can get a reading for you now if you like?” The nurse spoke and stood up, rummaging in the drawers by Chloe’s bed.

“Yes, let’s get that quickly and see what it is.” The doctor said.

Panic swelled again. “I don’t want that.” She spoke timidly, and she felt the gaze of the nurse and the doctor on her. “I’m not hypoglycaemic, I don’t need it. And I don’t need an IV. I’m going to go home now.” She tried to sit up but was too weak and she fell back onto the bed on her side.

The nurse looked at her with pity. “Chloe, we don’t know why you had chest pain and collapsed, but that’s not normal for a girl of your age, we need to rule things out so we can look for the issue and make you feel better.” She tried to calm her down.

“I already feel better, I’m fine! Can you call me a taxi please?” She tried to sound convincing. If she spoke with enough confidence maybe they’d let her go.

The nurse chuckled quietly. “No no, you won’t be going anywhere darling. Just relax so we can take care of you, it’s no good getting upset or worked up, it’ll just increase your heart rate more which we really don’t want! Are you from a medical background?” The nurse caught on.

“Yes, I work here at the hospital but over in the outpatient obstetric unit.” She spoke even quieter, she was feeling dizzy again.

The nurse nodded, preparing a lancet and cotton ball for a glucose reading. “Have you worked there long?” She tried to distract the anxious girl. The doctor was in the corner preparing an IV.

“Stop stop stop!” Chloe flailed. “I don’t want any of this! No needles! I want to go home! I hate hospitals! Please let me go home!” Her voice began to crack and her eyes began to shine with the promise of tears.

The nurse paused and looked at her slightly surprised. The doctor spun around too, walking up to her with the IV set in his gloved hands. “Chloe,” he began firmly, “are you going to let us look after you or not?” He continued.

“No.” She answered hurriedly. He sighed and looked at the nurse a little exasperated. Part of her felt bad, he’d probably had a really long day of difficult patients, she was just adding to his mental load but she couldn’t help herself - the panic she was feeling was taking on a mind of its own, taking over her body and putting her into a more childlike and defensive state of mind.

“Okay. What if we try and get a doctor from your department to come over and treat you? Would that be better?” He tried. Chloe thought it over. She knew they weren’t going to let her go like this, and she didn’t feel well at all. Having someone she knew do the scary bits might not make it as scary… even if the doctors she worked with weren’t necessarily the type of doctors she’d want to be looked after by, their bedside manner a little abrupt and harsh for her liking. Before she could properly think, she was nodding and pulling her knees close to her body, resting her elbows on them.

The doctor looked at her making herself as small as possible and knew she was retreating inwards. “Chloe, you said you don’t like hospitals, or being a patient I suppose is a better phrase as you work in one, but can I ask why that is?” He spoke a little more gently.

“When I was nine, I had my appendix out, it was an emergency and it was terrifying. I never want to feel like that again, so vulnerable and having my autonomy taken away from me…” she trailed off. The doctor nodded, he understood how traumatic emergency surgeries could be, especially to children who had a reduced understanding of the situation.

“I understand how that experience can make you feel nervous now. Thank you for telling me. I’ll try and organise for a doctor that you know to come over and sort your care. But in the meantime, please try to keep your heart rate down, or I will need to put that IV in myself.” He spoke. He meant for it to be comforting but he realised after the words had left his mouth that it sounded a bit like a threat. He cringed slightly at his words, knowing they may not be received well by the anxious girl in front of him. He patted her knee lightly and nodded to the nurse to follow him out of the room. “This is your call bell. If you feel worse please let us know.” He handed her a remote with a yellow button at the top.

“Okay, thanks.” Chloe spoke timidly and watched them leave the room. She sat there for what felt like an hour, in a tiny ball on the bed, she began to feel cold but there was no blanket in the room. Her anxiety was rolling in her chest, threatening to bubble up out of her. ‘Stay calm, stay calm’ she told herself on repeat, and then, there was a knock at the door.

Part 2?🖤

#story

[doctorvictoria10]

Hello Doctor, I was wondering what you might do to help a patient with baseline tachycardia? My heart beats so fast to keep my little body going all the time. I know I'm supposed to try to relax more but I just don't know how. It's even worse at doctors appointments because I get nervous being exposed for ekgs and things. They always tell me to stay still for the ekgs but it's so hard for me to do it by myself. I can't keep my heart rate down, especially when they touch me in more intimate places. The biggest problem is that when my heart rate goes up my blood pressure drops and I get all dizzy, then I can't even walk around by myself, and someone has to carry me.

This is a dilemma! We don't want you to wear out that little heart too much because it can lead to complications farther down the line. The best thing to do would be to keep you for observation for a night at least. We can't have you falling all over the place at home. It's far too dangerous. Of course, it's difficult for anybody to fall asleep in strange places, and it's especially scary when you're in the sleep lab surrounded by all those big lights and cameras and medical equipment and all those men in their rubber gloves just standing there, watching you. But we can help by covering your eyes with nice, soft gauze and tape so you can't see them. If you can't see them, they can't hurt you, right?

If that doesn't calm you down, we might just need to give you a shot of medicine in the arm so you're all relaxed for us, and you'll let us do whatever to you. Then we can take our measurements and press our stethoscopes all over your body and do our tests on you and you won't be scared at all. Even when we perform a nice, hours-long pelvic and genital examination, touching this and that, putting this into that, it will be a-okay. You might even get excited. If your heartrate starts to rise even just a bit, you'll get another shot in the arm. Must keep your heart nice and slow and steady so you be your healthiest. Eventually you'll fall asleep. Let Doctor take care of you.

[doctorvictoria10]

Remove your gown and put your feet in the stirrups… I'll be along shortly

AMBTS here. Tumblr did a deep clean of my original account (with fire) yesterday but the good news is, I never delete anything from my hard drive so it can be rebuilt. I am mostly upset with losing my saved drafts and all of the amazing things I've seen over the years on all of your amazing blogs. Thank you for your time and effort, friends.

Going forward maybe this will be strictly an erotica blog, although for the last year or so I was wanting to try headquartering in other sites (literotica? AO3?) for a spell. I have so many more stories swimming around in my head I need to put down on paper, and they are coming. This of course doesn't solve my problem of where to share nasty gifs and my disgusting porno drawings with you, but one thing at a time.

Meanwhile, I am neglecting a Fetlife account ("ambts") and an Instagram account ("andmybodytosurgeons").

Love (as always),

ambts

[doctorvictoria10]

🙈🙈

[doctorvictoria10]

my favorite fantasy at the moment is being a medical research subject for a research study on different anaesthetic gases.

i’m not unwilling per say, i’ve signed the consent forms and i genuinely want to go through with it. i can’t back out now. but i am terrified and they can’t pre-medicate me for it because it would mess with the results.

i do my best to cooperate, but the third IV stick pushes me over the edge. i fight them and the staff have to tie my entire body down, head to ankles, almost naked except for a sheet or a flimsy gown, covering me in tubes and electrodes and monitors. they’re not unkind about it at all — all the while they’re shushing me gently, telling me to just relax, that i’m safe, that they’ll take good care of me. their gloved hands are gentle but firm on my body, professional, competent, but also relentless.

they force a soft mask over my face, one person holding it with one hand and stroking my cheek gently with the other, telling me to just relax and breathe, that it’s just oxygen for now. another person holds my hand, interlacing their fingers with mine and squeezing it gently, trying to ground me a little. and all of that and the fresh air helps a little to calm me down.

but then it isn’t just oxygen anymore, and i’m made to breathe in something unpleasantly pungent and indescribable. i struggle in the restraints, but i’m held firm by straps and tubing and hands, the monitors beeping with every quick beat of my heart. maybe i try to hold my breath, to avoid taking in the stench of the gas.

the person at my head has complete control of the mask, and they hold it tightly to my face despite my thrashing. they squeeze the rebreathing bag a few times, or maybe they just wait until i’m out of breath and am forced to breathe.

the whole time they’re reassuring me confidently that it’s okay, that i’ll be asleep soon, that i’m doing so well, being so brave, being such a good subject. to just breathe deep and relax for them, shh, that’s right.

they talk me down, their voice soft and sweet as honey, narrating how relaxed i’m getting, how heavy my eyelids are, maybe dictating some of the data points they’re seeing to the people taking notes in the corner. everyone is watching me fade away. maybe there’s the coldness of a stethoscope on my chest, gloved fingers pressed to my throat, the flash of a penlight in my glazed eyes. i can barely keep them open despite my efforts to stay awake, and they roll back a few times as i try to avoid surrender.

but there are gentle hands running through my hair, interlaced with mine, rubbing my arm or my shoulder, and their soft voices encourage me to just go to sleep for them. and i do.

and i do it again. and again, and again.

[doctorvictoria10]

I know this looks super scary. I promise it will be over quick. Take a deep breath and try to relax. My nurse will hold your hand. https://www.instagram.com/p/Cnxl8L1roXKjB4Rv3fPGimXbBfVnxJT2FU_p4g0/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[doctorvictoria10]

[doctorvictoria10]

Hi doctor

Every time I get anxious (Even a bit anxious), my heart starts to beat rapidly; I also have chest pain when I'm very stressed!

What should I do, doctor?

I'm really worried! 😟

Hi! I’m sorry to hear you’re struggling with anxiety, it really is the worst isn’t it? I think from the sounds of things, the chest pain and palpitations are probably caused by the anxiety and stress as they seem to occur at the same time, so we should definitely make a plan for how we’re going to help you with that… but just to be sure we should probably run some extra tests.

First of all let’s do a blood test, and I can actually do that today for you… it’s okay, just a little pinch and we’ll have so much wonderful information about your body! I’m going to specifically be looking at your iron levels, because if they’re low we can give you some iron tablets or maybe even a transfusion and you’ll be feeling so much better.

I’ll also order a 24 hour cardiac monitor for you so we can watch what your little heart does over a 24 hour period and see if we can capture it doing anything naughty that it shouldn’t be doing.

And an echocardiogram to look at your heart in more detail, the chambers, the valves, the structure as a whole, how it works inside your chest. I might get you to run on a treadmill for me too so I can see how your heart responds to physical stress.

And of course, most importantly, we can talk about ways to help your anxiety and stress levels.

I hope that’s helpful, we can book a follow up appointment for a few days time to discuss your results. 🖤

#ask #doctorvictoria10

[doctorvictoria10]

Hi! I just found your page and was reading through some of your stories and now I feel very very little so I wanted to say thank you!🥰 I have a tummy ache and reading through your stories is so comforting 🧸

Aw, messages like this make me so happy! I’m so glad I’ve been able to make you feel that way.

I’m sorry you have a tummy ache (or had a tummy ache), lots of tea and heat packs, hope you feel better soon little one! 🖤

#ask #doctorvictoria10

[doctorvictoria10]

Felt cute. A stethoscope would’ve made this 10x better. 🖤

#doctorvictoria10

[doctorvictoria10]

Why do you call adults babies? Trying to understand.

Hey! Some adults like to roleplay as a younger age. It can feel freeing and liberating to ‘let go’ and become a younger version of yourself. Some people like to do this alone, and some people like to do it with others. It’s called ageplay and can be sexual or non sexual, and happens for lots of different reasons, individual to the person. There is also age regression which is different to age play and is almost always non sexual, but that’s to discuss another time as this blog focuses on ageplay mixed with medfet.

This blog is a safe place for those people, so if this isn’t for you, feel free to move along and have a lovely day. I’m also happy to answer any other questions on message if you’d prefer.🖤

#anon #feel free to add anything #or clarify #if I haven’t explained it great #love you all #doctorvictoria10 #ask

[doctorvictoria10]

Today I woke up a little bit early and read your stories before going to college and then work. Made me feel like real life didn't exist for a while. Thank you

Thank you so much for this, you’re so kind! I’m glad they gave you a little escape 🖤

#ask #doctorvictoria10

[doctorvictoria10]

Oh sweetheart, your heart is beating so fast! You better try and slow it down or I’ll have to cut it out. 🖤

#text #doctorvictoria10

[doctorvictoria10]

😘😘

Do you have any doctor friends on here?😳

@doctorvictoria10 @andmybodytosurgeons and @doctorsawyer are the best ones 🥰

Shout out to @resus-girl for the cardio content 😍

[doctorvictoria10]

Doctor, I’m having trouble holding my bladder. I keep having to go every 30-40 minutes. It’s interrupting my day and my sleep. Can you help?

Hmm. Come have a lie down on the exam bed and let’s try to get to the bottom of this together. Do you feel this is more of a physical problem, or a psychological one?

What kind of headspace are you in when this happens? Are you finding this happens more if you’re:

A) in your little space (if you have one)?

Or

B) is it when you’re feeling all big and grown up?

If you answered yes to the former… then there’s no problem at all! You’re just a little babie who needs diapers, congratulations.

If you answered yes to the latter… then that is a different kettle of fish all together. We’d need to book you in for a more in-depth exploration of your bladder. Ideally a cystoscopy first to check for any abnormalities in the lining of your urethra and bladder. If this is normal, I’d like to try some retention with you. We’d insert a catheter through your urethra into your bladder, and we’d reverse it, filling it up with about 800mls of saline. I’d cap off the catheter and make you hold it, feeling the sensation of a full bladder but not being able to relieve yourself because the catheter tubing will be blocking your urethra. Eventually I’ll remove the catheter and make you hold it for another 10 minutes before you release. We can do this a few times to build up your pelvic floor strength in that area and hopefully to regain your bladder control. Several of these sessions would be required. In the mean time, you might just have to wear diapers whilst we get it under control. Oh hey, come on. They’re not the worst things in the world, and I know you’d look so sweet in one.

#ask #doctorvictoria10

[doctorvictoria10]

Jade&Doctor Aldaric

Part two

Sara led her down the corridor away from the hustle and bustle of the clinic to a more secluded section. Sara held a blanket around Jade's shoulders which was long enough to cover her body, as the lavender gown she was in didn’t offer much coverage. Eventually they came to a stop. Sara took out a key to unlock the door in front of them, then switched the light on as they stepped inside together. Jade was taken aback. Even in her little headspace she could recognise this was definitely not a normal clinic room or situation. The room was also painted lavender but was almost split in half. There was an examination couch, desk and chair with storage for medical supplies at one end, and the other end had what looked like an adult sized baby crib and a rocking chair next to it. Sara gave her a reassuring nod as she continued to lead her into the room, turning on lamps here and there.

“Okay Jade, have a lay down for me.” She pulled the side of the crib down and gestured for her to get in and lay down. When Jade didn’t move an inch, Sara stepped forward and slid her arm around her waist, effectively guiding her to the crib. “It’s okay honey, nothing scary here. I’m just going to get you comfy and relaxed so we can monitor your heart a little better. Nothing to be worried about.” She smiled reassuringly, sensing Jade's apprehension. Jade eventually let herself be guided and laid down.

Jade removed her pacifier before reluctantly saying, “I’m confused, why am I in a crib and not a bed?” Her voice was still tiny.

Sara laughed lightly. “Because you’re a baby honey. Babies don’t lay in beds do they? They’d fall out and bump their heads! Cribs are much safer for babies. I might be called out of the room at any time so I have to make sure you’re safe.” She smiled, as if it was obvious.

Jade processed that for a moment and then decided that indulging in her biggest secret with these people who seemed very knowledgeable about adults regressing couldn’t be the worst thing in the world. She had been so stressed out lately with university and bills. It would be nice to be taken care of even if it was just for an afternoon at some crazy clinic by a doctor and a nurse who may also be crazy. Jade thought about how really this is what she had wanted all along, and being ashamed held no purpose here, so she let it go.

Sara came to her side, holding some kind of supplies. Assuming it was the heart rate monitor Jade didn’t take much notice until Sara started lifting her gown and coaxing her legs open. “What are you doing?” Jade stuttered turning red when she realised that Sara was in fact holding a diaper, baby powder and lotion!

“You heard your doctor, honey. He doesn’t trust you not to have an accident! And you might be here for quite some time, so I’m going to make you comfortable and get you into a diaper. Then you won’t have to worry about big girl problems like trying not to pee yourself.” She said so matter-of-factly. Her bluntness only made Jade blush more. She increased the pace sucking on her pacifier to comfort herself as Sara went about putting a diaper on her.

Once she was all sorted Sara began hooking her up to the heart rate monitor. Even Jade could tell her heart was beating too fast from the quick rhythm that was beeping quietly in the background. She rubbed her eyes feeling a little sleepy all of a sudden. Sara lent over her and brushed a strand of hair out of her face and adjusted Mr Teddy so he was tucked under her arm. She pulled the blanket over her up to her shoulders and twisted a baby mobile toy out of the wall. Dangling over her were soft clouds, stars and moons. Sara pressed a button and they began rotating round whilst a soft lullaby played.

“No wonder you’re tired Jade, you’ve had a big day! Why don’t you have a little rest now? I’ll just be in the corner over here keeping an eye on your heart rate. I’m not leaving you alone, just rest.” Sara spoke softly. Jade couldn’t help but follow her orders, especially when Sara turned the main lights out, just leaving a little desk lamp on where she was sitting. Her eyes felt heavy, heavy, so heavy.

Jade woke to quiet talking, she turned her head slightly and saw it was Doctor Aldaric and Sara. She listened, Sara was updating him about the diaper and her heart rate. She felt excited to see him again, but also nervous because she knew why he was here - for needles. She decided to close her eyes and try to look like she was still asleep so maybe he wouldn’t disturb her to give her the shots. Unfortunately the beeping on the heart rate monitor increased, giving her away entirely. Both voices stilled and she knew they were both looking at her and the monitor. They knew she was awake and pretending to be asleep.

Doctor Aldaric was at her side, quietly cooing to her to open her eyes. She did so reluctantly but felt so content the moment she looked into his eyes, he smiled gently at her.

“Jade, time to wake up sweetie. How are you feeling?” He spoke softly.

She groaned slightly, “Mmn nervous. No needles please.” She frowned slightly in anxiety.

Doctor Aldaric took her hand in his. “I know you’re scared sweetie, but they’re really not that bad, I promise. I’ll give them to you and Sara will be right here too, there’s nothing to worry about. Can you be my brave girl?” He tried to encourage her.

Jade shook her head a little. “Can’t, it's too scary.” Her eyes began to water slightly hearing Sara prep syringes across the room.

“Okay, okay. Let’s just do one thing at a time okay? We’ll break it down so it’s not as overwhelming. First of all, I’m just going to sit you up okay?” He slid his arm around her shoulders and helped her into a sitting position, disconnecting her from the heart rate monitor. “We can stop this now because your heart rate was normal while you were sleeping, you’re just a little scared while you’re awake. That’s understandable.”

As she shifted into a sitting position she felt an unpleasant feeling between her legs. Just as it registered what had happened, Doctor Aldaric began peeling the back of her diaper away from her body to check it. Mortified was an understatement.

“Oh my gosh, I’ve wet myself?” Jade began to cry, the pacifier falling from her mouth. “I don’t know how that happened!”

Pulling her into a side hug, he began to shhh her and rock her. “It’s okay Jade, it’s okay. We were expecting this to happen after you dropped down an age, that’s why you’re in a diaper remember? We were expecting this to happen, it’s not a shock and it’s perfectly fine.” He reassured.

“But…but… I didn’t think it would actually happen!”

“You’re telling me you’ve never wet yourself whilst you were little before?” He looked at her intensely.

“No! Only if I was doing it intentionally in the shower or something.” She whimpered, burying her face in his chest. He smelt clean and like sandalwood.

“It’s okay, you don’t need to get upset. I know you’re feeling a lot of emotions, we’re going to look after you. Let’s get these needles done and then we can get you into a clean diaper, hmm?” He planned, hoping Jade would agree.

“I don’t want them” she sobbed lightly.

“Jade, we’re doing them. You’re okay, I just want you to hold onto Mr Teddy.” He spoke a little firmer. Sara brought over the needles and Doctor Aldaric snapped on a pair of gloves, allowing her to cry. He knew from experience that some little patients just needed the catharsis of crying and that was perfectly okay with him. He knew she was scared but he recognised how important the needles were for her and he took it as his duty to make sure she was medically taken care of. Babies couldn’t be trusted to make their own decisions about their medical care.

Sara sat down on the bed beside her and began wrapping a blanket around her shoulders and then incorporating her arms. She wrapped her tightly and then positioned her own body so she could take Jade in a cuddle. “Breathe honey. Just breathe.” Sara stroked her hair and shielded her eyes from the needles. She felt so safe being wrapped and held, she couldn’t help but snuggle into Sara.

Doctor Aldaric cleaned the side of her thigh and then pinched the muscle between his fingers. He looked up at Jade who was still crying but had her face buried in Sara’s shoulder as she held her. “Sharp scratch Jade, good girl.” He pierced her skin with the needle and once it was all the way in, slowly began injecting the medicine. “Good little girl.” He responded to her whimpers between cries. As soon as the medicine had all been injected he quickly withdrew the needle and applied a cotton ball, holding it to the injection site.

He then moved onto the second injection. He slid the blanket down her arm so he could access it and began cleaning it with another alcohol wipe. He primed the needle but Jade started to wriggle. Sara just held her tighter and Doctor Aldaric steadied her arm with his spare hand as he quickly delivered the second injection. She whimpered loudly. “Sorry sweetie, sorry sorry. I know it’s not nice.” He held the cotton ball to her arm as he withdrew the needle.

They allowed Jade to cry quietly for another minute into Sara’s shoulder. They both knew this was scary for a lot of their little patients and a lot of emotions could be stirred.

“Okay, okay let’s get you comfy now. That was the hard bit done, you’re going to be fine.” He cooed to his tiny patient. “Let’s lay you down and get you out of that wet diaper, I'm sure that doesn’t feel very nice.” Jade allowed herself to be laid down. She felt so vulnerable and the wetness between her legs was making her feel even smaller in her headspace. Doctor Aldaric quickly had a pair of pale blue gloves on and was un-taping her diaper. Her cheeks flushed red and she covered her face with her hands and Mr Teddy. She knew he’d seen her there only hours ago but it still felt so embarrassing, especially now he was seeing her after she had peed herself. He chuckled lightly, “Nothing to be embarrassed about, Jade.” She could tell he was smiling from the tone of his voice.

She kept her eyes tightly shut as he cleaned her, sprinkled baby powder and then put her in a new diaper. He hummed while he did it, he was very methodical and quick, he must do this often she thought. Her thigh and arm started to ache as the sting subsided and it made her feel a bit grumpy.

He watched her face for a second and saw she was frowning as the tears were drying on her cheeks. “What’s wrong sweetie? Doesn’t that feel better?” He patted her tummy where the top of her diaper ended.

“Is hurtin’” she looked at her arm and leg sadly.

“Oh angel, it’s not so bad, it will feel better soon. We’re just going to do a quick blood draw and then that’s all the owies out of the way.” He spoke softly but firmly.

Jade's eyes became wide again, no more needles! She shook her head frantically and went to open her mouth to protest, but Doctor Aldaric swiftly pushed her pacifier into her mouth before she could get any words out. She blushed instantly, just as she had earlier when he’d surprised her with the pacifier.

“That’s better isn’t it?” He chimed. Jade watched him prepare the blood draw as Sara tucked her tightly into the crib leaving just her arm out. She turned the cloud mobile on above her head and the soft lullaby began again. Jade watched it in a daze as they tied a tourniquet around her upper arm and palpated a vein. She barely registered what was happening, all she could focus on was sucking on her paci and watching the clouds float round above her head.

A sharp scratch brought her back into the present and caused tears to form in her eyes. She looked down whimpering to see the thick needle in her arm taking her blood, and Sara firmly holding her arm down. She made eye contact with Doctor Aldaric who just gave her a sympathetic smile but continued connecting and disconnecting bottles to the end of the needle, filling them up with deep red blood - her blood.

Seeing the protest and struggle that was about to come, Sara began shushing Jade and stroking her hair out of her face, wiping her tears as they fell. “Not long honey, just a few more seconds, you’re being so brave. I’m so impressed!” As Sara finished talking, Doctor Aldaric removed the needle and applied another cotton ball, which Sara took over putting pressure on as he dropped the blood bottles into a clear specimen bag.

“Jade, you were just the best!” He praised, helping Sara to comfort her. He sat down on the side of the crib and took her hand in his. “You’ve been so brave I think you should get to keep Mr Teddy, don’t you think Sara?” Sara nodded and smiled at them both. That cheered Jade up a little bit. Whilst she had found the needles very distressing and this whole experience strange, she had also enjoyed being taken care of like the baby she knew she was. She embraced it and smiled shyly at doctor Aldaric through wet eyelashes, squeezing her new teddy tightly to her.

Doctor Aldaric patted her hand and then stood up. “My best little patient. I think we should keep you here tonight in the clinic so we can keep an eye on you and make sure you’re okay. Then tomorrow, when you’re feeling a little bigger, we can let you go home.” He decided and Jade nodded.

“And what if she isn’t bigger tomorrow?” Sara asked, half joking, half serious.

“Then I guess she’ll just have to stay here and be our little patient for a while longer.” He smiled at Jade.

Wow, that really would be something, Jade thought to herself. Maybe that was just what she needed. She shifted her gaze back to the mobile, sucking on her paci, she felt sleepy again. Giving herself permission to be her most authentic self - a baby - was definitely the start of a new chapter. And with that she drifted off into a peaceful nap, watching the clouds go round and round.🖤

#story #doctorvictoria10

[doctorvictoria10]

Jade&Doctor Aldaric

PROMPT: May I have a story about a baby's first time to the doctor, but they keep insisting they’re an adult and won't behave?

I tried my best to fulfill this, but have deviated unintentionally a little with the not behaving - she is relatively good! Let me know what you think and if you’d be interested in part 2.

“Jade, take a seat and Doctor Aldaric will be with you soon.” The receptionist called from over her desk.

Jade took a seat in the bright waiting room, she was nervous for her appointment, she hadn’t been to the doctors for so long but the headaches she was getting during her period every month were getting to be too much. She twiddled her thumbs in her lap trying to take her mind off the sterile smell and posters of people getting vaccines. Needles always gave her the icks.

Suddenly a calm male voice appeared in the doorway. “Jade, would you like to follow me?” A tall figure called to her. Her anxiety rose even further but she made herself follow him into his consultation room. She took a seat on the smaller chair positioned in front of his desk whilst he sat down and tapped something into the computer. She studied his form: dirty blonde hair pulled back into a low bun, glasses that framed his cool blue eyes and a jawline that could cut glass. Goddammit.

“Okay, I’m Doctor Aldaric, Jade. How can I help you today?” He spoke just as softly as he had called her name previously, his voice was low and steady. His cool eyes were watching her intently for a response that didn’t seem to come.

“Um…um… headaches” she spoke slowly although her tone made it sound more like a question. She looked down at her pink socks and silly Care Bear backpack.

“Are you sure about that?” He chuckled. “Doesn’t sound like you know why you’re here.” He tapped some more on his computer. “Looks like you’ve not seen a GP for over four years. Why would that be?” He kept his eyes on the screen this time.

Flustered was an understatement. “Um, I guess my parents always used to book appointments for me, and now I’m an adult and I have to do it myself, I uh, doctor visits make me nervous I guess.” She stumbled through her words, not wanting to look at him.

“Yeah I get it. You’ve got this adult body now, but you’re still a little girl inside, right?” He didn’t miss a beat. Jade locked eyes with him as her mouth fell open slightly in disbelief at what he’d just said. She felt so called out. “Don’t worry princess, I’ve got you.” He winked at her subtly.

She went to open her mouth but no words came out. She didn’t even know what to say to that. He stood from his chair behind his desk, quickly draping his stethoscope around his neck and rolling his shirt sleeves. “Right, let’s get you out of that pretty dress and into something more practical.” He smiled reassuringly. Before she had time to process he was lifting her dress up over her arms. “Upsy-Daisy. There we go.” He quickly removed her bra in a swift movement and just as quickly had a crinkly lavender coloured gown on her. Her cheeks were burning in embarrassment, and still she couldn’t find her words. He guided her over to the examination couch but her legs stopped moving halfway there. Memories of painful and scary things on that couch flashed to the front of her mind, and with them came an anxiety so strong she felt like she wanted to run and hide.

“Hey there, are you doing okay? You’ve gone a little pale, I know you said you get nervous at the doctors but I promise I’m one of the nice ones. I’ve got you.” He smiled again but his eyes looked concerned. He lifted her easily onto the couch so she was sitting, legs dangling off the edge. He pulled something out from one of the drawers under the couch and Jade held her breath.

“I want you to hold Mr Teddy okay? He’s going to keep you safe.” He handed her the softest bear she had ever felt and her anxiety faded a little, she clutched him tightly to her chest and then caught herself drifting into the realms of her little space. No, this was not the time!

“I’m not a little girl you know!” Jade spoke timidly but firmly.

“Sure you’re not, sweetie.” Doctor Aldaric grinned at her. “Just going to start off looking at your eyes, then I’ll look in your ears.” He spoke softly, she couldn’t help but relax a little as he manoeuvred her head to examine different parts. Suddenly his fingertips were pressing on the side of her neck. “Strong pulse, and lymph nodes feel normally sized. Not tender when I push here?” He squeezed her neck slightly and a small whimper came out.

“Nope” she responded quickly.

“Okay, the next bit isn’t very pleasant but it is necessary. I need you to open your mouth and poke your tongue out. I’m going to examine the inside and your throat.” He turned away from her to put a pair of latex gloves on. The white gloves made a nice contrast to his tanned forearms. “Go ahead,” he spoke.

Jade opened her mouth and poked her tongue out as instructed. He wasted no time in sliding two fingers into her mouth, along the inside of her cheek, then the other one. The latex taste reminded her of her pacifier. Shit, her pacifier was in her bag! She glanced over and saw it was visible from on the floor. Panic flashed over her again, this doctor was already treating her like a baby, she didn’t need to add any fuel to his fire.

“Okay this is the unpleasant bit, bear with me.” He slid his two fingers towards the back of her throat, then down, palpating the walls. Jade couldn’t help herself and she gagged. He didn’t remove his fingers and he continued to palpate. She continued to gag around him until her reflexes kicked in and she grabbed his wrist and pulled his fingers out of her throat. She gasped for air and her eyes watered a lot. She couldn’t let go of his wrist. He watched her carefully before getting a tissue and wiping away the watery tears. “Sorry, sorry, I know that wasn’t nice. You did well, sweetheart, and your throat feels normal. You’re okay.” He comforted as she slowly released his hand and tightly gripped Mr Teddy instead. He smiled lightly seeing her using the comfort stuffy. “Good girl.” He stroked her hair. “Need you to open up once more so I can feel again.”

Jade shook her head, an anxious look flooding her face.

“Just the inside of your mouth, not your throat, promise.” He encouraged.

Slowly Jade opened her mouth again, although not as wide and not as enthusiastically this time. Just as slowly he slid his fingers in again and ran them over her tongue. “Suck” he ordered, and she quickly found herself sucking. God this was so embarrassing. “Does this make you feel calmer?” He asked softly, and she gently nodded her head. “Do you have a pacifier?” He asked innocently. Jade tried to look confused but he saw right through her. “Surely a sweet little baby like you has a pacifier hmm?” He coaxed.

She couldn’t help it, as her body relaxed sucking his latex gloved fingers, her eyes drifted over to her open bag, he followed her gaze and saw the pacifier in it, it was impossible to miss. It was a baby pink adult pacifier with little love hearts on it.

“Oh there we go.” He said excitedly. Slowly he removed his fingers to her distress, then his gloves. He walked over to her bag and pulled out the pacifier. “You might want this for the next parts of the exam, I find little girls such as yourself can get a little fussy.” He smirked.

In her hazy headspace Jade managed. “Am not baby.” Hearing herself struggling to find words made her blush even more, and made her desperate for the comfort of her pacifier.

“Okay big girl. You’re okay.” He cooed as he walked towards her and slipped the pacifier between her lips, the sucking started immediately.

“Good little girl. Let’s get you laying down and comfy, hm?” Jade let Doctor Aldaric manoeuvre her body so she was flat on the couch. He slid a thin pillow under her head and draped a blanket over her body. Her lavender gown wasn’t giving much coverage. She held onto the teddy tightly as he removed her underwear and placed her legs in the stirrups. “Little girls shouldn’t be wearing these kinds of underwear, what if you were to have an accident? A pull-up or even a diaper would be much better for you.” He scolded lightly. Jade watched as he threw her underwear in the bin. She would fish them out after she finished this exam, what was she meant to go home in otherwise?

As he started putting various instruments and contraptions on a little silver table she looked around the room properly for the first time. It was lavender like her gown and there were pictures of teddies and animals on the walls. It looked a lot better suited to being a paediatric room than an adult one, did he forcibly regress all his patients or was it just her with her too-readable face and babyish mannerisms? She thought about how this appointment could’ve gone differently if she’d only been more confident and less scared. Maybe she was a silly little girl after all.

“Okay, before we get to this,” he gestured to the tray, “I’ll just have a quick listen to your chest.” He put the earbuds of the stethoscope in and held the bell to her chest, exposing it a little. “Sorry it’s a bit cold.” He smiled. He listened intently for about a minute and then moved it around a bit to different areas of her chest. “It sounds fine but it is beating a little faster than I’d like. I expect it’s probably due to the situation but I’m going to attach an oxygen probe onto your finger just so I can monitor you okay?” He stated, they both knew why her heart was beating so fast. This doctor who she’d known for 20 minutes was now delving into her deepest secrets, like she hadn’t kept this part of herself carefully tucked away for the last however many years.

He sat on a stool between her legs and pulled on a fresh pair of gloves. A black pair this time. Her toes curled in the stirrups as she carefully watched him lubricate a metal speculum. “Um, nu uh, gonna hurt!” Was all she could muster, she felt so pathetic.

He looked at her with sympathy in his eyes. “It’s not going to hurt sweetheart, it’s just so I can see deep inside you to make sure you’re all healthy, lay your head down little angel.” He cooed to her.

She resisted and tried to close her legs. “I’m not a baby!” She repeated for the second time.

His gaze became a little firmer. “No? Would a big girl suck on her pacifier and hug the teddy her kind doctor gave her when she got scared? Would her vocabulary become so limited she can only use little words when she gets flustered? We both know you’re a little baby, sweetie. You need to stop resisting it when we both know it’s who you are and what you really want. You’ll feel better when you just let go, hm?” He gently rubbed her leg. “It’s okay, I’ve got you.”

The sudden influx of confrontation and embarrassment mixed with feeling seen and cared for had a strange effect on her, and she tried her best to ‘let go’.

Seeing her relax a little he dipped his finger in a tub of lubricant. “Okay, just a little cold now, nice deep breaths.” He instructed as he circled the entrance of her vagina with a lubricated finger tip and then gently pressed in. Jade gasped a little and he could feel her tense slightly. “You’re okay, it’s only one finger, you can handle that can’t you sweetie.” He moved it around to lubricate her walls, then withdrew. He lined the speculum up to her entrance. “I need you to give me two big breaths now and relax as much as you can, good girl.”

Jade took her two big breaths, at the exhale of her last one Doctor Aldaric eased the speculum into her. She knew it was a small speculum but it still felt big to her and she was too aware of the cold metal shifting uncomfortably inside of her as it was positioned correctly. She held Mr Teddy tightly and shut her eyes. “Little bit more pressure now Jade, you’re okay.” He comforted. The blades were opened slowly and it was only a little uncomfortable. “Just going to do a quick swab of your cervix, deep breath.” He coaxed.

Jade had never had a swab of her cervix, she didn’t know what to expect. Suddenly she felt a deep poking and then a little cramp. “Owwww, nu uh, out out!” She begged. After the swab had been capped, he quickly removed the speculum.

“Hey you did so well, why have we got tears, hm? That wasn’t so bad was it?” He spoke calmly as he wiped the lubricant off of her outside.

Jade settled a little but could help a slight pout. Her hips were starting to ache from the stirrups and she suddenly felt aware of her exposure. She decided she was done with the stirrups and began lifting her legs down.

“Uh what are you doing there Jade? We’re not done yet.” He spoke firmly.

“Hips are hurtin’, and don’t like.” Was all she could get herself to say, what had happened to her? Her cheeks flooded red again.

He smirked and then his eyes softened considerably. “Okay then, how about we finish up the rest on your tummy? We’ve only got one little thing left to do anyway.” He negotiated.

Jade obliged and allowed him to help her roll over onto her tummy. It was then she realised the back of the gown didn’t close properly and her butt was fully on display. She quickly covered herself with her hands. She watched the doctor pick something up from the tray and dip it into lubricant. She whined when she realised it was a thermometer. “Can’t it go in my mouth?” She pleaded knowing exactly what he was going to do.

“Babies have their temperatures taken rectally, and as we’ve already established, you are a baby. Hug Mr Teddy, won’t take long.” He spoke as he moved her hand out of the way.

Jade whined again but knew there was no use fighting, he would get his way as he had with the whole exam so far. She focused on trying to relax her body and the softness of the teddy’s fur.

He slowly parted her cheeks with his long fingers, then she felt his gloved fingertip circle her tight hole, coating it in a slippery lubricant. “Okay, breathe in… and out.” On her exhale he slowly slid the thermometer into her. She squealed and rocked her hips a little, it felt gross having something in there. Her muscles involuntarily squeezed at the intrusion. Doctor Aldaric chuckled “I can feel you trying to push it out, it’s not coming out for another 30 seconds so we can get an accurate reading, honey. Just relax.” And with that he pushed it in a little deeper maybe just to prove his point.

In her head Jade counted to 30, she was so relieved when he finally removed it. “Temperature is normal, which is good, but your heart rate still hasn’t settled.” He said, sounding a little concerned as he looked at the monitor above her. Gently he wiped the lubricant off of her hole and assisted her to sit up on the table. Jade couldn’t make herself look him in the eye, she felt so embarrassed and little.

“Jade I have another patient coming in soon for something rather urgent, but I’m not happy to send you home with this heart rate, and we’ve also not finished our check up. As it’s been so long since your last one I want to be really thorough. Would you be happy to go with one of my nurses to the relaxation room for a while where they can monitor your heart rate. Then after I’m done with the next few patients I can come and finish off the exam?” He asked, a serious expression framing his face.

She reluctantly removed the pacifier from her mouth to reply to him, although again not much came out. “If I have to… what else do you need to do?” Her voice was tiny.

He smiled, relieved she had agreed to stay. “Just a few little things, we haven’t got any recent blood results from you, and I can see you’ve not had any booster vaccines for a while.” He said gently, anticipating she wouldn’t be thrilled about that.

“Needles?” Her eyes went wide.

“Shhh, it’s okay, not many, you’re a brave girl, you’ll be okay and I’ll help you.” He calmed her and put her pacifier back in her mouth. “I’m going to call for one of the nurses now, okay? She’ll take you through to the next room and get you comfy, if you need anything you can ask her.” He assured her.

A moment later a nurse in a pale blue uniform came in, she was maybe mid thirties and had the most beautiful make up on. She looked so kind.

“Sara, this is Jade. Jade, this is Sara. Jade is relatively tachycardic and I’m not comfortable sending her home yet. I expect it’s due to nerves but I don’t want to assume. If you could hook her up to the monitor and when I’m free I’ll come and finish our check up.” He instructed, and suddenly Jade became aware she had the pacifier still in her mouth, her underwear were in the bin, and her cheeks were flushed red.

Doctor Aldaric chuckled. “As you can see she’s a precious little one, so I’d recommend getting her in a pull up as quickly as possible. You can never trust when a little baby’s bladder is going to get too full.”

Sara laughed with him, at Jade's expense. This really wasn’t what she had planned for her afternoon. “Come on sweetie, let’s get you all sorted.” Sara held out her hand for Jade to hold onto. “Don’t forget Mr Teddy.” 🖤

Let me know what you think, and if you’d like a part 2!

#story #doctorvictoria10