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donquxiotes · 2 years

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# collaboration post ¡! @donquxiotes

tiger hybrid + kazutora <3

warnings: gender neutral reader, reader has unspecified anatomy, yandere kazutora, manipulation, obsessive behavior, possessiveness, mentions of hybrid neglect, mentions of murder (nothing explicit), guilt trip, anal fingering (giving), hair pulling, hands free orgasm and spit.

you had recently graduated as a veterinarian, after so many years of studying your ass off, now you can finally do what you love—helping animals, specially hybrids.

hybrids are usually left at shelters, most of them spend all their lifetime there. others belong to hybrid zoos, where they're sometimes forced to do things like mating, entertaining people, etc. some are more lucky and get adopted, but there's still a lot of misconceptions about hybrids so it's not very common yet.

that's why you decided to work at a shelter a fellow colleague recommended you to, since it took exotic hybrids who tend to be the ones that are met with the worst fate. you'll take care of them and make sure they find an owner or send them to sanctuaries where you know they'll be okay.

you gave all the hybrids the same care and treatment, but there was a particular one that stands out more than the others. kazutora, a tiger hybrid. he's always away from the others, rarely talks and he's still very wary of you. when is his time of getting checked he's tense all the time and doesn't look you at eye, you once tried to pet his ears while checking him but he immediately moved away, which was odd because the other hybrids allowed you to with no problems. so you decided to approach him on a more personal manner, you wanted to know why he was like this and also help him overcome it, not only because it was your job but also because you genuinely cared.

now you're here. he's sitting in front of you after you called him to have a "private meeting". his eyes are glued to the floor, strands of hair cover a part of his face and he honestly looks like he's ready to get out of here.

you sigh. this is not going to be easy, you can feel it already.

“kazutora, do you have any idea of why i called you?” you hear him murmur something, but it's so quiet you can't make out anything he said. you sweat and clear your throat trying to not pressure him. “...could you repeat that?–”

“please don't send me back!” he screams making you flinch. your eyes met his for the first time, and you can finally see what's probably been bothering him all this time. fear. “i won't do it again! i won't kill anyone, just– please! i don't want to be there! i promise–” you cut him off before he keeps begging.

“calm down, kazutora. i would never do that, okay? come on, breath” he's sobbing pitifully, tears falling from his wide eyes non-stop. he isn't anywhere near to calming down.

feeling helpless, you do what comes to your mind first, give him a hug. your arms circle around him, one hand petting his long hair and soft ears while the other rubs his back, and you hide his face on your neck, not caring about the wet spot he'll leave on your new shirt. “shhh... that won't happen, alright? i'll always be here for you, kazutora. i won't allow you to be hurt ever again” you feel his breath hitch on your neck, then he nuzzles your shoulder.

“do you promise?” his shy muffled voice makes you smile. “yes, i promise” you kiss his hair which causes him to start purring, and your heart involuntarily melts at the sound.

how stupid of you to fall right where he wanted you to.

it's been a few weeks since that encounter with kazutora, and his attitude changed a lot since then. the thing is you don't know if it's a bad or a good thing.

“of course it's a good thing, what am i thinking” you scold yourself with a mumble. “at least he's not scared of his own shadow now”

at first his clingy behavior was cute, he would follow you around and look at you with his big shiny eyes then ask to be pet. or he would take any opportunity to hug you and nuzzle your chest with a big smile, it was adorable, really.

but now you can't even check on the other hybrids without him getting upset, and he gets really upset. he would hiss, showing his big sharp fangs and restrict your arms to avoid you touched them, then he would take you away and cry rivers on your arms babbling things you don't really understand. and no, he will not stop crying until you agree with what he just did (and kiss his cheeks).

a few months into this same situation, and it was already collectively known among your coworkers and the hybrids that only he was allowed to be attended by you, only he can receive your pets and of course, only he can be the one you give your attention to. it wasn't even debatable, it was a fact.

“[name]! glad you're here, your baby it's making a fuss already” said your coworker teasingly as you enter the shelter. “that reminds me, i've been wondering why haven't you adopted him? he doesn't even want anyone that's not you to look his way...”

“oh- uhm well, i just spend more time here at work than my home and i wouldn't want to leave him alone for so long, and also adopting a tiger hybrid isn't really that easy” they nodded in agreement and hummed.

“makes sense but-” a loud bang that came from kazutora's room interrupted them, making you both sweat. “i think you should go” you nod and move quickly towards his room.

you open the door and close it behind you. the room was a mess. the bed sheets were ripped, his food was scattered everywhere, the few clothes he owns were thrown on the floor —along with the closet—, and he was sitting on a corner, back facing you, his tail moving on a distressed motion.

“tora...?” you trail off, as you get closer to him you notice he's shaking, and when you're an arm away from him he turns around. “don't touch me! go away!” he's hissing at you, his ears flat against his head and you also notice his claws poking out.

“what's wrong? let me-” “no! leave me alone!” a sob comes out of his throat and suddenly, he's full on crying but he isn't allowing you to comfort him this time. “you don't want me!” he manages to say with a wobbly voice. “you don't love me, you- you liar!” he rubs his puffy eyes and turns his back to you again.

“...what? why do you think that?” you're beyond confused at this point. racking your mind to remember any moment where you said or did something to make him think that, but nothing really comes to your mind.

he scoffs and slightly turns his head, his long hear covering his face. “don't act like you don't know. i heard you. you don't want to adopt me” he says with a small voice. your eyes widen with realization. how careless of you.

“that's not what i meant. you got it wrong kazutora” his left ear twitches and he just remains silent, making you understand he wanted you to continue. “i do love you, and i do want to adopt you but-” “then do it. if you love me then do it” he interrupts you, he's not asking, he's demanding it. leaving you no room to argue unless you want to tick him again.

“i... okay, i will. i'll take you home” his ears perk up then he turns around abruptly and jumps on your arms, making you fall backwards on the floor, him on top of you. he nuzzles your neck and purrs more loudly than he ever has while mumbling thank you's, you're kinda taken back by his sudden change of attitude, but that thought quickly washes away when you feel him humping your lap.

your cheeks heat up and you grab his hips “tora? wha-” “that makes me your mate! we're mates now, [name]” he says with a lovesick look. he then turns around and sticks out his bum, wiggling his hips. “claim me~ you have to claim me as your mate” “here? we can't do that here” he sighs and turns to you again crossing his arms. “you said you love me, don't you? we're lovers then, and lovers are mates. mates have to claim each other, now do it”

your brow twitches annoyed. “you're acting oddly demanding huh” you shrug him off your lap and before he can complain you force him on all fours.

“okay then. just don't be loud” he nods frantically and allows you to bring down his pants along with his underwear, revealing his pretty ass to you. you grab both of his cheeks and spread them open, showing you his twitching hole. you tease your fingers around his rim making him whimper and shiver.

“i've barely done anything” you chuckle and collect saliva in your mouth then spit it on his hole, using your fingers to smear it around, and use those same fingers to put them in his mouth, he happily drools all over them, bitting them lightly too.

now with some improvised lube, you slowly start pushing a finger inside him, but he has other things in mind with the way he tries to push back on it. “tora stop, it's going to hurt” “doesn't matter! just use all of your fingers” he says with a high pitched voice, his tail wrappes around your wrist and lightly pulls on it. “do you want me to rip you open or something? don't answer that” you sigh and trust your finger faster.

you hear him mumble a quiet 'i do' but ignore him and keep your pace just a little faster. eventually, you have four fingers deep inside him and he's desperately trying to fuck himself back on them, but your hand on his hip isn't allowing him to.

“[name]! f-fuck me, please! need it, your fingers!” he moans when you slightly twist them inside him. “i told you to be quiet damn” he whimpers and tries to muffle his little noises with his hand.

you take your hand off his hip, allowing him to grind and push back on your fingers, and bring that hand towards his long soft fair, then tug on it making him squeak and arch his back deeply. you hover over him until you're looking down directly to his eyes that stare up, big and shiny.

“open” you don't need to say it twice for him to open his mouth, tongue lolling out and expectant for what you're about to do. you open your mouth and slowly a big glob of spit drips down your tongue toward his own, and obediently he swallows without you needing to command it.

“good boy” your praise was enough to have his eyes crossing and cock squirting cum, making a pool under him. you're kinda surprised by how easily he came, but that just makes him even more adorable.

you grab him and sit him on your lap, caressing his ears and listening to his purrs while he rests his head on your shoulder.

“i love you” he says sleepily. “i love you too, tora” he blushes and smiles feeling giddy and butterflies all over his tummy. he breathes your scent deeply and as he falls asleep he promises to himself to never let you go.

#★ queued.

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donquxiotes · 2 years

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# collaboration post ¡! @donquxiotes

tiger hybrid + kazutora <3

you had recently graduated as a veterinarian, after so many years of studying your ass off, now you can finally do what you love—helping animals, specially hybrids.

you sigh. this is not going to be easy, you can feel it already.

“calm down, kazutora. i would never do that, okay? come on, breath” he's sobbing pitifully, tears falling from his wide eyes non-stop. he isn't anywhere near to calming down.

“do you promise?” his shy muffled voice makes you smile. “yes, i promise” you kiss his hair which causes him to start purring, and your heart involuntarily melts at the sound.

how stupid of you to fall right where he wanted you to.

it's been a few weeks since that encounter with kazutora, and his attitude changed a lot since then. the thing is you don't know if it's a bad or a good thing.

“of course it's a good thing, what am i thinking” you scold yourself with a mumble. “at least he's not scared of his own shadow now”

“makes sense but-” a loud bang that came from kazutora's room interrupted them, making you both sweat. “i think you should go” you nod and move quickly towards his room.

your brow twitches annoyed. “you're acting oddly demanding huh” you shrug him off your lap and before he can complain you force him on all fours.

you grab him and sit him on your lap, caressing his ears and listening to his purrs while he rests his head on your shoulder.

#sleepinghybrids #holy shit #bookmarked!#reblog! kazutora hanemiya.

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donquxiotes · 2 years

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SUBBY DRABBLES - KISAKI TETTA, CHIFUYU MATSUNO, INUI SEISHU, IZANA KUROKAWA

warnings: humping. pegging. masturbation. vaginal sex for izana. nudes.

this is dedicated to @kobeani , @lucynnamonroll , @arpeggaze , and @mommysano !! thank you guys for making me laugh everyday😭

kisaki tetta:

kisaki wasn't used to this. wasn't used to the feeling of being loved like this. your hands gripping his hips, moving him back and forth on his pillow. head dipping low, trying to hide his flustered face in his pillow. the way kisaki hugs it close to him, pretending it was you, fucking his little cock against the softness of the body-sized pillow. your hold on his body kept him from stopping, helping him overcome his orgasm.

"you're going so slow, pick up the pace, pretty boy," you whispered in his ear, watching the man adjust himself on his pillow, shoving his cock inside the pillowcase. it felt so snug around him, he couldn't help but whimper.

"can't..can't, c-can't..! want you to be closer..need you to be as close as p-possible!" muffled moans leave his lips, feeling your hands move up to grope his chest. he remembers the days he had fucked his pillow alone, thinking about you, fantasizing about you, obsessing over you. kisaki had told you his dirty secret last night, and instead of just teasing him about it, you wanted to bring the idea of it to life before your eyes.

but you couldn't just keep your hands to yourself while watching your handsome husband grind against the new pillow he bought for this event. no, you had to make kisaki cry tears from being so close, yet so far away from you during this. watch his tongue drag down his bottom lip, watch the pillow stain with his precum, his cheeks getting all pink.

scooting him up on the pillow, you plopped yourself down, behind him, rubbing yourself against both the pillow, and kisaki. "tell me what you were thinking about, baby," you groaned, hugging him close to you. it took kisaki a while to speak, nothing but shaky moans leaving his lips.

"w-wanted you to hold me..aaah—fuck me as if i was the only person left in your life..! whore me out to everyone! wanted to be your s-special whore...!" fucking deep into the pillow, you rocked your hips at the same rhythm of his. pulling at his chin, your lips smashing into his, kisaki's heart couldn't calm down.

"love you, tetta, dump all your cum in this pillow, make me proud, princess," nodding his head, his never ending thrusts came to a halt as he spilt his seed all inside the warmth of the body pillow. panting, head tossed back, lidded eyes watched as you hopped off, and crawled towards his thighs. "good boy. now how 'bout i eat you out?"

shyly nodding, kisaki held your shoulders. "as long as you stay close to me forever."

chifuyu matsuno:

chifuyu had went over his mother's house, telling you he was looking for a few things there that he left, years ago. now, knowing the chifuyu from the past, he wasn't the brightest. he still isn't to be fair, but he got better.

chifuyu had been sending you pictures, texting you how things in his old room brought back memories. finding framed pictures of the two of you under his bed. then something really caught the blonde's eye. a big, brown box in the corner of his room. he knew what it was.

'found my gang uniform!! there's a few shirts i can bring home :)' reading his text, you laughed, you had poked fun at it awhile back.

'oh yeah? bet it'd look really nice on you, send pics' now, your message wasn't supposed to come off the way chifuyu thought it did. you wanted pics?

you noticed that he saw your text, yet hasn't replied for a good fifteen minutes. your notifications going off, letting you know your boyfriend finally responded, oh, with a picture too.

eyes widening as you clicked the message, you didn't know what to say. the picture was chifuyu, his old, thousand winters t-shirt being held up to his nipples. his other hand in his dick, while the other held up his phone to his mirror.

'come home. now.' was all you sent, chifuyu didn't waste any time.

♡

everything was a blank until now, honestly. chifuyu riding your strapon, showing off his stupid gang shirt, seriously who comes up with that shit?

the shirt was tight on him, hugged his body perfectly. pretty boy couldn't stop bouncing on your dick, loving the way it rubbed inside of him. "look so dumb in that shirt, 'fuyu, can't help but think it's real adorable on you," chifuyu didn't know whether to take that as a compliment, or not, but the way your hands wouldn't let go of him from under his shirt.

"mm-mhm! f-feels good! t-thank you— aah—for f-fucking me in this!" he moaned, dick squirting for the nth time now. felt so dumb, but he was in his glory, finally this shirt got the appreciation it deserved.

"let's send this to takemichi when we're done, show him that this shirt isn't all that ugly," you chuckle, kissing down chifuyu's soft belly.

nodding stupidly, chifuyu loved that plan. he couldn't wait to brag about this.

inui seishu:

inui was your beautiful boy, he was quiet most of the time, but he loved talking to you. loved when you played with his hair, caressed his scar, praised him. it finally felt like someone loved him for him, no weird extensions to it at all. he was thankful for you, showed you his appreciation in different ways. made you breakfast in bed, helped you around the house, let you have your way with him in the bedroom..

yeah, inui loved all of it. he was comfortable around you. though, there was a problem tonight. you two had went to hangout with the others at a club, and you weren't giving him enough attention. you weren't obligated to, of course, but he couldn't help but get a little pouty. he tried to get your attention, but you couldn't hear him with the music blasting. yeah, inui was needy. he didn't speak it much, but as soon as you gave him the attention he deserved, he relied on you a lot.

and with people grinding on each other all around, inui was real needy. holding you by your hips, inui hugged you from behind, slightly rutting into you. now he had your full attention, good, or bad, he truly didn't know. "hey seishu, let's get out of here," gulping, inui nodded. he was nervous, yet excited, at least your eyes will be on him now.

♡

you had him set up, all cute on your bed. collar around his neck, the rest of his body bare, showing off for only you. his dick out, tip all leaky, anticipating for you to do something. "look at my pretty puppy, you needed my attention that bad?" you tease, crawling closer to him. whimpering, inui nodded, spreading his thighs apart himself. you loved when he was completely ready to give himself up to you.

"let me take good care of you, you're always so good to me," hands on his pale thighs, his emerald eyes watching your hand grab at his pretty dick. "want me to make you feel all better, sei?"

"y-yes..! pretty please.." you loved when he used his words, his voice was so delicate. hand around his dick, you began jerking him off, thumbing at his wet slit. "m-mmm! feels good..i feel good..!" inui couldn't stay silent anymore, no, it was impossible with the way your movements sped up, your other hand playing with his balls.

his moans filled the room, you were having so much fun with him. telling him you were going to ride him after when he cums all over your hand, milk his cock for all it's worth. he loved the idea, shooting his milky, thick cum all over your fingers. seishu couldn't help but cry, he felt so loved, felt so good in your hands.

you'll make sure to kiss all his tears away, you'll never leave his side.

izana kurokawa:

izana was obsessed with you. that was obvious, everyone can tell. izana put you above everything, treated you as if you were his god. tenjiku was sometimes scared to even talk to you, not wanting their heads to be chopped off by their leader. but, you were obsessed with him also. wanting the best for izana during everything, taking care of him when he needed it, comforting him when he got into one of his moods.

izana wasn't afraid to show affection either, especially when it was most needed. like now, when ran couldn't take his eyes off of you. izana's head resting on your chest, kissing your hand repeatedly. "you know i love you, right?" he'd ask, as if you didn't know already. fingers combing through his bleached hair, you sighed.

"are you that jealous, iza? of course i know you love me, i'd never doubt it," you chuckle, eyes glaring at ran to move along now. he was getting annoying at this point. "i love you too, will always love you," izana tilted his head up, orchid eyes staring holes through your skull.

"show me how much you love me then?" his smile was so shy, almost innocent too, but what he was implying was anything but that.

♡

the way you felt around his pretty dick. felt like heaven, izana was sure he was in heaven right now. his fragile moans escaping his glossed lips, begging you to go faster. he couldn't believe you were teasing him, how dare you make him melt like this?

you couldn't help it, it was so fun to watch izana break like this. turning him into a needy baby, sucking at your nipples just because they soothe him down. "you look so gorgeous, izana, so lucky i have you in my life," you groaned, feeling his pubes poke at your clit.

shaking his head, izana couldn't hold back his whimpers. "l-lucky, 'm the— aah—lucky o-one" you kissed down his neck, had his eyes roll back, gripping your body as tight as possible.

"fuck, love you, won't ever stop loving you, iza," pushing his head into your chest further, his lips wouldn't let go of your bud, like a fucking baby. you heard him sniffle, like it was the first time you had ever said that, it wasn't, it had to be the millionth. the feeling of his cum squirting inside of you felt too good.

"thank you—agh! won't ever stop l-loving you either," izana was beyond grateful to have you in his life, it truly did cure his agony, and pain he had throughout his life. he loved you.

#❤️‍🔥. . .kale’s reblogs.#reblog! kisaki tetta.#reblog! inui seishu.#reblog! chifuyu matsuno.#reblog! izana kurokawa.#mayb i just died and got revived #then died again #MY BABYBOY #MY PRINCESS 🥺#MY PUMPKIN #IM !!!!!#THANK U THANK U THANK U FLAKES 😫😫😫#I LOVE IT SM

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donquxiotes · 2 years

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I would like to contribute to the Angry fanart with this

#prettiest #reblog! souya kawata.

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donquxiotes · 2 years

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me when the server use the wrong channel for the wrong topics….

#🗯#no bc #there’s no reason why there’s fire in my chest……#i don’t mean to b a little shit #but 😒😒😒

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donquxiotes · 2 years

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PLEASE THOROUGHLY READ!

I think it’s time we had a talk…

For anyone who doesn’t know me, hi, I’m Snake, a bi demisexual- a being/amalgamation of energies that feels most comfortable identifying as a woman, which coincides with what I was assigned as at birth, leaving me to fall in the category of cisgender. But please understand something, I consider myself a cognizant entity (a human person) first, and treat my womanhood as a separate descriptor. In simpler terms, I don’t see myself as a female person (adjective & noun); I see myself as a person who also happens to be a woman (noun & noun). I hope this makes sense, because I apply this same way of thinking to others as well.

Moving on, I’m sure most of you reading this are aware of by now, I was involved in a disagreement with another user here in writing tumblr that resulted in a PSA-type post being made about me using screenshots from said disagreement to paint me as a gaslighter/manipulator. As much as I would like to not further this discourse any longer, I don’t take kindly to having the content of my character publicly persecuted over misdirection and twisting (or not understanding) my original meaning. And I also don’t like letting bad/problematic behavior slide. So, I’m here to set some things straight. Please bear with me.

Firstly, I want to go over some key terms so we can all keep up a bit better.

Objectification- to consider a person as an object, a mere instrument for the attainment of a personal goal, resulting in the denial of their human identity

Sexualization (sexual objectification)- establishing the value of another based on their physical appearance/attributes, occurring when someone is reduced to their body parts and/or sexual functioning

Pulled almost verbatim from this article, that discussed, at length, the issue of trans fetishization. And, in regards to trans fetishization, says this:

For example, when fetishism is utilized in reference to an attraction toward transgender individuals, fetishism refers specifically to the sexual investment in transness (i.e., body, identity, status, etc.) as an overvalued sexual object, rather than the holistic individual (Evangelista, 2018).

Why is this important? Because this quote highlights something very important: the connection between fetishization and a specific type of attraction. But I think I’m getting ahead of myself a little, so let’s start at the beginning.

Prior to this week, there was a notable surge in content containing men with vaginas, and using, what some would consider, improper referential terms while doing so. I myself participated, reblogging two posts (I think, but I can’t seem to find one of them now. tumblr’s tagging system sucks), and creating one myself. At the time, I will readily admit, I was not taking the terminology I was using (pussyboy) into consideration- although that post has since been updated to more accurately and respectful refer to the character’s identity in that specific instance.

Anyway, back to how things happened. Days after creating my post, I received a message from this former mutual, who we will refer to as XM (ex moot), just to keep things clear and concise (saying ‘this person’ a million times gets old). So, XM dms me, asking for clarification about my post and my intentions with it, I explain myself, things escalate with no resolution in sight, I decide the back-and-forth isn’t worth it, and decide to block them. The following morning, I wake up, and there this PSA post is, outlining what “gaslighting and manipulation” looks like when used as a tool to oppress minorities, specifically, trans people, in this case.

There’s going to be a lot of screenshots in here of various posts, the initial exchange, and other relevant content, so I apologize in advance for the length. I’m going to try and keep it as compact as possible, there’s just a lot.

Ok, to give everyone proper context in regards to myself, as I said, I’m a bi demisexual, cisgender woman.

What does bisexual (bi) mean? Or what is it?

Bisexuality refers to a person whose primary sexual and affectional orientation is towards people of the same and other genders, towards people regardless of their gender, or to two or more genders.

This is the definition I feel comfortable adopting, and I fall into the category of bi who can experience attraction towards people regardless of their gender identity. And while some people use bisexuality and pansexuality interchangeably in that case, I simply prefer to identify as bi.

But then, what is demisexual, and can you be both?

Demisexual refers to a person who only feels sexually attracted to someone when they have an emotional bond with that person. People who identify as demisexual can be gay, straight, bi, pan, and may have any gender identity. The prefix “demi” means half- which can refer to being halfway between sexual and a sexual.

So, the answer is yes. Although, I don’t personally adopt the stance that I stand halfway between being sexual and asexual.

To summarize, in a romantic/sexual sense, I experience attraction towards all people regardless of gender identity, but an emotional connection must be made in order for me to feel sexual attraction to someone.

Wonderful, I’m glad we established that. So, on to the messages- and their post containing my messages and some things on XM’s end that they said in that exchange. I will also be throwing up the massages in their entirety for you to get the full scope. My messages are scribbled in blue, theirs are in purple.

What are we looking at here exactly? The first image is XM expressing their concern, the second my response to said concern. There’s another message below of mine that, unfortunately, I do not have (I deleted my thread immediately after blocking XM), but in it I assured them that, while I might not know everything there is to know, I’m not uneducated on the subject, or unfamiliar with this argument really, although I didn’t bring that up. I’ve been on tumblr a long time. 10+ years and liked to use it to keep myself apace of social issues- trans fetishization isn’t something I’ve never heard of before, but, at this point, I wasn’t worried about being super delicate and slipped up in wording how I experience my attraction. Saying ‘I like men and I like pussy’ is really a gross bastardization of my own orientation, and would have been more accurately put as stated above. But I digress.

On the right, we have a screenshot taken from their subsequent post. What I want to address is: is this actually what they referred to as “the initial stage of gaslighting.” Let’s look to the definition XM themselves endorsed.

“In the vernacular, the phrase “to gaslight” refers to the act of undermining another person’s reality by denying facts, the environment around them, or their feelings. Targets of gaslighting are manipulated into turning against their cognition, their emotions, and who they fundamentally are as people.” (Stern 2019)

So, by definition, was my explanation, although imperfect, gaslighting, even in its beginning forms? No, it wasn’t. It was me acknowledging their discomfort and concern while also adding my own two cents for us to discuss things openly. I don’t know how to break it to y’all, but people are absolutely allowed to have opinions or hold beliefs that might not align with your own, or to not fully understand a point you are making. To suggest otherwise, or make it look as such, is dangerous and wildly irresponsible, and to call this particular instance “subconscious gaslighting” is insidious. To greater understand the severity of that claim, here is an article which I encourage you to read, because it adds some much needed perspective in this whole situation.

Anyway, continuing on, in regards to the claims of “manipulation” the cited this message-

And, actually, I’m not going to continue speaking like I have no voice in this. My message on the left was nothing but straight facts and this whole things is honestly stupid to even be arguing about or to call into question, or frame as manipulation, because I am right. Gender experience and expression is extremely personal, not everyone under the genderqueer umbrella agrees on everything because it is such a broad grouping of people. And do you know what people love to do? Disagree. It’s human nature to not agree, and it is by no mean inherently bad. But literally, I’m just right. Whatever I said at that point wouldn’t have mattered to them. Anything short of agreeing entirely and promising not to do it again wouldn’t have been good enough. So, with nowhere left to go from there, I gave them the option we writers always present when our content disturbs another- block and filter. If they take issue with that responsibility being placed squarely on their shoulders, that’s entirely on them. I cannot and will not be held accountable for their comfort, especially when it directly infringes on my own rights as a writer and queer person.

I’m a hobby smut writer. On the Internet. Do I care about social issues and how they affect marginalized groups, yes, duh, obviously, I belong to a number of them. BUT! This is fiction. These characters aren’t real, and since when did we start holding writers fully accountable for fictional characters and fictional ethics? On top of that, my piece was about Ran, my main selfship. If you remember back to talks of fetishization and my sexuality, you find pretty quick that the argument for fetishization of said character falls flat entirely. And even then, it’s still fiction. Fiction characters, fictional relations, fictional setting. In my final message to XM, I said straight up if were solely about the term I had used to improperly label what was supposed to have been an intersex individual in my writing, that’s one thing. And to say a word (pussyboy/boypussy and/or girlcock/cockgirl) isn’t real is stupid. All words are real, but it’s not a word that every single genderqueer person finds flattering or acceptable, and that’s fine. Some do, some don’t. That’s not my place to decide for anyone, and I don’t mind dropping it from my vocabulary entirely.

HOWEVER. I’m not down to let ANYONE demonize my sexuality or the expression of it because of an improper use of words. Or let someone use it as a means to self-victimize. We’re not doing that, it’s unacceptable and toes the line of manufactured TERF rhetoric used to create division within the LGBTQIA+ community. To say, “you can experience your sexuality in real life, but not in writing,” as well as insinuating that I was expressing that attraction for “entertainment” is asinine at best, biphobic at worst, because, really, an attraction to trans people, trans individuals, in writing or otherwise, is not inherently evil. By definition, my piece of writing does not constitute fetishization. And to automatically assume fetishization (the overvaluing of trans experience and sexual functioning), or willfully ignore the context of the individual creating the content (or treat it as though it is invalid regardless), only serves to further self-victimization and self-alienation. And what does that coincide with? Trans-Exclusionary Radical Feminism. It literally plays right into their hands, you’re just saying it backwards. You’re doing their job for them. Stay here where you’re safe and protected uwu arm yourself with knowledge of the scary, scary outside world and the people you might encounter who would gasp think differently from you! Because of course you’re right, just like me, and no one can tell you otherwise either! Look, see?

You sound goofy.

Am I claiming that this is what XM was going for? No, absolutely not. I don’t think by any means that this is what they intended to imply. But this is what TERFs do- they take issues, change the wording a little to the point where is entirely changes the issue at hand as well, but in a frame of view that still aligns enough with the core message to go unnoticed. If this were the case, I wouldn’t blame them for falling for it. They are very convincing and convert sometimes. It wouldn’t be the first time, and it won’t be the last. But, as they chose to back their argument up by publicly posting everything, it genuine concerns me that they actually hold those beliefs to be true, and are also endorsing them to other scared and impressionable trans people who just want a place to belong.

And, while we’re here, if their goal was to create a safe and open space for the sake of trans people, why use fear-mongering tactics to sway opinions and garner favor/support?

Why were they encouraging self-victimization while simultaneously threatening to expose anyone for agreeing with me? Why did they create a ‘them vs. us’ scenario for people to rally behind on top of pushing the narrative that anyone here is in danger of me and my following? For reference, theirs is x5-6 times what mine is and they already irresponsibly used their platform. Who here is really more likely to come after anyone? Because if we’re looking at the facts, it’s not me. I’m not saying I shouldn’t be careful with my words despite my smaller following, but if they wanted to talk about speaking and creating responsibly, they cannot hold themselves exempt from that expectation. That’s called hypocrisy.

Do I think they were entirely right? No. Was I entirely right? No. But to take these issues, which we have both equally recognized the nuance of, in ways both similar and not, and turn it into a black and white issue while not even staying true to your original message? They can’t even for sure say that I’m a transphobe, despite undermining my credibility by saying I wouldn’t be able to “think rationally or logically.” I feel like that’s something someone would have no problem making a judgment call on if this is how they truly felt about me.

But they couldn’t, because I’m not a transphobe, nor was I ever really being transphobic. At worst, my word choice was unintentionally trans-exclusionary. So, why was painting me inaccurately as a gaslighter a good idea to them in the first place? If I made them question something simply with the act of disagreeing, maybe they should actually question it. Maybe some self-reflection is in order. Maybe think to understand why what I said was so upsetting rather than writing it off as gaslighting.

Which brings me to another point: Defensiveness is not evil. Everyone has things they wish to protect. In this case it was me feeling protective myself, and them feeling protective over their community. Neither of these instances are evil, or should be treated as such. Or one prioritized over the other. I truly do not fault them for wanting what is best for their community, and for someone like XM, whose race and gender identity are intrinsically tied, I’m sure some things come a lot more personal than others. And, again, because it bears repeating, if you’re looking at my recognition of that fact about them in terms of gaslighting, whether conscious, subconscious, or whatever, maybe stop assuming the worst of everyone around you. Maybe realize that I was truly trying to empathize with their situation and show a level of understanding. Maybe understand that the phrase ‘I see the validity of your points, and I understand where you are coming from, but I simply cannot agree with you’ should be allowed to exist and be enough.

Tldr: Think before you speak. Not everyone is out to get you. Treat people with the respect and humanity they deserve and block tf out of people who you feel don’t do that for you in return. That’s all.✌🏻

#‼️‼️‼️#well said snake ❤️#tw.discourse #tw.gaslighting #tw.manipulation

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