Every night at eleven I have to choose between enjoying the sweet embrace of slumber or staying up late to do something enriching and fun that I wouldn’t otherwise have the opportunity to do. And every night at eleven I take the secret third option of “doing nothing on my phone until one in the morning.”
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kitten i'll be honest daddy isn't sure he's cut out for full time employment
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you know how it is
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I had to mentally send myself a reaction image the other day. I ran up the stairs on all fours, said to myself “i’m such a locationpilled scampercel” and then perfectly envisioned this image
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wish i could call in bitchy to work
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so fucking evil that i don’t have the jagged pointy cartoon teeth that fit together like triangles. i deserve them
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Dear professor this assignment did not nourish my fundamentally curious soul so i did not do it No penalty full 100 points please Goodbye!
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the amount of time i spend thinking about them acting like horned up teens and making each other laugh in between warmongering death work time is honestly embarrassing. please put me out of my misery.
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god knew not to give me a dick because I would be getting hard every time I eat a cream cheese bagel
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Hey it's about your boyfriend. Yeah sorry, we sent him to the Shadow Realm. Just in the dub, though. In the sub he's dead.
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they should invent a job that doesn't affect your schedule or energy level that you don't have to go to if you don't want but you still get paid
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SHUT THE FUCK UP AND LOOK AT MY KITTEN IN MY SLIPPY
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as always,
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