fmdjaein

[fmdjaein]

fmdduri​:

it was probably always a bit odd, with the way duri always got really excited when it comes to music. it was probably one of the things that made him the most excited and most enthusiastic. even getting to the point where he’s thinking out loud, instead of just leaving them in his odd; maybe that was a bit weird. it didn’t matter what music it was, somehow duri was enthusiastic about it. guess he really was in the right path, huh?

though, duri wonders if he should go with something preppy in the writing, or try something different… maybe something more challenging and fitting for ultraviolet, while also making it different? then again, he wasn’t sure if the “different” song would actually be accepted if it was too different. he nodded his head, a small chuckle leaving his lips, “maybe it would be too different,” he said. he nodded his head once more, “ah, yeah! like mean girls and clueless!” he said, his mind thinking once more of something high-teenish, that would be interesting. 

“ah, there’s no pressure what so ever! this is stuff i always enjoy doing and i always like finding something to write,” he said, his smile growing a bit more. “thank you!” he said, giving a bow of thanks.

despite the successful numbers and records ultraviolet got with every comeback, they weren’t immune to criticism. very valid criticism as well, if you asked her. especially when they had to do with the type of music they released. could their songs be called different songs when they all sounded the same? same structure, same beat, similar melodies and so on. she was sick and tired of it so there was no doubt that the listeners were as well.

“too different is nice. it’d be fun if ultraviolet went down the candy route as well, don’t you think so? the high-teen thing where we’re dressed in checkered tennis skirts and falling for a boy or whatever those cliche music videos display.” truthfully, she doesn’t think she’d be a fan of anything, but even that sounds more fun than pretending to scowl at the camera for every one of their music videos. it’s not like jaein was that type of person anyway.

“yeah, just keep it us in your mind? please?” with that, she chuckles because she thinks she’s starting to sound desperate. “who knows? maybe we’ll totally rock whatever you decide to give us and surprise everybody.”

#fmdduri #( ✦ . ˚ — threads. ) #[ wow i had thought i replied to this lol ]

[fmdjaein]

gyujeongfmd​:

there’s little shit leaving him in restraint. call it a test of time as his patience dwindles down, or maybe, just call it the fact he can barely hold his own when he’s forced into situational formalities.

formality one: how he marches in, nodding his head to some idol he’s seen in passing once or twice. doesn’t bother to say hi, nor does he respond to their greetings. formality two: the cameras in the area capturing his off-set look. he doesn’t bother to pose, just turns a cold shoulder — ‘cause in the end, maybe, it’s just better to be staring into a wall instead.

time passes slowly. slower than he imagines, and by the time he’s half-way through rehearsing another lousy excuse to get the fuck away from this event, he’s held at a standstill. a conversation propped up, and he tips his gaze over. jaein. he remembers her name, knows her face well enough too. it’s an ominous sign, he presumes, that timing’s everything — he’s probably not meant to slip out so easily quite yet.

“call me a company loyalist or some shit.” his words mumble out, sarcastic and lazy. “i’m always at these bullshit events. forced to keep up with images, or at least, that’s what my manager keeps saying when i ask why.” 

as much as she shouldn’t be, jaein’s not lying when she says she’s counting down the days until ultraviolet’s contract is up. she knows fans will be devastated when she doesn’t renew her contract, but she knows for a fact that she can’t do this any longer than the time she absolutely has to. 

days are like her shower cycle: rinse and repeat, and while she’s never had a problem with repetitive days, it becomes absolutely exhausting when the gaps have to be filled with fake laughs and comments. oddly enough, she’s a little relieved to see gyujeong because now she doesn’t have to fake anything. if there’s anybody out there who hates this event more than she does, it’s probably him.

“everything about this job is about the image.” a fact that he already knows, of course, but she reminds him once more. she doesn’t disagree with anything he says though. if anything, he says everything that she’d like to say. “have you ever tried running off and going into hiding? i wonder if it works. i know some artists in the past would do so but that was before all the phones and stuff. now, even if i run off to like pohang, someone there is gonna snap a picture of me and upload it on instagram or twitter in a matter of a few minutes.”

#gyujeongfmd #( ✦ . ˚ — threads. ) #famedbccopening

[fmdjaein]

💖🦢

#( ✦ . ˚ — visual. ) #[ hello folks my muse for jaein is holding on by a thread ] #[ but then i see yves and go :/ maybe i should keep her ] #[ anyway i'm gonna try to get to replies!!! ]

[fmdjaein]

any time jaein is made to attend these events, all she can think about is how much better she could be spending her time. the thoughts are endless, and she wants to be here even less after the whole fiasco with gold star a few weeks ago. it’s ridiculous how they have yet to speak up about what happened, and the girls were made to take the fall. not that she trusted the company to begin with—she was never that naive—but it was annoying just how purposely incompetent they were being.

nevertheless, she couldn’t stand around with a scowl on her face, but she thinks the forced smile on her face looks even more fake than usual. if anybody falls for it, maybe she should ask for an acting career. she seems to be great at faking it. 

letting out a sigh, she tried to look for a place with less people. some of the higher ups had commented on ultraviolet’s latest activities, and she could just sense the sarcasm about the talk on their success as if they don’t deserve it. they can take it. not like jaein asked for it in the first place. when she walks off to a secluded place, she ends up bumping into a familiar face whom she’s not at all surprised to find anymore at company-held events. 

“at this point, i’d be surprised not to run into you at these things.”

@gyujeongfmd

#gyujeongfmd #( ✦ . ˚ — threads. ) #famedbccopening #[ sorry for the wait! lmk if you'd like anything changed! ]

[fmdjaein]

summary: what jaein hates more than anything is getting criticized for something that was never her fault in the first place date: october 9th word count: 411 words ooc note: n/a

they manage to make it out of the event without getting tomatoes thrown onto their face, but jaein could very well hear what some of the reporters were saying about them. she’s certain that they were deliberately loud with their comments. they wanted to make sure the group heard all the nasty things they had to say. 

now they’re seated back in their van and on their way back to their dorm. she tries not to, but she can’t help but go online to see what exactly is being said about them and whether gold star has issued a statement or not. usually she’s not too concerned about what gold star has to say, but none of this was any of the girl’s faults. there was a clear reason they were late where all the blame was on the company, not them. 

what jaein hated more than anything else was being criticized for something that was never her fault in the first place. she steals a glance in the rearview mirror in which she meets eyes with her manager. there’s a plead in them that read don’t go online but she doesn’t listen. if people are saying stuff about the girls, she’d find out eventually anyway. might as well take the fall herself rather than hearing it from someone else.

as expected, people aren’t very nice with what they have to say.

there’s all sorts of things: people calling them gold star’s princesses, a headline that claims they’ve caught the celebrity disease because of their success, and just some straight up nasty ones that put down the girls. 

none of it is surprising, and it wouldn’t be the first time jaein’s read negative things about her online. with the fame came a lot of people who wanted to see their downfall as well. however, she doesn’t think anything’s been as bad as this is playing out to be. she’s never once been late on purpose for anything, and she doesn’t want to be held responsible for something that wasn’t even on her.

“the company doesn’t want you addressing what just happened.” their manager breaks the silence, and all jaein can do is scoff. she wants to ask if that means gold star will talk up about it, but from the look on his face, she assumes that means no. 

she lets out another groan before throwing her phone onto the seat besides her. just what a great start to the month.

#famedschedule #( ✦ . ˚ — self para. )

[fmdjaein]

fmdjoosung​:

“i’ve heard great things, so i can’t wait to see how nice your hair looks after.” 

sung looked down at her hair, as if it had suddenly turned neon green, and huffed out small bits of laughter. “um, yeah, i don’t think so. unless you know something i don’t,” she tilted her head, raised her brow, teased, then chuckled more wholeheartedly. “last i heard, the plan was to keep my hair dark for this whole comeback. since my concept this release was more pure, i think it’s playing into the title track’s concept. at least, that’s my guess anyway. there’s so many moving parts in every release that it’s hard to know what the actual intention behind something is, you know?” after rambling for so long, she wasn’t sure if anything she’d just said made sense, so she took the breath to transition back to the actual question jaein asked. “i’m just here for a trim, too. i try to come by monthly, but it’s not always so easy with schedules and everything.”

jaein could never understand why dark brown or black hair stood for innocence while something more wild stood for... well, wild. with ultraviolet’s concept leaning more towards the latter, she’s surprised gold star hasn’t thrown a rainbow of colors onto her hair, but she knows it’s because she’s supposed to put on that innocent look as well. that’s all that goes through her mind as she listens to joosung talk about candy’s concept, something that she knows is drastically different from her own group’s.

“yeah, i get that. most of the times, i try to understand but then i just end up nodding and pretending like i get everything.” perhaps not the smartest move as the leader, but it’s not like she has any decision making power anyway. at the end of the day, she’s just another pawn in the game. “have you ever had like a bob cut before? i can’t recall if you had. anyway, i think that’d be interesting too, but i doubt it’d ever happen in my career. unless ultraviolet decides to go disco or something.”

#fmdjoosung #( ✦ . ˚ — threads. )

[fmdjaein]

fmdduri​:

there’s a nod of the head at the words spoken. “oh yeah, that’s true!” he says. now his mind is wondering what he could potentially write in his own style, but he was conjuring up ideas already. he knows that something new would be good, especially because he knows that ultraviolet would easily be able to pull it off, wouldn’t they? “yeah, i get that! i like that titan has a wider variety in the concepts that we do. i think ultraviolet could easily pull out doing something different!” 

he feels like there’s a lot that he’d be able to write to give them something different. maybe something with a more upbeat thing in mind… or maybe something a little more on the jazzy side? or maybe it could be something that would work for a pretty or even mystical type of concept. then again, would gold star accept those things? either way, he thinks he might try it, just to see what happens. 

“preppier? i could do preppy!” he said, giggling softly. “maybe something like… asap? but, with a lot more preppier touch… but also, different,” he says, more so thinking out loud, if anything.  “i think maybe i’ll write something, talk to bc entertainment, and see if i can submit something for ultraviolet’s next comeback, i think that would be a lot of fun,” he said, nodding his head excitingly. 

for a moment, she just stares at duri and the enthusiasm he’s showing. he seems more excited about the idea of ultraviolet possibly doing something different than she does. though, that’s not that hard of a task with how unenthusiastic she is about the music she performs. even with this conversation about wanting something new, she doesn’t think she’ll be all that excited when she eventually does get something different. 

oh, she definitely knows he can do preppy. however, she’s not sure if she can imagine herself performing asap. it sounds like something her fans would like, but herself? she’s not too sure. “ultraviolet performing something like asap would be something new, alright.” with that, she lets out a chuckle. “i think our company likes the whole sort of rich sounding music so maybe you can imagine a cliche high school setting. you know, like what you see in those american dramas and movies.” 

high-teen seemed to be a trend these days, but not a trend that ultraviolet would ever follow. nevertheless, it sounds like it can be fun. “i wasn’t trying to pressure you into anything. i just think you write some nice girl group songs.”

#fmdduri #( ✦ . ˚ — threads. )

[fmdjaein]

miraefmd​:

“oh, i doubt that’s it.” she withholds that she might be the last person to speak on gold star’s usual practices when selene remains the sole act under the company not to tour the ‘world’, in the most basic marketing sense, even once yet. “i brought my trainer with me when we toured in japan a few years back, but we were there for a week, so i’m not familiar with the protocol for anything longer than that. if you ask me, they should be happy to front the bill when we have to stay in shape to give a good performance, but i’m talent, not the finance department.”

“if anyone’s allowed, i’d bet it’s catalyst.” between their album sales and the fanservice shirtless stages she’s sure they must do, they seem like the place gold star media would re-direct the funds for tour-along personal trainers if there were any at all. “but if they get that, ultraviolet should, too, so if you hear anything, i’d make some noise about it. let me know and i’ll join in.”

“do you usually do yoga at night? i personally prefer to do it in the morning or around lunch time. you have more control over getting it done that way, in case something at work runs long at night.” mirae takes a seat on a nearby mat and takes to stretching out her legs as she continues to talk. “is there staff around local to the area when you’re touring? they might have local gym memberships they can bring you along on.” she leans to stretch her body over her left leg but turns her head to keep her eyes on jaein. “or put a gym pass on your rider.” presented with a problem, mirae is determined to solve it for her junior now.

there were a lot of things about the logistics behind traveling and concert tours that jaein doesn’t think she’ll ever understand. sure, she likes to complain out loud like this, but she doubts she’d be able to do the planning of executing. company executives exist for a reason and even if she did want a change, she’s not sure who she would have to go to. frankly, she doubts anything will change anyway.

she can’t help the snort that comes out of her when mirae mentions catalyst. “oh, definitely. surely they get to make more requests than we do.” again, it was a haste generalization, but she wouldn’t be surprised. boy groups brought in numbers that girl groups sometimes couldn’t, and there was no doubt that catalyst’s fanbase was continuing to grow. “maybe i’ll make some picket signs and protest in front of ceo bang’s office.” she would never, but it’s a funny situation to imagine.

“i do some light stretching in the morning, but yeah, most of my like intense yoga or working out happens at night. or whenever i find the time. like if i know i have a schedule at night, i’ll try to squeeze it in during the day.” she thinks she should stick to a more steady schedule, but her work doesn’t always allow that. not with the lack of freedom ultraviolet has. “see, i just don’t know. i guess i haven’t tried to figure it out either. they lock me in a hotel and i just stay there.”

#miraefmd #( ✦ . ˚ — threads. )

[fmdjaein]

fmdduri​:

it’s an interesting thought, truth be told. did he have any thoughts on writing ultraviolet’s music any time soon? truth be told, he thinks he does. 

it would be a really nice challenge to try something different, since he doesn’t think he’s really ever written anything quite like the type of music that ultraviolet puts out. sure, duri has written a bunch of different titan songs, but of course, that’s the realm of titan, so it was different. even more different was penning the words for gee, asap, and chimatbaram. plus now, he mainly writes ballads when it comes to his own solo career. 

nonetheless, he nods his head a bit excitingly.  “i do, i think! i think it would be a really nice challenge to write something for ultraviolet because i think ultraviolet has music that’s really different from what i’ve written before,” he said, his head nodding excitingly once more. he wondered if he’d be able to pull it off and write an ultraviolet song? he was sure he could and his mind seemingly filled with different ideas that he could do. 

he nodded his head, “i think it’s possible! it could be like the concept that as if it’s your last has!” he says. “maybe i should focus on trying to write for a concept like that… or maybe that would be too easy for me to do and i should go more challenging?” 

for a moment, she begins to wonder if she’s given duri any unnecessary pressure. it was an innocent question, but she wouldn’t be surprised if he took it the wrong way. however, before she can correct herself, he answers back with a tone of enthusiasm that helps bury down her worries. 

“well, you could always just write something that’s more your style and we can adjust to it.” that’s the real reason she asked. while it may not be up ultraviolet’s alley, she really doesn’t think it’d hurt for them to do something new. not when their fans will pretty much stream and buy anything they release. “it gets a little tiring performing the same girl crush songs, you know?” actually, she’s not sure if he does know considering that titan’s had a wider variety in concepts, but she hopes her subliminal message has gone through. 

she hums when he mentions as if it’s your last. not one of her favorite releases, but it’d be nice to return to that sound for a comeback. or two. or maybe even three. “honestly, i’d be up for whatever you throw at us. we could use a preppier sounding song, in my honest opinion.”

#fmdduri #( ✦ . ˚ — threads. )

[fmdjaein]

fmdjoosung​:

“oh! thank you! ultraviolet’s just released a song recently, too, right?” considering her usual level of knowledge, admitting this was a touch embarrassing, but she went full speed ahead nonetheless, “unfortunately with crowned, i ended up getting a little bit behind on releases from some people. i’m sure it’s great, though. i’ll be sure to look into it once i get home.”

sung sat herself down near jaein -though she might have to move whenever the any stylists came in, for now it’d be much more polite to not have to shout across the room at one another. her feet crossed at the ankles and her hands held onto the sides of the seat as she settled down into her spot. “so, um, are you here for a treatment? i’ve heard there’s a new hair treatment that’s very popular amongst idols lately.”

jaein’s uncertain if recently is accurate anymore but considering they were wrapping up the last parts of their promotion, but she simply nodded at joosung’s question. “yeah. it was kind of quick though.” the preparations, the promotions and just everything surrounding it seemed like a quick cash grab. she definitely wouldn’t be surprised if that was indeed the case. 

“uhm, i’m actually not sure. i think they want to trim off a bit of the dead hair on the bottom and yeah, maybe i’ll be getting that treatment you’re talking about.” how she keeps up with such things baffles jaein, but she won’t judge. maybe joosung was just really interested in hair treatments. “how about you? doing something crazy with your hair or something?” with that, she lets out a chuckle before grabbing a piece of her own hair, trying to imagine it in a wild color. 

#fmdjoosung #( ✦ . ˚ — threads. )

[fmdjaein]

miraefmd​:

“do i look like i don’t?”

her tone is playfully offended as she acts out looking down at herself and then checking the strength of her own bicep in an overexaggerated arm pose.

mirae wouldn’t go so far as to call herself a woman of routine — that seems to imply that she can’t take the spontaneous in stride — but she does quite enjoy the regularity she’s ironed out in her workout schedule. five days of cardio and two of strength training a week, consistent pilates, yoga, and pole classes. she’d always been active, but her idea of exercise had been much less regimented in her youth, so she appreciates the reliability now.

“gold star doesn’t splurge for your own travel-along personal trainers?” mirae wouldn’t know the protocol. selene has never been much of a touring group. they fly off to japan for a few days of concerts here and there or drop by busan for an encore to a seoul show, but world tours of the type ultraviolet engages in are a mystery to her. she tries not to let it nag at her that ultraviolet are getting to do things selene never got to, but there’s still a pinch of something in the back of her head.

“if they won’t do that, i’d get a personal trainer to set up a routine catered to limited space. hotel gyms are fine, but there’s a lot you can do without equipment in a hotel room. squats, crunches, lunges, planks. do you do any yoga? if you bring a mat and a block in your luggage, there should be room to keep up with that in a decent-sized hotel room.”

she can’t help but chuckle as she shakes her head because that’s not what she meant, but she could see why her awkward question may be interpreted like that. “i mean, no, you seem pretty fit, but that could happen in lots of ways. i know a lot of people who do pilates and yoga but don’t actually work out, you know.” her words start sounding like a bunch of excuses the more she talks so she shuts her mouth before giving another shake of her head.

“no. maybe it’s because we’re still rookies,” she replies with a shrug. truthfully, she doesn’t know how it goes with the other groups, but they haven’t had a personal trainer following them around on their tours. with the number of cities they’ve been visiting, that doesn’t surprise her. however, she is a little shocked to hear that it seems to be that way for selene. but senior groups are senior groups for a reason. 

jaein nods as she listens to mirae offering her all this advice. there’s a part of her that knows she probably won’t follow through on it much, but it’s still nice to know. have that little memo open in the back of her mind for the time she does decide to follow through. “yeah, i have a yoga mat. i use it more like a pillow these days, but maybe i should actually carry it around,” she replies with a chuckle. “i just can’t bother all the time after a three hour concert. maybe that’s a sign that i should be doing more, but-” she cuts herself off because she doesn’t have a better reason. “plus, i just like working out in gyms better. wish there was an overall better solution.”

#miraefmd #( ✦ . ˚ — threads. )

[fmdjaein]

“so you have any thoughts on writing ultraviolet’s music any time soon?” 

honestly, jaein doesn’t know how duri does it. actually, she doesn’t know how anybody does it. writing music? sounds like a whole lot of work that she’d never want to do. doesn’t help that people are overly critical about every release these days which means that most songwriters are more likely to receive criticism over praise.

however, she also knows that duri’s written some songs that sound completely different from the songs ultraviolet sing, and she thinks that maybe, just maybe, a change would be appreciated. for her, at least. she’s not entirely sure about their fans. they seem to latch onto anything they release. 

“like can you imagine me singing something like chimatbaram? i can’t, but i think it could be fun.” does she completely mean it? not really because, admittedly, she’s not a big fan of the song she just name dropped, but it is a fun situation to imagine.

@fmdduri

#fmdduri #( ✦ . ˚ — threads. ) #[ i thought he deserved someone other than suji this time!!! ]

[fmdjaein]

#( ✦ . ˚ — visual. ) #[ i am awfully aware that i still owe starters ] #[ but the chuseok hospital means i have so much work to catch up on ] #[ imma try my best this week asdflk i'm so sorry ]

[fmdjaein]

“so, do you work out often?” 

jaein’s not sure how she ended up at the company gym with mirae, but she’s here now. it’s not like she really needs extra help, she has a personal trainer for that, and she’s already spent lots of time working out on her own. that, and she does enjoy working out on her own, but she can’t control that when it comes to the company gym. available for everyone.

“i try to go to the gym at least 3 times a week, but that’s pretty much impossible when on tour so i’ve had to figure out a routine to do in the hotel rooms.” she wasn’t seeking advice, per se, but mirae’s got close to a decade more experience as an idol than her, thus she’s bound to have some sort of useful information because working out in hotel rooms was a pain, but she couldn’t risk going to the hotel gyms. not when she knows supposed fans book rooms in the same hotels as them.

with a sigh, she rolls out her ankles before giving the other a shrug. “i guess what i’m asking is, what would you do in such a situation? just use the hotel gym?”

@miraefmd

#miraefmd #( ✦ . ˚ — threads. ) #[ hopefully this works for you asdfkd ]

[fmdjaein]

she’s not sure why she’s even stuck at the salon when gold star won’t change her hair color. jaein’s been going back and forth between different shades of black and brown throughout her whole career, and while she doesn’t really want to bleach her hair, at least that’d give a reason as to why she’s been here for over an hour. 

she’s about ready to get out of there when someone walks into the semi-private area. her assumption is that it’ll be her makeup artist or hair stylist or whomever with good news that she can get out of here but instead, she’s met with an unexpected friendly face. looking up from her phone, she gives joosung a faint smile before looking back down at the screen, ready to message her manager. 

“congrats on your comeback,” she speaks up because with her past encounters with joosung, she’s aware that the candy member will spark up a conversation anyway. might as well get a head start on it. 

@fmdjoosung

#fmdjoosung #( ✦ . ˚ — threads. )

[fmdjaein]

summary: jaein thinks ultraviolet doesn’t deserve such a high ranking date: august 28th location: crowned final round recording word count: 463 words ooc note: n/a

as soon as the rankings start getting announced, jaein begins to pray that ultraviolet gets called already. she doesn’t think they’ve done anything outstanding throughout the whole program and while their fans like to claim that they owned each stage they did, jaein thinks that they brought in the bare minimum. there was nothing new about the performances they pulled off, especially in comparison to some of the other groups who went all out. 

she’s been saying this from the beginning, but ultraviolet didn’t need crowned. they could have used this time in a more useful way like, perhaps, giving the girls a needed vacation. it’s not like a win on crowned was going to mean much for their careers. all it would do is cause an uproar in their fandom because she knows how intense they can get. 

scanning the cameras that are on them, she puts on her professional leader jaein face and patiently waits for their name to be called. twelfth, eleventh, tenth, and so on. the ranking continues to get higher, but their name doesn’t get called. for a moment, she wonders if they’ve come last which is why they aren’t being called, but then she remembers that their fans have probably streamed their videos day and night. from the mere numbers that their fandom has, she doesn’t think coming in last would be realistic. 

“they’ve given their all despite their busy schedules and came out in fourth place.” 

with the hosts words, she looks around at the groups left over and assume that it’ll be ultraviolet. and she’s right. their name pops up on the screen behind them, and she quietly claps before giving a bow towards the audience that have been standing around for hours. 

for jaein, even fourth place sounds like too much. the girls are quickly dismissed from the stage because they still have four more placements to announce and the live broadcast is getting tight. she doesn’t forget to give a couple of waves towards the audience as she does. 

once they get back to their dressing room, their staff members congratulate them on their ranking. she gives everybody in the room a big bow because she knows that it was all of them that suffered more than the girls did. having to stick around during all those excruciating recordings and filming days. she doesn’t think they get paid enough for that.

their ambiguous ranking probably means that crowned will rarely get brought up when it comes to their future interviews. if anything, it’ll probably be brushed under the rug because they’ll have other achievements to talk about. letting out a sigh, she begins taking off her shoes and sinks into one of the seats.

boy is she glad that this is all over.

#famedcrownedaftershow #( ✦ . ˚ — self para. )

[fmdjaein]

fmdyerin​:

taken off-guard by jaein’s surprise attack, yerin shrieks; a burst of laughter echoing all around them as she tries to control the involuntary flail of her limbs, narrowly avoiding spilling her beer all over herself. “that’s a low blow, ryu jaein! you can’t just poke me knowing i’m ticklish.” her retaliating swat at jaein’s knee is gentle, holding no grudge against her friend’s sneakiness. she takes a moment to finish her beer, opting to free her hands of any potential mishaps should jaein attempt another poke in her direction.

“i’m a woman of many talents. it’s just a shame not everyone is special enough to witness me revealing my secret identity as doraemon. an air fryer is too basic. next time we meet up for a midnight escapade, i’ll have learned the art of magicking a cake from thin air.” setting the empty can aside, yerin shrugs and picks a snack at random, settling for a melona bar to satiate her craving. “it’s okay, both our managers can yell at me.” normally, yerin would be appalled at her spontaneous cheat day but there’s not enough room in her mind for the fear to override the need for a distraction. indulgence is only harmful in excess, after all. yerin as stubborn as she is lately, still knows her limits. “just for tonight, jaein, i promise. we can go back on a diet tomorrow.”

she’s quieter now that jaein’s worries have lit a torch on her own buried emotions. it’s not everyday that yerin sets out to break rules or sneaks out past curfew for a cheap thrill or because she’s reckless. after wearing a mask for so long, she finds it hard to come back to herself even after taking it off — the instinct to hide or shy away from scrutiny still lingers, no matter how hard she wants to open up; a byproduct of habitually holding people at arm’s length and erecting walls at the blink of an eye. yerin looks at jaein and wants to find salvation, but all she sees is confusion looking right back at her. “he didn’t say.” yerin takes a bite of the melona bar and laments the sting of the cold against her tongue for a moment before she speaks again. “just…he said he wanted to meet me.” see her. she’s stuck on the underlying meaning, the motive, of his surprise visit. she’s still reeling from the realness of him standing in front of her. same eyes, same arch of their brows, same feeling of stoic calm that’s become her trademark. “he asked me not to tell my mother.”

she can’t help but laugh at the way her friend shrieks, trying her best not to bring any more attention to them. they can’t risk that. however, she chuckles before shrugging and giving her friend a nonchalant response. “i’m your best friend, i think i should be allowed to do whatever i want.” with that, she gives her a ridiculously wide smile as if to tease the candy member.

it’s when she’s with yerin that she feels that she can just sit back and relax. talk about the most ridiculous things and scenarios. while none of her members pressure her into anything, it’s become a habit to put up a face when she’s with her group. that melts away when she’s with yerin. she ends up laughing upon imagining her friend just whipping cake out of the air, shaking her head at her silliness. “i’m just kidding, i won’t let my manager yell at you. if they get too mad, maybe we can make a run for it together.” jaein doesn’t think she has it in her to ever make a run, but it’s fun to imagine them doing so. “i’ll take your word for it,” she says before leaning over to take a peak at what else yerin might have in her extraordinary bag.

there’s a moment of silence as she patiently waits for her friend to explain. or not explain. she wouldn’t blame her if she decided to take that route either. what she’s learned is that family is a complicated topic for many, including herself, and no matter how secure yerin feels around her, she may still not want to share all the details. “hmm,” she says with a couple of slow nods. she’s never been the kind of person to offer encouraging words or statements of comfort, and she doesn’t think she knows enough to offer advice either. “what do you want to do? do you want to see him?” so she takes the road of asking yerin what she wants. hopefully having her talk about it will help sort out her thoughts.

#fmdyerin #( ✦ . ˚ — threads. ) #[ i am also returning to this like a month later so!! ]