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James... please stop posting about crabs... Please

damn looks like someone's feeling a bit... crabby

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I think the amogi (plural for amogus) are larval tellytubbies

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“Normalize x” “normalize y” I hope we denormalize everything. I hope we all become freaks. And I hope we all die

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there is no sweeter sound than the honk of a little clown

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if some seedy hollywood man accidentally killed ariana grande they could get literally anyone to be the body double. yes the double wouldnt have her racial range but they could just say she settled on her final form

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they should sell cigarettes with fun colors and flavors to kids so they stop vaping

#tw cigarettes #tw smoking

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Human: did you know that humans kinda taste like pork

Alien: . . .

Human: . . .

Alien: how exactly do you know this information?

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Humans are Space Orcs; Hangry

Just imagine a poor alien crew mate, unfamiliar with the concept of hanger, overhearing a human say,

“If I don’t get some nutrients in my system NOW I’m going to fucking stab somebody.”

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The rest of the living universe is the 2012 onceler fandom and humans are the onceler

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*Whispers in your ear* I'm not wearing anything under my skeleton

#shitposts #shitposting #bastardcore #bones :D #i used to be good at tagging #i think im just not as desperate for attention anymore :(

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My biggest flex is that I never had a phase of hating Taylor Swift for no reason. I know I'm not the only one, but I'm still proud of it