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any mention of black lives matter has disappeared off my dashboard so i thought y'all might want to know that police stormed a peaceful vigil in memory of elijah mcclain, attacking mourners with pepper spray. families were there. children were affected. this movement isnt over just because it’s no longer trendy.

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so one day he's going off on me about how I'm not doing good enough and shaming me for every little mistake and saying he doesn't even wanna be with me since I'm not doing better and then the next day I'm venting a bit about how I'm hearing from all directions that I'm not enough and how I just sometimes want someone to say I'm enough and they're proud of me and then he says I'm doing good and that he's proud of me, which directly contradicts like everything he says and it's supposed to like mean something? I don't think he is proud of me and I definitely don't think he sees me as good enough at all. I don't think he sees me at all, like he doesn't know my soul and doesn't really know me or see me. I feel like he doesn't even care to get to know me and see me like that. Just feels like he isn't interested and like until i live up to whatever standard he's set for me, he isn't gonna truly love me or want me or be really interested in me or be proud of me. Like I don't want to just hear the words "I'm proud of you", I want to believe the person saying them. What's the point in words if they don't absorb? And I get if the immediate reaction to that is "oh well there's no point in trying to help then, what am I supposed to do" like that means now it's time to make sure your actions and other words back up that statement so that when you say it, it sticks and is believable. Its almost hurtful to hear someone say something knowing they don't really mean it and are just saying the words, when you need really bad for them to actually mean it

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i literally feel like I'm worth nothing and like I'm never gonna get it together and I'll always be a mess and I'll never be good enough for anyone and everything will just keep getting harder and harder and I'll never be able to keep up. My bf acts nice sometimes but I know it isn't real and I don't feel loved or cared about or supported. I feel alone and scared and hopeless. Most of the time i feel so sad and hopeless it makes this miserable feeling all over my whole body and I'm so used to it that whenever I don't feel it, its such an incredible relief. I'm so desperate to feel loved by him that any time he does touch me in a loving and tender way, it almost makes me tear up. He could literally just say "I'm so happy you're in my life, you're so special to me" and I would probably start crying. I just never feel safe with him anymore, I feel nervous around him and I'm scared and feel like at any moment he's gonna say he wants me to leave again or some shit. He's not giving me a safe, nurturing, loving, supportive environment and then beating me up for not being my best self and not doing better. Right now, he just got done yelling at me for not doing better and not doing certain shit and said hateful shit and said he doesn't wanna be with me anymore bc I'm not doing good enough. So I'm in our bedroom, separating myself from that energy. Hestexting me about it, trying to apologize now but barely, and is playing ps4 while he texts. I'm explaining how I feel and hes just barely reading it and only replying to like one sentence instead of taking a break from playing to resolve this and fix this. He got on ps4 moment he got home and would have been nice if he wanted to hang with me a little since he's been gone for days but I guess not. He hasn't even kissed me since he got home, just a hug. Then immediately started pointing out how I didn't clean enough for him, even tho dishes were done, house was straight, high traffic area vacuumed, surfaces wiped down, bathrooms wiped down, and dinner in oven. Whole fight we just had was bc I apparently didnt have the house clean enough. I'm stuck bc I don't really wanna be here with how he's been, I'm suffering because of how hes being but my mom's house has its own issues. I'm just unsure what to do and really tired of feeling the way I have

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I'm never going to good enough for him. he resents me so much it feels like hate. he has no empathy towards me at all. I don't feel like he even sees me as a human being. He kept talking as if I was being lazy when I came home from working 3 hours away on my feet for hours straight for days strsight which I haven't done in a long time and was so sore and took a few days to do things other than doordash like work on my startup business and fafsa and shit trying to get ready for fall semester. apparently that pissed him off really bad that I didn't do doordash those days. He only cares about me bringing in money for him. My feelings, my mental health, my education, my future, none of that matters. He says I need to do doordash all week, weekends off. But then I would have to use weekends for my other shit, which gives me no day to rest. I couldn't help that my body wasn't used to that and my feet needed a break or else they would just hurt,more and more. He doesn't care about if I'm okay, what I need. It was all just so hateful and mean and empty of any love care or empathy. It was just such an ugly mindset and ugly way to talk to me. But Lord knows he won't take responsibility for that. He doesn't see how emotionally abusive he is. My well-being just keeps deteriorating and i barely even feel like a person anymore. I feel like I'm worth nothing, am nothing, I don't matter, I'm not enough, I'm disgusting, I'm hopeless, I'm undeserving of love

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Instead of reblogging every witchcraft post I come across and clogging feeds, I’m going to link them here as I find them. Check the original post for updates!

PLEASE do what you can. Go to protests. Support protestors. Share information. Educate yourself (x). Donate to bail funds and organizations. Support black artists and black-owned businesses. Watch videos that generate ad revenue. Sign petitions. Witchcraft is most effective when rooted in mundane action.

Spells:

7 Spells to Cast When Protesting

A Spell to Protect BLM Protestors

Spell to Help the BLM Movement

BLM Simple Protection Spell

White Supremacy Curse

Protection Spells and Hexes for the BLM Movement

Sigils:

Black Lives Matter

For Protection During Protests

Safety + Unite

Justice Is Served

Sign of Sedition

Justice Is Brought; POC Are Safe; Protestors Are Safe

I Am Safe From Violent Officers (and others helpful for protesting such as protection + bravery)

Collection of Sigils

Incorporating witchcraft into your action:

Using the Craft to Strengthen Your Support

Different Ways You Can Help

Other:

How to Channel Your Energy on June 5th

Tips for Witches on June 5th (and Beyond)

This post has been updated 4 times <- use this as an easy reference for updates!

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The first pride was a riot, more specifically a riot against police violence. Trans women like Miss Major and other people of colour paved the way for the celebration of pride today. You cannot celebrate your pride this month, or any month if you aren’t also supporting Black Lives Matter and the riots going on against police violence right now. Us white LGBTQ+ need to stand up for our black siblings and their rights, their struggles. We need to amplify their voices and show any support we can. (Edited to add links and make the image clearer)

Extensive BLM Google doc including places to donate to, education resources, etc

List of 75 things white people can do right now

Simple way to donate to the cause if you have no money to

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seriously though

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Like I said, delicious. (x)

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Say Her Name

Korryn Gaines

Renisha McBride

Aiyana Mo'Nay Stanley-Jones

Miriam Carey

Messy Mya

Sandra Bland

Shelly Frey

Shelley Amos

Cheryl Blount-Burton

Dawn Cameron

Sandra Bee Wilson

Juliette Alexander

Alberta Spruill

Latanya Haggerty

Annette Green

Lenties White

Tameka Evette Anthony

Octavia Suydan

Andrena Kitt

Marcella Byrd

Emma Mae Horton

Angel Chiwengo

Guanda Denise Turner

Andrea Nicole Reedy

U’Kendra Johnson

Annie Holiday

Shonda Mikelson

LaVeta Jackson

Mary Williams

Tesha Reena Collins

Darneisha Harris

Nuwnah Laroche

Clanesha Rayuna Shaqwanda Hickmon

Ciara Lee

Dijon Senay Jackson

Denise Michelle Washinton

Keara Crowder

Tyra Hunter

Clara Fay Morris

Stacey Blount

Tanisha Anderson

Gabriella Monique Nevarez

Keisha Redding

Kendra Diggs

Laquisha Turner

Keoshia L. Hill

Kindra Chapman

Audwyn Fitzgerald Ball

Rosette Samuel

Makiah Jackson

Demetria Dorsey

Jameela Yasmeen Arshad

Joyce Quaweay

Mariah Woods

Jameela Cecila Barnette

Raynetta Turner

Bianca Davis

Patricia Hartley

Martha Regina Donald

Eulia Love

Sophia King

Joyce Curnell

Redel Jones

Tessa “Teesee” Hardeman

Tamara Seidle

Alicia Griffin

Shulena Weldon

Gina Rosario

Remedy Smith

Emily Marie Delafield

Jacqueline Culp

Delois Epps

Jacqueline Nichols

Queniya Tykia Shelton

Latoya Smith

Jacqueline Reynolds

Makayla Ross

LaTricka Sloan

Ralkina Jones

Elaine Coleman

Iretha Lilly

Gynnya McMillen

Malissa Williams

Janisha Fonville

Mya Hall

Patricia Thompson

Michelle Cusseaux

Janet Wilson

Latandra Ellington

Aubrey Zoe Brown

Terry Pittman

Carulus Hines

Lana Morris

Dominique Hurtt

Michelle “Vash” Payne

Tiffini Kuuipo Tobe

Yvette Henderson

Tameka Huston

Leronda Sweatt

Kisha Michael

Portia Southern

Kisha Arrone

Jessica Williams

Jessica Nelson-Williams

Vernicia Woodward

Alexia Christian

Tyisha Miller

Kourtney Hahn

Lamia Beard

Tarkia Wilson

Deshanda “Ta-Ta” Sanchez

Sharon Rebecca McDowell

Ricky Shawatza Hall

Glenda Moore

Danette Daniels

Shontel Edwards

Sharmel Edwards

Lashonda Ruth Belk

Zoraida Reyes

Natasha Renee Osby

Kathryn Johnson

Rekha Kalawattie Budhai

Natasha McKenna

Shontel Davis

Nizah Morris

Duanna Johnson

Asia Roundtree

Darnisha Harris

Shereese Francis

Alesia Thomas

Tracy A. Wade

Yvette Smith

Lnaaar Edwards

Gabrielle Lane

Varez Michelle Cusseaux

Taneisha Anderson

Aura Rosser

Raynette Turner

Tarika Wilson

Eleanor Bumpurs

Kendra James

Ahjah Dixon

Shantel Davis

Alberta Pruill

Marjorie Domingue

Bessie Louise Stovall

Margaret Mitchell

Darnesha Harris

Frankie Perkins

Monique Deckard

Kayla Moore

Queonna Zophia Edmonds

Sheneque Proctor

Kyam Livingston

Wanda Jean Allen

Kimberly McCarthy

Meagan Hockaday

Litvishma Millerr

Summer Marie Lane

Antoinette Griffin

Desseria Whitmore

Adebusola Tairu

Erica Stevenson

Halley Simone Lee

Erika Tyrone or Erica Rhena Tyrone

Lanaka Lucas

Breeonna Mobley

Antonia Martines Lagares

Delicia C. Myers

Tameika Carter

Dana Larkin

Kassandra Perkins

Rekia Boyd

Stacey Wright

Dorothy Smith Wright

BreeAnne Green

Adaisha Miller

Bettie Jones

Catrell Ford

India Kager

Deresha Armstrong

Chanda White (Pickney)

Sahlah Ridgeway

Marlene Rivera

Lashondria Rice

Brandy Martell

Marquesha McMillan

India Beaty

Chandra Weaver

Teikeia Dorsey

Deanna Cook Patrick

Ashley Sinclair

Zella Ziona

Tiara Thomas

Papi Edwards

India Clarke

Constance Graham

Shade Schurer

Erica Collins

Rosann Miller

Lonfon Chanel

Sonji Taylor

Malaika Brooks

Ashton O’Hara

Vida DeShondrell Byrd

Maria Tripp

Eveline Barros-Cepeda

Rosa Flores Lopez

Sarah Ann Riggins

Ty Underwood

Yazmin Vash Payne

Kandis Capri

Elisha Walker

Keonna Redmond

Rikessa La’Shae Lee

Charquissa Johnson

Fatou-Mata Ntiamoah

MOVE bombing victims

Kristina Grant Infiniti

Ariel Levy

Yolanda Thomas

Marquita Bosley

Barbara Lassere

Taja Gabrielle DeJesus

Tamara Dominguez

Vionique Valnord

Linda Yancey

Amber Monroe

Brianna Elaine Carmina Ford

Kendrinka T. Williams

Arabella Bradford

Loretta Gerard

Hanna Abukar

Talana Salissa Cain

Diane Kemp

Amber Nashay Carter

Pearlie Golden

Brenda Williams

Catawaba Tequila Howard

Beverly Kirk

Tamu Malika Bouldin

Denise Gay

Anita Gay

Laura Felder

Alice Faye DeFlanders Clausell

Uteva Monique Woods Wilson

Marnell Robertson Villarreal

K.C. Haggard

Derrinesha Clay

Milinda Clark

Angela Beatrice Randolph

Denise Nicole Glasco

Mercedes Williamson

Dominique Battle

Demetra Boyd

Francine Sonnier

Angelique Styles

Linda Joyce Friday

Shari Bethel Cartmell

Ashaunti Butler

Laniya Miller

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Love & Other Drugs (2010)

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I have no idea what the fuck to do. My brain couldn't hNdle the stress anymore so it shut down and I'm just super numb and I would literally give anything for him to just be holding me and telling me everything is alright and that he's got me and him just be empathetic and loving and understanding and playing with my hair and telling me how important I am to him and how much he loves me and how special I am to him. I feel like he has no idea how madly in love with him I am and how I would literally do anything in the world for him

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tonight is one of the hardest nights of my life, I broke up with Chris. And I'm sobbing in the car watching him on our security camera app because I'm never seeing him again because that's the only way I have a shot at doing this shit and I'm just staring at the screen and imagining I'm there on the couch too, cuddled up to him and him being sweet and loving and I am an absolute pathetic miserable mess lol. and it hurts that this is the hardest night of my life but it isn't hard at all for him. He had nothing to say to me but mean shit and apathetic shit. He isn't crying one bit. Ismt even upset. He's just hanging out, totally normal, watching tv, snacking. Like its just any other night. It just makes the reality that he doesn't give a fuck about me sink in even more and even with how much I cry I haven't bawled like this in a very long time. The reality that I'm never seeing him again hasn't even fully sunk in for me and I'm still bawling my eyes out uncontrollably. I want to be with him with every fiber in my being, he's the love of my life and my best friend. I don't know how I'll ever love anyone else. I want him to love me and care about me and I want to matter to him so bad. Im honestly desperate to feel cared about and loved by him. And for him to be so okay with me being so hurt and then so okay with me leaving? It just hurts to the core and I wish it at least mattered to him or that he had anything to say to me that wasn't mean or apathetic. But I guess it's good in the long run bc if he acted loving suddenly then I would have an even harder time leaving. Honestly what I really want is him to just show me a bunch of love and care, put in a big effort, make me feel loved and cared about and like I matter and like the relationship matters and tell me he's so sorry he hurt me so much and that were going to work together as a team and he's gonna work on his apathy again and he's gonna be loving to me again and everything's gonna be okay and I matter to him and I'm special to him and we both work on ourselves and continue to grow together. But he's just so checked out of this relationsh8p and has been for so long. He's not present at all, he isn't emotionally invested in this anymore, it doesn't really matter if I stay or go. And his actions back that up

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So I had a chat on one of those online mental health help things bc I was feeling anxious and started to get upset after taking a shower and was talking about like insecurity issues and shit and this guy proceeds to tell me that my boyfriend is definitely checking out other girls, especially at the gym since I'm not in shape anymore but they are in shape so he's definitely checking out and fantasizing about the fuckin gym kittens and that it's human nature, especially since I let myself go and that I should probably get back in shape and keep my mental health to myself more so that he doesn't end up cheating on me or leaving :) and he said it as if he thought he was truly helping me lol. I remember why I stopped using that shit lmao. but tbh a lot of licensed therapists aren't any better, I've had therapists, usually guys, say the most fucked shit to me and try to fuck with my head and that shits so sickening. every person who chooses to help and work with mentally ill people and aren't truly mindful of how they're communicating and shit should be punched. so yeah basically I canf sleep and bout to smoke more weed to try and chill out because I'm freaking the fuck out lol!!

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Fungi, lichen, moss

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