gobayern16

[gobayern16]

About the AO3 "No Guest Comments for a while" warning

If you're not following any of AO3's social media accounts you might be in the dark as to what kind of "spam comments" have engendered this banner at the top of the site:

These spam comments have been posted about a great deal on the AO3 subreddit for the past couple of days. Initially they comprised a bunch of guest (logged out users) bot comments that insulted authors by suggesting they were using AI and not writing their own fics. Some examples, from the subreddit:

But it then escalated to outright graphic porn images and gifs being posted in comments, again by logged out 'Guest' accounts. Obviously, I'm not going to give examples of those, but between these two bot infestations, AO3 has clearly decided to act and has temporarily closed the ability to post comments for users who are not logged in with an AO3 account.

Unfortunately, this means that genuine readers who don't have an AO3 account won't be able to leave comments on fics that they enjoy.

If you are a genuine reader who doesn't yet have an AO3 account, I strongly suggest getting yourself on the waiting list for one. More and more AO3 authors are now locking their fics down to registered users only - either due to these bot comments or concerns about AI scraping their work - which means you're probably missing out on a lot of great stuff.

Hopefully guest commenting will be enabled again at some point soon, but I suggest not waiting until then. Get yourself on that list.

Wait times are going to be longer than usual at the moment, due to the current Wattpad purge [info on Fanlore | Wattpad subreddit thread], but if you're in line, then your invite will come through eventually.

Update: There's now a Megathread about this on the AO3 subreddit.

#ao3

[gobayern16]

“How many people have died to achieve this world domination of yours?” “769.” “…What?” “769 people died to achieve my plans. I counted them, and had each of their names etched on my throne so I never forget what my victory cost the world. Now tell me, how many have you killed to see me dead?”

[gobayern16]

[gobayern16]

Captain Fordo but I made his armor to look more like how the Arc troopers from tcw actually looked.

[gobayern16]

[gobayern16]

Step 1: Skeptical

Step 2: Skepticism is well-deserved, mission’s a bust

[gobayern16]

I haven’t posted anything in years, but since I’ve gotten into Star Wars a few months ago I’ve managed to put pencil to paper again! This is all to say:

Thank you @mandalorianbrainweasel for posting “beautiful without our war paint”, because I loved the way Alpha takes care of Fox from beginning to end!

[gobayern16]

Anecdotes of a Guard Life: Oh honey, honey

Senate Galas were one of the... Less interesting parts of Fox’s job. Stand around, look imposing yet approachable and pretend he’s not sneering behind his helmet at all the drunken Senators. Other then the approachable part, it’s a cakewalk.

That isn’t to say they don’t have their perks. One being that he’s not doing datawork. The other... Well...

The internal comms crackle to life. “The Prune’s approaching the soapbox, operation Flavour’s a go.”

Fox calmly turns and walks towards the podium, placing himself in full view to the left. He tucks his arms neatly behind him, grasping wrists and sets his feet perfectly apart in parade rest. The Chancellor passes him with a “Commander! How lovely to see you!” and Fox salutes crisply, before returning to position.

“Decoy in place,” he reports, and gets a “Received!” in return.

The rest of his role in the operation is simple. Stand there and be obvious. It’s not hard. He’s well aware of what he looks like. White painted chest armour a beacon against all the red. Helmet sticking out amongst all the uncovered faces. There’s always a few Senators who dismiss the Guard along with the rest of the serving staff, but if one is looking for them, he draws their attention.

He’s also strategically placed himself under the slightly brighter light near the podium. Carefully orchestrated by their best engineers.

He’s pretty sure this is not what the Kaminoans intended when they flash-trained them in Infiltration methods. But fuck ‘em. They also debated engineering out their tastebuds so they would eat basically anything. Instead they just fed them that anything and expected them to like it anyway.

This is their own fault, really.

Thorn casually walks around the crowd, helmet facing out, checking for any signs of trouble. The hand facing away from the crowd twitches in a series of handsigns and Fox sighs.

“Thorn, comms work just fine.”

Thorn’s sigh is heavier. “Fox, have a little fun once in a while.”

“No.”

Several different snickers come over the internal comms and a noise that is very clearly Thorn blowing him a raspberry.

Fox rolls his eyes, safe in the knowledge that no one around him can tell.

“You did get that we’re halfway done though, right?”

Fox groans, just managing to keep from tipping his head back in exasperation. “No, I forgot how to read hand signals.”

“It’s all that caf, rots the brain.”

Fox doesn’t even dignify that one with an answer. Not all of them can be all flowers and sunshine first thing in the morning.

Actually, he has absolutely no idea how any of them can be like that. Thorn is a freak of bioengineering. Somehow they got away with their blonde hair, but Fox isn’t sure how the Kaminoans missed the disgusting morning cheerfulness.

Clearly something had critically failed in their tube before decanting.

He nods absentmindedly at a Senator who’s approached and is drunkenly thanking him for his “fine service”. A click of the tongue sets his helmet to circulating internal air, but it’s not quite quick enough to prevent the stench of expensive red wine from getting through the filters. Great. He’ll have to sit with that for a while.

The man is just slurringly getting to the point where he’ll ramble about how his planet’s taxes are funding the Coruscant Guard’s efforts when Thorn speaks again.

“Fox, Taa on route to point Alpha.”

“Apologies, Senator,” he has no idea what the absolutely kark-faced Senator’s name is, but the title always works. “I am required for an internal matter.”

He doesn’t wait for the man’s wide-eyed enquiries, simply turns away and walks towards the buffet table at the other end of the hall. He can already see Senator Taa weaving his way towards the buffet table, taking advantage of the other guests being distracted.

There’s a saying. One about smart minds thinking alike or something. Fox is a little less then impressed to find Senator Taa thinking along the same lines as them. He would not bet on Senator Taa against a Kowakian monkey-lizard.

“Senator, may I have a moment?” He slides infront of him, standing like a barricade in the path of the man’s assault. Senator Taa actually jumps a good inch off the floor.

Fox probably shouldn’t be amused at that. He is though. He was also recording it. That’ll make for good viewing on a rough Senate duty.

“Ah, Commander, must it be now?” Senator Taa looks anxiously over his shoulder, and Fox calmly sidesteps to block his view of the buffet table.

“I apologise sir, this won’t take a minute.” Fox clicks his tongue at the end of that, switching the outward going comms off.

A crackle of internal comms then “Understood, troops, one minute.” from Thorn.

They could be efficient and professional, when the need was high.

What followed for Fox, was an excrutiating minute of going over security plans he was already very certain of, and manouvering himself to prevent Senator Taa from slipping round him. The Twi’lek Senator was... Persistent, would be a good way to put it. Fox was the taller of the two of them, which was fortunate, as the Senator kept rising onto tiptoes to try and look longingly over his shoulder. He’s never tilted his head so much in conversation and frankly, his neck hurts. He actually resorted to raising up on his own toes at one point.

The things he does for his troops. Force damn the little fuckers.

He can see them in his peripherals though. Casually moving towards the long table set with food, as if on a floating patrol. He’s pretty sure he spots Thire carrying away a whole roast bird of some sort, and if that’s actually the case he might have to promote the cheeky little shit...

Finally, FINALLY, Thorn walks up behind Senator Taa with a “Sir!”. The Senator jumps again, and sadly, Fox wasn’t recording that time. He’s not entirely sure how a man can be so completely oblivious to everything going on around him, but it works for their purposes.

“Commander?” Fox enquires, and as the Senator turns to face Thorn, flashes a slightly-more-emphatic than he intended THANK YOU hand signal.

“The Chancellor has requested a further perimeter sweep.” Thorn intones, voice carefully modulated to project bored professionalism.

“Understood,” Fox looks back to the Senator and nods at him. “Apologies Senator Taa, we can discuss this matter further later.”

“Yes yes, mustn’t keep you from your fine work, good job Commander,” the Senator waves dismissively at him, then heads over to the buffet table with an air of victory.

Fox watches him go, then turns back to Thorn.

“Do you think he realises you’re the one who stopped him?” Thorn asks, a thoughtful tilt to their helmet.

Fox just sighs, and walks away to the sound of Thorn’s snickers in his ear.

------

He’s only able to review their proceeds after the Gala is completely done and over, made sure everyone has left for their own homes, and checked Senator Deechi isn’t, once again, comatose drunk under a table somewhere. He marches back to the barracks (alone, because he isn’t making any of his troopers stay at one of these stupid events any longer than necessary) and makes his way straight to the second rec room.

The sound of laughter and joy hits him as soon as he rounds the corner to the hallway, and he lets go of the tension with a grateful breath. Pulling off his helmet, he strides into the room, where troopers in various mismatches of bodysuits and armour are sprawled around a lumpy pile covered in a white sheet with CG stamped in red in the corner.

“Took your time!” Thorn waves at him, grin wide and delighted. “Deechi wasn’t passed out again, was he?”

“Thank the Maker, no,” Fox rolls his eyes to chuckles from the others. “You waited for me?”

Thorn rolls their eyes right back. “Duh, get your shebs over here.”

Fox goes and sits next to them, then promptly gets back up when Thorn tries to side-arm him into a hug and goes to sit next to Comm who snickers at the pair of them. Thorn pouts. It’s a good pout, full and wide-eyed, but Fox has developed immunity to their banthashit and graces the attempt with a middle finger.

Thire sighs loudly and exasperatedly. “If the two children would kindly settle down, the adults would like to check out the spoils of battle now please?” He glowers at the pair of them, and Fox glowers back, showing him how it’s done.

Thorn reaches forward and grabs the edges of the blanket. “My friends, my family, my wonderful idiots! Enjoy!” They whip off the sheet with a flourish, and there’s gasps and noises of joy as even Fox feels his eyes widen.

They’ve outdone themselves. There’s little squares of delicate crisp bread with curls of meat pate. Glistening honey-coated carrots roasted to perfection. Candied nuts and fruit sitting powdery in a bowl. The roast bird he’s going to have to make Thire a commander over. And even...

“Is that sugar?” Fox breaths, picking up the beautiful ceramic bowl filled almost to the brim with beautiful, wonderful, white crystals of perfection...

Someone passes a steaming hot cup of caf over his shoulder and holds it out for him. “Commander,” Stone murmurs, a warm smile on his face as Fox turns to him. Comm holds out a small spoon, and Fox is not an emotional man, but he kind of wants to kiss the whole kriffing room at this point.

“Thank you,” he sniffles, taking the proferred mug (and decidedly doesn’t care that it’s the pink one with a Fox-head that Stone got him as a joke) and places it in front of him. With gentle fingers, he takes the spoon from Comm, gets himself a hearty heaped spoonful of sugar, and stirs it into the inky-dark liquid in his mug.

Reverently, he lifts the mug to his lips, tilts it gently and... Oh...

“Mesh’la,” he whispers, eyes closed and lips curving into a smile in the wake of the sweetened nectar of the little Gods.

There’s laughter all around him, and he opens his eyes to the sight of his family, all taking carefully selected pieces of food and trying them out with noises of glee and excitement.

Fox sits, sipping his delicious cup of caf, and thinks life doesn’t get much better than this.

#omg this is amazing #commander fox #silliness #star wars #the clone wars #fanfiction

[gobayern16]

fic updates

Chapter 17 of Cor Cordium is now up on AO3, and chapter 4 of amongst dust is up on Patreon!

[gobayern16]

A brief moment of rationality from the bird place.

[gobayern16]

“time spent writing star wars fic”

[gobayern16]

the image of an exhausted commander fox, sitting in his office, throttling a datapad and yelling WHY IS MY JOB SPREADSHEETS?? before yowling like a space banshee and frisbeeing the thing through the open window with all the force of kamino-guaranteed strength bolstered by buereaucratic rage, where the datapad sails merrily and speedily for a longer distance than many would credit before impacting with concussive force against the surprisingly soft skull of emperor palpatine, gladhanding for the press in the courtyard of the senate below

the resulting explosion is caught on many cameras

[gobayern16]

Little more than shadows WIP

#ezio auditore #altaïr ibn la'ahad #connor kenway #desmond miles #assassin's creed

[gobayern16]

saw a take so fucking rancid on twitter i almost deleted the entire app from my phone jesus fucking christ

first of all ao3 is an archive site. this is like going to the library and saying "oh i dont like this" on every piece of media you find that you dislike and thinking they should be stamped with some sort of a marker just cause you didnt like it

you can always click back and leave. fic writers owe you nothing to explain themselves and their creations. if they have mistagged or miscategorized fics, then i understand, however there are report tools for that instead of yelling at the artist tbh

im not saying free works arent necessarily above criticism. but this is just. fucking wild. its common courtesy to just enjoy stuff (or fucking leave if you dont, the back button is free) and if the artist specifically asks for critiques, then give one - constructive that is, shitting all over someones work is not proper criticism, mind you

i just find it fucking wild people are treating art and archive sites as social media these days like this and everything needs to be policed and ~catered to the algorithm~ like. no. ao3 doesnt have an algorithm. you should be able to fucking tell what you like and what you dont like and steer away from that kind of content and let people fucking be with their art. they dont owe you anything (except trigger warnings i'd argue, but i know some people disagree with that as well for some reason), and imagine how much more energy you'd have if you only engaged with things you liked and spent time looking at instead of going to places where you dont enjoy yourself. let alone spending time telling other people you dont enjoy what they enjoy. what a fucking life

[gobayern16]

[gobayern16]

fic updates

Chapter 16 of Cor Cordium is now up on AO3, and chapter 3 of amongst dust is up on Patreon!

[gobayern16]

other side of time update

Chapter 3 is now up!