heirceleste

[heirceleste]

a dry laugh escapes her, something that sounds almost like a sob. “i don’t get to sleep. i don’t get to rest, not until i bring you back.” cassidy doesn’t elaborate anymore, doesn’t go into detail about how she often doesn’t sleep until her body forces her to. when she does sleep, nightmares wake her, wake most of the grisha that escaped. cassidy can’t help but think of the mornings in which her throat has been raw and her voice hoarse from screaming.

“when was the last time i what general kirigan? because i can’t imagine you wanting to know the answer to that question. such as, if you were going to ask me the last time i felt hopeful or joyful i would tell you it was when i kissed i lover goodbye before being sent on a mission. or maybe when the last time i felt alone was, and then i would have to tell you that there isn’t a single moment since i saw my lover at the winter fete with another woman that i haven’t felt alone.” can’t help but shake as she speaks, stopping only as they reach the tree she mentioned previously.

“this is where you can rest general. i’ll keep a watch and wake you if there’s any disturbances.” drops the pack from her bag and surveys the area before taking a seat where she has a good view of the surrounding area. “if you’re cold let me know and i’ll start a fire, but i’d rather not risk the light or smoke.”

the air between them is heavy, but still cassidy moves. doesn’t let the silence or weight bother her as the sky darkens around them and the air begins to chill. doesn’t stop walking as she takes the pack off of her back and pulls out rations, a small amount of dried meat and a piece of bread. hands it to aleksander wordlessly before pulling out a piece of bread for herself.

eats slowly as they walk, not stopping or checking in until the bread is long gone and the moon is high in the night sky. swallows before she speaks, refuses to let tears over come her once more and focuses on the fact that he is her general first. “there will be a tree with a large canopy coming up, it makes for good shelter and we can rest there for a while. we need to move again before first light and should be to the others by the time the sun has reached its peak.

“i can take watch while you rest. once we’ve met up there will be a healer to look you over. two of us each to a horse, one healer two heartrenders and a squaller make up the group. i’ll likely sleep for most of the ride back,” cassidy explains. knows she won’t be able to sleep until they’ve made it, that if she does she won’t be easy to wake and that isn’t a risk they can take.

#thread: cassidy

[heirceleste]

what is beautiful is good 

independent lesbian original characters featured on @heirceleste 

promo credit to @gentlebcnes​

[heirceleste]

Reunion after (physical) trauma prompts

tws apply: grief/fear for someone’s life, mention of injuries, unconsciousness, hospitals, comas, mention of involuntary drugging. that’s the general vibe.

WORDS

“Theeeere you are. Hi. Welcome back.”

“Breathe. Hi, we found you, just breathe for me, okay?”

“This is going to hurt, but it will help you.”

“You’re safe. [Name], can you hear me? They’re here to help you, you need to let them help you.”

“I found them, they’re over here!”

“Does anyone have medical training?”

“N.. no, no, no, no, hey. [Name]? Hi, I’ve got you.”

“You can sleep, [name]. It’s over.”

“I’ll still be here when you wake up.”

“You were in an induced coma. Your body went through a lot.”

“I wasn’t –… Your doctors weren’t sure you’d wake up.”

“[Name]? Was that - did you squeeze my hand?”

“It’s okay. It’s meant to be there, it’s helping you breathe.”

“Can you hear me?”

“You.. you were so close to dying. I was scared.”

ACTIONS

[ GATHER ] for sender to gather receiver’s (unconscious) body into their arms, in the style of no no no not them.

[ STARING ] for sender to find receiver sitting alone staring at a wall, covered in blood, and to touch their arm.

[ WAITING ] for sender to be waiting at receiver’s hospital bedside when receiver finally comes out of a coma, or wakes from surgery.

[ STEADY ] for sender to catch or steady receiver when receiver tries to stand up too early or to push their body past what it’s ready for

[ TEARS ]  for receiver to find tears on sender’s face, when they’re finally reunited (either immediately after the trauma, or waking up in a hospital), because sender thought receiver was dead or dying

[ GRIEF ]  for receiver to wake up just as sender is saying goodbye, because the doctors told them to. feel free to specify what they might be saying. do not judge me, this is going in the meme

[ LETTER ] for sender to find a last letter, video, text, etc that receiver made for them, thinking they wouldn’t make it out of the situation alive. Obviously receiver does make it out alive, but the letter/video still exists (and receiver will detail what’s in it).

[ FIGHT ] for receiving muse to not recognize sender or medical staff trying to help them, due to being drugged or otherwise disoriented – so they fight.

[heirceleste]

Send “I’ve got you” to help my muse wash off blood from their body

[heirceleste]

PROMPTS FOR FORBIDDEN LOVE *  assorted dialogue for secret lovers

did anyone see you?

did you tell them about us?

where have you been? i didn't think you were coming.

i barely managed to sneak out.

this won't be the last time you see me.

someone nearly caught me on the way here.

does anyone else know about us?

did you get my note?

i waited up all night for you.

you're worth fighting for.

i don't know how much more of this i can take.

how did you get in?

i don't care what my friends think.

they don't want us to be happy.

i know i'm not supposed to want you.

i'm not supposed to keep seeing you.

we shouldn't meet like this.

you're the only thing on my mind.

i'm not giving up on us.

i saw your letter.

if someone finds us, run.

no matter what they say, i still want to be with you.

i thought you weren't coming.

they say you're not good for me.

you'll see me again. i promise.

they want me to marry someone else.

what if we ran off and got married?

they'll never understand how much i love you.

do they know about us?

they just don't understand us.

do you believe in true love?

you're being too loud! someone will hear!

if i can't have you, i don't know what i'll do.

you're the one i love, not them.

if anyone finds out, we're screwed.

i've waited all day to kiss you.

hold me for a while, will you?

i missed you. i thought about you all day.

meet me tonight.

i can't keep doing this.

i wish we could get married.

are you proposing?

there's a tree by my window. you could climb it.

i hate this distance.

we could disappear.

i've never felt this way about anyone.

no one's going to stop me from seeing you.

they think you're a bad influence on me.

shh! someone's coming!

they want me to marry a stranger.

i'm done hiding.

am i worth fighting for?

this isn't a crush. this is love.

we'll find a way somehow.

i'm sorry. i had to tell them the truth about us.

we shouldn't be ashamed of this.

why don't they see we're perfect for one another?

we don't need their approval.

you make me happy. that's all that matters.

meet me tomorrow night.

out there, we could be ourselves.

i've been in love with you all this time.

i wish our families would stop fighting.

is that a wedding ring?

i wish this night would never end.

sneak into my room.

what if we just run off together?

i don't think we should meet again.

maybe someday, we'll be together.

maybe this was a bad idea.

when you close your eyes at night, do you dream of me?

i don't know how much more my heart can take.

why can't they just accept us?

i'm not ashamed of loving you.

we could find a place where no one knows our names.

[heirceleste]

oh look an actual goddess

promo credit to @gentlebcnes

[heirceleste]

she reads the paper two times and looks over the map in front of them before responding. “it’s hard to say, but i’m not sure i would trust it. there’s plenty of small villages and areas that have their own names or nicknames from the locals. but you shouldn’t refer to it as such when providing intel,” cassidy points out. thinks over her own past missions and trainings as she looks over the letter and tries to imagine herself as the spy in question.

“no i wouldn’t trust this. my guess is that someone is on to them. you give your connections information that is mostly true but change something small, like the name of a city. it helps you to trace where the leak is. i’ve done it more than once and typically it ends in bloodshed. if your spy isn’t dead already they should be extracted because they will be soon.” the fact that the information got back to the general troubles her, wants to know more about the situation. placing her hand on aleksander’s back she gives his shoulder a soft squeeze.

“if you give me a map i can work on adding in the local names of cities. at least the ones in fjerda and some in kerch, the nicknames locals use and such it may help to decipher what intel can be trusted or show more clearly where spies may be.”

cassidy shakes her head, at the question. “i don’t hear much i’m typically in the north or even west ravka. but i have a contact in caryeva, last i heard it was tense. the heat in the south gets to people differently than the frost does, it can be difficult to those not accustomed and even alter their minds.” it had been a conversation over drinks, the way young soldiers didn’t always prepare and how the sun would scorch their minds as it had their flesh.

“there was one rumor, that in some areas of shu han grisha were worth enough money that it was better to sell them than alert the government to their presence. the same girl the told me about how the sun can melt a soldier’s brain if they aren’t prepared mentioned it to me.” picks up the pile of reports and filters through until she finds a report that she knows to be true, the same girl that had been her informant and her big mouth still the subject of intel reports. “she was a fellow dancer, good intel and observant. mostly she loved to gossip after a day of rehearsing. i think we danced together in kerch but i can’t remember.” cassidy looks at a few reports and hands him ones she doesn’t fully trust. either not enough information or far more detail than is reasonable given the circumstances.

#thread: cassidy

[heirceleste]

taylor swift lyrics, the tortured poets department edition, part one

fortnight

▸ i was supposed to be sent away but they forgot to come and get me. ▸ i was a functioning alcoholic till nobody noticed my new aesthetic. ▸ no one here's to blame but what about your quiet treason? ▸ for a fortnight there, we were forever. ▸ i took the miracle move-on drug, the effects were temporary. ▸ i love you, it's ruining my life. ▸ thought of calling you but you won't pick up.

the tortured poets department

▸ who uses typewriters anyway? ▸ you're in self-sabotage mode. ▸ we're modern idiots. ▸ you smoked then ate seven bars of chocolate. ▸ i chose this cyclone with you. ▸ sometimes i wonder if you're gonna screw this up with me. ▸ so tell me, who else is gonna know me? ▸ that's the closest i've come to my heart exploding.

my boy only breaks his favorite toys

▸ you should've seen them when they first got me. ▸ i only break my favourite toys. ▸ i should've known it was a matter of time. ▸ we could've played for keeps this time. ▸ i know i'm just repeating myself. put me back on my shelf. ▸ i'll tell you that [you/they] run because [you/they] love me. ▸ i knew too much. ▸ you saw forever so you smashed it up. ▸ once i fix me, you're gonna miss me. ▸ you took me out of my box, stole my tortured heart, left all these broken parts and told me i'm better off but i'm not.

down bad

▸ for a moment, i knew cosmic love. ▸ now i'm down bad, crying at the gym. ▸ everything comes out of teenage petulance. ▸ fuck it if i can't have [you/them]. ▸ i might just die, it would make no difference. ▸ i might just not get up, i might just stay down bad. ▸ fuck it, i was in love.

so long, london

▸ my spine split from carrying us up the hill. ▸ i stopped trying to make you laugh. ▸ how much sad did you think i had in me? ▸ i didn't opt in to be your odd man out. ▸ i'm pissed off you let me give you all that youth for free. ▸ you say i abandoned the ship but i was going down with it. ▸ my friends said it isn't right to be scared every day of a love affair. ▸ just how low did you think i'd go before i'd self-implode? ▸ you swore that you loved me but where were the clues? ▸ i'm just mad as hell 'cause i loved this place.

but daddy i love him

▸ i just learned these people only raise you to cage you. ▸ i just learned these people try and save you 'cause they hate you. ▸ they slammed the door on my whole world. the one thing i wanted. ▸ you should see your face. ▸ no i'm not coming to my senses. ▸ i know [you/they]'re crazy but [you/they]'re the one i want. ▸ all my plans were laid. ▸ growing up precocious sometimes means not growing up at all. ▸ i'll tell you something right now, i'd rather burn my whole life down than listen to one more second of all this bitching and moaning. ▸ i'll tell you something about my good name, it's mine alone to disgrace. ▸ i don't cater to all these vipers dressed in empath's clothing. ▸ god save the most judgmental creeps who say they want what's best for me. ▸ you ain't gotta pray for me if all you want is gray for me. then it's just white noise and it's just my choice. ▸ scandal does funny things to pride but brings lovers closer. ▸ fuck 'em, it's over. ▸ time, doesn't it give some perspective?

fresh out the slammer

▸ fresh out the slammer, i know who my first call will be to. ▸ handcuffed to the spell i was under, for just one hour of sunshine. ▸ years of labor, locks and ceilings, in the shade of how [they were] feeling. ▸ it's gonna be alright, i did my time. ▸ as i said in my letters, now that i know better, i will never lose my baby again. ▸ my friends tried but i wouldn't hear it, watched me daily disappearing. ▸ ain't no way i'm gonna screw up, now that i know what's at stake here.

florida!!!

▸ you can beat the heat if you beat the charges too. ▸ they said i was a cheat, i guess it must be true. ▸ this city reeks of driving myself crazy. ▸ little did you know, your home's really only a town you're just a guest in. ▸ i'm barricaded in the bathroom with a bottle of wine. ▸ well, me and my ghosts, we had a hell of a time. ▸ yes, i'm haunted but i'm feeling just fine. ▸ all my girls got their lace and their crimes. ▸ i did my best to lay to rest all of the bodies that have ever been on my body. ▸ i've got some regrets, i'll bury them in florida. ▸ tell me i'm despicable, say it's unforgivable. ▸ love left me like this and i don't want to exist.

#meme

[heirceleste]

taylor swift lyrics, ttpd: the anthology edition, part one

the black dog

▸ i am someone who, until recent events, you shared your secrets with. ▸ your location, you forgot to turn it off. ▸ i just don't understand how you don't miss me. ▸ old habits die screaming. ▸ i move through the world with the heartbroken. ▸ i may never open up the way i did for you. ▸ do you hate me? was it hazing? ▸ now i want to sell my house and set fire to all my clothes and hire a priest to come and exorcise my demons even if i die screaming. ▸ i hope it's shitty.

imgonnagetyouback

▸ you did your research, you knew the price going in. ▸ i can tell when somebody still wants me. come clean. ▸ i'm gonna get you back. ▸ you'll find that you were never not mine. ▸ i can take the upper hand and touch your body, flip the script and leave you like a dumb house party. ▸ whether i'm gonna flip you off or pull you into a closet, i haven't decided yet. ▸ even if it's handcuffed, i'm leaving here with you. ▸ i hate you but i love you just the same. ▸ pick your poison. i'm poison either way.

the albatross

▸ cross your thoughtless heart. ▸ one bad seed kills the garden. ▸ they tried to warn you about me. ▸ devils that you know raise worse hell than a stranger. ▸ you're in terrible danger. ▸ i've been there too and none of it matters. ▸ i was sleeping soundly when they dragged me from my bed. ▸ the devil that you know looks now more like an angel. ▸ i'm the life you chose and all this terrible danger.

chloe or sam or sophia or marcus

▸ i loved you the way that you were. ▸ you needed me but you needed drugs more and i couldn't watch it happen. ▸ i changed into goddesses, villains and fools, changed plans and lovers and outfits and rules all to outrun my desertion of you. ▸ cooler in theory but not if you force it to be. ▸ will i always wonder?

how did it end?

▸ come one, come all. it's happening again. ▸ i'll tell no one except all of my friends. ▸ how did it end? ▸ lost the game of chance, what are the chances? ▸ guess who we ran into at the shops. ▸ didn't you hear they called it all off? ▸ my beloved ghost and me, sitting in a tree, d-y-i-n-g. ▸ i can't pretend like i understand.

so high school

▸ i feel so high school every time i look at you. ▸ tell me about the first time you saw me. ▸ your friends are around so be quiet. ▸ are you gonna marry, kiss or kill me? ▸ no one's ever had me, not like you. ▸ touch me while your bros play Grand Theft Auto. ▸ you knew what you wanted and you got me. ▸ i'm hearing voices, like a madman.

i hate it here

▸ quick, quick. tell me something awful. ▸ tell me all your secrets. ▸ all you'll ever be is my eternal consolation prize. ▸ i don't believe in good luck now that i know what's what. ▸ i'm there most of the year 'cause i hate it here. ▸ nostalgia is a mind's trick. ▸ i'm lonely but i'm good. ▸ i'm bitter but i swear i'm fine. ▸ this place made me feel worthless.

thank you aimee

▸ all that time you were throwing punches, i was building something. ▸ i can't forgive the way you made me feel but i can't forget the way you made me heal. ▸ it wasn't a fair fight or a clean kill. ▸ i built a legacy that you can't undo. ▸ there wouldn't be this, if there hadn't been you. ▸ maybe you've reframed it and in your mind you never beat my spirit black and blue. ▸ i don't think you've changed much.

#meme

[heirceleste]

cassidy nods her head in thanks at ivan before following aleksander. foot steps are near silent in the hall and she can hear everyone exiting the war room as they move further away. she continues to twirl her braid in hand, barely avoids gnawing at her lip as she waits for the go ahead to speak. can’t help but wonder if maybe ivan was right and she should have just waited, wonders if it was anyone else if aleksander would have ended the meeting.

when he stops walking, cassidy does as well, taking in the space around them. “are we waiting for ivan or anyone else to join us? give me the word and i’ll detail everything i’ve learned regarding the letter.” don’t kiss him. don’t kiss him. don’t kiss him. don’t tell him you miss and love him. don’t ask about his day. don’t ask why ivan doesn’t trust her. focus on the mission cassidy, this is serious.

cassidy stands at attention when ivan and aleksander enter the corridor, mindful of the fact that she isn't standing in front of her boyfriend - her lover - but her general. "thank you ivan, moi soverenyi i apologize for interrupting your meeting. i got back late last night and this letter was waiting for me," hands him the same letter she had handed ivan, "its from nina and i verified all of the information before bringing it to you." doesn't mention that it was so late last night it could have been early this morning. that her lead had been a dead end and with a storm incoming she cut her losses and left early.

"i can debrief you on my early return later, but we should discuss the contents of this letter somewhere more secure." resists the urge to twirl the end of her braid in nervousness, hates that there's a million things to discuss with him, that ivan is right there and she can't take a moment to kiss him. knows that even though she is no longer a secret, it would be far from appropriate, especially considering the intel she's delivering. "it concerns the northern front," cassidy explains, voice dropped to a whisper.

#thread: cassidy

[heirceleste]

surrounded by darkness yet enfolded in light

independent demon/goddess original character located @heirceleste

[heirceleste]

moon dust in your lungs, stars in your eyes, you are a child of the cosmos, a ruler of the skies

independent witch/werewolf original character located @heirceleste

[heirceleste]

i love this character so much......i hope they get seriously injured and almost die

[heirceleste]

she glows golden like a honeycomb

independent magical original character located @heirceleste​

[heirceleste]

a whole new world / sentence starters.

for muses who aren’t used to things being… like this. safe. (for muses who haven’t felt safe in a long time.)

to the helper.

“What are you doing? What’s that?”

“I need your help.”

“I don’t understand.”

“Is… that’s medicine?”

“They wouldn’t believe me.”

“Why are you taking care of me?”

“What do you want?”

“I don’t speak to a lot of people.”

“I don’t know what’s going on.”

“I’m… kind of scared.”

“You’re wasting your time.”

“I don’t want to talk about it. I don’t even want to think about it.”

“Report it to who? They wouldn’t care.”

“This was my fault.”

from the helper.

“How long have you been out here?” 

“I’m going to give you something for the pain now, okay? It will help.”

“Lean on me. It’s okay. Lean on me, I’ve got you.”

“Things aren’t normally like that. You know that, right?”

“The world is a lot better than what they told you.”

“You don’t have to obey them anymore.”

“Yeah. You’re alive.”

“How are you feeling?”

“You didn’t deserve that. Nobody deserves that.” 

“It’s just water. It’s just water, here, I’ll drink some, see? It’s just water.”

“Nobody here is going to hurt you.” 

“You were pretty roughed up when you came in.”

“Do you remember what happened?”

“You should know, this is the sort of thing I have to report to the police.”

“Would you like to make a statement?”

[heirceleste]

PROMPTS FOR FORBIDDEN LOVE *  assorted dialogue for secret lovers

did anyone see you?

did you tell them about us?

where have you been? i didn't think you were coming.

i barely managed to sneak out.

this won't be the last time you see me.

someone nearly caught me on the way here.

does anyone else know about us?

did you get my note?

i waited up all night for you.

you're worth fighting for.

i don't know how much more of this i can take.

how did you get in?

i don't care what my friends think.

they don't want us to be happy.

i know i'm not supposed to want you.

i'm not supposed to keep seeing you.

we shouldn't meet like this.

you're the only thing on my mind.

i'm not giving up on us.

i saw your letter.

if someone finds us, run.

no matter what they say, i still want to be with you.

i thought you weren't coming.

they say you're not good for me.

you'll see me again. i promise.

they want me to marry someone else.

what if we ran off and got married?

they'll never understand how much i love you.

do they know about us?

they just don't understand us.

do you believe in true love?

you're being too loud! someone will hear!

if i can't have you, i don't know what i'll do.

you're the one i love, not them.

if anyone finds out, we're screwed.

i've waited all day to kiss you.

hold me for a while, will you?

i missed you. i thought about you all day.

meet me tonight.

i can't keep doing this.

i wish we could get married.

are you proposing?

there's a tree by my window. you could climb it.

i hate this distance.

we could disappear.

i've never felt this way about anyone.

no one's going to stop me from seeing you.

they think you're a bad influence on me.

shh! someone's coming!

they want me to marry a stranger.

i'm done hiding.

am i worth fighting for?

this isn't a crush. this is love.

we'll find a way somehow.

i'm sorry. i had to tell them the truth about us.

we shouldn't be ashamed of this.

why don't they see we're perfect for one another?

we don't need their approval.

you make me happy. that's all that matters.

meet me tomorrow night.

out there, we could be ourselves.

i've been in love with you all this time.

i wish our families would stop fighting.

is that a wedding ring?

i wish this night would never end.

sneak into my room.

what if we just run off together?

i don't think we should meet again.

maybe someday, we'll be together.

maybe this was a bad idea.

when you close your eyes at night, do you dream of me?

i don't know how much more my heart can take.

why can't they just accept us?

i'm not ashamed of loving you.

we could find a place where no one knows our names.

#meme

[heirceleste]

fluffy scenarios and actions that make my heart melt

prompt list by @novelbear

going in for a kiss and either bumping noses or foreheads

that warm feeling they get when they successfully make the other laugh out loud

brushing their hair for them and smiling fondly as they just ramble about their day

^ or even drying it when they're too lazy to when they just get out of the shower

peppering kisses all over their face nonstop, making the other laugh out a plead for mercy

lying together in silence, one playing with the string of the hoodie on their lover's chest

playing with their hair until they fall asleep

spraying whipped cream on the other's nose and kissing it off

one gaming (or focusing on something) normally whilst the other styles their hair in silly little ways

wrapping themselves around the other to help them out with something (baking, working out, etc.)

pictures being taken while out on dates, making sure to compliment their lover after each one they capture

walking together hand-in-hand and having their arms swing slightly

holding them close and noticing the smell of their shampoo in their hair

asking the other to sing for them

reading together

^ one reading aloud as the other is lying on their shoulder, dozing off to the sound of their voice

burying their face into the other's chest/shoulder when they get embarrassed or shy

when they go over to sit on their lap and cup their cheeks, lovingly staring into their eyes oh my god

#meme