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heyitsremus · 2 years
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*Remus and Sirius eating at a café*
Remus: *eating cutie oranges and notices Siruis staring at him*
Remus: *offering him some* cutie?
Siruis: i know i’m cute, you don’t have to tell me <3
Remus: *rolls eyes* yeah i guess you are a bit cute
Sirius: *blushes*
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heyitsremus · 2 years
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When you find a fic on your favourite ship, with an amazing plot and all the tropes you like.
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heyitsremus · 2 years
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remus is the kind of person who people would assume would take great care of his books when he would actually fold the pages and be done, but the moment someone else lays a finger on his books all hell breaks loose.
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heyitsremus · 2 years
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i can’t talk rn, i’m doing hot girl shit
*10 min version of all too well starts playing*
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heyitsremus · 2 years
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remus: i want chocolate
sirius: *sits on his lap* why have chocolate when you can have me instead?
remus: …
remus: i’m gonna go get chocolate
sirius: …
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heyitsremus · 2 years
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gryffindor dormitories, 70s:
*maraduers getting ready for class one morning*
Sirius: Ew,ew,ew, ew ,ew and EW!
Peter: Is it a spider? You know I hate spiders!
*James pulls out his wand, ready to fight the spider*
Remus: What is it pads?
*Sirius throws a Slytherin tie on the ground, over dramatically*
Sirius: THAT FILTHY THING TOUCHED ME!
Peter, confused: Since when are Slytherins pulling pranks on us?
*James, coughing. Remus looks at him side eyed and picks the tie up.*
Remus: Yeah! One filthy prank in deed *pauses* James why don’t you threw this out aye. Pads let’s get you clean up.
*
One hour later:
Mcgonagall: Mr. Black how much more times do I have to remind you that ties are mandatory during school period. 5 points from Slytherin.
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heyitsremus · 2 years
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The Perks of Being a Wallflower (2012)
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heyitsremus · 2 years
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when she says she doesn’t send nudes
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heyitsremus · 2 years
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death eater : we have your brother
james : what ?? which one ?
death eater : uhm, very tall, scars all over his face, ugly sweater ?
james : oh it's remus, i was scared you got peter for a second
james : anyway, u don't have him, he has you, good luck
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heyitsremus · 2 years
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Kiss Me
pairing: wolfstar (remus x sirius)
warnings: recreational drug use
tags: fluff, first kiss
words: 998
a/n: this is a request from someone on instagram :D
prompt:
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Tick tick tick tick tick tick tick…
Sirius glanced at the watch on his wrist, seconds turning into minutes turning into hours.
It was 4:52. On any other day, this time would mean absolutely nothing to Sirius but today was Thursday, the day Remus ran his study group and it was supposed to end at 4:30. That was 22 minutes ago.
Sirius was getting antsy. He didn’t want to seem obsessed with Remus’ whereabouts but he and Remus were supposed to meet behind greenhouse 3 at 3:40 to smoke the last bit of Remus’ stash of pot before the summer. It was a shitty last hurrah to 6 year, their last year before things got serious but it was their thing. Sirius rested his head against the glass of the greenhouse and closed his eyes feeling tired. The full moon had only been a few days earlier and he was still tired. But that was nothing compared to what Remus must be feeling, he reminded himself. He didn’t hear the sound of footsteps approaching until he saw a shadow appear over him. He looked up.
“Remus! What took you so long?” Sirius said, eyes widening in relief. He was mostly just relieved to see that Remus hadn’t been kidnapped by Lily to do “extra study”, which was what they liked to call it, but in reality, all it involved them huddling at a table in the corner of the common room whispering, giggling and gossiping about whoever Remus was shagging currently and Sirius feeling jealous of whoever they were talking about.
“Sorry!” Remus panted slightly, “I got held up. Some first year wanted me to help them with potions which you know I’m absolutely pants at and then I had to finish my arithmancy homework and I had that bloody fifth year Lockhart talking in my ear about he didn’t really need to be there and he was only coming to help other students, when in fact he’s absolutely shit at all his classes and was only there to copy off the other ravenclaws but he can’t admit it because he’s an absolute arse,” he said talking with his hands and sinking down next to Sirius.
“Sounds shit. Did you bring it?” Sirius asked, tilting his head towards Remus.
“Oh yeah I did, just gimme a sec,” Remus said, fishing around his robe pockets and practically emptying out the entire contents as stray quills, chocolate, parchment, dung bombs and other miscellaneous items fell out.
“Got it!” He said, finally pulling out the small metal container and opening it, passing a joint to Sirius. Sirius watches Remus as he pulls out his wand to light it but Sirius stops him, grabbing his wrist, suddenly getting an idea.
“Watch this,” he says, and snaps his fingers together. A spark appears from his fingers and in a second, the joint is lit.
“Oi! Where did you learn that and why didn’t you teach me!” Remus says, eyes widening in a mixture of surprise and alarm.
“Got a 7th year bloke to teach me before he took me up to his room and we fucked,” Sirius says breathing in the smoke.
“Ok 1. Too much information mate and 2. You’re an absolute wanker. How long have you been holding that valuable piece of information in?” Remus says matter of factly, a small smile playing on the corners of his mouth.
“Long enough,” He says, exhaling deeply and looking at Remus again. He passes the joint to Remus, admiring the way Remus’ fingers grasp it, the way his chest rises and falls as he draws a breath in, the way he visibly relaxes with each puff.
They sit together in comfortable silence, sharing the joint until it’s finished, then taking another out of the box, lighting it and repeating the process. Sirius ignores the grumble of his stomach, preferring to focus on how pretty Remus looks. He draws a breath in, resting his head on Remus’ shoulder.
“I kissed you,” he says softly, before his brain kick starts. “I mean- I missed you!” He says quickly correcting himself praying that Remus didn’t notice his slip up. “Merlin, I wish I kissed you, fucking hell,” he mutters before realising what was coming out of his mouth.
“What?” Remus asks, looking at Sirius with wide eyes.
“I mean- Not kiss uh… miss yep um…,” Sirius stutters out, straightening and feeling hot all over.
“No, what did you say?” Remus asks, with a look that Sirius feels like he should be able to understand and suddenly wishing he wasn’t quite so high.
“Uh nothing I just said that iwishikissedyou” he says extremely quickly and quietly.
There’s a silence that lasts for way too long in Sirius’ opinion and he’s starting to regret saying anything in the first place. He turns it head towards the ground and death stares at it, praying that it’ll open up and swallow him whole.
“Kiss me,” Remus says softly and Sirius can feel his eyes on him.
“W-What?” Sirius says, making eye contact with him.
“I said,” Remus repeats himself looking into Sirius’ eyes, “Kiss me,”. His cheeks are definitely pink, Sirius knows that for sure. He can see them glowing slightly and he’s sure his own face is on fire.
“Please,” he says hoarsely and suddenly feeling like there's way too much space between them. Sirius leans forward, raising his hand to cup his cheek before leaning in and kissing him.
The kiss was slow and tentative and short, but a thousand words were communicated in those few seconds. They pulled apart gently, their foreheads resting together.
“I really really like you,” Sirius whispers, eyes still closed.
“Well I fancy you like mad so we’re even,” Remus whispers back. Sirius feels Remus’ hand slowly snake around the back of his neck and into his hair. He feels Remus’ fingers run through it and rests his forehead on Remus’ shoulder, enjoying the perfect alignment of time, circumstances and a stash of pot.
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heyitsremus · 2 years
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the marauders as conversations i’ve had with my friends pt. 2
remus: ew a fly just went in my ear
marlene: eat it
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heyitsremus · 2 years
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remus owned patterned socks literally fight me if you disagree
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heyitsremus · 2 years
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sirius: wow it’s really hot in here *taking off shirt*
remus: i get that but why are you taking off my shirt?
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heyitsremus · 2 years
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the marauders would’ve loved peppa pig and charlie and lola
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heyitsremus · 2 years
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rip regulus black. you would’ve loved that swimming episode of peppa pig
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heyitsremus · 2 years
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“remus sweared like a sailor” i say into the mic
everyone applauds. no backlash. it is a fact
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heyitsremus · 2 years
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the marauders as conversations i’ve had with my friends
remus: why is it socially unacceptable to throw children
marlene: ikr
lily: ikr
sirius: wait it’s socially unacceptable to throw children?
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