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hippie-girl-19-77 10 months
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My heart is breaking 馃挃. I tried to take my life to get the hurt to stop. But the Gods had other plans and keep me alive. I wish this cruel life would stop. My dreams are falling apart and all I can do is stand here.
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hippie-girl-19-77 1 year
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I'm wilting like a flower. The joy I found in life is fulled with uncertainty. My life has been pulled right out from under me. My ground and foundation has been pulled out of me. I don't know if I have the strength to pull one foot of the other again. I had felt safe and secure. I was working on being a partner felling in more love with him. To come home to find another woman in my bed with him. I'm hurting and I'm not being heard. I feel silent on how I feel and on what I'm thinking. So I feel I should just silent myself forever seen I'm not being heard or being seen. I love my children I do but I don't want them to follow my heartbreak and learn to be used and thrown away. I want to free them from this broken person that I have become. I hurt so bad inside that it hurt to breath. I can't sleep or eat. I feel like a shell of myself.
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hippie-girl-19-77 2 years
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I have just left your arms and I'm missing you so much that I can scream in to the night. How I wish I could just throw everything away for you. To spend the rest of my life in your arms. I feel that I'm torn in two with this life I lead. I want to be yours and only yours. The ghost in my home even comfort me when I cry
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hippie-girl-19-77 2 years
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Watch "Honest - Kyndal Inskeep & Song House (Official Music Video)" on YouTube
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hippie-girl-19-77 2 years
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I'm thinking it's coming time after all this time to say farwell to my dreams of us. It hurt has hurt everytime listening to you talk about other like she is the one this time. It's just heartbreaking don't know if I can stand on the sidelines again. To turn from my 16 year old self that saw you and got to know you. I fell in love with you then. I'm sorry that I couldn't tell you then that's how I was feeling cause I was just getting to know myself. I listen to how I was and how I had felt before my accident not how I feel now or this is me now. I can follow whatever path I need to I will. But I'll keep following this path with him even if I only care for him. If you are not in my future plans to be with there no reason to change things.
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hippie-girl-19-77 2 years
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I feel like my life is coming to a cross roads. Which path to follow the one of my hearts desires that isn't certain if what I want is there or this path I've been following seen things keep pushing this way. It's been heart breaking crying into the night about how I feel about you. But you can't seem to see how I feel. Always blame the wrong person why I won't do want you want. I want to be loved but I want my freedom to love you in my way. I don't need to be control nor do I want to be owned. I want to watch you bloom in to the person you want to be. Not cave to others wants or desire. Watching you talk about doing something for yourself made me some happy being able to watch you bloom fulls my heart. I want to be apart of your life. Cause I have love you so much. But I know if I fall to early in to your waiting arms I'll be swallowed whole and never be able to breathe again. My everything would be gone. When you would tired of me cause I didn't live up to your ideas about love you would destroy me and leave me open and bleeding an I would be smiling as I die.
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hippie-girl-19-77 2 years
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my old friends
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hippie-girl-19-77 2 years
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If today you show up asking for my love. Saying you wanted not just me but my dreams for a family. I would drop everything for you. Knowing you would help not with just your dreams but mine also.
Over the year that you had wanted me it just been me and to rule over the things in my life. You have tried making me choose my children or you. I am sorry but I love my children. They came from my body. They grow in my body and I want to help them grow to be loving people. You have always thought I was putting another man before you but that hasn't been the truth. The truth is circumstances of waiting for you has lead to me being with others in the waiting seen I know you. When you are with someone you set yourself to be with only one til they fail to be what you think they should be. It's what keeps me at a distance. I think I'll always love you and carrie this pain in my heart for loving you and never really being with you. When we do come together it's the must wonderful thing in the world to me. Even if it's just listening to you speak, just sharing a kisses and listening to you dream again. I just want to be apart of your life even if it's just being a friend. This love will always be burning for you. I'm just waiting for you to be able to hold the flame and not be burned by it. Cause I come with more then a body to warm your bed. I want to light up you life with everything children, a dream, adventure and the possibilities are endless. You have to be ready
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hippie-girl-19-77 2 years
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I have a hole in my heart.
It's hurts daily.
I have no idea how to stop the pain
Nothing I do full it but to be in your arms
Which is going to be gone soon
All that I know is I cause pain where I walk
I had dreams of a big family and loving people around
But all I do is put people who want to use us
I feel so alone so empty
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hippie-girl-19-77 2 years
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My son is my world. I want him to be proud in his mother. Why can't I be what I need to be
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hippie-girl-19-77 2 years
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Do you spend your nights thinking of me? Wishing things could be different. I think of being in your arms giving you the love you deserve 鉁笍 why did thinks have to be what they are. You wanted different things then I. I wanted a family and a home to build together. You want drugs, alcohol and a easy life without responsibilities. Why do I feel this strong feeling for you. Every time I kiss you it is intoxing is so addictive. Taste so good that I want to melt in to you. You want to rule my body and soul. I run from this cause I don't want to be ruled. I want my freedom to be me
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hippie-girl-19-77 2 years
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The pain I walk on a daily basis in silence. I'll keep you in my heart with the pain of not having you in my life with a smile on my face with tears in my eyes
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hippie-girl-19-77 2 years
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Will I be a happy memory or a bitter memory or no thought at all. The pain of letting you go. How I wish I could stop playing cat and mouse with you. An love you with my all.
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hippie-girl-19-77 2 years
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https://youtu.be/V1Pl8CzNzCw
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hippie-girl-19-77 2 years
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hippie-girl-19-77 2 years
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hippie-girl-19-77 2 years
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