holisticbudo
Holistic Budo by Robert Van Valkenburgh
Lead. Inspire. Create.
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Choosing Associations
Your character is determined by your associations.
Who you are around is who you become.
Choose your associations carefully.
And your associations are not merely the people you are in direct contact with.
What you read, watch, and listen to shapes your character as well.
You become who and what you interact with.
Decide who you want to be and associate accordingly.
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Transforming Tension
The best creative work creates tension.
It creates tension for you and for your audience.
Tension is a sign that change is occurring, and change is uncomfortable.
When you feel the most compelled to run away or to seek distraction, you are exactly where you are supposed to be.
In this moment, you have a choice to either lean in or to look away.
The role of the creative is to lean in.
It is…
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An Exercise In Compassion
When someone criticizes you, take time to reflect on how they may be right.
If not, you will have missed an opportunity to grow.
Even if they are wrong, consider the fact that they may not be.
Imagine what they see and think that makes them feel this way.
Treat it like an exercise in compassion.
There is no point in trying to change their mind.
Simply consider how you can be better than you…
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Confronting Dedication
As you move toward your goals, obstacles will arise in your path.
These obstacles exist to challenge you.
They will force you to confront your dedication.
If you are looking for a reason to turn back, you will have many such opportunities along the way.
A worthwhile pursuit is never convenient.
You must decide before you begin that your purpose is more important than your comfort.
The…
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Pulled Away
If you feel called to something, it will create tension in your life.
Your calling will pull you away from who you are and even who you thought you wanted to become.
It will put you at odds with your previous goals and even some of your current relationships.
Not everyone will understand your new direction.
You may not even fully understand it yourself.
Your task is not to understand, but to…
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Gentle Strength
You do not need to sacrifice your gentleness in order to be strong.
True strength is not rigid or forceful.
It is flexible and adaptable.
Under enough pressure, that which is rigid breaks.
That which is overly forceful is resisted in kind.
True strength bends without breaking, is persistent without being forceful, and adjusts as needs require.
Do not sacrifice your gentleness in order to be…
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Objectionably Authentic
Telling people you are a jerk doesn’t excuse your being a jerk.
You don’t get a pass simply by calling yourself out.
Admitting your behaviors are objectionable doesn’t give you an excuse to continue behaving that way.
Authenticity is alright to a point, but not if it means being an authentically unkind person.
It may be inauthentic to be kind when you don’t feel like it, but it is also good…
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Serve Who They Are
What you needed and what you need may be different from what others need from you.
Everyone is not like you.
By assuming they are, you are limiting your ability to be of service.
Your task is to serve others as they are, not to serve who you were or are.
To the best of your ability, be who they need.
This will require a lev of empathy and compassion that you may not be accustomed to.
It…
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Stand Out
The world does not need more people who follow along.
We don’t need more of the same.
We need leaders, innovators, and free thinkers.
If you don’t fit in, that is a good thing.
Stand out, make some noise, and make a difference.
It will be lonely at first, but you will be lonelier conforming beneath your potential.
Lead us in a better direction than where we are currently headed.
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A Nervous Decision
If you find yourself unusually nervous about something, perhaps it is important.
Maybe you are nervous because it matters.
Nervousness is a sign that you are either about to do something that is brave or that you will regret.
It is your job to decide which it is and to act accordingly.
Your body does not know the difference.
Your body only knows that you are in danger of changing, and both…
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Everything You’ve Got
While you are worrying about what may be, you are missing what is.
You cannot control what is going to happen.
But you can control what you do in this moment.
You get to decide who you are, how you act, and what you say right now.
Do something that matters.
Be someone you are proud of.
Give this moment everything you’ve got because this moment is everything you’ve got.
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What You Bring
How you feel about the work you do is as important as the work itself.
Sometimes it is more important.
If you bring passion to everything you do, what you are doing tends to matter much less.
Conversely, if you are waiting for your work to make you happy, happiness may perpetually elude you.
At some point, happiness is a decision.
And it is often a decision that must be made in spite of your…
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Wear Your Weird
Don’t be ashamed of who you are.
Your differences make you uniquely you.
That which sets you apart holds the key to your purpose.
No one can be you better than you.
Instead of hiding, highlight your idiosyncrasies.
You will be much happier being yourself than trying to be someone else.
Embrace your weird and wear it proudly.
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Commit To Imperfect
You cannot prepare your way into perfection.
You will never feel completely ready to do something brave.
Once you get to good enough, commit.
Experience is the best teacher.
You will work out the imperfections as you go.
Embrace the tension between success and failure.
That is the line you must walk in order to do anything worthwhile.
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Others Like You
If what you need doesn’t exist, build it.
Create that which you wish you had when you were getting started.
Be the kind of teacher you needed.
There are likely others who are in the same position as you were.
Take what you have learned and use it to help others.
Your experience is your most valuable asset.
Serve the person you were by being of service to others like you.
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Slow Down
You cannot slow life down.
You can, however, slow yourself down so that you live life more fully.
Pay attention to the tasks and the people in front of you.
Life is what is happening now.
Be present to this experience.
Savor this moment and every that follows it.
Life won’t slow down, but you will get more out of it if you do.
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Seek Goodness
Try to love people for the good you see in them.
Of course no one is perfect.
If you look hard enough, you can find a reason to dislike anyone.
Some people make disliking them much easier than others.
But try to look past their flaws to see their innocence, their humanity, and their vulnerability.
If not for their sake, do this for yourself.
By looking for the good in people, you will…
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