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Fifteen immediately changing the TARDIS to warm toned lighting is such a mood

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Thiisss‼️‼️ add to the fact that 14 post bi-generation gets to go and live a nice life with Donna and her family and just chill out and heal. Like you’re telling me Yaz could literally walk past the doctor on the street and have no idea it’s her doctor because they’re presenting as male now. You’re telling me the doctor having just gained access to a relatively normal life wouldn’t IMMEDIATELY GO LOOKING FOR YAZ?? after admitting her feelings for her but telling her the reason they can’t be together is because love just isn’t a thing the doctor is allowed to let herself do because people get hurt. But if she were to love someone. It’d be Yaz.

I truly love lesbian Yaz but let’s not forget the writers tried to do a weird thing with her and Ryan in earlier seasons before pivoting off it, so it’s entirely possible Yaz is pan or bi or just.. into the doctor no matter the gender presentation.. and the whole thing about them deciding not to do a kiss between her and Yaz because “it’s more tragic if they don’t”…it just reads as a fickle excuse not to give the doctor a same sex partner I cannot lie.. because then it’s explicit that the doctor is gay even though it’s always been implied that the doctor is fluid (in every aspect of gender and sexuality)

Plus if they wanted to go for a whole tragic “couple that never could be” vibe then why didn’t they have newly regenerated 14 (post the giggle) go and find Yaz and explain that they can actually be together now and have Yaz be the one to say no because she’s learned ((through her travels with the doctor!!!)) that she is in fact a lesbian!! And now that the doctor is male presenting again.. it wouldn’t work out. That to me is infinitely more tragic than ‘no don’t let the two girls kiss’. It would give so much more closure to the doctor and Yaz’ relationship too.

it just aggravates me that when the doctor admitted his feelings for rose,, they found a way (in one way or another) for rose and her doctor (ish) to be together. And here yaz is, desperately in love with the doctor and the doctor ADMITS THAT SHE HAS FEELINGS FOR HER TOO but it’s never mentioned again.

I keep seeing things about POTD today and I know it’s just how the show works, cause Yaz couldn’t be a companion forever (though she is in my mind :P), but.. Yaz’s departure just makes me so mad.. like fuming.. “Ok I’m regenerating! Welp, guess this is the end of the line with my Best Friend! Who’s life mission is saving people and is so great at it and whom I finally learned to be truly open with and who just learned how to fly the TARDIS and who, again, is my best friend in the world! Well, bye Yaz! Imma go do my thing with someone else! Just cuz! See ya never!” The Doctor literally would not do that. Honestly I would have rather Yaz died. jesus christ. (ok maybe not die, cuz ouch,, but anything else than what we got..)

#the doctor #doctor who #thirteenth doctor #jodie whittaker #yazmin khan #fourteenth doctor #14th doctor #13th doctor #bigeneration #donna noble #doctor who sixtieth #sixtieth anniversary #the giggle #thazmin #tardis #david tennant

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clara oswald is the only doctor who character who could have made torchwood MORE fucked up

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Bengiyo's Queer Cinema Syllabus

Hello! After a holiday hiatus, I am returning to @bengiyo's queer cinema syllabus. We will be ringing in the new year with Unit 4: Heartbreak Alley, the totally light-hearted, definitely not agonizing section of the syllabus where I get to watch countless acts of violence be committed against queer people. That fuck I have Lesbians waiting for me at the end of this unit. The films in Unit 4 are: Bent (1997), Strange Fruit (2004) [cannot for the life of me find this film], Boys Don’t Cry (1999), Brokeback Mountain (2005), Parting Glances (1986), Philadelphia (1993), The Living End (1992), Holding the Man (2015), Jeffery (1995), and Boys on the SIde (1995)

Today I will be writing about 

Brokeback Mountain (2005) dir. Ang Lee

[Run Time: 2h 14 min, Lang: English] 

Summary: “Ennis and Jack are two shepherds who develop a sexual and emotional relationship. Their relationship becomes complicated when both of them get married to their respective girlfriends.” -imdb

Cast: * Jake Gyllenhaal as Jack Twist *Heath Ledger as Ennis del Mar (Rest in Peace)

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Okay, so unsurprisingly Brokeback Mountain is one of seven of the movies on this syllabus that I had seen before I embarked on this project. I watched it for the first time in 2021 and walked away from it with two images in my head: Jack and Ennis’ reunion kiss and Jack getting his face bashed in with a tire iron. This film is in Heartbreak Alley for a reason and that’s because it is fundamentally depressing as fuck. Jack and Ennis are stuck in unhappy marriages, lonely all their lives, struggling to carve desire out of a life that does not let them have it. Ennis ends up alone, and Jack ends up dead and these things are important. Ennis slipped out of his role as attentive father and doting husband the second Jack walked back in to his life, Jack kept breaking his own heart by daring to dream of the life that he wanted. 

A life he was denied. 

I want to mention these tragedies up front because I want primarily to talk about something else in this film. But i do not want to just push past the violence here. This is probably something other people have heard, it was definitely something I was told by the person who recommended this film to me the first time. But the way Jack dies, the way Earl dies, these are both similar to the way that Matthew Shepard died. Matthew Shepard was kidnapped, pistol whipped, tortured, and tied to a fence in Wyoming for being gay and was so brutally beaten his entire face was covered in blood. Jack was beaten to death with a tire iron on the side of the road, Earl was brutally tortured and left in a ditch. These men are not just killed, but brutally, violently, torturously murdered for being queer. 

That said, this movie felt so different to me the second time I watched it and I am so amazed to see how much I truly missed my first time around. I was younger, freshly queer, and did not have anywhere close to the extensive queer media viewing history I do now. It is wild to me to see how I have grown in my engagement with media after spending a year writing about body language. Because this film is so fucking brilliant, like legitimately intelligently crafted in it’s displays of gay politics. Maybe this is stuff that I picked up on subconsciously the first time through because I never found the movie boring despite it being rather slow. But this time? My brain was buzzing at how expertly crafted the dialogue and body language was around trying to be safe while being queer. 

I am thinking of the way that Jack sizes Ennis up at the beginning, Jack’s posture as he leans against his truck the first time they meet. I’m thinking about the line “Mr. Augirre’s got no right making us do something against the rules” when you consider that queerness is very much against the rules at that time and in that place. The way Ennis refuses to let Jack be gentle with him at first, tending his own wounds, staying distant and quiet, until he doesn’t.

Maybe it’s just because of how much I’ve watched The Sign drift further away from the hyper-masculinity aspect of their story, but I could not stop thinking about the delicate dance that is required to navigate the growing feelings and sexual relationship between these two extremely masculine men. I started looking and I think there are about three times in the entire movie where Jack and Ennis are soft with each other. The first is on Brokeback the second time they have sex, and Ennis is struggling and just rests his head on Jack’s chest before going in for a kiss. The second is when they are cuddling in bed at the motel after their first reunion. The third is the scene after Ennis tells Jack he won’t be able to see him again until November. That’s it. Otherwise they aren’t touching, or when they are touching they are rough, rough housing, rough kissing, rough fucking it doesn’t matter. 

Ennis says he isn’t queer and Jack says he’s not either, but they fuck and then they are drawn to one another for the rest of their lives, because there is no one who could get it like they do. Ennis isn’t lying when he tells Jack that is the most he’s spoken in a year. Ennis is a lonely man. Ennis is a rural, hyper-masculine rancher he does not have emotions, not anymore, if he ever did. Whatever conscious or subconscious queerness he had undoubtedly shriveled and died the day he was shown Earl’s body. And that, I think, is part of why Ennis is just constantly drawn to Jack, why his face lights up when he sees Jack, why he throws such caution to the wind upon their first reunion. 

Ennis does not need words for Jack to understand him. Jack is also a rural, hyper-masculine rancher. He gets it in a way that Alma never will. The violence they bestow upon each other, Jack understands why Ennis would lash out. The need to escape in to the mountains, Hack understands why Ennis needs it. It’s just so smartly written. Ennis so unmoored from his own feelings that his body physically rejects them when he and Jack separate for the first time. The way he has to suck it in, suck it up, pretend like he’s unfazed, unaffected, until the minute he has a chance to be out of eyesight, and then he just collapses retching, sobbing, punching walls. 

And then he’s able to separate himself from his emotions once more, he marries Alma, he stays lonely, he does his duties, until Jack comes calling. I think I remember a story about how the first kiss that Heath and Jake have when Ennis and Jack are reunited, their faces slammed together so hard one of them almost broke a nose. And that is how 90% of Ennis and Jack’s relationship is. Those emotions come back and then Jack is leaving again, and Ennis just starts to crumble. 

I could not stop thinking about the dialogue in this film Mr. Aguirre’s carefully chosen words when he is telling Jack exactly why he isn’t hiring him for another season, the way Jack tries to suss out if the man sitting next to him at the bar after the rodeo is queer and down to fuck, how that man picks up on it, rejects him, and how quickly Jack gets the fuck out of the bar afterwards. The inherent understanding of what being invited to the cabin means in that conversation with David Harbor’s character. GOD, it’s just so well done. 

Favorite Moment 

To continue on the subject of incredible code work in this movie, my favorite scene is when Ennis goes to visit Jack’s parents to try to get Jack’s ashes so he can spread them on Brokeback Mountain. How without ever saying anything directly, Jack’s parents are able to convey that they know the reason Jack died, what Jack and Ennis were to each other, and that they accept Jack and accept Ennis was just beautiful. The way she lets Ennis go up to Jack’s room, Ennis finding the shirts, stained with blood because that’s what it is to be queer, Jack’s mother letting Ennis take those with him, Jack’s father saying: “We’ve got a family plot. He’s going in it.” as Ennis is about to walk out the door, Jack’s mother saying: “You come back and see us again” and not have either of those things feel like a threat or a trap? It was incredible. 

Favorite Quote

Hmm, I know we have the two famous quotes, but it’s hard to pick a favorite line because there is so little dialogue in this film considering it is over two hours long. I think I am going to go with the last line of the movie:

“Jack, I swear”

Cause it made me cry. Alma Junior pays a visit to her father to let him know she’s getting married, and she drives away forgetting her coat, and Ennis opens his closet (intense staring at the visual commentary) and he buttons the top button of Jack’s shirt, and he swears to Jack and to me that feels like a wedding vow. 

Score 

10/10 This film is gorgeous, just utterly beautiful all around. The cinematography, the script, the commitment and the care the actors give to these characters, to the subject. I am so glad this was on the syllabus so I had this opportunity to revisit this film. I got a whole lot more out of it as a result.

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Dont care + didnt ask + i am flame + i am fire + i am destruction, decay and desire

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Jack Wolfe as Gabe Next to Normal, London (Donmar Warehouse)

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what a niche merging of my interests, thinking about this forever actually.

“What does it feel like when you’re dancing?” “How do you feel when you sing?”

Billy Elliot (2000) dir. Stephen Daldry // CODA (2021) dir. Sian Heder

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relapsed. ( watched billy elliot again )

#billy elliot #billy elliot movie #jamie bell #billy elliot live #west end theatre #i can’t be normal about this #best film ever made

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reblog this if you believe in loser remus who loves his boyfriend and isn’t a dick towards him supremacy so i can follow you and curate the content i engage with

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guys can we please bring back the old Remus 😭

like the Remus who's a very sarcastic book worm that swears a lot, the Remus that loves learning but gets into more than his fair share of trouble (but no one suspects him), the Remus that seemed all cold and better than everyone else but is really soft and kind when you get to know him

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... skin?

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Remus is that one teacher that has a wife and kids at home and no i will not elaborate

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Autumn leaves falling down like pieces into place and I can picture it after all these days. 🍂🍂 | Wolfstar | Inktober, day 21.

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more panels!

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WHAT?!!! there’s more?!!

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THISSS ‼️ All the young dudes ruined remus’ character sorry about it 🤷🏻‍♂️ like don’t get me wrong I enjoyed the story to a degree but.. after that fic suddenly remus was this dark, angry nasty guy and treated his friends like shit under the guise of ‘being sarcastic/dry’? like no y’all just made him mean?? and now In all the art I see he’s got a MULLET?? loads of tattoos and a million piercings and wears massive platform boots and is fighting anyone who looks at him wrong like.. i don’t wanna say y’all are projecting bc he’s ur fave but.. ur projecting. Remus is a complicated character, and he’s been through the ringer of trauma sure but I really think y’all have completely lost the character along the way and I really do think it started with all the young dudes. (The arts good, but it’s just not remus)

And the same goes for Sirius now he’s some sort of lap dog (haha) for remus and follows him round like a lost child and just takes any nastiness from remus lying down without complaint bc “he’s obsessed with him” like, what?? At what point in any version of sirius’ character would he just accept his friends treating him like shit bro has the strongest sense of justice I’ve ever seen, 😭😭 why all of a sudden is sirius some sort of wet tissue

And don’t come at me with “people can headcanon characters whatever way they like!!” because I literally don’t care, you can imagine them whatever way you like, and I can come on here and say I don’t agree. it’s just something I’ve noticed recently and I’m here to say …ion like it

and don’t even get me STARTED on jegulus and “the slytherin skittles” ???

i’m about to start sharing my whack ass opinions about this fandom cause i am depressed and have no fucks left to give

here’s the first one: people who think that remus is some gay mastermind who had all his shit figured out are delusional fr.

like we’re all delusional here don’t get me wrong and everyoen can have their own headcanons but like… you think REMUS confessed to SIRIUS?!! be for real

when shit gets tough he canonically runs like a bat out of hell.

and you know what. good for him.

let remus be a sad damp loser again. let him run from his problems. let him be flawed and stupid and a teenager. i miss him.

#remus lupin #wolfstar #marauders #marauders era #sirius black #the marauders #the marauders era #harry potter #james potter #regulus black

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i’ve seen relationship therapists and psychologists analyse hermione and ron’s relationship and conclude that they wouldn’t work out in the long run. they’ve argued for hermione to be with harry, krum, even DRACO (don’t understand how a counsellor can vow for canon dramione but alright) as an alternative partner for hermione since ron is “too insecure” to be with her and match her intelligent prowess or what have you.

i seriously don’t understand this sentiment. ron and hermione genuinely seem (almost) perfect to me, maybe not in the movies (a common denominator of people who don’t like romione is that they always cite evidence from the movies, since the films took a lot away from ron’s character and his growth), but definitely in the books.

looking at ron’s insecurities, a lot of people dredge his inferiority complex up to toxic masculinity primarily, when it was more explored how it was an effect of his home life (not gonna argue toxic masculinity wasn’t a factor, they’re teenagers in the 90s written by a pretty misogynistic woman so…). he was the youngest son out of how many children? all of his older brothers were brilliant in some way. bill was an extremely gifted spellcaster, charlie was gifted with magical beasts, percy’s academic score was unmatched, and fred and george (despite their trouble) were entrepreneurial inventor-geniuses. ron, on the other hand, was quite literally born a disappointment to his mother, who conceived him specifically because she wanted a daughter, whilst ginny was born her favourite (though, even then, ginny was gifted at quidditch). ron was mediocre in every sense of the word, and his two best friends were harry (one of the most famous wizards) and hermione (the smartest witch of her age yada yada). and i’ve seen people argue that harry was more welcomed by molly into the weasley household than ron ever was. this isn’t even mentioning the amount of bullshit he copped for being poor (people always downplay the blow to confidence being in poverty can have on a person who is constantly surrounded by people who not only have more, but look down on him for simply being unlucky as to not have what they do).

so yeah, ron was an envious kid, but he was that way not because he was an evil patriarchal conception but because he was lowkey neglected. and even then he was overall an extremely devoted and loyal friend to both harry and hermione, because he did genuinely love them.

there were many moments of ron standing up for hermione that was cut from the films, not as a guy who was romantically interested in her, but as a friend. ron arguing with snape for making hermione cry is one of my fav scenes in the books ru kidding me, and in the movies he AGREED with snape RU KIDDING ME. not to mention how ron was a sobbing violent mess when hermione was getting tortured in the last book, whereas he wasn’t nearly as bothered in the films. and the films cut out harry being a dick to ron about his familial concerns (in dh), so when ron left it seemed like a random dickish move over his jealousy towards harry and hermione’s relationship.

there’s also a million moments where they minimised ron’s usefulness in the books for comedic purposes (forbidden forest with aragog, troll scene, devils snare scene) so ron seems dumber than he is. like, he’s actually smart and a really good spellcaster…. in the books.

so simply by stating this most of the arguments against romione become void. “he’s too stupid/weak for her” simply not true. “he’s a terrible friend who doesn’t stand up for her” also not true. “he’s too insecure to have made a move on her,” yes, but given the context i don’t think people would freak on about ron’s upbringing, i think many would be more understanding, especially considering his growth. even if he wasn’t insecure, hermione is beyond incredible and is bound to make anyone nervous when pursuing her (not an excuse for ron to act like a dick, but it does explain a lot where the movies don’t). “they argue too much” they bump heads, none of the arguments they have are actually super damning, with the exception of ron leaving in deathly hallows.

maybe i’ve covered everything (excluding the abhorrent amount of classism that clouds people’s judgments around how they view ron when harping about how hermione deserves better? hopefully).

now, i know people won’t like me mentioning the cursed child, but i’m going to considering we actually get an insight of their life as a longterm married couple there. a lot of ron stans hated how ron was the only character that wasn’t doing something incredible. harry was head of the aurors, ginny was a famous quidditch player retired to a famous journalist, neville was a hogwarts professor, hermione was quite literally minister on magic. and ron…. ran the joke shop with george.

and i think this was almost the perfect route to go down for ron. because he was average, and was perfectly fine with just being average. hello?? that speaks leagues of growth for his character. he’s supportive of hermione’s work, he grounds her when she gets too caught up in being the literal president of wizarding society, and he still viciously defends her, minister or not. in fact, he’s proud to simply be known as hermione’s husband because he doesn’t feel the need to prove to anyone else his worth. the people he loves most know his worth, hermione never downplays or underestimates him, they are complete equals in the relationship in every single way that matters. they kept ron’s best qualities whilst making him seem more of a healed person. they work so well as a married couple without it seeming like mischaracterisation (not to mention the cursed child literally shows how those two are in love in every reality, so there quite literally can’t be a better partner for hermione or ron according to canon).

so i really don’t understand how professional relationship counsellors can go online and denounce it. probs because they only watched the movies, but it’s 2023 and ron stans should not STILL be fighting for their lives trying to defend him from people who simply don’t consume media with as much depth (which is fine, but one should clarify if they’re talking about the movies because i’ve seen people state they’re talking about the hp BOOKS when it’s simply just…. the films). anyways. romione on top, thanks to coming to my ted talk.