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but not $21 worth

#what? world? is? this?

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This is the closest thing to Lizzy and Darcy in real life I have ever seen.

#Pride and Prejudice #Lizzy/Darcy #the lbd #the lizzie bennet diaries

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Your phone is bleeding.

oh you're in a horror film/book and your phone died/has no bars? how boring. I think phones in horror SHOULD work. they should ding only to have the protagonist check and find nothing. they should get calls from somebody you don't know but is still somehow in your contacts. google maps should lead you to one place, no matter what address you type in.

phones are such a big part of our daily lives, removing them from horror removes the horror from our experience. what if the horror felt like it could happen to you, right here, right now? what if it felt like it was already happening?

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Someone please caption this. What's going on with the guy in the back?

#despots and the guy in the back #does he approve? #does his neck hurt? does he smell something?

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#fronds #frands #freends

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When I lived in Santa Fe, at the fin de siècle, the camping store near the Palace of the Govs had this sign. I think thousands of small outfitters have probably used it. And I love it every single time. This show is full of tiny things that are easy to miss, like this sign.

#Deadloch

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sometimes a comfort show is a black comedy about small town serial killers and the 40-something disasters that hunt them down

#Eddie is the Oscar Madison of this odd couple #Deadloch #she has the most mazing case of toxic masculinity from working with misogynistic assholes

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I first read “if you were lazy you would be having fun” on your blog and it has genuinely been a life-changing piece of advice for me and my friends - I’ve said it to like four of my other executive dysfunction judies and without fail it earns a ten second silence followed by a single revelatory “fuck”

My dad and I actually ran into the speech language pathologist who told me that over 20 years ago at a town hall a few months back—she is retired now, but still advocating for disabled students at IEP meetings and being a nuisance to school administrators. I thanked her for everything, and she was delighted to hear that I was passing her words along to other people who needed to hear them!

#as someone who could not be diagnosed until her forties I want to weep #too smart to be learning disabled #but too lazy to live up to my potential #if will had been the problem I would have triumphed #adhd

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DEADLOCH: Ex-FBI profilers and New Mums. What can't they solve? Who knows? Meanwhile these two detectives and their constable referred to as "copettes" by the commissioner of police get it done. The male cops turn into a Key Stone Kopz/Benny Hill extravaganza at one point and that thrilled me.

sidebar #1: Also this show decided to have an army of red herrings and I could not figure out the killer. I'd take the bait and feel stirrings of certainty and then switch to someone else and someone else. (btw the venereal term really is an army of herring.)

sidebar #2: Dulcie is a beautiful pillar of quiet sarcasm and resigned dismay. She's honestly one of my favorite female characters of all time. She lives at 75 Scylla Street at the corner of Charybdis Road.

postscript: This show was created and written by two women, one with a baby, and the minor character who is a new mom is the most competent character in the entire show.

The director wrote a thesis on the word cunt as used in Australia for Amazon so they could use the word as much as they felt they needed to. It's really not quite the same way it's used in the US. It can be super offensive, but it can almost be affectionate like calling someone "my bitch." The context and tone are important.

p.s. the season is 8 episodes. If you watch it, I rec you go back and watch at least the first five minutes of the first episode. Your head will explode.

#deadloch 18//7 because I gotta sleep some time. #I love Abby #Big Eyes #she has some of the best lines and delivery in the show

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Hey you - yes you! Watch Deadloch: it's an Aussie crime/mystery/dark comedy with lots of lesbians and the most creative curses and insults you've ever heard.

#don't leave me in here alone #if you like femisist buddy cop crime shows this is for you #omg they wrote a cunt manifesto to explain to Amazon why the show has the word so many times #but they don't use it the same or rather Aussies seem to use it with more nuance?

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Do you guys know about Deadloch on Amazon Prime? It’s an Aussie crime drama. Two female cops, one of them is gay (and the straight one is played by a lesbian), investigating gruesome murders in a town that’s “being overrun by gay women.” Also, fans of foreign editions of Taskmaster will enjoy seeing Madeleine Sami and Nina Oyama in main roles!

So if you’re keeping track, that’s three women as the main cast, and all three actresses are LGBT. 

It’s very bleak but also very funny. Worth checking out!

#sorry I'm now a Deadloch appreciation blog

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I think they could be friends.

I got a marketing email from hobbycraft to say that they're now selling plush pumpkins ahead of halloween

so of course I went to the website, which led me to this delightful photo series showing the different sizes available:

I love and support this man and his pumpkin collection

#large veg

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small birb. big birk.

Piping Plover chicks

Meaghan Garrahan

#hello nature I am in you

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Excuse you? What are all those fucking zeroes?

cd has a hole. record has a hole. casette has 2 holes. streaming? zero holes. i think i’ve made my point

#binary has holes

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Not to put too fine a point on it, but my early relationships were unimaginatively fraught and this both hits nerves and awes me with the author's committment to sparkle motion.

#Kalfka

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She also showed her view of the pool in a snap in which she appeared to be lounging on a pool chair. Her legs could be visible as well as the wide pool. In another video, she showed her black slippers along the pool's edge.

If anyone has the option to make her legsand pool visible or invisible it's definitely Simone Biles. (x)

My god, people magazine, who wrote this convoluted copy? Who failed to edit it?

#reading nytimes about coming summer trends #married girl summer #I can definitely do married girl summer #I mean #I was doing married girl summer before all y'all heard of it #it's true that no one in the cosmos was doing married girl summer before 2005 #9 days to bionic hip #my bionic hip will let me do cool things like walk and pivot #I might even be able to save a kitten from a low to medium height tree branch

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I've gotten requests to update the dead links. I was able to find most of them by googling the story titles. Some are now e-books for sale. Vaya con dios. You can try searching via the wayback machine? idk.

Pride and Prejudice fanfic recs

UPDATED MAY 29, 2023

Originally posted 2011:

I’ve noticed a lot of Lizzie Bennet Diaries people looking for fic. There isn’t that much for LBD, but hopefully that will change. In the mean time if you are looking for Lizzie/Darcy fic I can make some recs.

I kind of went nuts last year and read every Pride and Prejudice fic I could find. I read Regencies. I read modern AUs. I read everything I could find online. I only read one “published” pastiche and it was so bad. SO BAD. ERIN, I BLAME YOU.

NB: Many of these pages have HIDEOUS yellow or brown backgrounds or layouts. You can use an add-on like Color that Site for firefox. There are probably plugins for other browsers.

UPDATED 7/17/2015 5/29/23

A Most Convenient Mishap, Complete, Darcy/Elizabeth, Rated R, Regency

This was the first P&P fic I read and I found it delightful. It’s pretty standard Lizzy and Darcy have to get married right away (i.e. before they’ve fallen in love) because of an impropriety. But I was excessively diverted.

Happenstance, Complete, Darcy/Elizabeth, Rated R, Regency (TRY THIS LINK)

Another Darcy and Lizzy must get married right away fic and then learn to love each other, despite his massive and eternal hard on for her. I cannot get enough fics liks this. They are like candy. This one is pretty damn good. Not perfect, but good.

When Duty Calls Complete, Darcy/Elizabeth, Rated R, Regencyv (Has been published as an eBook on Amazon etc.)

When Mr. Collins proposes and Mrs. Bennet tries to make Lizzy accept she runs out of the house and hides. Darcy (who is already very taken with her) finds her and helps her hide, but smooches her and they are seen so they have to get married. LA! Delicious candy.

Life is Better with Animals/ Incomplete, Darcy/Elizabeth, Rated R,

Modern Day AU Lizzy is a vet and Darcy is a neurosurgeon. No, I’m not kidding. Now with 50% more yearning Darcy. (although incomplete it’s like 27 chapters long.)

Eye of the Beholder, Complete, Darcy/Elizabeth, Rated G, Regency AU

Darcy is blinded while hunting at Netherfield and this is a little like Jane Eyre mixed liberally with P&P. (It says WIP on the site, but the story is complete.) This is super angsty Darcy.

As Fate Would Have It Complete, Darcy/Elizabeth, Regency AU, Rated R IDEK PEOPLE. Available as e-book, I think

This story has some major flaws, but I enjoyed it anyway. Lizzy and Darcy are alone and injured and have to spend the night in a hut together, which means… DUN DUN DUN They have to get married early on in their relationship.

Mr. Popularity, Incomplete, Darcy/Elizabeth, Modern Day AU, Rated PG?

This one is so weird. Lizzy is a marine biologist. Darcy is Mexican and runs a large Mexican foods company. He builds his house next to Lizzy’s and she goes bonkers. There is a lot that is entertaining and original about this fic, but wow was it also weird and at times mind boggling. The not being finished is deeply unsatisfying here.

A Long Road to Happiness Complete, Elizabeth/Darcy, Regency AU, Rated PG

Florid writing and I can’t even remember why I rec’d this. There’s no summary. Swim at your own risk.

What We Did on Our Holidays Complete, Darcy/Elizabeth, Modern AU, Rated NC-17 MAYBE THIS ONE FOR SALE

Elizabeth and Darcy are both single parents to teenagers and meet on holiday in Spain. I love this fic so much. OMG SO MUCH. It’s delightful. The kids are awesome.

And Very Impolitic Too, Complete, Darcy/Elizabeth, Modern AU, Rated R LOST FIC. If you find it please message me with the url and I will update. :)

Takes place in The Hague. Lizzy is a Dutch MP and Darcy is a British MP and they meet at a conference. Darcy doesn’t really seem that in character, but I don’t think I cared that much. If it’s going to bug you–then maybe skip. I don’t mind if my characters are interpreted differently fic.

Times of the Season, Complete, Darcy/Elizabeth, Modern AU, Rated PG-13 LOST FIC. If you find it please message me with the url and I will update. :)

Lizzy is a horticulturist trying to take over her family’s messy nursery and Darcy is an FHA inspector trying to prevent an outbreak of disease. Takes place in Vancouver. Pretty good.

A Singular Proposition, Complete, Elizabeth/Darcy, Regency AU, Rated R Available as an e-book now.

Jane is forced to marry Mr. Collins and Darcy takes Lizzy on as a paid companion for his sister. It’s all very dramatic, but still enjoyable.

Strange Bedfellows, Incomplete (but 31 chapters), Darcy/Elizabeth, Regency AU, Rated R AVAILABLE AS E-BOOK NOW

Elizabeth has one older brother and that’s it. No sisters. He’s a student at Cambridge, where Mr. Bennet is a professor. Darcy and Jamie Bennet are close friends until they learn that their fathers have arranged a marriage between Darcy and Elizabeth, who is only 13 when she learns about it. There is a duel, and Jamie must join the army and flee to India to avoid scandal. Lizzy is left all alone when her father dies a few years later and she is sent to Pemberly to live. Her first meeting with Darcy there doesn’t go well and it’s refreshing to read a fic where Darcy is not immediately in love with Lizzy. This one is really well done, except it’s missing a last chapter or two. It’s still highly readable as Lizzy and Darcy are together before it cuts off.

Action and Reaction, Complete, Darcy/Elizabeth, Modern AU, Rated NC-17 Available as e-book

This might be my favorite modern AU. It takes place in Ottawa. Lizzy works for the government and Darcy works in publishing.

The Luxury Gap Unfinished but insanely long contemporary AU, Rated R (but probably NC-17)

It takes place in Seattle and there are long wandery passages about Seattle and things that I skip on rereads, but are good on the first read. Lizzie is a costume designer for Opera. Darcy is a corporate guy gunning to be CEO of his family’s company. The tension and differences between them are really great. This whole thing is a super fun read. It does not really follow the P&P plot arc, but it doesn’t matter. It’s annoying that it’s unfinished, but you can read it without dying of curiosity about whats going to happen at the end. NB: This sucker is 900 pages long in pdf and it will EAT YOUR FUCKING FACE.

I have the PDFs if you can’t find it online. And seriously how can you not want to read about a Darcy who went through a goth phase in high school and listened to The Sisters of Mercy???!!!

An Unexpected Song, Incomplete (but updated in 2015 and 77 chapters), Modern AU, Rated R NOW COMPLETE 2023!

Darcy is a concert pianist and old money New Yorker. Lizzy is a music teacher at a conservatory in California. This is pretty epic.

The Muse, Complete, Contemporary, Rated R, but now an e-book. (If you have Kindle unlimited you can read it for free.)

Darcy is maniacal and famous ballet dancer. Lizzy and Jane are dancers. If you’ve ever taken serious ballet–or understand the culture. OMG.

Here are the AO3 stories for Lizzy/Darcy that are rated Explicit. Have not read either, but Siria gets a blanket rec from me.

Here are the ones rated Mature. Have not read yet.

IT SHOULD GO WITHOUT SAYING THAT IF YOU HAVE NOT WATCHED THE LIZZIE BENNET DIARIES-YOU SHOULD. THEN I CAN REC YOU A MILLION OTHER FICS.

Bonus Mary rec:

I’ll Write you in Harmony in C from ladyofthelog. This is a Mary Bennet fic. It’s pretty good and nice to see a Mary fic.

#shine on you crazy diamonds #pride & prejudice #fanfic recs #this post was originally on livejournal??!!