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Dave: I’m quick at math.
Lio: Okay, what’s 38 times 76?
Dave: 24.
Lio: That’s not even close.
Dave: But it was quick.
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Cotton: Who wants to start a screamo mariachi band with me?
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Asher: Star Trek is so cool. I wish space was real.
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im wheezing
"scarsy"
IKR shoutout to @cinnamonzor for the latest submission i opened it up the first time and COULD NOT STOP LAUGHING
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Jamack: Kipo’s weakness? Easily distracted by nerd shit.
Jamack: Dave? Fire.
Jamack: Wolf? Can’t act to save her life.
Jamack: Scarsy? Crippling self-doubt mixed with overwhelming hubris-
Scarlemagne: WHOA-whoa-whoa! That’s, like, REALLY personal compared to FIRE!
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Happy equinox! I hope the new season brings you lots of love, growth, and happiness!
thank you anon! a prosperous equinox to you as well <3
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Benson: Dave was banned from the Chicken Shack. We had to go out of town to get some.
Dave: Well, they shouldn’t say “all-you-can-eat” if they don’t mean it.
Jamack: Dave, you ate a chair.
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Benson, at 3 A.M.: Why are any of us here, really?
Mrs. Sartori, having caught him trespassing: I’m asking about you specifically.
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Jamack: I have connections within the furry community that can ruin your life in twenty minutes.
Kipo: Nya!
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Kipo: Great! Barbed wire and a locked fence! How’re we supposed to get in?!
Dave: Throw the wolf girl!
Wolf: The next person to touch me gets bitten.
Dave: Don’t throw the wolf girl.
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Wolf: My friends say I have “emotional issues.” How am I supposed to deal with that?
Benson: Well you have two options: either, a) the Hugo method, or b) the Kipo method, where you just hire a therapist and address what’s wrong with you.
Wolf: ...what does the Hugo method entail?
Benson: Investing in waterproof mascara.
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Dave: Time to use science to see if they’re dead.
Dave, kicking the gilded Mod Frogs: Yep. They’re dead.
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Scarlemagne: I didn’t used to understand why Benson got so emotional over Chopped, but the first episode I watched had a contestant putting caviar in the blender and I clapped my hand over my mouth and screamed.
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Emilia, after injecting herself with megamute DNA: I have superior genes, Kipo. Superior brain power. I can raise and lower my cholesterol at will.
Kipo: Why would you want to raise your cholesterol?
Emilia: So I can lower it.
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Wolf: Isn’t the idea supposed to be "You saved my life, now I owe you a debt?"
Kipo: Nope other way around. You saved my life, so now I’m your problem. If you don’t like it, then kill me.
Wolf: Wait-
Kipo: God wanted me dead, now you get to find out why.
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Kipo: Are you an 'arr' pirate or a 'yo ho ho' pirate?
Troy: I'm an 'I'm not paying $600 for music' pirate.
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Margot: What is wrong with you?!
Wolf: Many, many things! And most of them are your fucking fault!
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