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#can confirm #I have an all white deaf kitty too #missing are the ear drum shattering SCREAMS

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#parenting

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The thing that really let me think in the right way about parenting was realising that raising a good person and raising a "good child" are incompatible.

How can a child develop the ability to challenge and question authority if they cannot challenge and question adults? How can a child learn to value and defend their autonomy if they cannot refuse the demands placed upon them? How can a child learn to fight bigger injustices if they cannot fight over something they feel isn't fair? How can a child learn to be at peace with their emotions and the emotions of others if they are not allowed the freedom to express their emotions without consequence? How can a child learn to listen to and care for their bodies if they are not allowed to sleep when their body asks or eat what their body demands?

Unquestioning obedience is not a good trait. Fear of authority is not a good trait. Always being sweet with a smile on your face is not a good trait. Being unable to create conflict is not a good trait. Being unwilling to fight is not a good trait. Compromising your boundaries is not a good trait. Prioritising pleasing others over your own needs and autonomy is not a good trait.

Good parenting means intentionally making your life harder. A difficult child is a good person. Your job is to guide your child into becoming the best adult they can be. It is not to make your own life easy. It is not to have the approval of others. It is not to make their teacher and grandparents lives easy. Your priority is your child and nothing else.

#yes #and god is this hard when I never learned any of that myself as a child and still struggle as an adult with #I want to raise my child into a better person and I was raised and am trying to become

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my advice for not going insane? try to do something every weekend. go to events, you’ll love events. and not like just hang out with ur friends or go clubbing , no, make a day out of going to some local market by yourself or attend some strange convention event you’ve never heard of. i cannot stress the importance of doing random events on a friday night or saturday or a sunday at r pm for mentally ill people especially if you’re depressed and have been searching for an anchor 2 tether yourself to. attend some events now

#god I wish

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i will die without routine. also this routine is killing me

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And just because it’s not a romantic relationship doesn’t mean it’s not a good relationship 🙃

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#real life #my brother played when i was a young kid and i used to read the books #then i started playing myself when i was 14

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moon snail 🌕

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"you look tired" well the torment is relentless and the horrors never cease

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i love it when you start doing little things different & notice how much you’ve grown as a person just by that. like you from a year ago would not have handled that situation the way you are now. you’ve changed for the better. & that is so satisfying

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so sad that people got sick of "doomed by the narrative" and decided it was cringe, because fate and free will in fiction has been a major interest of mine for like eight years, but alas so it goes. anything that gets popular is destined to become reviled in short order. it's like some sort of unstoppable, uncompassionate, avaricious cycle of rising and falling and rising again. like whatever happens, no matter the intentions, it will always result in the same tragic ending. you could almost say it was d

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I will never get over how weird it feels to have tragic and emotional chapters of your life where you just also still go to work, and the grocery store, and see funny videos online all while feeling such paralyzing fear and heartache

life just goes on no matter what

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#me anytime I say anything about my life

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