insideherownbubble

[insideherownbubble]

Looking back…

I remember the time na si Laki Opring ko is nagreready ng upuan sa harap ng bahay ni Tita ko para sa mga nageevangelism na naglilibot. That time, nagtatago naman talaga ako sa mga yun, pati na rin ang lolo ko. Of course they will talk about faith, God and bible. I was just a kid bu that time and pritority ko is maglaro.

And then fast forward to now. I was just thinking kung buhay pa si Laki, will we converse about God and our faith? How will it be? Ang sarap siguro ng pakiramdam nuh. Na you and your grandpa will talk about how Lord Jesus works on our life.

#lakiopring #faith

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A ‘yes’ not from me nor from him but from both our parents was the best answer to a marriage proposal.

#marriage proposal #marriage #soon to be mrs

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Hooooot!!!!

#jujutsu kaisen 0 #jujutsu kaisen #inumaki toge #tuna mayo #gojou satoru

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Yeah. Cried a river.

#you’ve reached sam #books #book recommendations

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Nag-move on ako from Taming the Waves for 3days. Actually hindi pa talaga ako prepared to start new story of inksteady. Pero nacurious lang talaga ako dito sa isang to. And it almost end me. Yung hindi naman ako depressed pero grabe ako humagulgol. Sobrang mapanakit.

#wattpadrandoms #wattpadstories #inksteady #dosageofserotonin

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Another pair to ruin. Buti pa grades ng mata ko, pataas ng pataas.

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Coincidentally.

#inksteady #wattpadrandoms #wattpadstories #chasingthesun

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Pwede bang nakaschedule ang pagbreakdown? Like, can I do it after two days?

#damn #emotional damage

[insideherownbubble]

Kaya ko pa naman. May choice ba ako?

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Watching and listening to these youtubers ang podcasters makes me want to become one. Ang problema? Wala akong confidence to show my face on cam and I am not as well a good talker. Aside from that, magulo ang utak ko. Ahahaha. So kaloka lang.

[insideherownbubble]

Kaya mo pa gurl?

3 paragraphs

8 minutes

138 words

PS: Corrections were made in our software/platform. Haha.

#deutschlernen #deutschkurs #personal #studies

[insideherownbubble]

As I listen to this song, I realized that it wasn’t really a sin to give up something that isn’t right. Sa part ko, I gave up cause I felt na it was not for me, for us. Walang growth. I felt sorry, yes. Kasi hindi naman maayos ang hiwalayan namin. But I always pray for his healing, for our healing.

Gaya nga ng isa sa linya sa music video ng kanta, “Paano ko ipapaliwanag na nauna na ako sa dulo?” I moved on even when we were still together, kasi siguro nakita ko na yung dulo. Nakita ko na patutunguhan ng relasyon namin. Kahit pa ilang beses ko bigyan ng chance yung relasyon namin, yun pa tin yung navivisualize kong ending namin. For the last months of our relationship, I always ask myself, “Ito ba gusto mong future?” And my answer is always “No.” Ambitious ako eh, madami akong pangarap. And it sucks cause I can’t give up my dreams for him. Siguro kasu hindi ko makita yung future na sasamahan niya ako based sa kung ano ang pinapakita at pinaparamdam niya sa akin. So after praying it over and over, the opportunity came na i-open up ko yung gusto kong ipojnt out sa kanya. And he didn’t listen and I got tired. So I gave up.

Sabi nga ng The Juans, hindi lahat ng unang bumibitaw ay gusto talagang mangiwan sa ere.

#Spotify #the juans #dulo by the juans #life #personal #past relationship #ex

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Simple message but means a lot to me. Pareho kaming busy sa work and not like other days, nabusy din siya ngayon kaya hindi kami nakakapagusap. And I was busy too, like other days. So yun nga. Hindi ko naman expect na magtatanong siya ng ganito siguro kasi nasanay na ako na hindi naman ako tinatanong ng ganito. So yun, ayoko naman icompare pero iba siya sa mga ex ko. And hoping that he will not change.

#jowa and me

[insideherownbubble]

As I continue watching All of Us are adead, I can’t keep on comparing it to the Sewol Ferry tragedy where students died because of mishandling rescue operations, because of lies of some higher ups and because the kids were abandoned. Like the remaining students tried their best to survive and only few tried to rescue them.

Nacompare ko lang talaga siya.

#all of us are dead #sewol ferry tragedy #sewolferry #spring day #bts #choengsan #onjo

[insideherownbubble]

Hindi ko alam kung bakit bigla akong naging emotional nang makapanood ako ng vids about wedding gown. Siguro kasi deep in my heart, gustong gusto kong magsuot nun kahit pa sabihin kong ang gusto ko lang ay civil wedding.

[insideherownbubble]

So, ito nga. I’ve been in a relation ship where we hide things from each other. From our past to our plans. As for me, I wasn’t open because I was not used to it. Yup, so much for being that ‘I-can-manage-myself’ kind of woman. So I end up accepting my partner hiding things from me. Tolerating and ignoring redflags. Waiting for him to give up. But the end result was a mess. Meeting him gives me conclusion that I will not have good future with him. Losyang ang labas ko nun mga be! So I got panicked and even if he learned my secrets, which are transferring work and my own properties, I left him. Not only because of my future but also because of those redflags hitting me on the face. First, he has no desire for work. I guess he used to living in accepting help or support from his loved ones including me. So sa huli ako lang magtatrabaho sya tambay at naglalaro. Second, he has no respect for his mother. That’s one of the biggest redflags I ignored. Third, no good connection with my family. Hindi niya kinausap ang family ko. Hindi man lang niya isinantabi ang hiya niya. Fourth, no plans or hiding plans for our future. He keeps on saying l have plans but no blueprint. Walang plates man lang. wala man lang drawing. Wala. And the last time we talked about our future, he said that I will clean the house when you are not around. So I was thinking, hindi siya magtatrabaho? Fifth, alcoholic and no control of himself when drunk. He always go selfpitying whenever confrontations happen. And so on…

Well, I also have some redflags. Full of secrets, independent, too focused on the future, not open about plans and a lot more.

So, after breaking up with him, I focused on myself. Building myself to be more independent, to be stronger and to be a goal achiever. Reminding myself to be ready whenever someone will come to shake me up. Tipong handa na ako sa panibagong relasyon pero reformed na ako.

And here comes a guy that was introduced to me by the husband of my friend. Reto boy! So we were chatting and getting to know each other with being clear about our intentions. Him knowing me better and will see where it leads us. And that goes the same for me. Malay mo naman siya na diba? Purnada na naman ang aking balak na magforeigner jowa na lang. As time goes by, we became open to each other. His plans, past, ongoing situation and all. The same as me. And he is very supportive with warning. Nope, he’s not letting me do all the things I want to do. He will stop me when he knows that its not right or the decision was something bad. He will call me out when I am doing somwthing wrong but he lets me enjoy whatever I want. He works hard and madiskarte sa buhay. Family oriented and parents first before jowa. And HE ASK PERMISSION FROM MY MOM IF HE CAN PURSUE ME! Kilig ako? Kind of! Syempre sa tanda kong to sinong gagawa nun diba? So, we’ll see what will happen. I don’t even know if I can update this story. Well. Hahaha basta ako kinilig ng konti.

#personal #jojowa ka na naman je

[insideherownbubble]

Having someone who is open to you.

Boy! Sana ikaw na nga! Haha.