ironspiderson
ironspiderson
Online Hobby Store
If someone was pursuing a hobby, they might rather go to a physical location so they could test out the equipment before they buy it, rather than purchasing it online, and then finding out it is not exactly what they wanted. I do not think that is the case however. An online hobby store can provide a hub of information for a particular hobby to let an online shopper or user know the details and find all of the information they want about a particular hobby. At a physical location, they could also talk to people in person about their particular hobby or area of interest. An online store can offer the same possibilities, however, with online forums or chat rooms where hobbyists can share information and meet people who share their interests. With all of that in mind I decided to start an online hobby store. It is called Variety Access. I gave it this name, because I wanted a store that offered a variety of goods and services, or a variety of hobbies and the products needed to pursue those hobbies. One of my favorite quotes is, "Variety is the spice of life." That quote makes sense to me. Would someone not be happier if they fill their life with a variety of the things that they love or enjoy? Sometimes you can have too much of a good thing, so it might be nice to have a variety of good things that you can turn to if you have too much of one. Sometimes, something in some area of your life can unavoidably go wrong, so it is nice to have a variety of other things to fall back on.
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ironspiderson · 37 minutes ago
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I'm so tired of going back to the start (rant)
Everytime I do some progress, I workout, try something new, a week after I get lazy and stop. I know I shouldn't but laziness gets the best of me.
I can't consistently workout, drink water, eat, practice an instrument. I always end up playing video games.
That's another thing - I'm mostly bored of them, it's more of a comfort thing at this point. I'm afraid of doing things.
I know what I need to do, I know how, I just can't. WHY!?! What's wrong with me?
It shouldn't be this way. How is it that I'm aware of this shit, yet I can't escape it?
I want to program, do modeling, play guitar, read books, exercise, but everytime I somehow end up on this goddammed shitty ass website called Reddit. I hate it, but I always come back to it. What the hell...
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ironspiderson · 37 minutes ago
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Helpful Hint: Schedule a specific day of the week to unplug from social media/cell phones!
I've been doing this for a few months now, and there's a lot of benefits. Being able to focus better on hobbies and personal projects, do mindful activities such as meditating and reflecting on goals/progress from week to week. Not to mention, waking up and going to bed with a clear mind! If you have a family, it's a great way to be present and spend time together without distractions.
These are just examples, but you can really do anything. It's YOUR day, every week. Personally, my day is Sunday. It's great because I can be well-rested and feeling accomplished before the week ahead. Whatever day you choose, there should be no social media use or being constantly tied to a device (of course if you need to be available in case of emergencies, keep phone call notifications on). But by putting the cell phone away in a closet or drawer for 24 hours, we can focus more on the life we have right in front of us! (:
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ironspiderson · 37 minutes ago
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Do you think it’s unhealthy that I want to live a life with different and multiple dating experiences?
I (24F) just feel like I’d want to date people (I like of course and have some sort of connection with) but I’d want to for like 6months - a year and then be single for a while and then move on to someone else.
I’m currently in my first long term relationship (5 years) and I love him despite some issues here and there. But it just seems boring (yes that’s the word and I feel bad for thinking that behind my partner’s back) to me to spend all my life with one person. Note that this started happening when my partner stated that he wanted to spend his life with me.
I don’t want to keep on leading him on, and I also don’t want to hurt him while I figure this shit out.
Can someone help me navigate these feelings?
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ironspiderson · an hour ago
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Need a little guidance (Just Graduated)
I feel like im a mediocre student and the thing that I lack the most is focus. I easily get distracted by things around me and thoughts that just pop out of my head. My question is how do you focus and keep yourself from getting distracted.
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ironspiderson · an hour ago
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Self improvement while struggling with severe depression.
Anyone who has dealt with this in the past/currently dealing with it how did you deal manage self improvement?
I don't have anyone to rely on or go to for help really. I'm dealing with low self esteem, self image, eating (at all/just eating junk food), dealing with people better/understanding social situations more accurately, trying new things (I give up the second I'm faced with a difficult things, this is alarmingly bad even by most people's standards)
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ironspiderson · an hour ago
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How do I get into a career despite…?
I recently left work at a restaurant, and I’m looking to find work again. I graduated last year with a bachelors in biochemistry as well as psychology.
Finding work is very challenging mainly because I don’t have a car. I have no contact or support from my family and never bought one since I never learned to drive.
Should I spend some of my savings to get a car and expand my job options? Should I get a bike instead?
Also, I’m worried my degrees are fairly meaningless unless I seek a masters or PhD. Should I maybe go to school again to do that? Or go to a technical school to be an MRI technician for example?
I’m a little lost in life and have no guidance so I’m hoping to talk to some people who might have advice for me. I apologize for the many questions in advance!
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ironspiderson · an hour ago
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How do I stop diminishing my accomplishments?
Hey all, I graduated this year from University with a 2:1 in Law. I remember thinking, before I started Uni, that it would be so amazing to be able to say I had a Law degree, and the reactions from people saying "ooh a law student" certainly consolidated that feeling.
The outcome was something I certainly worked hard for; my first 2 years I averaged a 2:2 and it was far from a guarantee that I would be able to get a 2:1. A first in my dissertation helped bring my final grade comfortably into a mid 2:1, thankfully. However, it was more relief than pride. I am planning on doing a MSc in Finance which is now possible because of the 2:1, and so the 2:1 always felt like the minimum I ought to achieve. I felt, and still feel, as though it's not "good" but merely, average.
I'm not here to try get someone to stroke my tiny cock, but now that I'm on the other side of the degree and I have achieved the outcome for which I worked so hard, it doesn't feel as sweet as I thought it would before graduating.
I don't hold the law degree to as high a regard as I did before I had it - as if my thinking were that: if I can get it, then surely it's not actually that much of an achievement.
How can I start appreciating the achievement for what it is, particularly given my peers who didn't/couldn't get into or complete University.
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ironspiderson · 2 hours ago
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Testosterone and maintaining masculine energy through simple habits
We’ve all seen the advertisements for testosterone boosters, usually geared towards older men. However, maintaining optimal levels of testosterone and health is vital for guys of any age, no matter if they’re in their twenties or sixties.
It’s difficult to project a powerful masculine frame and when the essence of your masculine energy is lower than it can be.
Below are simple steps. They are no substitute for consistent healthy eating, workout and sleep habits. The link between mental health and physical health are undeniable at this point. However, these are some minor actions you can take that yield results
60 push-ups in the morning: 20 out of bed, 20 before shower, 20 before getting dressed fully. Simple way to get in some form of resistance exercise quickly
Drinking water regularly throughout the day. There are even containers and bottles that mark daily recommended amounts
Taking vitamins: I personally take fish oil, Vitamin D, Boron, Green tea extract, Magnesium, Zinc, Iron, and NAC.
Lower intake of alcohol and caffeine, sugar as much as possible
Don’t use phone at least an hour before bed
Never masturbate to porn, masturbate every seven days if you aren’t having sex. Being horny is an energetic, powerful state if channeled properly
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ironspiderson · 2 hours ago
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I want to become the best version of myself
I've started studying a couple of hours everyday and working out and eating healthy. But should I start waking up early? And what else should I do to become the best ever version of myself. Im sick of being a lonely nerd and want to be successful. I have barely any friends. I want to make friends but I dont know where to go or what to do. I want a girlfriend and a better life.
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ironspiderson · 2 hours ago
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How can I learn to accept gifts and not feel overwhelmed?
I don´t know how to accept gifts, I don´t know how to say thank you properly without panicking and getting so nervous
My parents are not great with gifts, we don´t celebrate at all, just barely me and my sibling birthdays which most of the time don´t include gifts but it´s not the case in my bf´s family.
I still regret when my boyfriend offered to get the reversive octopus because I felt ashamed
Today his parents sent me some baked cupcakes because of my birthday and I panicked and started to search for how to say thank you cause I didn´t know
How can I improve? I want to be more natural about this matter cause I´m already an adult and still struggle with it
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ironspiderson · 2 hours ago
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How do I stop binge eating?
I think I must have started binge eating a couple of years ago when I started working and therefore had money to buy snacks and things. I'm 18 and trying to save money for University, but I spend the majority of it on food I don't even need. I eat until my stomach hurts and when I'm not eating I crave food even if I'm full, or I just feel sad and empty, sometimes fidgety and irritated. My home situation isn't good so I wonder if it's a comfort thing and I'm hoping I will have more control over this once I move out next year since I will be able to prepare my own meals. Do you think I should have some therapy for this? I'm worried about it affecting my health or making me gain a lot of weight.
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ironspiderson · 3 hours ago
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Eat Veggies Every Day
An easy self improvement, probably sitting next to drinking ‘x’ amount of water per day
Doing this will genuinely change how you feel, your mood and your appetite
Don’t have to stick with any one kind, Buy frozen packs and make a medley - green beans, broccoli, sweet corn, carrot all in one meal for example
Easy one to practise the discipline of committing to new habits
Best wishes 🥕 🌽 🥦
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ironspiderson · 3 hours ago
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What did you do when you realized you were nothing special?
Not the Golden boy, the gifted one, the one destined to great things.
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ironspiderson · 4 hours ago
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I have been abused and in some way it made me an abuser. I want to know if anyone felt the same and can I become better?
I am not sure how to write this, but I’ll just say it. So my parents are brown and they way they raised me was often hitting me. It didn’t really affect me until I saw a presentation in grade 12, that sent me to a nervous breakdown. We were doing presentation in class on social issues and someone had a slide on how kids who were raised in households where there is spousal abuse or parents hit kids there are xy amount of chances they will do the same. That made me really lose my mind and when I confronted my mom to not to hit me again, she hit me. So I will give you a rundown what happened before that day.
I have seen twice my dad hitting my mom. One time when I was in grade 1, chasing her to the washroom with a stick. I didn’t see what happened but I heard spanking sounds and I was too young to realize. My mom wanted to go to the roof that day but some how I managed to talk her out of it. I didn’t know what suicide was back then, but I felt something was wrong.
Second my parents were fighting intensely, and my mom just made a fist towards my dad and they went back and forth with slapping each other. Worse was my brother was 1 then and they were basically grabbing him as in who owns the ownership of the child.
My mom often hit me. One time during a parent teacher interview my teacher said something to my mom which she interpreted the wrong way so she hit me the entire weekend.
I didn’t get an award during my middle school graduation ceremony so she was mad the entire time and even woke me up to hit me.
She would in several occasions would point a knife towards me in a striking position, which she denies. It took me sometime before I could hold a knife.
She also bit me once, if not twice, and the scars are still there.
I also want to point out I witnessed a lot of violence from my parents, especially my mom, from growing up. Twice she hit maids in our house. One time she kicked a maid so hard for breaking her favourite vase that the maid broker her leg. Another time she hit a maid who was hired to take care of my baby brother. The maid was younger than me and she messed up the hot water by accident and my mom hit her so hard she started crying.
So all those happened, the best I could remember until the point I confronted my mom. I couldn’t remember everything but I did get hit pretty much often until I was 17. Also whenever my parents fought, they always blamed it on me. Even still to this day. And every time I had to interfere, because in my mind i think of that one time they were hitting each other, I just don’t want to see it, so I had to jntervene. And when I do, I get yelled and told not to do because it’s not my business. And when I tell them how it becomes my business because it affects me mentally, she says I am just making it up and just get over it. Anyways back to the confrontation. And since it wasn’t the best confrontation I just stopped talking to her for awhile. But there were also some more emotional or verbal thing she has said that I can’t actually pin point when or how many times she said that but there was a lot, so I’ll just list them out.
She called me a rapist because she was mad and wanted to degrade me. That really left me in shock because it was right after the breakdown I had and all I would hear in my head for days were those exact two words.
She one time yelled at me for not talking to her and she yelled from my door “I will cut your penis off, and grill it on the bbq and eat it.” That made me difficulty eating beef for awhile.
She could call me something very insidious in her language, which I can only define as something like a terrible human being. I just don’t like the sound of it. She also would swear at me that I didn’t like.
She would say something like. “We know you won’t take care of us, and just throw us on the streets.” Neither myself and my brother likes hearing that but she loves saying that. She recently somewhat stopped with it.
She would say you are nothing to me or it was a mistake giving birth to you. That hit me hard and added to my suicide even more. I even asked her during an argument why not get an abortion.
She would also say I am worse than a bug that grows in the garbage or worse than animals on the street.
She would say something like I will go and sleep with another men just to make me get hurt. I know it shouldn’t but it really does. One time just to prove a point she told me “Do you want me to show you how your dad and I made you on the bed?”
One time I was just messing with my brother by hitting him in the stomach and he said stopped doing it because if I don’t I might go rape or assault girls outside. Which when I actually confronted her about she also denied and said she had forgotten. She only accepted it once my brother backed it up.
She would constantly bring up how she is my birth mother and I would never be able to I give birth because I’m a guy and I should be great fun for that. Also the fact that she can hit me or say that because she is my mother and claims how her parents hit her a lot and she didn’t mind that.
Sometimes I did wish would have been better if I just took the beating instead. You know just take it in, because it maybe normal in the culture and just accept it. However, it has made me act up. I never hit anyone because I wanted to or feel powerful, but it came during extreme duress. I will give a run down. It has mostly been towards my mom and usually happens when she starts to berate me or constantly yelling at me. I would ask her to please stop yelling at me or just calm down, but she will double down and will continue to just vent at me no matter what. At that point, I will feel like the walls are closing in on me and I am going back to the time when I would be treated that way and the only way I feel I can get out if I can make her stop screaming so there's been time when I pushed her and in one occasion slapped her because I couldn't just handle it. I also took it out with my dad twice, one time because he was yelling at my mom and I thought he would hit her, so I tapped his shoulder and the other time I grabbed him by his collar.
I do not feel proud at all and I am so disgusted to the fact I even have to write this. I am seeing a therapist for the last 7 months and we are working on this, and the therapist did mention that what has happened to me and how I turned out, even though what I did was not good, but I turned out better than expected. Honestly, I am not sure how to feel when I heard that. I felt a bit good for the fact someone is looking at me and see that i need help and that I am not a monster and I also feel like, why the fuck would you say that to someone who is a monster. All I am asking is do I have hope to be better? Has anyone been in a similar situation? Have you told anyone about this like your friend or your spouse?
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ironspiderson · 4 hours ago
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What do you guys do if you feel so down lately?
Like you feel down about life in general. Idk the exact reason why I feel down though. I just do. And I want to bring myself back up. Got any advice?
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ironspiderson · 6 hours ago
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list some skills
i need help , i want to built some hobbies bt most importantly i want somethin i could spend some tym....so help me and list some hobbies u think is better to have to someone in his mid 20's.
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ironspiderson · 7 hours ago
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How to open a conversation with someone without being cringe?
Recently i want to widen my circle of the people i know, so there are those people who have mutual interests with me so if i wanna open a conversation with them and be more sociable how gonna start it without being akward and cring?!
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ironspiderson · 8 hours ago
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How do I admit that I’m wrong?
when I’m in an argument or discussion with somebody, and I’m wrong on with whatever subject we’re talking about, I feel incapable of saying I’m wrong and instead I try to steer the conversation, argue a bit more, or say that they are in the wrong. How do I admit to being wrong?
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ironspiderson · 8 hours ago
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What does it means to have interest in something?
i have read somewhere that we have to choose career based on our interest.
But I have doubt that there is no such thing as having interest in something.
we all are interested in everything and nothing.
Means to say that there is a spectrum of boredom to interest and each activity falls somewhere on that spectrum.
So what does it means when self help guru or YouTubers giving self help advice says to follow interest .
Shouldnt we talk about how much interest is sufficient to elect something as our career.
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ironspiderson · 9 hours ago
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A Guideline
I posted yesterday and thought about it more. I’ve been on a pretty bad slacking steak this much with taking drugs and playing video games as a means to escape my stress but I’m sick of it. I can only improve if I make a consistent effort in doing so.
No more seeking out weed, no more playing video games as a response to getting frustrated, no more faking out of work to party with friends. Going to actually buy groceries instead of subsiding on one meal from the convenience store. I have to make these changes or I’ll feel bad and gross forever
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