I wonder if people know…
I wonder if people know that sometimes teachers cry themselves to sleep.
Before school starts you spend your own money to buy things for your room and extra school supplies because you know not everyone will have what they need.
During the year you see kids coming down the halls with the same shirt on two days in a row of multiple days the same week. It may or may not have the stains from a previous lunch because it hasn’t been washed.
You do the best you can to teach what is required of you but there are still people who accuse you of making things too hard. You try to spend as much time with every child as you can, but you are only one person. Then you still have people who send or say hurtful things to you because of one thing or another.
I wonder if people know that sometimes you sit in your car and cry or tear up the whole way home because of something that happened that day. You want to “save the world” but find that unfortunately that isn’t realistic, even though you still try.
You have to deal with the fact that sometimes people talk about you in public or on social media and even in front of a child you teach. Kids hear everything.
I wonder if people know how hard it is to stick to your guns when a child comes to you and apologizes after a decision has already been made due to their actions or behavior. You want to just cave, but you also want to teach them that there are consequences for their actions. However, it still hurts when you tell them the decision stands and see the regret on their face. That’s hard.
You worry that you aren’t doing enough to prepare them for “the test” and life after your class, even though you are doing everything you can think of to get the material across in a way that everyone can understand.
You wonder when you go home what that kid that grabs every extra milk or juice that was left on the lunch table is going to eat tonight.
You wonder why that kid says they wish they could go home with you and your kids. It may be nothing or it may be something.
You wonder why people think that you don’t deserve more money for what you do. I mean you are teaching the next generation to read and write and work with numbers and actually think. Hmm…
You wonder if anything you’re saying or doing is even making a difference at all.
I wonder if people know all this runs through your brain all - the - time.