journeytoeuphoria

[journeytoeuphoria]

Welcome to the Journey To Euphoria

This experience is complete with three chapters, Nostalgic Paradise, Evolving Thoughts and Mixed Feelings

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To get started, listen to this nursery rhyme and think about the last time you heard this song, if you have heard it before

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[journeytoeuphoria]

Nostalgic Paradise

I opened my eyes to the blue open skies with the memoirs of my youth behind me. As I turned around, I could barely see the shore I had departed. I felt the slow circular motion of the waves beneath me as I turned around to gaze in the direction I was going. I saw people in rowboats, some made of wood, some made of PVC, some made of aluminum and a few made of fiberglass. They say fiberglass makes for a smoother ride, so I guess I am one of the lucky few.

The sun blocked my gaze, and I could hardly see Mitch waving out to me from a distance. I began rowing fast in his direction. It took me a little while to catch up with him. Once I did, I could keep up easily. Mitch was a little too well-dressed for my taste. We were, after all, taking a trip that would last a lifetime. Everything from his jet black hair neatly kept in a comb-over to his freshly pressed white polo shirt and brown khakis said he knew where he was going. We were the best of friends, separated only by birth and conformity.

“Ray, I see you finally made it,” Mitch called out in a confident voice. “You’re kind of late to the party but, you can have part of my share,” he said as he threw over half of his share of food rations. My boat at the time was barely big enough for me, so it shook with the weight. “This is barely enough to get by for a single person, let alone for us to share.” Mitch was quick to reply as he had always been, “I guess we’ll have to make do until tomorrow. Also, get used to it; we’ve barely made it offshore.” Mitch turned around and glimpsed in the direction of a woman behind us. She was struggling to row her makeshift boat, “You see that lady back there. She’s getting a 10th of what you’re getting. Count your blessings, brother”.

Mitch and I spent the rest of the day talking about all the great memories we would always cherish. I felt the nostalgia, with the feeling growing the more we spoke. I could feel a burning sensation in my chest. I found myself screaming on the inside. Part of me wished I could go back in time. The other part of me was eager for what the future would unfold.

As the sun faded away and the sky grew full of stars, I grew increasingly numb on the inside. I stared through the blanket of boats that stretched for hundreds of miles. We were millions of people rowing away to a place we had never seen. I could feel a fire growing inside of me. We kept rowing onwards, leaving our past further behind us.

[journeytoeuphoria]

"Nostalgia is the hearts way of reminding you of something you once loved. It travels in many forms; on a song, in a scent or in photographs... but no matter how it comes to you it will always have the same bitter-sweet taste"

Ranata Suzuki

[journeytoeuphoria]

Evolving Thoughts

I opened my eyes and saw white sails. They moved across the skyline in the direction of least resistance. I felt the large circular motion of a wave underneath me. I stumbled onto my feet gazing all around. All I could see were boats stretching as far as my vision allowed me to see. I looked at my tiny reflection on the steel metal bar of my defective tiller, taking a mental note of every faint new crease that appeared in my once flawless skin. The water shined beautifully in the sun, but the picture looked all too familiar.

“Hey, I’m Phren.” I turned around with a jolt. I was caught off guard as it was rare for anyone to set foot on a boat that didn’t belong to them. Although I didn’t know what he was doing, or where he came from; I didn’t feel threatened by him in any way. Perhaps it was because he was a harmless-looking elderly man with unruly grey hair and a perfectly grey moustache. He was wearing a buttoned-down shirt held down by a pair of dark brown pants and a black leather belt. His appearance overall was tidy, but not impressive in any way. Phren spoke in a very eloquent and gentle manner.

“What are you doing on my boat?” I asked. “I’m just hitching a ride for a little while. I hope that’s alright with you. I promise I don’t mean any trouble”. At this point in my journey, I was ready to welcome some company. I proceeded to ask some questions about where he came from and his responses sounded very natural. He told me about all of the fascinating adventures he had been on and all the beautiful things he had seen. All I had ever witnessed was the crashing of waves and the occasional shakedown of fellow boaters who had stolen rations from others. The adventures he spoke about challenged all my life experiences.

People like Mitch would never entertain someone like Phren. Mitch was tunnel focused on one thing, the known path to Euphoria. Mitch’s perception would not have any effect on me. We had different ambitions and a sailboat would not want to compete with a powered one.

A few days had passed and Phren asked if I wanted to join him on his next adventure to an island. The island was supposedly on route, 12 full moons away. I hastily responded “No!” All I had ever known for the last decade, was to stick with the boaters. It is what was expected of us and while I always wondered if there was more to life, I never thought I would do anything about it. Phren didn't bring it up again, but his question lingered in my mind.

While the boats served as refuge they only moved forward with time. Phren presented the possibility of adventure, but at the cost of everything I had gathered over the years.

[journeytoeuphoria]

"The right thing to do is so easy to see when you're seventeen years old and don't have to make any big decisions. When you know that no matter what you do someone will take care of you and fix everything. But when you're grown up, the world is not that black and white, and the right thing doesn't a tidy little arrow pointing to it"

Huntley Fitzpatrick

[journeytoeuphoria]

Listen to this song on low volume, as you read Mixed Feelings. I believe it sets the mood well

#Youtube

[journeytoeuphoria]

Mixed Feelings

It was the night of the 12th Full Moon. I gazed up at the stars in the night sky, wondering where I would be tomorrow. I was overwhelmed with feelings, if I would regret the decision I had made or be content with it. It was the first time I had seen land in a long time. I gazed at the shore to my east. Phren tapped his left hand on my right shoulder signaling it was time for us to go. Nighttime was the only time the boats stood still, so we could swim between them more easily.

I sat on the edge of my sailboat with both feet dangling in the air. I then put one foot in at a time, slowly guiding the rest of my body into the water. It was unbearably cold at first and I trembled. I slowly began threading through the water behind Phren. We made our way around boats of varying sizes. It was a long stretch that continued with uncertainty. With each movement, I felt my mind freeze even more. I turned around to look back at my boat a few times until I couldn’t see it anymore. I thought to myself this was it. There’s no turning back now. It took us the whole night and my body was more sore than it had ever been. We probably made our way past a few hundred boats by now and I noticed they grew smaller in size the more we swam.

At the break of dawn we had finally made it close to the shore. I was engulfed with confusion as I saw people swimming in different directions. Many were like me, excited, euphoric having taken a chance and jumped off the stolid boats.

Then there were others, trying to get away from the shore. Was it regret that fueled their motion. I started imaging their stories and couldn’t help but think, why would they be making their way back? The boats move on with time and it would not be an easy path to retrace. I pictured myself and wondered, would I be following them?

The weight of my thoughts began to pull me down. I held my head above the water and embraced my decision as I kept swimming forward. I reached the shore. EUPHORIA.

My body was no longer swaying but my mind made me believe otherwise. I looked for Phren, but there was no one. Was it my mind playing tricks on me? I lay there on the sand all by myself. I sat up and looked at the horizon. I saw thousands of boats and I tried to find the powerboat that belonged to Mitch.

[journeytoeuphoria]

In the end, we only regret the chances we didn't take

Lewis Carroll