jovine

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In this big world is there a place for someone as little as me?

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IM SO SICK OF YOU ALL

No nuance allowed. please share for a bigger sample 💕💕💕💕💕

*by eat i mean how do you prefer your cereal.

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count dooku after indulging in his daily milano cookie

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if I forgot your favorite subgenre or misclassified a band feel free to argue in the replies 👍

#i always loved power metal #i really liked uhhhh heavens gate

[jovine]

Just saw someone draw an old lady with perky boobs....

#please think

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personally i think we need to stfu when it comes to the term policing I swear to god some of y'all act like such victims for no reason

"You're policing what kinks i have!!!" No, you're just being told that finding incest and raceplay hot is fucking weird

"You're policing what I should write!!" No, you're just being told that romanticizing pedophilia and abuse is disgusting and can affect people.

"You're policing what media I consume!!!" No, you're just being told that openly supporting and buying books that fund transphobic laws makes you a shit person

"You're policing what labels I can identify as!!!" No, we're just telling you that identifying as a transphobic and lesbophobic label actually does harm people

Unless you are being physically harassed in real life about doing something, or someone is otherwise preventing you IRL from doing said thing, you are not being policed. You are just experiencing what it's like to be online.

Policing ≠ being told not to do something

Policing ≠  being educated on why you shouldn't do something

Policing ≠ experiencing consequences

*Policing ≠  being told no*

[jovine]

Let's Talk About Missing Persons

So, I've seen this post circulating last week, and a few others like it in the past year. I think this probably needs to be discussed every few years, and it feels like time.

First, a few caveats: there are reports on the post that Abby has been located and is fine, so no need to reblog and also that's great news, I'm very happy she is safe. Second, I did not especially doubt the veracity of the post, so I'm not impugning the people who made and posted it, but I also declined to reblog it for reasons I'll get into. Third, I know that especially in marginalized communities it can be dangerous to involve the police, and that Missing White Woman Syndrome means it can be difficult to get media coverage. I understand why Abby's community may have chosen to search for her in the way they did.

However, for everyone's safety, I do not link any missing persons post that requires you to contact an individual to report the missing person's whereabouts. If the poster doesn't ask you to contact the police or a known missing persons organization, I won't do it.

This is for the safety of the missing person.

When you see a post with someone's photo, name, and last known whereabouts, and you are asked to contact an individual -- a family member, partner, friend, etc -- what you are being asked to do is report on the whereabouts of one person you don't know to another person you don't know. You don't know that the person you're talking to isn't an abusive partner or parent, a stalker, or a person who means them material harm. One of the Insta accounts in the missing image doesn't appear to exist, and another has no bio and very little captioning on their images. I couldn't verify that Abby even knew these people.

Again: when I looked at the image, it looked sincere to me. I didn't doubt those people were earnestly searching for a friend they were worried about. But also, an abuser doesn't look like an abuser until they do. So I don't make exceptions, because a missing person is missing but a victim outed to their abuser has strong odds of being murdered. The most dangerous time in the life of an abused person is when they are leaving their abuser. Even if a victim simply logs on to say "Hey, I'm fine, these people mean me harm" the abuser has now flushed them out of hiding, and manipulated them into making a public statement.

If you can't verify positively that the person searching does not mean the missing person harm, you should not be circulating a post, full stop. At the very least, if the community doesn't wish for the help of the police (understandable) or can't get the help of an organization or community (frequent), the missing persons poster should advise you to speak to the missing person, not the searcher, and notify them they're being sought, as long as it's safe for both you and them to do so.

This isn't intuitive. We want to help, and search posters like that tug on the heartstrings. We know that when the police get involved even in something this innocuous, it can be perilous for everyone. But in situations where someone is so vulnerable, we have to concern ourselves first with harm reduction, which in this case means not spreading someone's photo with a stranger's contact information on it.

I'm glad Abby was found and is fine and that her searchers were in earnest. But that will not always be the case, and it's important to remember that.

[jovine]

9 Cows - Joe O’Donnell Acrylic Paint and Varnish on Wood

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This is my favorite character, Drugs. She's on some hideous cocktail of hallucinogens and is very gender.

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as they say, even a broken clock is right twice a day

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quick diary comic of something from today