jpollens

[jpollens]

(team party)

Clint: How are things going with Yelena?

Kate: She's playing hard to get, but little does she know, I'm a master at playing hard to get rid of.

(across the room)

Yelena: No, I don’t like her! I don't even get... why would... I... I've never liked anyone. It's none of your... you have the nerve, the audacity... Kate is my enemy’s mentee. And she is terrible, facewise. And how... how do I know, frankly, that you’re not the one who likes her? Maybe you do. Maybe you're trying to throw me off. Hmm? Check and mate.

Yelena: What did you ask again?

Natasha: If Kate’s homemade dip tasted okay.

[jpollens]

Man: Doc I keep straining my back

Doctor: let me take a look.

Doctor: Just going off the exam it looks like you are at that age where your body isn't going to work like it used to. But stretching it daily should help

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Woman: Doc I keep straining my back

Doctor: Yea it's cause you're overweight

Woman: Really? My weight?

Doctor: Yea you need to lose like 40 plus pounds

Woman: ok, is there anything else I could do while I lose the weight ?

Doctor: Not really, just work out more and eat less.

Woman: Aren't you going to do an exam

Doctor: No need

#doctor bias

#health #overweight #fat women #unbiased #healthcare scam #confirmation bias #perks of being a woman #medical degree at work #health humor #funny humor #sad humor

[jpollens]

Sam: So, how is it working with Kara at CatCo?

Lena: Good, she keeps me on my knees.

Sam: …

Lena: FUCK. I MEANT TOES — !

[jpollens]

incorrect buffy the vampire slayer quotes (insp in the reply section)

[jpollens]

Kara *waking up in bed*: What are you doing here?

Lena: What do you mean? We've been dating for 6 weeks

Kara: Wha- how? Really? Oh ok, cool. I'll go make us some breakfast , my love

Lena: Sounds good!

Nia: *coming out of the closet* It's official you guys are dating!

Lena: I can't believe that worked.

#oblivious kara #kara danvers #supercorp #incorrect supergirl quotes #incorrect supercorp #incorrect supercorp quotes #kara and lena #kara x lena #lena luthor #supercrack #lesbian humor

[jpollens]

Kara: Gee wiz I suddenly have alot of followers on Tumblr

Alex: Really!? Let me see

Kara: Why are you so surprised, I told you people like cute animal pics

Alex: Kara these are all porn bots!!!

Kara: Whats that?

Alex: Its not a real person

Kara: I did find it strange that none of them were wearing shirts

#oblivious kara #kara danvers #supercorp #incorrect supergirl quotes #incorrect supercorp #incorrect supercorp quotes #supercrack

[jpollens]

[jpollens]

Kara: I guess this is goodbye

Lena:what do you mean.

Kara: This is ending, we must go our separate ways

Alex: You are just going to the kitchen to help me bring out dinner

Kara: Farewell, my sweet sweet Lena. I will hold you in my heart

Alex: forget it, Nia can help me

#kara danvers #supercorp #incorrect supergirl quotes #incorrect supercorp #incorrect supercorp quotes #kara and lena #kara x lena #lena luthor #supercrack

[jpollens]

“She woke up one day and decided to stop waiting for her life to begin and start making things happen instead.”

— Unknown

[jpollens]

Kara: could you imagine if we had a kid

Lena: We do, her name is Nia

Kara: What! Nia isn't our kid

Lena: *calls Nia* hey what are you up to?

Nia: I'm in the lab trying to create a tree that grows cotton candy, why?

Kara: we have had a kid this whole time!! Why didn't you tell me!?

#oblivious kara #supercorp #kara danvers #incorrect supergirl quotes #incorrect supercorp #incorrect supercorp quotes #kara and lena #kara x lena #lena luthor #supercrack

[jpollens]

Nia: Hey Kara why is their a folder named porn on your laptop?

Alex: Gross I didn't think Kara would ever be into that kind of thing

Nia: Well that's the thing. It's just filled with pictures of Lena in suits

Alex: *on the floor laughing*

Kara: Not cool Nia. You aren't supposed to be snooping

Nia: I wasn't, it's just right here on your desktop

Kara: Wait a sec that isn't my laptop

Lex: Hey has anyone seen my laptop?

Kara,Nia,Alex:..................

Lex: Oh there it is

Lena: I'm going to be sick

#kara danvers #supercorp #incorrect supergirl quotes #incorrect supercorp #incorrect supercorp quotes #kara and lena #lena luthor #supercrack #oblivious kara

[jpollens]

Kara: So later tonight I have plans for you and my 3 fingers!

Lena: Oh really, what did you have in mind?

Nia: Yea, what's so exciting about fingers?

Lena: Nia! How long have you been there

Alex: Well this is my apartment. Did you guys really not know we were here

Kara: I knew you were here

Nia: I'm still confused. What's Kara doing with her 3-

Kara: You see Nia when a best friend likes another best friend that emotional bond turns into a physical one

Alex: I need another drink

#oblivious nia #kara danvers #supercorp #incorrect supergirl quotes #incorrect supercorp #incorrect supercorp quotes #kara and lena #kara x lena #lena luthor #supercrack #oblivious kara

[jpollens]

Kara: Are you mad at me

Lena: What? No, what would make you think that?

Kara: But you are tense and won't even let me look at your boobs

Nia : well we are in a meeting, Lena can't really take off her shirt, can she?

Andrea: I mean if it will make Kara feel better

Lena: Yea I'm not doing that

Kara: So you are mad at me?

#kara danvers #supercorp #incorrect supergirl quotes #incorrect supercorp #bottom kara #kara and lena #oblivious kara #incorrect supercorp quotes #kara x lena

[jpollens]

“When days are dark darling, remember, my love for you won’t go away…”

— David Ramirez, “Fires“ American Soil

[jpollens]

Lena: What do you want?

Kara: When we don't feel loved, we aren't kind to others. I wanted you to know that you are loved

Lena:......................

Kara: I love you Lena

Lena: you do?

Kara: I do

#kara danvers #supercorp #incorrect supergirl quotes #incorrect supercorp #incorrect supercorp quotes #kara and lena #kara x lena #lena luthor

[jpollens]

“Butterflies cannot see their wings. But the rest of the world can. - You. You are beautiful and while you may not see it, we can.”

— Unknown

[jpollens]

“It’s never too late to start over. If you weren’t happy with yesterday try something different today. Don’t stay stuck.”

— Alex Elle