karaliswrites

[karaliswrites]

It's Always Been You

Has some spoilers of Sulu's life after the Enterprise. Also I kind of tried to be accurate, but not all of this is canonical. I mostly changed dates around. Oh this is Chekov/Sulu by the way.

Pavel thinks maybe this isn’t a good idea.  He tries to remind himself that he’s a Starfleet officer, a commander, but he hasn’t seen Hikaru in so long and he’d be lying if he said he was ever good at controlling his emotions.  He’s gotten into many a fight and more than a few arguments in the early days on the Enterprise.  And of course he’s learned some discipline over the years, but this was Hikaru.  Chekov knows Hikaru’s married now, to a man named Ben.  He’d actually met the guy years ago, when they first started dating, and it had upset him then and, as much as he doesn’t want to admit it, it upsets him now.

He should be over Hikaru.  He should’ve been over him so many years ago.  But working so intimately with him onboard the Enterprise was definitely not a good way to avoid what they had.  Or used to have he supposed.  It had been his fault in the first place.  Him and his stupid emotions controlling him.  He’d had his eye on Hikaru since the academy.  But he was young and hadn’t even kissed anyone yet, let alone date someone, so he had been afraid of pursuing it.  Aside from the general anxiety and what if he’s not into guys crisis, Chekov also figured they might never see each other again.  And even though his heart had told him that was all the more reason to act on it, his mind told him it was stupid.  His emotions always got out of control and he knew if anything ever happened with them he’d fall too hard and wouldn’t be able to get over it.  And he was right.

When they were assigned to the Enterprise, both at the conn, Chekov found it much harder to keep his emotions at bay.  Sulu was just so attractive, so smart, so goddamn perfect and his heart just couldn’t take it.  But no, he was a Starfleet officer, focus on the mission, focus on the mission.

He couldn’t focus on the mission.

After months and months of dancing around each other, he’d finally gotten fed up and shoved Sulu against a wall.  The first kiss had been everything he’d ever dreamed and so much more.  Maybe it was the endless pining that preceded that kiss that made his cheeks hot like phaser fire and his insides turbulent as a plasma storm.  But maybe it was just Hikaru.  Dumb, perfect Hikaru.

It hadn’t gotten awkward between them.  At least not at first.  No, at first Pavel had been almost bubbling with feelings for the Enterprise pilot, bursting with energy at their touches and melting when Sulu would send him a soft smile.  Oh, he had it and he had it bad.  And Hikaru had done the same.  He seemed as interested as his — well, what were they again?  That was the problem, Chekov figured.  There had never been any establishment.  Of course he had been head over heels for Sulu and could tell it was reciprocated in some sort of way.  But the actual word boyfriend was never discussed.  They never really talked about what they were.  So he supposed it made sense when Sulu suggested they stop.

He hadn’t been as indifferent as he had tried to appear.  Chekov could tell he didn’t want to end things.  And after Sulu’s speech about unprofessionalism and staying focused, Pavel knew he was full of it.  But his throat had closed up and he couldn’t manage much more than a quiet okay before it was over.  That was that.  Sulu had thoroughly decimated his heart.

He beat himself up for a long time after that.  Thinking it was something he did wrong.  But he could never ruminate on it for long without feeling like he was about to burst into tears, so he never ruminated on it for long.  The rest of the time on the Enterprise had been painful for sure, but somehow he and Sulu had managed to stay friends.  Sometimes that had given him comfort, other times not so much.  But it had been fine.  Really.

But then they had gotten promoted, been transferred to other ships, the whole Starfleet package.  And even though Chekov knew the distance was good for him, he did really miss Hikaru.  And it was that yearning which brought him to pay a visit to Sulu after a while of his being on the Excelsior.  A visit that broke his stubborn heart just a little bit more.  Because that was when he first met Ben.  Ben had been a wonderful man and Chekov could see why Hikaru had fallen for him.  He was very kind and down-to-earth.  But despite how much he tried to be happy for them, he couldn’t help the burning feeling in his chest.  Ben was everything he wasn’t.  And it had been so soon or at least it felt like that to Chekov.  But then again, he had loved Sulu for what had felt like an eternity.  So maybe it wasn’t so soon after all.  Maybe he had just loved Sulu more than Sulu had ever loved him.  His visit didn’t last long.

It wasn’t long after that, Chekov can’t remember stardates, that Hikaru and Ben had a little girl.  Demora was her name.  Pavel could only bring himself to meet her shortly after she was adopted.  He had spent most of his time with Demora, holding her and coddling her so he could distract himself from the fact that this was Hikaru’s daughter.  He had already settled down with a wonderful husband and they had made a family together, and Chekov still couldn’t bring himself to forget those brown eyes that sparkled like stars.  He had thought himself disgusting, reminiscing about quick kisses in the hallways and slow, soft ones in his quarters while he was holding Demora.  While standing in the quarters of her parents — her parents — and trying not to feel sorry for himself.  But he just rocked her and rocked her and paced back and forth, trying not to listen to Sulu laugh at something his husband said.

So is this a terrible idea?  Definitely.  But he figures it’s been years since the last time he visited the Sulus.  He’s had time to process it, accept it, and he has, he has.  He’s a Starfleet officer.  He’s been through worse than this.  So he takes a deep breath and tries to prepare himself for Ben and Hikaru’s smiling faces when they open the door.  He rings and it takes a moment for anyone to answer.  He bites his lip, reminding himself to breathe.  He has to control himself, he has to.

The door opens and it’s not who he expects.  It’s a young girl, maybe 12 or so, he can’t really tell.  Has he really been gone that long?  “Demora?” he asks and the girl seems confused.  But then again, the last time she’s seen him would’ve been when she was just a baby.  “Who are you?” she replies and Chekov’s about to answer when he hears Sulu’s voice from the other room.  He swallows.  This is going to be harder than he thought.

Sulu comes around the corner in a dark blue silk robe and his face brightens when he sees who’s at his door.  “Pasha!” he cries and Pavel feels his heart flip.  God, he hasn’t been called that in so long.  “Hikaru,” he smiles, reaching his hand out for Sulu to shake.

“It’s been so long,” Hikaru says, that brilliant grin just shimmering on his face.  “Oh, Demora, this is my old shipmate, Chekov.”

Shipmate.  She turns from her father to Chekov and offers a polite smile.  He returns it.  “You probably don’t remember me, do you Demora?”

She shakes her head.  “Chekov came to visit when we first adopted you.  He held you almost the whole afternoon.  He was very good at calming you.”

There’s a brief silence and Chekov starts to feel his anxiety crawling back into his chest.  Breathe, Pavel, breathe.  “Where are my manners, please come in,” Hikaru says, standing back and gesturing into the hallway.  Pavel smiles curtly and enters, looking around because he hasn’t been here in at least a decade.  Demora runs off to what he assumes is her room and Pavel looks anywhere that isn’t at Hikaru.  “So,” he clears his throat.  “Where’s Ben?”

Sulu’s eyes seem to darken for a moment, but then it’s gone as quickly as it appeared.  “Oh, um,” he starts and Pavel already knows by the tone of his voice what happened.  But he can’t find it in himself to speak.  “He died years ago.  Transporter accident.”

There’s a moment of silence and Pavel can’t believe himself.  He’s actually pleased — pleased.  He wants to hit himself.  Of course he knows he feels sympathy for Hikaru, and for Ben, but deep down under all those broken shards of his heart he’s goddamn relieved and he knows it.  He’s disgusting.

“Hikaru, I . . . ,” he starts, but he chokes on the rest of his sentence.  Sulu waves a hand in the air, grimacing with old grief that isn’t poignant anymore.  “It’s alright.  It was a long time ago.  You couldn’t have known.”

He swallows and hears Hikaru sigh softly.  “Well, why don’t I put on some tea?”

Pavel manages to meet his eyes for a few seconds to nod.  “That sounds lovely, thank you.”

He puts on the kettle and Chekov sits at the table by the window, trying to steady his breathing.  He doesn’t hear Hikaru sit down across from him.  “So,” he says, folding his hands on the table.  “You’ve been gone for a long time.”

He manages a short laugh, trying to relax, but this is Hikaru.  “I have, haven’t I?”

Catching up with Sulu is easier than he expects.  Being alone with him while their tea brews is comfortable.  Comforting even.  He can pretend it’s like the good old days, exploring the universe together.  It feels like they’re in the mess hall again, reminiscing about their shifts and off time, laughing together.  Pavel feels young again as he follows Hikaru over to where the kettle is hissing.  “That sounds like quite the experience,” he laughs.  Chekov smiles.  “You have no idea.”

“How do you like your tea?  One lump or two?”

“Oh, two please.”

Hikaru smiles and grabs the sugar, plopping in two cubes for Chekov and one for himself.  He picks up the mug and hands it to Chekov and when he reaches to take it, their fingers brush.  It’s like the old days all over again.  His fingers buzz with static and his breath catches in his throat.  He meets Hikaru’s eyes and he knows he should pull away, but he just can’t bring himself to.  He doesn’t know what to say, his brain is fried, so he just parts his lips and keeps glancing between those shimmering eyes he’s missed so much.  “I, uh —” he manages somehow and Hikaru gives a smile so small he thinks he’s imagining it.  “I’m sorry,” he says, pulling his hand away so fast he spills a little of the tea onto his boots.  He can feel his face flushing red and wow he’s got it bad.

Hikaru’s steady fingers take the mug from him and place it on the counter before taking Pavel’s hands in his.  “Pasha,” he says barely above a whisper and Chekov feels his heart stutter in his chest.  He musters up the courage to meet his eyes and is surprised to see only softness there.  “It’s alright.”

He licks his lips, his heart beating furiously like it’s going full impulse, and this can’t be real can it?  Sulu’s gaze flutters over his face and suddenly he’s blurting, “I’ve never . . . I’ve never forgotten about you, Hikaru.”

“Neither have I.”

When Sulu’s lips meet his, his cheeks feel the same phaser fire heat and his insides are that old plasma storm.  He moves softly with the kiss, trying to control himself.  But he’s felt the phantom feeling of this for too long, missed it with every fiber of his being, and he can’t help himself.  He wraps his arms around Hikaru’s shoulders and kisses him with the passion of decades, of millennia, because it feels like he’s been waiting that long.  But Sulu holds him just as tightly, kissing back with as much enthusiasm, like he’s not the only one who missed this and it’s so worth however long Pavel’s been waiting.

He doesn’t know how long the kiss lasts, but when it’s over he knows it isn’t nearly long enough.  He has at least forever to make up for, why do they have to stop now?  He looks breathlessly into warm brown eyes for a moment, but then Hikaru smiles and he can’t help smiling too.  “I’m glad you came to visit, Pavel.”

He feels himself grin.  “Me too.”

#writing #my wrtiting #fanfic #fanfiction #star trek #tos star trek #the original series #hikaru sulu #pavel chekov #chekov x sulu #sulu x chekov #chulu #star trek spoilers #tos spoilers #kinda #demora sulu #ben sulu #angst #angst with a happy ending

[karaliswrites]

Cold

I wrote this really late so it’s probably terrible and full of mistakes. Contains spoilers

~~~~

Lio has been lying to Galo for months now. Well, it’s not necessarily lying, he's just omitting the truth. The truth that each and every night he shivers himself to sleep, despite the heavy blanket Galo gave him. He sleeps on the couch and it leaves his back sore in the morning, but he doesn’t mind. Galo offered him the empty space in his own bed many times when he first moved in, but after countless rejections, he just gave up trying.

Lio’s tried to sneak some clothes from the laundry to provide him extra warmth, but one time this little secret was revealed. He had slept through the alarm he set to wake up before Galo to change out of the blue-haired man’s clothes, and he was caught practically swimming in an old t-shirt of his. His face had turned crimson and he had quickly pulled off the shirt and chucked it at the smiling man’s head. After that incident, Lio was hesitant to steal any more of Galo’s clothes.

So every night he struggles to fall asleep and to stay asleep. Some nights he doesn’t sleep at all, and he knows Galo can tell by the way he sends him worried glances every few minutes at work. But he doesn’t tell Galo about his problem. He’s the ex-leader of the Mad Burnish and he’s been through far worse than a little chill. Even though this is much more than just a little chill. With the Promare gone, the entire world is like ice to him. But he can handle it on his own.

It’s October and Lio’s wrapped tightly in two blankets, an extra for the change in the weather. But still he finds himself trembling. He tries to stop his teeth from chattering, but to no avail. He snuggles deeper into the little warmth he gets from the blankets, and he can’t help thinking how pathetic he is. A few months ago he was leading the Mad Burnish and trying to stop Kray’s plans, and now he’s shivering despite being wrapped in two blankets, his eyes red and burning from lack of sleep. He hasn’t slept more than two hours straight in days. He’s been waking up with a frozen nose and icy skin.

Maybe that’s what has him standing and rubbing his arms as he walks towards Galo’s room. The door is slightly ajar and he nudges it open, peeking inside to see his friend soundly asleep. He’s not even wearing a shirt. Lio doesn’t understand how he isn’t a literal block of ice, but he figures Galo isn’t used to the warmth of the Promare like he is. He shivers and a jolt of cold shoots down his spine. He bites his lip as he moves towards the bed, his stomach churning. He stands there a moment, looking at Galo’s peaceful face. Strands of his hair fall across his forehead and Lio gets an overwhelming urge to sweep them away, but he stops his hand midway. He pulls it back to wrap around himself and tries to steady his shaking as much as possible. “G-Galo . . . ,” he whispers, but the man doesn’t stir. He swallows.

“Galo,” he says louder and he shifts. “G-Galo, wake u-up.”

His eyes squeeze tightly shut before they open, revealing that stunning teal. “Lio?” he asks groggily, wiping the sleep from his eyes. “What is it?”

He’s visibly more awake as he says this, sitting up as his gaze becomes clearer and his speech less slurred. “Is something wrong?”

Lio holds himself as still as he can possibly muster, but he still feels his muscles spasming. “Do you have an e-extra blanket?” he says softly, afraid if he speaks any louder he’ll lose control of his voice. Galo’s brow furrows slightly. “You’re still cold with two?”

His tone isn’t bitter. It’s more concerned. Lio shifts, feeling himself shudder as the movement breaks his resolve. “A l-little,” he mutters, wrapping his arms tighter around himself.

“Well, c’mere.”

Lio looks at him like he’s crazy as he extends his arms towards the blond. He feels his cheeks start to warm. It’s a pleasant sensation. “Wh-what do you mean?” he finds himself stuttering and Galo just smiles wider.

“I mean c’mere.”

Lio takes a shaky step forward, expecting Galo to scoot back, but he doesn’t. When Lio’s close enough, Galo grabs him around the middle and pulls him on top of him. Lio gasps at the sudden rush of cold air that whizzes past him, and when he comes to a halt on Galo’s chest, he hits his shoulder softly. “Galo!”

“You’re like ice,” he remarks and Lio huffs.

“How exactly is this helping?” he asks, trying to hide his slowly reddening cheeks behind his hair. But Galo’s hold on him is firm and he can’t do much to hide his face. “I’m keeping you warm with my burning soul!” he says cheerfully and Lio groans.

“Right.”

“Hey, it’s helping, isn’t it?”

He’s suddenly very aware of the fact that his fingers are pressed against Galo’s exposed chest and he’s definitely blushing now. Galo is practically radiating with heat, curse him, and Lio feels himself shiver as his warmth thaws his chilled bones. He lets out a sigh and melts into Galo’s arms, laying his head on the firefighter’s chest. “You are pretty warm . . . ,” he admits. He can’t see him, but he knows Galo’s smiling. “I told you! It’s my burning soul!”

Lio makes a pathetic sound as he snuggles further into Galo’s warmth and he thinks he hears the blue-haired man’s breath hitch. He lies there for a moment, basking in his body heat, until his human heater speaks up. “Were you this cold last night too?”

Lio doesn’t respond, his fingers sliding over Galos’ chest and shoulders absentmindedly. “Lio.”

“I . . . I’ve been cold this entire time . . . ,” he finally admits. “All the m-months I’ve been here. I’m not used to life without the Promare to keep me warm . . . .”

Galo is silent for a long moment. “Is that why you look so tired at work?”

Even though Galo is the biggest idiot on the face of the earth, he’s not really that dumb. He’s actually a lot smarter than anyone gives him credit for. “Yeah . . . those nights were really bad. Sometimes I couldn’t get any sleep at all.”

“What?” Galo exclaims, grabbing his shoulders and Lio raises his head. His heart stutters at the expression on his face, full of concern laced with what looks a little like heartbreak. “Why didn’t you tell me? I would’ve let you come in here with me if I knew you were suffering through that.”

He suddenly feels very ashamed of not telling Galo and his stomach sinks a little. “I’m sorry,” he mutters, his eyes fixed on Galo’s collarbone. “I didn’t want to be a bother . . . .”

“Lio,” he says and the blond can’t help looking back into those beautiful teal eyes of his. “You aren’t a bother. I opened my apartment to you. It’s yours too. And I’m here for you, okay? Always. I want to help you if you need something. I’d give you the last clean spoon so you could eat your ice cream, man.”

Lio can’t help the giggle that escapes him at that. “What?! I would!” Galo cries, but he’s smiling too. He draws a design on his bicep. Something similar to a heart. “That’s very sweet of you,” he replies, half-jokingly. “You know I can’t live without my ice cream. Especially when I constantly feel like I’m in subzero temperatures.”

“Hey, it’s always best to eat ice cream when it’s cold outside.”

Lio gives him a look. “What?”

“You idiot,” he says, looking at him like he’s lost his mind. “You don’t eat ice cream when it’s cold.”

“Why not?” Galo asks genuinely. Lio can’t believe they’re having this discussion right now. “Because it’s cold.”

“So?”

“What do you mean so?”

“I think it’s good!”

Lio shakes his head. “There is seriously something wrong with you.”

Galo pouts and Lio wishes he could kiss it from his lips. He suddenly remembers a question he’s been meaning to ask for months. “Another thing that proves there’s something wrong with your brain,” he says, gently flicking Galo’s forehead. “If there even is one in there,” he mutters beneath his breath, to which Galo cries out indignantly. Lio fixes him with a smug gaze, unable to keep the smirk off his face. “Where did you learn to do CPR?”

“I . . . learned at Burning Rescue . . . .”

“Did they teach you to use tongue?” he asks teasingly, dragging a finger over Galo’s collarbone. His face turns bright red and Lio smirks, thinking he’s adorable. “U-Uh . . . ,” he stutters and Lio’s heart does so as well. “W-Well . . . it’s uh . . . .”

“It’s what?” Lio asks, leaning slightly closer to Galo’s face, feeling his heartbeat pounding against his chest where they touch. He quickly looks around before his gaze returns to lilac eyes. “I-It’s Burning Rescue procedure!”

Lio raises an eyebrow. “Oh really?”

“Y-Yeah!” he says quickly and Lio smirks.

“Do you always whimper when you do CPR too?”

“Y-Yes! It’s . . . good for . . . c-calming me down. R-Releasing a sound is good for expelling e-energy.”

“Oh, it had the opposite effect on me,” he purrs, stretching out a little on top of Galo. “I was quite excited hearing you make those sounds.”

Galo turns impossibly redder and Lio’s stomach is doing somersaults. “I wonder if I could make you make those sounds again . . . .”

“Yes,” Galo says suddenly and Lio thinks he hadn’t meant to. He glances away nervously and Lio has to try very hard to keep himself from saying ‘cute’ aloud. “Oh really? And what would I have to do to make that happen?” he asks mocking innocence and Galo opens his mouth before closing it again. His chest is rising and falling much more shallowly and Lio tilts his head slightly. “Looks like you’re having a bit of difficulty breathing there, Galo. Maybe I have to do CPR on you.”

Galo swallows thickly and Lio inches closer. “Maybe I’ll have to try the Burning Rescue technique while I’m at it,” he says, his lips brushing Galo’s as he speaks. Before the firefighter can respond, he leans the rest of the way forward, connecting their lips once more. Just like the rest of him, Galo’s lips feel like flames. He runs a hand over his burning skin to tangle in blue hair, gently slipping his tongue between Galo’s lips like he had done to Lio months before. He releases a sweet noise and Lio’s stomach somersaults at the sound, urging him to kiss him — sorry, do CPR on him — for the rest of time. Galo’s lips are soft and eager and welcoming and Lio feels like he’s drowning. Drowning in flames. His mind is blank and the entire world fades away as their tongues dance slowly in Galo’s mouth. Lio lets out a small moan, feeling himself starting to fade as exhaustion rudely interrupts his very important resuscitation.

He pulls away reluctantly, leaving both of them panting slightly. Galo gives him a crooked grin that has his heart skipping beats. “Wow . . . you’re really good at that . . . .”

“Well, I learned from the best,” he smiles, lightly pecking the tip of Galo’s nose. He lies down on his chest and lets out a sigh that takes all the tension in his back and shoulders with it. He melts into a puddle in Galo’s arms and presses a sleepy kiss to his collarbone. “We should get some sleep though.”

“We should. Sleep is good. Especially for my boyfriend.”

Lio’s entire body is set ablaze at that word and he lifts his head. “Boyfriend?”

Galo’s face falls. “I-If that’s okay. I . . . I really really like you and I-I thought —”

Lio silences him with a soft kiss. When he pulls away, he gives Galo a smile. “I really really like you too, dumbass.”

He can practically see the fear fade from his face and he smiles a little wider. “So it’s okay. It’s more than okay.”

He settles back into Galo’s arms and another sigh dances over his boyfriend’s skin. His boyfriend . . . .

He feels himself start to drift and he lets his eyelids fall heavily shut, thankful for the sweet relief from their exhausted burn. “Wow,” Galo’s voice pulls him from the beginnings of sleep. “Lio Fotia is my boyfriend.”

He giggles. “Yes,” he mumbles, pressing a soft kiss to Galo’s neck. “Now get some sleep, you idiot.”

“Okay,” he replies, wrapping his arms tighter around the blond. Lio hums and snuggles into Galo’s warmth, feeling himself start to fade. He’s lulled by the pattern of his breathing and the soft thud of his heartbeat, and soon he’s overcome with the wonderful embrace of sleep.

#writing #my wrtiting #galo thymos #lio fotia #promare #galolio #galo x lio #lio x galo #fanfiction #fanfic #i forgot how i tag things on here #hello hi im not posting thus awful thing instead of sleeping what #whatre you talking about

[karaliswrites]

The Quidditch Cup

Request

~~~~

Eren takes a deep breath as he and his best friend walk towards the quidditch pitch.  He grips his broomstick tighter in his hand, parting his lips before closing them again.  His heart is racing and his stomach is churning but he tries to appear nonchalant, like today is any other day.  He’s about to speak when Armin lets out a breath.  “So,” he says, tucking strands of blond hair behind his ear.  “Lot of pressure today.”

“Yeah,” he sighs, licking his lips that have become dry in the breeze.  “Lot of pressure.”

“Do you think you’re ready?”

“We’ve practiced all year for this, so we’re as ready as we can be.  But going up against Slytherin makes it nearly impossible to win.  Their team is really good.”

“Yeah.  With Levi and Mikasa on the team, I can see why.”

Eren lets out a groan and Armin giggles which sends the brunet’s heart aflutter.  “Well, you’re a valuable member of the team,” the blond says, taking him a bit by surprise.  “I know you’ll do well if you try your best.”

Eren sucks in a deep breath, feeling his heart twist painfully in his chest.  He feels sick in a fluttery way and he decides he just needs to go for it.  “Hey, Armin,” his mouth speaks for him.  The blond stops in his tracks and turns to look at him with big blue eyes.  “Yeah?”

“I, um . . . .”

Now that he’s started, he’s lost any courage he had and he drags his feet against the dirt, rubbing the back of his neck and swallowing nervously.  “I wanted to, uh . . . ask you s-something.”

“Yes, Eren?” he says, taking a step closer.  His eyes seem to shimmer with something Eren thinks he might recognize.  But he doesn’t want to assume anything.  “I-I, um . . . ,” he stutters, his face flushing at their proximity.  They aren’t particularly close, but Eren can see the light freckles dotted across his nose, the individual lashes that brush across his cheeks.  His breath hitches.

“Uh . . . d-did you, um . . . ,” he tries, looking away from Armin’s face in hopes that it might help him remember how to speak.  “I w-wanted to ask if um . . . you maybe . . . wanted to go . . . out.  With m-me.  Like . . . romantically, uh . . . .”

He wants to slap himself for being so awkward, but Armin smiles which is a good sign.  “I’ll tell you what,” he says and Eren isn’t sure where this is going.  “If you win the Quidditch Cup, I’ll go out with you.  I’ll even throw in a kiss.”

Eren’s heart leaps into his throat because he hasn’t been rejected.  He nods and mutters, “Alright,” because he doesn’t think he can say much else without choking.  Armin flashes him a brilliant smile and leans forward, pressing a fleeting kiss to his cheek before pulling away.  “Good luck, Eren,” he says before turning and heading to the stands.

————-

The game is intense to say the least.  With Levi as chaser and Mikasa as seeker, it’s almost impossible for Gryffindor to keep up.  Eren spends the game watching Slytherin’s score rise exponentially and Gryffindor struggle to gain a few points.  It’s an absolute massacre.  And Eren feels his heart sink.

When he walks out of the changing rooms, he feels like he’s lost everything.  He’s a little upset, of course, that he didn’t win the Quidditch Cup, but that isn’t really what’s bothering him.  What’s bothering him is that Mikasa and Levi just ruined his potential relationship with the boy of his dreams.  But when he sees Armin standing, waiting for him, just outside the stands, he figures he might as well give it a shot.

He lets out a sigh and makes his way over, flashing the blond a nervous smile.  “Hey,” he breathes.  “Hey.”

Eren rubs a hand over the back of his neck and lets out a shaky laugh.  “So, I uh . . . I didn’t win the Quidditch Cup, but uh . . . .”

He feels his heart ache as he looks into ocean eyes, so he glances off to the fields spread before him, like emerald waves leading to Hogwarts.  “I really really like you and I was hoping you’d reconsider —” he starts before the Ravenclaw interjects with an “Oh, shut up.”

And suddenly he’s being yanked forward by his tie and his lips collide with Armin’s.  He stands in shock for a moment and thinks his heart may have very well stopped.  But Armin’s lips are soft and they move against his in a way that mimics the tide, how it ebbs and flows or how waves gently recede from the shore only to return again moments later.  He melts into the kiss and pulls the Ravenclaw closer by his uniform, meeting each kiss as it crashes like a wave against his lips.

But it’s over far too soon and Armin pulls away, slightly out of breath as he grins.  Eren somehow finds it within himself to ask, “So I guess this means you’ve reconsidered?”

Armin giggles.  “Yes, I’ve reconsidered.”

#Eremin #erearu #erenxarmin #erenjaeger #arminarlert #snk #attack on titan #shingeki no kyojin #au #alternate universe #fanfic #fanfiction #writing #my wrtiting #hogwarts au #request #this is kind of shitty but hopefully it's alright

[karaliswrites]

Writing’s On the Wall

I listened to this song the entire time I wrote this stupid thing

~~~~~ He isn’t sure what prompts him to do it.  He’s gotten so good at ignoring it, he isn’t sure he’ll be able to come up with something to say.  It’s ancient now, rotting somewhere in the forgotten corners of his mind like a virus, slowly spreading through his body and creeping into his heart.  It’s something evil, something dark and insidious, like a disease he realizes he has moments before it kills him.  He thinks it must’ve killed him months ago, years even, leaving his old self behind with the broken shards of his heart.  He isn’t himself anymore — neither of them are.  And deep down he knows it really isn’t Eren’s fault.  

Perhaps there is a little bit of his old self left over after all.But whatever his reasoning, whatever it is his mind is telling him to do, he’s following a familiar path to the dungeons.  He treads on pieces of his heart and soul that have shattered and added to the distance between he and his best friend.  The path back to how things used to be is sharp with the shards and it becomes increasingly less appealing to cross the longer it gets.  He doesn’t want to get those pieces back.  It makes him remember why they broke off in the first place and it only makes the fragile mess that remains of himself even more delicate.

He turns down a corridor, down a staircase or two and feels his heart start to race.  He tries to quell the feeling, admonishing himself for being so naive.  For being so afraid.  He’d tried to give up being afraid a long time ago.  Especially over something as miniscule as this.

But it isn’t a small thing.  If he really thinks about it, he knows it’s much more than that.  It’s everything.  Or at least it is to him.  But when he thought Eren didn’t feel the same about it, he figured it would be best to stop trying.  To stop thinking of it as his world.  There was more for him, surely there was.  Surely there was more to his life than bending over backwards for his best friend, throwing himself in front of him whenever someone took a shot or a stab at him.  He already had his own problems to deal with.  He couldn’t deal with Eren’s for him.

And yet, here he is, standing before the bars of his cell, seeing emerald eyes looks at him in something like shock.  “Armin?” he asks and for a moment, there’s a softness in his voice that takes him back years.  Back to when they were cadets and things between them weren’t so impossible.  But he shakes his head.  That version of them is dead and gone.  Has been for awhile.  He should be over it.

He pulls the keys he stole from Heichou from his pocket and unlocks the cell without a word.  He can’t speak to Eren, let alone look at him.  His throat is dry and his pulse is throbbing frantically in his throat.  He takes a steady breath and lets it out slowly, pushing open the door and shutting it behind him.  It makes a soft clang as it closes and he brings a hand up to run through blond hair.  “What are you doing here?”

He doesn’t say anything.  Instead, he moves to sit beside him on his bunk, staring intently at the stone floor.  He hates how pathetic he’s being.  How nervous he is.  He blinks and inhales through his nose, finally lifting his head to meet Eren’s eyes with a fiery gaze.  “We need to talk about it.”

“Talk about what?” he asks and Armin almost lets out a scoff.  

“You know damn well what about, Eren,” he replies and he realizes just how long it’s been since he’s uttered the other boy’s name.  Never before has it held so much bitterness.  “I don’t know what you want me to say,” Eren says with a spark of anger that he manages to keep cool.  He’s never been like that.  His anger has always been burning hot, like a fire that erupted from him.  Uncontrollable.  Spontaneous.  Not cool and collected.  Not like an ominous breeze before a storm.  Not like the distant rumble of thunder in the distance.  His anger should be lightning striking quick and powerful.  Not like thunder.

“You’ve changed,” he decides to say and emerald eyes fix him with a calculative glare.  Armin realizes that everything about Eren seems entirely cold to him.  His usual warmth and comfort, his recklessness and bluntness — everything.  It’s all gone.  It’s been replaced by a more cautious version of him.  A version that thinks very thoroughly about what it is he’s about to say, of the effect it will have on others.  The one that has become disillusioned by his failures, that no longer acts on instinct, but rather on the strategy of others.  It’s sickening.

“You’re not the Eren I used to know.  You’re not Eren.  Not my Eren,” he says and the boy turns away, his hair brushing his neck.  Even that was unlike him.  He had always told Mikasa not to let her hair get too long, that it would interfere with her abilities.  And yet here he was, his hair longer than he’d ever let hers get to be.  The real Eren would tell him to cut it.  That he was being stupid and would get himself killed.  The real Eren would tell him.

“I don’t know what you mean, Armin,” he says and Armin tries very hard not to see if he can’t slap some sense into him.  

“If you don’t know what I mean, then you’ve got to be the most oblivious, insensitive person I’ve ever known.”Their gazes meet, newborn fire meeting frozen spark.  “Why did you come here, Armin?” Eren asks bitterly and he clenches his fists at his sides.  “I came here because . . . .”

Why was he here?  What was he expecting out of this conversation?  Did he really think he would be able to get his best friend back?  After all the pain and suffering between them, keeping them apart, did he really think he’d be strong enough to pull himself across it?

“I came here to tell you I’ve given up.”

Emerald eyes look at him and for a moment he thinks he might see that fire.  That warm spark of Eren that lies trapped beneath the cold exterior he’s built around himself.  “What do you mean?”

“What does it matter?” he spits, his voice rising just the slightest in volume.  “You’ve had years to figure it out, why the fuck should I figure it out for you?  Do it yourself for once.  If you really care.”

He isn’t really sure where the words come from, but they surprise him in their truth.  Eren turns a bit more towards him and Armin can’t help noticing a strand of hair that hangs just above his eye, too short to be pulled back with the rest of his hair.  If this had been years before, he would’ve brushed it away and let his touch linger against Eren’s face.  Maybe run his thumb against his cheek, lean closer, and . . .

He shoves the thought back into the darkness that’s suppressed it for years before it can fully form in his mind.  “I do care,” he says and Armin gives him a glare.  

“Really?” he spits like poison, his fists trembling at his sides.  “Then who the fuck are you?”

“What?”

“Who the fuck are you?  What did you do with Eren?”

“Armin, I don’t know what you’re talking about.  It’s always been me.”

“No it isn’t.  Eren isn’t like this.”

“What the fuck would you know?  You don’t know who I am and you have no right to tell me.  It’s not that big of a deal anyways.  There’s plenty more you should be worrying about.  Fucking grow up, Armin.”

His fist collides with Eren’s jaw and the boy seems shocked at the impact.  But Armin doesn’t give him much time to think, swinging his fist at his face and knocking him down against the mattress.  He sends punch after punch to Eren’s face, but the boy manages to grab his arms and even now he’s stronger than Armin will ever be.  He struggles in his grip, panting and gritting his teeth.  “You’re the one who needs to grow up, not me!  Look around, Eren!  How could you not have noticed that everyone around you doesn’t give a fuck anymore?!  Everything’s falling apart, Eren!  And you didn’t even fucking notice!  You don’t fucking care!”

“Armin!” he says a bit loudly, trying to hold him still, but he’ll have none of it.  “I do care!”

“NO YOU FUCKING DON’T!” he nearly screams and Eren goes silent.  He lets out a sob despite himself and his body goes slack, weak and pathetic in Eren’s grip.  “If you did care, you’d fucking talk to me.”

He feels tears form in his eyes and fall from his lashes, rolling down his cheeks and into the fabric of Eren’s shirt.  “You’d fucking notice how much I need you.”

He looks up to meet Eren’s gaze and he sees the past.  The fear of the future and heartbreak of the present disappear until he can see Eren truly.  The real him.

Eren leans up to capture his lips and for a moment he kisses back eagerly because he’d be lying to himself if he said he hasn’t wanted this since the beginning.  But after a few moments of bliss he wrenches himself out of Eren’s grip, fresh tears hot against his skin.  “No!” he yells despite himself.  “You don’t get to do that to me!  Not now!  Not after everything we’ve gone through!  You don’t get to mock me like that!”

“Armin, I’m not mocking you,” he says, gently reaching out to touch the boy’s shoulder.  His voice is warm and gentle and Armin blinks because it’s Eren.  It’s Eren.  “I do care, Armin.  I just . . . ,” he lets out a heavy sigh and Armin realizes how stupid he’s been.  He can hear the weight of Eren’s breath, see the tension in his shoulders, and he should’ve realized it wasn’t all about him.  Eren was going through things just like he was, some of them purely inconceivable.  He had so much weighing him down, so much pressure and so many expectations.  He probably felt so depended on.  And Armin can’t even imagine how stressful that would be.  How many doubts must be flashing through his head.  He wants to slap himself for being so ignorant.

“Eren,” he breathes, leaning forwards and kissing his lips again.  Eren melts into the kiss, his fingers coming up to tangle in Armin’s hair, their lips meeting again and again.  Softly.  Tenderly.  He pulls away and stares into emerald eyes, feeling tears on his lashes waiting to fall.  His lip quivers and he throws his arms around Eren’s neck, holding tightly.  He returns the embrace and his fingers dig into the fabric of Armin’s shirt.  “I’m sorry, Eren,” he says shakily.  “I should’ve known — I . . . ,”

“It’s okay, Armin,” he says against the blond’s ear.  “I should’ve known too.”

#Eremin #erenxarmin #erearu #Eren Jaeger #armin arlert #snk #shingeki no kyojin #attack on titan #fanfiction #fan fiction #fanfic #writing #my wrtiting #idk #i didn't read this after i wrote it #idk what this is #the dialogue is weird but i think i like it in general #idrk though because as I said i didn't read it #i just wrote #so have this weird thing i guess

[karaliswrites]

No One But You

I read A Separate Peace awhile ago and finally managed to write a fanfic.  Probably some spoilers for those who haven’t read the book

~~~~~

Finny reminded Gene of summer.  Of course, his appearance consisted of sun-kissed skin and golden waves and some feeling like the coast of California.  Gene had never been to California.  But he figured if Finny were to be any state, he’d be California.  His smile was radiant as the rays of the sun, his green eyes shimmered like jewels with gold flakes sprinkled across them.  His laugh was light and airy and the way he walked seemed like water, smooth and flowing and never interrupted.  Everything about him was light and sunshine and summer.

But it wasn’t just his looks that seemed like summer to Gene.  It was also his personality.  His spontaneity, his exuberance.  Everything.  Everything was summer.

Gene considered himself to be winter, not only due to the cooler tones of his complexion or the edge to his personality, but also because of how opposite he was to Finny.  They were of different natures, different worlds almost, and so Gene thought he must’ve been winter.  

He had once told Phineas about how he thought of him as summer and he didn’t ask what he meant.  And he had replied that he thought of Gene as winter which further confirmed his beliefs.  But some small part of him was a bit uneasy at the fact that Finny also thought of him as winter.  That only proved how different they were.  Never would they be of the same caliber.  Gene was in a separate hemisphere, across the world from wherever Finny shone, shivering in his frozen prison.  He wasn’t sure what he had done to deserve Phineas.  He didn’t think anything he could ever do would make him worthy of seeing just one of his smiles.  Of hearing his laugh for even a moment.

And as much as he didn’t want to admit it, his heart had flipped one day when he and Finny were walking along in the snow, the blond’s breath coming out labored and heavy as he tried to move with his crutches.  Gene always knew he was exhausted just getting from place to place, but he never brought it up.  Finny would’ve just denied it anyways.  Then he had said that he loved the winter and Gene felt his ears heat.  “What do you mean?” he had asked before he could stop himself.  He knew surely his interpretation of Finny’s words was wrong and disgusting and of course someone like Phineas would never feel such a thing for someone like him.  “What do you mean, what do I mean?  I love winter.  That’s what I mean.  And when you really love something, then it loves you back, in whatever way it has to love.”

He glanced over his shoulder at Gene then and he felt his heart flip again as he met green eyes, seeming brighter now against the pale landscape.  But he shook the thought from his head that perhaps he really was winter and fell into step beside him as they continued towards their destination.

Gene wasn’t sure which version of Finny he enjoyed more.  In the summer session, he was free and glowing with the sort of light only he could possess.  He had been breathtaking.  And despite the guilt gnawing at Gene’s conscience ever waking moment because of the incident, he thought Finny had been oddly beautiful in the winter session as well.  He stood out against the whites and greys of the world around them, whereas Gene blended in.  And although he had been restrained by his injury, his eyes had seemed brighter, his smile warmer.  He still brought summer even on the coldest winter day.  

Phineas had always appreciated all around him and he had his own way of doing so.  In the summer, it was sports and the tree and the river and the air.  The sun and the sky and the grass.  Anything and everything.  But when winter rolled around, it became the elms and the snow and the frost and the cold.  And with his injury, he couldn’t enjoy it as much as he used to.  But he still somehow found a way to admire the world and everything it held and Gene had no idea how he could do it.  It seemed to him that almost everything was against him, so unlike him, during the winter session, but it didn’t seem to phase Finny in the slightest.

It was during one of these winter days that they were in their dorm just after supper.  Gene was wrapped in a thick blanket, studying French for an upcoming test.  Finny had been quiet since they got to the room and at first Gene thought he must’ve been working on something for class or had simply fallen asleep.  But when he had looked up from his studying after half an hour, he found him lying on his bed, staring up at the ceiling.  He almost said something, but he wasn’t sure what to say, so he just went back to his work.

“Hey, Gene?” he asked after a few more minutes of silence and he looked up and across the room.  “Yes, Finny?”

“Can I ask you a question?”

“Sure.”

“Do you ever feel like you’re . . . different . . . than other people?”

Gene blinked and shifted in his chair.  “I don’t think I know what you mean.”

“I mean,” he breathed, sitting up in bed and running a hand through dirty blond hair.  “Is there some part of you that really wants something, but it’s not something you should want?”

He felt his pulse quicken, but tried to ignore wishful thinking.  He thought about what to say, about what Finny wanted him to say, but he didn’t know.  So he decided to just be honest.  “Yeah.  I think I know what you mean.”

Green eyes looked at him then and he didn’t blink, feeling if he so much as moved those eyes would see right through him.  “And you just . . . you’re goddamn scared, but you still feel like somehow everything will be alright?  You feel so vulnerable, but protected at the same time?”

Finny’s expression seemed like he was confusing even himself, so Gene forced a smile.  “You’re being rather vague,” he said and Finny chuckled.  “I know.  I’m sorry.  I know what I mean I just . . . don’t know how to explain it.”

A silence fell over them before Gene cleared his throat.  “Say, why don’t we listen to some music?” he suggested and Finny gave him a smile which he was thankful for.  “Sure.”

He stood and moved to the radio, switching it on.  He saw a certain heaviness on Finny’s shoulders, but he tried to ignore it.  Maybe a little jazz could loosen the tightness of his muscles.

When music flowed from the radio, it was slow and soft and gentle.  “Should I try to find some jazz?” he asked and to his surprise, Finny was quick to answer “No.”

He glanced at him over his shoulder to see green eyes staring at him.  “Leave it on this.”

Gene swallowed and began to walk back to his bed when he heard a shuffling from Finny’s side of the room.  He turned around to see the blond on his feet, wobbling before catching his balance.  “Finny, what are you doing?” he asked, feeling his heart wrench with worry.  “I want to dance.”

“What?”

“I want to dance,” he said again with a large grin.  

“But, Finny, you’re leg, you — you can’t, you’ll hurt yourself,” he protested.  The blond limped over to him with that lopsided smile that made Gene’s stomach somersault.  “Ah, you worry too much,” he said, standing before him.  “Besides, Stanpole says it’s nearly healed, anyway.”

“But, Finny, what if you —”

“C’mon, Gene,” he interjected, slipping a hand over his waist and Gene gasped softly.  “Dance with me.”

Brown eyes looked nervously up into green and he couldn’t resist the glimmer there, the way that smile lay so gently on his lips.  So he glanced down to their feet, feeling his cheeks flush pink.  Finny took his hand in his own and Gene placed the other on his shoulder.  They began to sway to the music and at first, Finny found it a bit difficult to find his rhythm with his cast and Gene had been worried, but he had simply laughed it off.  But then he evened out and they were dancing.  They waltzed a bit awkwardly for a few songs, but then they began to slow and Gene allowed himself to lean his head against Finny’s, feeling the blond wrap his arms around his waist.  He slung his own around his neck, their bodies pressing together as they swayed.  Gene shut his eyes as they moved, taking in Finny’s scent and running his fingers through the hair at his nape.

He wanted to stay in the moment forever.  He wanted to always be able to hold Finny close like he could now, breathe him in and feel his warmth.  “Hey, Gene?” he said barely above a whisper, his breath tickling his ear and his neck.  He pulled away enough to look at him, his throat going dry at the look in green eyes.  “Yes?” he mumbled and suddenly Finny’s lips met his.  Seasons collided, ice mixing with sunshine, warmth meeting cold.  Gene felt the world around them fall apart and disappear before returning, reassembling in indistinguishable pieces as Finny pulled away, leaving his lips frozen without summer heat.

They stared at each other for a moment before a wide grin graced Finny’s features and Gene couldn’t help mimicking him, giggling softly.  And as the song faded to the start of a new one, they continued to dance.

#a separate peace #gene forrester #gene x finny #fanfiction #fan fiction #fanfic #writing #my wrtiting #excuse me why does my boy not have a tag #finny ily #this is kinda weird but idk i was feeling it today #so i wrote some gene x finny stuff because ever since ive read asp ive been meaning to but for some reason never did #so i did today #i lowkey love this though #idk why #anyways

[karaliswrites]

Dear Diary

This is weird and stupid

~~~~~

No one knew about my dairy.  I had gotten it when I started middle school with the money I had from my allowance.  It was a way to deal with stress and anxiety and it honestly really helped me.  I usually just scribbled a few notes here and there when I was feeling particularly overwhelmed at school or in general.  It was an escape for me.

And then puberty happened.  And I developed some intense feelings for a particular brunet.  Being fourteen and terrified of literally everything, I freaked out and tried to ignore the way I felt about him.  But being best friends didn’t give me much time to escape him.  So I found myself turning to my diary to vent my romantic frustrations.  Years of repressed feelings came bubbling to the surface in brilliant rainbow waves, dying every page in their wake.  And eventually nearly every page was stained with their colors.  So naturally, whenever he came over, I kept my diary hidden away.  Except for today.

He had asked if he could come over and I had agreed.  I had finished scribbling something in my diary before straightening out my hair and fixing my appearance.  But the doorbell rang before I was done and I had rushed down the stairs, too wrapped up in my excitement to remember to put away my diary.

I let him in and he gave me that smile that made my stomach flutter and we headed up to my room as usual.  I must’ve been distracted with talking when I walked into the room and over to my window because the next thing I knew, he was saying the words I had just written.

“Finals are coming up and I’m feeling stressed again.  I just hope I study enough.  Armin, is this a diary?” he asked with a smirk as if this wasn’t at all serious.  Little did he know, my entire world was going to fall apart if he went back just a few pages.  “Eren, don’t!” I cried, throwing myself across the bed at him, but he stepped back out of my reach.  He flipped the pages and I felt my heart drop.  I ran over to him and grabbed for the book, but he kept yanking it out of my reach.  “Something interesting happened today.  We talked again and I almost did something really stupid.”

“Eren!” I cried, lunging forwards and flailing my arms to no avail.  “Don’t read that!”

He ignored me, continuing to smile and avoid me.  He really didn’t know what was about to happen, did he?  He held the book over his shoulder where I couldn’t  reach.  “Well, I guess it wasn’t so bad.  I don’t think he realized the meaning behind it.  But I invited him to the movies and . . . ,”

I threw my arms around his neck to grab the book, but it was too far and I gave up trying.  I suddenly realized the position we were in and blushed furiously, but I didn’t move away.  It was . . . nice being so close to Eren.  I saw emerald eyes glance furtively across the writing and I knew what he was reading.  I had asked him to the movies a few days before, deciding I would confess afterwards.  We had watched the movie and then gone for a walk in the park and he had looked particularly adorable and it made me want to kiss him.  And I nearly had.  I had been staring at him so long he had taken notice and giggled and asked me some sort of question.  I think I had said I was just worried about finals.  But really I was distracted by warm emerald eyes and full pink lips.

“Armin,” he breathed and I was brought back to the present, feeling weight sink heavy and suffocating in my chest.  “I-I . . . ,” I stuttered and he turned back to me, our noses inches apart.  I swallowed, feeling my blush creep across my entire face and down my neck.  My skin burned and my throat went dry and I licked my lips, trying to catch my suddenly labored breath.  “Um . . . I was go-going to tell you . . . well, I guess you already know, I . . . um . . . .”

I glanced at him then hurriedly to the ground, feeling my pulse accelerate at an alarming rate.  “You . . . wanted to . . . kiss me?” he spoke up and I shut my eyes, nodding sheepishly, my fingers subconsciously messing with the hair at his nape.  I swallowed, waiting for everything to fall apart and take me down as it fell into oblivion.  “You know . . . ,” he muttered gently, but his words shook my entire world.  “I wanted to kiss you too.”

I looked up from the ground and noticed just how close we were.  My heart was in equilibrium and I couldn’t tell if it had stopped or was racing so fast that I couldn’t feel each individual beat.  The world faded away until it was just Eren and I, standing in each other’s air, our breath tangling together.  And then he was kissing me and my heart leaped into my throat before plummeting into my stomach.  I felt like my insides had flipped upside down and twisted into a giant knot full of butterflies.  But then my mind focused solely on Eren and his lips and the way they moved against mine.  They way his hands settled on the small of my back and pulled me closer, the way our stomachs brushed ever so slightly as he kissed me again.

Just as softly as he had come, he pulled away and I felt my lips tingle with the ghost of his kiss.  My eyes fluttered open and when I met his gaze, I couldn’t help letting out a laugh.  I smiled and he grinned, giggling along with me.  He engulfed me in a bear hug and we somehow ended up by my bed.  We fell back onto the mattress as he peppered my face with kisses.  I giggled as he planted his lips to my nose and across my cheeks and forehead and chin before pecking my lips softly.  “You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do that,” he smiled and I raised a brow.  “I think I do.  Have you seen how many pages I filled?”

“Are they all about me?”

“Mostly.”

“Sorry about reading your diary by the way.  I didn’t think it’d be so personal.  But it was still a dick move and I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine,” I laughed.  “I mean it meant I got to kiss you, so I’m not displeased.”

We smiled and he leaned down to kiss me again before sitting up and pulling me against his chest.  “Can I read the rest?”

“Sure.”

“Will you read it to me?”

“If you want me to,” I giggled, taking it from his hands.  He inched closer, his arm draped over my shoulder and I snuggled into his warmth, pressing a kiss to his cheek as I opened to the beginning.  We spent the next few hours reliving my years of embarrassment and infatuation, sneaking kisses in between a few of the entries.

#Eremin #erearu #erenxarmin #eren jaeger #armin arlert #fanfiction #fanfic #snk #shingeki no kyojin #attack on titan #writing #my wrtiting #i thought of this idea when i was half asleep and i wrote it when i was half asleep #so its bad #and weird #but sure #its fine #whatever #i should be writing so many other things #and doing so many other things #but instead i wrote this weird thing

[karaliswrites]

The Daily Prophet

This makes no sense I just loosely based it on that one time Harry and Hermione were in the Daily Prophet.  I don’t know why this would ever happen, but who cares about making sense not me apparently

~~~

Eren opens and closes his mouth as he stares at the newspaper in his hands.  “Wh-what?” he finally manages to stutter and he hears Jean let out a sigh.  “Rita Skeeter.  World’s nosiest reporter.  Trust me, man, she could’ve done far worse.”

“But, I — we . . . ,” he stammers before shoving the newspaper in Jean’s face because he can’t form a proper sentence.  Hazel eyes glance over the print, over the moving picture Eren knows is on the front, before looking back up at his friend.  “What?”

“It’s — wrong — it’s all wrong.  Armin and I aren’t . . . ,” he trails off, turning the paper back around to stare at the front page.  Rita Skeeter had been strangely obsessed with Eren’s every move since she arrived at Hogwarts and he had no idea why.  It was unnerving to think that everything he did was being monitored and written down for the world to potentially see.  But even though Eren had brought his complaint to the headmaster himself, he had just smiled and assured him that no damage would be done.  

So what was this?  What was this picture of his best friend throwing his arms around his neck in a tight embrace, kissing him lightly on the cheek before quickly turning away?  Their photograph counterparts look at each other and then towards him in surprise as the flash goes off and it continues in a perpetual, embarrassing cycle.  Hug, kiss, picture.  Over and over.  Was this not damage?

“You know, it really isn’t that bad,” Jean speaks up and Eren gives him a glare.  “What do you mean, isn’t that bad — are you serious?”

“I mean at least she didn’t catch you two banging in a classroom or something.”

Eren feels his face flush and he’s overwhelmed with anger.  “Jean!” he cries indignantly, but the boy looks at him with a calm gaze.  “I told you we aren’t together!”

“Then I don’t see the problem.  If you aren’t being outed by the Daily Prophet, then why are you getting so worked up about it?”

Eren glares at him silently, opening his mouth to say something before promptly shutting it.  He feels embarrassed and angry, upset and exposed, and it just isn’t fair.  Rita Skeeter shouldn’t be broadcasting his relationships like that.  And what about Armin?  What would happen to him?  Eren’s halfway across the Gryffindor common room before he realizes he’s moving.

He’s walking blind down the corridors, his feet carrying him down a familiar path all on their own.  A cloud of rage and fear sinks over his eyes and it’s all he can see, but then he’s in the library and his gaze falls on someone that makes his vision clear.  He’s sitting calmly by the window in his usual spot, seemingly engrossed in a thick volume of charms or potions.  

Eren marches over to the table where he sits and plops haphazardly into the seat across from him, startling him from his reading.  When ocean eyes meet his, Eren swears he sees him blush before he looks back at the parchment.  “Hi, Eren,” he says and his eyes are glued to the same spot in his book.  “Armin, can I talk to you?” he finds himself asking and when his friend looks up, he looks almost nervous.  “Um, sure,” he mutters, closing the book and placing it off to the side as if expecting their conversation to take place in the library.  Eren quickly rises from his chair and the blond glances up at him, tucking his hair behind his ear.  Without a word, he stands and pushes in his chair.  

Eren isn’t sure where they’re going, but after a short walk, they’re in a secluded corner and it’s just them.  Them and the elephant in the room.  Eren turns to his best friend with butterflies in his stomach, and he takes a deep breath in a feeble attempt to settle their fluttering.  “Have you seen it?”

He doesn’t ask what it is.  “Yeah,” he says softly and Eren isn’t exactly sure where to go from here.  He isn’t even sure why they’re here right now.  “Has anyone mentioned it?”

“No.  But a few people sent me some weird looks, so I’m assuming they know.”

Eren nods his head solemnly and suddenly an apology is spilling from his lips.  “What are you apologizing for?”

“I don’t know.”

They stand in silence a moment before Armin chuckles.  It lacks any mirth.  “If anyone should be apologizing, it’s me.”

“Armin, you don’t have to apologize.  You didn’t do anything.”

“Well,” he breathes, rubbing the back of his neck nervously.  “If I didn’t . . . kiss your cheek none of this would’ve happened.”

Eren’s heart stutters at the word kiss and he swallows.  “Armin, you know what Rita Skeeter’s like.  Even if you didn’t, she’d find some other way to spread rumors about us.”

He’s taking a step forward, just into Armin’s personal space and his mind goes suddenly fuzzy.  “We shouldn’t have to change our lives because of her.  If she wants to spread lies, that’s her own problem, not ours.  Let her say what she wants.”

Eren thinks that this is a dramatic change of heart from just a few minutes ago, but then Armin looks up at him through his lashes and he can’t think anymore.  “But what if . . . what if she’s right?”

Images of Arlert and Jaeger: Are They Dating? and It appears the Ravenclaw at least has romantic feelings for his friend flash through his mind and his heart stops before restarting at a faster pace.  “Armin . . . ,” he starts, but he can’t quite finish, seeing ocean eyes glance nervously up at him before flicking to the ground.  His brain short-circuits, his stomach somersaults, and everything is suddenly surreal, as if he’s in a dream.

When their lips meet, Eren is a bit surprised at what he’s done and abruptly fears that maybe he’s read this wrong.  But then Armin’s lips move gently against his own and he relaxes, placing his hands tentatively on the blond’s waist.  He feels Armin’s fingers curl gently into the front of his robes, pulling him closer so their chests touch.  Eren’s world is spinning and his grip on Armin’s hips and the way one kiss is followed by another is his only tether to reality.

It’s a millennia before they pull away and when they do, they stare at each other, seemingly in disbelief.  Eren tries to think of something to say, but finds his vocabulary has disappeared and he isn’t sure he actually knows how to speak a language anymore.  But thankfully, Armin grins and giggles gently and says something for him.  “I have a feeling we’re gonna be on the front page of the Daily Prophet for awhile.”

Eren chuckles under his breath as the first blur of words returns to his memory.  “I think we will.”

#Eremin #erearu #erenxarmin #eren jaeger #armin arlert #fanfiction #fan fiction #fanfic #writing #my wrtiting #snk #shingeki no kyojin #attack on titan #idk why rita skeeter is writing articles about Eren and Armin #dont think about it too hard #lets just not think about any of this too hard #then its fine #but if you actually think about it you realize wait this wouldn't happen #idk maybe this is an au where Eren is Harry Potter #who knows #anyways #i just thought of this while I was half asleep and was like oh that's a great idea #so i wrote this weird thing #and now that it's done i realize it's a really weird idea #but sure #whatever

[karaliswrites]

Alohomora

I was bored and wanted to write so I did this weird Hogwarts au with my OCs

~~~~~

I made my way across the lawn to the greenhouses, hoping Michael would be there.  I figured he would either have gone into the forest or to the greenhouses and, given that it was already past nightfall, I thought it unlikely that he’d go out in the woods by himself.  I let out a breath, watching it turn to fog in the crisp, autumnal air.  Frost sparkled in the moonlight on the glass of the greenhouse, curling in frozen designs across the panes.  I pressed my fingertips against the door, holding my wand to the lock and whispering, “Alohomora.”

I softly pushed open the door and heard a quiet sniffling in the corner.  “Michael?” I asked gently and heard a gasp.  “Wolf,” came a familiar voice, raspy and raw.  “What are you doing here?”

I chanted lumos under my breath and saw Michael sat in the corner, hurriedly wiping his eyes.  When he saw me, he quickly hid his face in an attempt to hide the tears, but it was too late.  I had already seen them.  “I was looking for you,” I said with a small smile even though it didn’t really seem the time for smiling.  I let out a sigh, moving over to him and sinking to the ground beside him.  We sat in silence for a moment and I listened to his occasional sniffle and the sound of my own heartbeat as I tried to think of what to say.  “Michael, you know what they said isn’t true, right?” I asked, and he pulled the cuffs of his sweater over his fingers.  I continued to stare at him with worried eyes.  I could feel him trembling.  “Michael?”

“They’re right, Wolf,” he muttered and my heart twisted at how broken he sounded.  “No, of course they’re not,” I tried to assure him, but he shook his head.  “It’s true.  All of it.  I r-really am a useless mudblood.”

“Michael, listen to me,” I said, putting my wand at my feet.  “You are not useless, especially because some stuck-up purebloods think they’re better than you.”

“It’s not just that,” he muttered, burying his face in his knees.  “What is it, then?” I asked as gently as possible.  “It’s not just about being a w-wizard,” he croaked.  “It’s being human.  I don’t care if someone thinks they’re better than me when it comes to magic, but being useless in general r-really gets you down sometimes.”

He let out something between a laugh and a sob and I pulled the Hufflepuff into my arms.  He immediately buried his nose in my chest, clutching at my uniform with a tight, trembling grip.  I ran a hand through his ginger hair in an attempt to soothe him.  “You aren’t useless Michael.  Not as a wizard, a human, or anything else.”

I let out a sigh, wishing I could find the right words.  Words that would somehow make everything better, though I wasn’t entirely sure that was possible right now.  “You’re a great person and a fantastic friend.  Hell, if it weren’t for you, I don’t know how I would’ve made it this far.”

I felt his fingers dig lightly into my shoulders.  He smelled like soil and rain, though perhaps that was from the plants surrounding us.  His breathing was shallow and steady, except for the occasional gasp.  I swallowed, becoming increasingly aware of our proximity, and of the sudden shift my feelings for him had taken months ago.  I hadn’t thought about it in awhile, but being here, being this close to him and inhaling his scent, made the feelings resurface until they were all I saw and all I felt.  

He took this moment to lift his head, his pale skin seeming to glow in the moonlight, his hair shimmering burgundy and silver at the same time.  His eyes were a forest I was hopelessly lost in, seeming darker now as he looked at me.  I swallowed, feeling my heart race in my chest and a familiar heat creeping over my face.  His freckles twinkled like constellations across his cheeks, his lashes in stark contrast with his pale complexion.  His lips parted on a breath and I found myself glancing down to them, over the chip in his front tooth and at his tongue as it swept past it.  I looked back into dark green eyes to see them glance to my mouth and back again, making my stomach twist with anticipation.

The trails of his tears sparkled like crystals as he leaned in, pausing mere centimeters from me to glance up at me through his lashes for a sign of rejection.  He didn’t get one.

Our lips brushed together softly and I felt him shiver before he leaned forwards the last bit to kiss me full on the mouth.  The world seemed to melt into warmth and behind my eyelids I could see sparks of light, fireflies fluttering like the butterflies in my stomach.  After a few seconds, he pulled away and looked at me and my heart melted.  I took his lips in mine again, running a hand gently through his hair.  He shifted his weight and leaned into me, pulling me closer by my robes.  

We stayed that way, kissing softly for what seemed like an eternity and mere seconds at the same time.  I finally pulled away and couldn’t help giving him a crooked smile which he returned, making him seem even more angelic.  “I can’t believe I just did that,” he said with a chuckle.  “Me neither,” I replied.

We laughed softly and it seemed as if the rest of the world had disappeared.

#writing #my wrtiting #oc #ocs #my ocs #original characters #my original characters #eh #this is bad #the dialogue is weird and idk what situation this is #but i recently did some sketches of wolf and michael and the others in their hogwartshouses #and i got inspired #idk #i wanted to write comfort i guess #even though im not good at that #michaels a hufflepuff wolfs a slytherin and the others aren't in this but i guess they're important too #i made ricky a gryffindor jim a ravenclaw and ashley a slytherin #in case anyone was wondering #i just remembered all my oc stuff (which isn't a lot) is on my instagram #oh well #maybe the people that read this (if anyone does) will know who im talking about

[karaliswrites]

Reluctant Heroes

I felt like writing angst.  Spoilers

~~~~~

Eren slams into a nearby roof, the skin of his palm grinding against the harsh tiles.  It burns and stings, but he ignores the pain, looking over his shoulder at what remains of Shiganshina.  Buildings have been smashed in the fight and he can see the smoke from his titan form creeping over the rooftops like an omen of death.  He doesn’t know how many of them are remaining, and how many of those are still fighting.  He thinks it’s useless now.  That their efforts are going to be for nothing.

He grits his teeth and lets out a scoff.  Despite the impossibility of humanity’s success in this war, he can’t help feeling like he’s failed.  That if he had been quicker, stronger, then maybe humanity would still have a chance.  A tear runs down his face and he’s surprised he hadn’t noticed he was crying.  He hurriedly wipes away the tears because he can’t cry.  He’s pathetic enough already.  The raw skin on his palm stings as it absorbs the salinity, but right now he doesn’t care.

He looks out across the city, over what he can see of it, looking for any sign of anybody.  But he finds none.  His chest tightens and his heart constricts, wrapping around his throat and squeezing tight.  He suddenly can’t breathe, can’t think.  His friends, his comrades -- everyone is probably dead by now.  The war is over.  The titans have won.

He falls to his knees and slams his hands on the tiles, feeling the impact shake his bones.  He lets out a scream and feels the tears return, quicker this time.  More pathetic.  His body shakes with his sobs and he’s so overwhelmed with a feeling of emptiness he isn’t sure he’s actually feeling anything.  He aches and burns and stings and throbs and it’s absolute agony.  Everything hurts, all at once, as harshly as it can.

“Eren?” a familiar voice calls out and he looks over his shoulder in disbelief.  It can’t be . . .   

He lands on the roof more gracefully than Eren had, blond hair blowing softly in the breeze.  Ocean eyes are dark and stormy, but as they land on him, they calm ever so slightly.  “Eren,” he breathes, rushing over to him and Eren rises to his feet.  He stops before him, seeming as though he isn’t quite sure what to do.  He reaches his hand out and firmly places it on Eren’s shoulder and he feels something again, if only for a moment.  Something happy and wonderful in the midst of all this hell.  “Armin,” he smiles and feels another tear run down his face, his voice quivering horribly.  “Eren, the others, they  . . . ,” he begins gently, but he doesn’t have to finish because Eren already knows.  “We’re the only ones left.”

He grimaces and Eren’s heart shatters.  It’s just them, standing here on the edge of nothing, knowing that tomorrow will probably never come.  He never thought it would come down to this.  “Armin, I’m sorry,” he sobs and the blond takes his other shoulder.  “Hey,” he says with an attempt at a smile, but his voice trembles.  “Don’t say that.  You have no reason to be sorry.”

“I-I’m sorry I . . . couldn’t do this for y-you.”

“Do what for me?”

“This,” he says, gesturing vaguely at the rubble around them.  “I couldn’t win this war f-for you.”

“Eren,” he mumbles, losing the rest of his sentence and letting it fall.  “I was only fighting th-this damn thing to get our freedom b-back.  So we c-could see the outside world.”

Ocean eyes are soft as they look at him and Eren feels his heart ache.  “I’m so s-sorry, Armin.  If it had been another time, a-another world, maybe we could’ve been happy out there.”

“Eren,” he says again and he gets the feeling he should stop talking so he does.  Armin gives him a fragile smile before leaning his head up and pressing their lips together.  The touch is gentle and Eren’s heart melts, his mind going completely clear.  His hand comes up to soft blond hair as Armin’s cups his face, capturing his lips in another soft kiss.  When he pulls away, Eren sees tears shimmering in his eyes, but still he continues to smile.  “I d-didn’t have to see the outside world to be happy.  Not as long as I had you by my side.”

Eren lets out a breath, giving his best attempt at a grin.  It’s easier than he expects it to be.  “Armin,” he mutters, clasping his hand over the one at his cheek.  He leans their foreheads together and he sees Armin swallow, his lips parting softly on a breath.  “I’m scared, Eren,” he says, his voice wavering.  Eren gives his hand a gentle squeeze.  “Me too, Armin.”

He hears Armin let out a quiet sob and squeezes his eyes tightly shut.  “Me too.”

“Promise me,” the blond says, pulling away enough to look at him.  Tears are pouring from his eyes like waterfalls now.  “Promise m-me you won’t leave.  No matter wh-what happens.  Stay by my s-side.”

He lets out something between a laugh and a sob.  “Of course I will,” he says and Armin’s face crumples with sorrow before Eren rushes forwards and kisses him again.  He throws his arms around Eren’s neck, pulling him as close as he possibly can.  Their lips seem to fit together perfectly and Eren wishes he had done this sooner.  Before they were staring death straight in the eyes.  They pull away reluctantly and are suddenly overcome in shadow and when Eren looks, he sees a titan looming over them with blood-stained teeth.  He gulps, feeling fearful of what’s about to happen to them.  Though he’s also somehow at peace.  He knows he’s too weak to shift and even if he did and he managed to get them both out of there alive, what kind of life would they be living?  A life of fear.  A life of pain.  Maybe it was better this way.

He looks back to Armin who shows so much emotion in those ocean eyes Eren loves so much.  He suddenly doesn’t want to die.  He doesn’t want to leave things like this.  He doesn’t want to see the fear and pain written on Armin’s face before things fade to black.  He wishes they could’ve gotten to the outside world.  He wishes they had seen the ocean and he could see that look of wonder in Armin’s eyes once more.  He wishes they could’ve lived a long, happy life together somewhere far from this place.  Far from the titans.

“I love you,” he sobs, clutching Armin’s shoulders tightly.  A tear rolls down his cheek and he sniffles.  “I l-love you too,” he gasps.  He manages to give him one last kiss before they’re being picked up and brought towards open jaws.  Eren looks into his eyes and tries to get lost there as he has so many times before because maybe it’ll distract him from what’s about to happen to them.  They continue to stare at each other as they enter the titans mouth and as its teeth sink into their flesh and the world goes black.

#eremin #erearu #erenxarmin #fanfic #fanfiction #fan fiction #angst #erenjaeger #arminarlert #snk #shingeki no kyojin #attack on titan #writing #my wrtiting #idk i was feeling angsty #i called it that because i suck at titles and was listening to an angsty version of it while i wrote #idk whats happening here #idk what battle this is #i just made it up i guess #i also dont know when this takes place #i just sorta invented everything and hoped it turned out okay??

[karaliswrites]

Will you please be my friend? You are freaking awesome. I love your short stories about Eren and Armin. You are brilliant and I honestly don't know how you don't have more notes in your stuff.

Aw thank you!! And of course I’ll be your friend! I really appreciate that I honestly think the stuff I write is terrible. It really makes me happy to hear that other people enjoy it more than me. Thank you for liking my writing and for being so awesome and nice❤️

[karaliswrites]

Hero

This is terrible and has spoilers

~~~~~

When emerald eyes meet ocean blue, Eren knows he wants to talk.  There’s a solemn, perhaps even stern, look on his face and he gulps nervously.  So much has happened to them in the span of so little minutes that Eren is surprised at how much his stomach churns.  He supposes it’s the fact that he can sense Armin’s anger, the spark of fire in his eyes that he’s only seen on a few occasions.  But he still doesn’t think it’s something to be as afraid of as he pathetically and selfishly is.

It’s after Heichou’s plan to make Historia the queen that they have a second to themselves.  And almost as soon as the conversation is over, Armin’s gripping him by the sleeve and pulling him around the corner and out of sight from the others.  Once they’re alone in the dark, secluded alleyway, he’s being thrown forwards a bit more roughly than he’d like.  Though given the fact that any form of malignancy from Armin is enough to make his heart ache, he supposes it doesn’t really matter.  He stumbles as he tries to catch himself and once he does, he turns to see his eyes downcast.  “What the hell, Eren?” he says with a cool shakiness that makes him swallow despite himself.  “Armin.”

He rushes forward, giving him a curt shove.  “What the hell?!”

“Armin, I —” he tries, but soon his tongue is tripping over itself and no words are able to form on his lips.  “What were you thinking?!” he yells, his fists taking half-hearted swings at Eren’s shoulders.  “What was that about sacrificing yourself?!  That saving humanity shit?!  I can’t believe you!”

“Armin, calm down!” he says, trying to cease the attack on his chest.  He manages to take hold of Armin’s wrists and hold him steady despite his struggles against his grip.  He eventually stops and catches his breath, his fists no longer trembling in resistance.  “Why . . . ?” he mutters, and his voice sounds broken.  “Why did you . . . ?”

“Armin . . . look at me . . . .”

He raises his head, however hesitantly, and when emerald meet ocean, he feels his heart shatter.  Tears flood from sapphire pools and roll hotly down his cheeks.  The sheer agony in his eyes only adds to the exponential hatred he has for himself.  Everything is his fault.  It always was.  “I’m not the hero everyone thinks I am.  They think with my powers, I can save humanity, but they’re wrong.  If . . . if I let Rod Reiss eat me . . . if I restored the power to its rightful place, maybe humanity would actually stand a chance.”

“Eren, those were just things Reiss said to get through to Historia.  He needed her completely on his side and if she saw him as a victim in all this, she would be.  You can still save humanity without their bloodline.”

“How can you be so sure?!” he snaps without thinking.  He sees him flinch, but only slightly.  It still makes his stomach drop.  “For all we know, he could’ve been right about all that!  And even if he’s not, what chance do I have of saving us?!  If anyone should be the hero, it should be Levi or Mikasa — anyone who’s strong enough to be there when they’re needed most!  All I ever do is fuck things up even more than they already have been!”

“Are you even listening to yourself right now?!” he shouts, taking fistfuls of the front of his shirt and Eren’s listening now.  “Do you know how much you’ve done for us?!  How much faith humanity has in you?!”

He hangs his head and mumbles, “How much faith I have in you . . . ?”

Eren feels his lungs constrict in his chest, rendering him completely helpless as he struggles to get enough oxygen.  “You’re not a mistake, Eren,” he says and he’s left speechless at the fact that he’s seemingly telepathic.  The exact thoughts flashing through his mind had somehow become clear to Armin and Eren wonders why it’s always been that way.  But deep inside him, he thinks he knows.  He just doesn’t want to.  “I know how hard it is to think you’re useless.  To think that everyone around you is so much more capable and to wonder why you even deserve to be here.  I’ve felt it all before and I completely understand.”

Armin’s fingers loosen their grip on the fabric of his shirt slightly.  “My entire life, I’ve felt like a burden.  To Mikasa, to the corps, to everyone.  But especially to you.”

He looks up with a sad smile, tears still steady as they run past his lashes and down his cheeks.  “I always thought you were the key humanity needed to survive.  To eradicate the titans.  You had bravery and strength while I had nothing.  I thought . . . you hated me.”

Eren wants to tell him that isn’t true — that it never was and never would be.  But his mouth isn’t moving and besides, he thinks Armin already knows.  “But I realized something.”

He blinks, letting another tear fall across his skin.  “It didn’t matter what I thought of myself as long as you still had faith in me.”

His stomach flips, but this time it isn’t out of fear.  “No matter what happened, you were always willing to entrust your life to me and that was all I needed.  Even if I felt like I didn’t matter to anyone, I always remembered the times you showed me that I did to you.”

He takes a step closer into Eren’s personal space and his breath hitches.  “So even if it doesn’t mean anything to you, I . . . .  You’ve always been a hero in my eyes.  You always have been and probably always will be.  And no matter what comes our way, no matter what obstacles we might face, just know that you’re a hero.  You’re my hero.”

He can’t restrain his tears as they slip from his eyes and he’s suddenly pulling Armin into an embrace he thinks he needed.  The blond’s arms wrap instinctively around him and he buries his nose in golden hair, taking in his scent and feeling himself relax a little.  “Armin . . . ,” he mutters, holding the embrace a bit longer before pulling away.  He brings his hand to press against his cheek, wiping away his stray tears.  “Thank you,” he says sincerely.  Armin smiles and before he knows what he’s doing, he’s leaning forwards and pressing their lips together.  He kisses him back tenderly, wrapping his arms around Eren’s neck like a lifeline.  Their lips slide together like they were meant for each other, prefect and everlasting.  There’s a hint of serendipity Eren thinks, but it isn’t necessarily that.  Nothing about the way their hands pull each other closer, all their passion and grief melting away in one glorious kiss, is anywhere near serendipity.  It’s more like destiny — like a rope that’s tied them together from the start that they’ve now discovered had them connected.  A revelation, an epiphany, a realization that things had always been this way and they were either too young or too dumb to notice.  Perhaps a little of both.

But despite how long they’ve waited for this moment, it has to come to an unfortunate end and they both take a moment to catch their breath.  But then Armin pokes a finger to Eren’s chest and says, “So next time you think about sacrificing yourself, you should consider other people’s feelings.”

“Oh?  And how do other people feel?” he finds himself asking with a grin and he’s amazed at how the conversation went from serious to playful because of a kiss.  “Other people think you’d be stupid to do something like that and if for some reason it went wrong, they’d be drowning in misery.”

“That seems a bit intense, doesn’t it?”

“You know there are people who love you right?”

“Are there?” he asks with mock innocence and the blond rolls his eyes fondly, his fingers toying with the hair at his nape.  “Yes, in fact, there are.”

“Does one of them happen to think of me as their hero?”

“Shut up,” he laughs, giving Eren’s lips another peck.  “You aren’t allowed to use that against me.”

“So you love me, eh?” he avoids the question and giggles at the pout Armin gives him.  He kisses his frown before pulling away to bring him into another hug.  “Of course I do,” he mutters eventually and Eren can’t help smiling into his hair.  “I love you too,” he says and it’s like a weight has been lifted off his shoulders.  And now that years of unspoken words have finally been said, everything seems a little less impossible.

#eremin #erearu #erenxarmin #fanfic #fanfiction #fan fiction #erenjaeger #arminarlert #snk #shingeki no kyojin #attack on titan #writing #my wrtiting #wow what a rollercoaster #one minute they're arguing the next they're comforting and then they get all sappy #makes total sense #totally happens in real life #this is so shitty i hate it #but i was watching season 3 and they looked at each other after the whole thing went down and i was shit that was the gay look #thats the pissed off armin look #thats the i need to talk to you right now look #and i wrote this piece of garbage

[karaliswrites]

Ocean Eyes

I haven’t read this far in the manga so I’m pretty sure these spoilers are inaccurate 

~~~~~ They’re walking together, in the dead of night, when Armin first notices it.  He had glanced over at his best friend, who walked beside him, and had seen his lantern tremble in his grip.  His brow furrows and he subconsciously reaches a hand out, placing it over the brunet’s, who’s quick gaze jumps to him as if he’s been startled.  “Eren,” he says gently, feeling his hand tremble beneath his fingers.  “You’re shaking . . . .”

Emerald eyes turn away and he bites his lip.  “Are you scared?” he decides to ask and his response is immediate.  “What?!  No, of course I’m not scared!” he says loudly and Armin’s heart aches.  “Eren, your hands are shaking.”

“I’m . . . I’m just cold,” he replies, but Armin knows he’s lying.  “My hands are cold.”

“Oh,” he mumbles, deciding not to push him too hard.  “I’m so afraid I haven’t been able to stop trembling,” he says and green eyes glance to him, seeming almost blue in the dark.  “See?” he asks, holding his hand out for the brunet to see and they watch the way his fingers quiver in fear.  “Eren, aren’t you ever scared of the titans?”

He doesn’t answer and Armin swallows nervously.  “I think it’s normal.  The first time I fought a titan, I was so scared I couldn’t even move.”  

He looks to his best friend, feeling his eyes begin to water, but he blinks away the tears.  “That was when you — and our comrades —” he adds, feeling his heart twist uncomfortably at the memory.  “Got devoured.  But Eren, you . . .” he turns to him then, his chest tightening.  “You saved me from getting eaten.  Why did you do that?”

He feels a familiar pang of insecurity, but pushes it down as emerald eyes flit over his face.  “Why wouldn’t I?” he asks as if he’s shocked Armin could think such a thing.  He looks at Eren in mild surprise, feeling something twist in his chest.  “You’re my best friend.  I couldn’t let you die.” 

He smiles smally and tucks his hair behind his ear, feeling his face begin to heat.  “And if I had let you get eaten by another one of those monsters . . . I wouldn’t have been able to live with myself.  Losing you would’ve been hard enough.  But to know it was my fault . . . .”

He nods even though Eren’s staring rather intently at the ground because he knows exactly how that feels.  “I felt the same way,” he says and when green eyes dart to him, he wishes he hadn’t said anything.  “At Trost.  I thought it was my fault.  If I had gotten to you in time, I . . . .”

He has to cut off because even though Eren’s here, alive and breathing, right next to him, he can’t shake the image of him getting eaten from his mind.  And as much as he’s tried to forget the pain and the feeling of his soul being torn from his body when that happened, he can’t.  And he knows if it happens again, he won’t be able to survive.  He never wants to feel that pain ever again. “Armin,” Eren says strongly, reminding him again that he’s here — alive.  “It wasn’t your fault.”

He grimaces, wishing he could believe him.  He decides to speak, hoping it will untie the knot that’s formed in his throat.  “How were you even able to rescue me?  You were . . . severely injured.”

The image of Eren laying seemingly dead on a rooftop, his head bleeding profusely, his leg severed at the knee comes back to mind, but Armin shakes it away.  Eren hesitates for a moment and when Armin looks, he thinks he sees a shadow of something he might recognize.  “It was . . . you.”

“Me?” he asks, unsure of how he manages to speak without stuttering, his cheeks igniting into flames.  “Yeah.  Your eyes.”

“My eyes?” 

 He thinks he sounds a bit like a broken record, repeating Eren’s words back at him as if somehow that’ll help them sink in.  “When we were younger . . . and you showed me that book . . . you were talking about the sea, lands of ice and fire.  You were so full of wonder at everything in the outside world.  There was a sort of glow in your eyes.  Whenever you talked about your dreams, I always noticed it.  It was . . . beautiful,” he says, smiling softly to himself and Armin feels his heart racing in his chest.  “I wanted to see you like that for the rest of time.  I wanted to see you happy, to take you to the ocean.  I wanted all of your dreams to come true.  And that’s what drove me forward.  I couldn’t let you die without making your dreams a reality.  You deserve the world, Armin.  And I couldn’t live knowing I hadn’t given it to you.”

His lungs are having extreme difficulty processing oxygen suddenly.  His isn’t sure what to make of the feelings swirling around in his chest or the nauseating churn in his stomach.  Emerald eyes meet ocean before he turns away, breaking the contact.  “Thank you,” Eren suddenly speaks and Armin asks, “For what?”

“For calming me down.  You always seem to be able to do that.”

Palpitations distract him too much to say anything.  It seems that what he’s feeling is getting worse with every word that falls from Eren’s lips.  His gaze fixes on the brunet beside him and he takes a moment of silent admiration, left completely breathless at the sheer beauty that is everything Eren.  “Pretty soon we’ll get to see the ocean together,” he brings up suddenly and Armin manages a tiny smile, averting his eyes with a blush.  “Yeah,” he says distantly and feels like eyes are burning into the back of his skull.  Hesitantly, he checks over his shoulder to notice Mikasa giving him a look he’s never seen before.  Not really a knowing look but definitely something similar.  She gives a small nod to her side and somehow Armin takes that as message.  He turns to Eren and lets out a quick breath.  “I’m gonna check up on Mikasa, okay?” he asks and the boy nods, something flashing through emerald eyes so fast Armin isn’t sure he’s seen it.  “Okay.”

Armin doesn’t know why Mikasa wants to talk to him and it makes his stomach turn with unease and anxiety.  He doesn’t know why.  It’s just Mikasa.  He turns around and falls into step beside her and they both slow their pace so Eren’s out of earshot.  “How are you holding up?” she asks and he shrugs.  “Fine. Scared, but fine.”

They walk in silence for a moment before Mikasa takes a breath.  “Armin, when are you going to do something about it?”

He feels his heart sink and he swallows nervously, hoping she doesn’t notice.  He decides to feign ignorance.  “Do something about what?”

She gives him a look and he knows she can see right through him.  “Armin, I’m not blind.  Neither are you.”

Armin lets out a sigh, wondering how this conversation was important at the moment.  Shouldn’t they be focused on the mission?  On staying alive?  Shouldn’t Mikasa’s priority be protecting the others instead of helping him address the familiar flutter of his heart?  “We both know he cares for you,” she says, breaking Armin’s train of thought, grey eyes watching the way the wings of freedom sway as Eren does.  Armin follows her gaze and lets out a gentle sigh.  “I don’t know . . . .”

“Armin, one of you needs to say something.  And we all know it won’t be Eren.  He’s still too oblivious to realize what he means to you.”

Armin lets his eyes run over the back of Eren’s figure, feeling suddenly terrified.  “But Mikasa, I can't just tell him.”

“Why not?”

It’s a simple question.  But for some reason, Armin doesn’t know what to say.  He looks at her, ocean eyes darting between grey before turning away with no response.  “Are you afraid of how he’ll react?  Because I can guarantee you he feels the sa—”

“What if he doesn’t?”

The absolute fear in his voice is obvious and Mikasa stares at him with the same blatant stare that screams ‘are you serious?’.  “I overheard some of your conversation.  Did you hear any of the things he was saying?”

“Well, yeah, but—”

“You were what got him up again after slamming into that roof.  You empower him.  He does everything you say and puts full faith in you.  He’s entrusted you with his life, his dreams, his freedom — everything.”

Armin bites his lip and finds the ground to be extremely fascinating all of a sudden.  “His happiness.  His love.”

His heart suddenly leaps and he turns to her, his cheeks reddening.  She smiles softly.  “It’s cute that you still get so worked up about him despite how long you’ve had feelings for him.”

“Don’t be so loud,” he says even though Mikasa isn’t speaking particularly loudly, but more because he desperately wants to change the subject.  “He might hear.”

“Look, Armin, all I’m saying is one day it may come down to life and death.  We never know when that day will come.  Maybe today, maybe tomorrow.  But when it happens, Eren has his powers, so he’ll be able to survive.  But what about you?  What if one day you’re a little too careless, a little too slow, and you get killed?  Imagine how he would feel.”

His heart aches at the thought.  He knows what it feels like to have the only person you really care about die before your eyes.  He never wants Eren to go through that.  “And if you were gone, you would have never said the things that needed to be.  You both need this, and right now only you can change it.  So tell him.  Before it’s too late.”

Of course he can’t deny her point.  So he doesn’t try to, turning to stare at the ground, wondering if maybe he actually should.  Of course, he’s always wanted to tell Eren, but every time he’s gotten close, his heart twists and his throat closes off and he can’t speak.  And he doesn’t want to start, not be able to finish, and not end up getting to the most important part.  But he wants to.  Needs to.  The words have been dying to be spoken and he’s the only one who can help them escape.

---

It’s a few days later, and Armin’s had a small brush with death.  He had gotten a little too close to Eren’s titan form and one of the ones he had knocked out nearly fell right on top of him.  He would’ve been crushed to death.  And it’s this experience that really gets Armin thinking.  He’s been considering what Mikasa suggested, and trying desperately to find the courage somewhere within him, but he never really thought about actually doing it.  But after that, he thinks maybe he really should.  He tosses and turns in bed, the very premise making anxiety settle deep in his gut.  It torments him, keeps him awake with the fear of what might be to come, of what he’ll say.  He does this for hours, turning over and over under the sheets and it’s as if they’re strangling him — he shoves them this way and that but they always come back again in an even more uncomfortable way than the last.  Out of frustration, he throws the covers off of him and sits up in bed, his eyes already accustomed to the dark.  He isn’t sure where he’s going, but he gets up and walks, his feet bringing him down the stairs to the dungeon.  He supposes it’s more of a basement that happens to have holding cells, but he likes to think of it that way.  A dungeon.  A prision.  A place not at all fit for the most amazing person he’s ever known.

Before he knows it, he’s stood in front of his cell, grasping the cold iron bars and wondering why he’s here.  He presses his face through a space between the rods and stops to watch him sleep.  Outside of this moment, Armin might’ve thought that to be a bit disturbing, a bit unsettling.  But here, seeing the way Eren’s shoulder rises and falls with his breathing, he’s again overwhelmed with something like relief.  Relief that he’s alive.  That he’s still with him after everything.  He shifts his weight and jumps slightly as Eren turns onto his other side, now facing the blond.  He takes a moment to examine every aspect of his face and recognize the things he loves about it.  The imperfections, the unique characteristics that make him Eren.  He loves the way chocolate hair is falling over his face, the slight twitch of his lashes against his cheek.  But then those lashes lift to reveal stunning green eyes.  He’s caught off guard, they both are, but Eren has to rub the sleep out of his eyes before the oddity of the situation hits him.  “Armin?” he asks and he offers a small smile.  “Hey,” he breathes, now regretting this decision.  If he had approached him in the lunch hall, in passing, he could’ve shrugged it off if things got too difficult to say.  But it was pretty hard to come up with an excuse for why he was here, alone, in the dungeon in the middle of night except for the reason he’s actually here.  He has nowhere else to turn to.  He has to do this now.  He was in too deep, no turning back. 

“What are you doing here?” Eren asks, standing up and approaching him.  It’s usually a simple question, but Armin feels like his heart is going to pound out of his chest and he’s finding it hard to speak.  “I um . . . couldn’t sleep,” he starts, deciding maybe he can work his way up to it and, in the meantime, work up the courage to actually follow through.  “Me neither,” the brunet breathes with a lopsided grin and something flutters in Armin’s stomach.  “I uh . . . .”

His voice is wavering.  He clears his throat, fingers trembling against the metal of the iron bars separating them.  “Can I . . . can I come in?” he asks, meeting emerald eyes.  He can see an obvious spark of concern there and he understands.  He’s acting strangely, but given the importance of the situation, Armin thinks it’s normal.  But Eren isn’t aware of that just yet.  “Yeah, there’s keys by the stairs,” he says with a nod towards the rack.  Armin walks over and grabs the set of keys, trying not to let them fumble too much in his fingers.  He brings them to the lock on the door of Eren’s cell and turns, pulling it open with a small creak.  Armin steps inside and shuts the door behind him more out of need for some sort of comfort than anything else.  To focus on doing something normal in the hopes that maybe this will just be a normal conversation.  Just like always.  He’d like to believe that but he knows it isn’t true.  Eren gestures to his small cot and Armin hesitantly walks over, sitting down on the uncomfortable surface.  Eren takes a seat beside him and Armin licks his lips.  “You would think they’d keep this place under higher security,” he smiles, placing the keys on Eren’s pillow and out of the way.  He chuckles.  “Yeah, you would think.”

A heavy silence falls over them and to Armin it’s absolutely suffocating.  But then Eren clears his throat and his heart sinks.  “So, what’s going on?” he asks and Armin tries to play it off, more out of desperation since he knows it won’t work.  “There’s nothing going on.”

“Armin, I’ve known you my entire life.  Something's bothering you,” Eren tells him and green eyes are looking at him in a way that holds so much intensity he has to turn away.  He sighs and part of him realizes just how much he wants to get this off his chest.  He fidgets with his fingers and swallows nervously.  “I uh . . . I’ve been thinking,” he starts but isn’t sure where to go.  His face is already starting to heat up and he feels his palms begin to sweat.  “Yeah?”

“I um . . . well there’s something . . . I just . . . .  Have you ever felt . . . weird?” he asks and Eren’s brow furrows.  “Weird?”

“Yeah.”

“How so?”

Armin takes a moment to think about it, tucking a piece of blond hair behind his ear.  “It feels like . . . you’re drowning.  But it isn’t scary.  Well, at least not completely.  It’s more . . . warm and comforting really.  And . . . every time you think of this one person . . . ,” he swallows, not daring to meet Eren’s eyes.  “You sink even deeper.”

There’s another silence and Armin feels like either his entire world is about to fall apart or he is.  “I’m . . . not sure I understand?” Eren asks questioningly and Armin can’t help letting out a laugh, perhaps to relieve the nerves that have built up.  Eren giggles along with him for a moment before they both fall silent again.  “Yeah, I uh . . . I don’t—I mean . . . .  You um . . . I wanted to, uh—you know—I . . . . .  I’ve had a few encounters with death . . . .”

He looks up at emerald eyes and feels a sudden spark of fear, letting out a sort of strangled noise before turning away and burying his face in his hands.  He giggles nervously and grips blond hair in frustration.  Nothing he says is turning out exactly as he wants and it’s making him sound a bit out of his mind.  So he takes a deep breath and sits back up.  “And all of this, everything that’s going on, has really put things into perspective.”

Eren’s giving him his full attention and despite how absolutely terrified he is, how much he’s blushing and trembling, he manages to find it somewhere within him to keep going.  “I’ve um . . . I’ve had a lot of time to think things over.  And . . . and there’s . . . th-there’s something I . . . wanted to tell you . . . .”

Eren inches closer though whether or not this is intentional, Armin doesn’t know.  But it makes his heart beat a bit faster than it already is.  “I uh . . . when I . . . watched you die, I . . . couldn’t control myself.  I couldn’t move.  I was . . . just . . . screaming.  That’s what I remember at least.  Seeing you, losing you . . . and the pain.”

He shakes his head, feeling a dull ache in his chest of something he’s felt before and never wants to feel again.  “I’ll never forget the pain.”

Fingers slip over his own and he’s startled, flinching slightly despite himself.  Eren runs a soothing thumb over the back of his hand and Armin closes his eyes, letting out a shaky breath.  “And . . . it made me realize that . . . well I g-guess I knew but it made me realize . . . h-how important you are to me and uh . . . .”

He wants to disappear.  To go back in time and erase this entire moment. Because it’s time for him to finally say what he needs to, but he doesn’t want to do it.  The fear of rejection and possible hatred plague his mind and his stomach twists in anxiety, but he tries to push it down.  “I . . . there’s something I wanted to t-tell you and . . . at Trost I regretted never s-saying it so um . . . that’s why I want to say I-I . . . .”

There’s something about the total silence surrounding them, the way Eren is staring at him, that makes his heart palpitate with worry.  But he closes his eyes and Eren draws patterns gently on his hand and suddenly he finds his voice.  He looks up and straight into emerald eyes.  “I love you,” he says and as soon as he does, he flushes, his eyes widening before he turns away.  “I . . . r-really do.”

Eren’s silent for a moment and Armin glances to him, seeing an analytical look on his face, as if he’s trying to figure something out.  “I love you too,” he says and the ease with which he says it makes Armin think Eren isn’t sure which type of love he’s referring to and isn’t letting himself jump to conclusions.  This is both a good and bad sign.  Though Armin hopes he’s assuming the love is platonic because he doesn’t want to put himself in danger of having his heart ripped in two (which it definitely wouldn’t be) instead of because he doesn’t want anything to do with it if it isn’t.  “I uh . . . I d-don’t . . . .  I mean of course I love you as a friend but I—“

He cuts off, seeing something flash through emerald eyes and even though he can tell he knows, he decides to finish his sentence.  “I’m . . . I’m in love with you.”

Eren takes a moment of silence to stare in seeming disbelief at the ground.  Armin feels his heart crack.  “Oh god, Eren, I’m so sorry, I just ruined everything, didn’t I?  I knew I should’ve kept my mouth shut, but Mikasa thought you felt the same and I didn’t want to regret not telling you.  I’m so sorry I never should’ve said—”

His rambling is cut short by a swift kiss pressed to his lips.  Armin’s eyes widen in shock and for a moment, he doesn’t know what to do.  Eren pulls away, looking into his eyes and Armin’s heart is beating but now it’s with a much better feeling.  Eren’s lips meet his again, softer this time, and he kisses back tenderly, his hand coming up to tangle in chocolate hair.  He knew he’d always wanted to kiss Eren, but never in his wildest dreams had he expected it to be like this.  Their lips move together as if they were made for each other and it’s like they’ve done this a million times before.  Armin’s immediately addicted to Eren’s kiss and wonders why on earth he hadn’t confessed sooner.  But when they pull away, even though Armin wants to continue, he figures Eren has something to say.  And he does.  “I love you too,” he says with that smile and Armin’s stomach flips.  “Is that what you were so worked up about?” he jokes with a giggle and Armin shoves him playfully.  He chuckles and leans back to take him in his arms again, giving him another soft kiss.  “I was scared you wouldn’t feel the same.”

“I was too scared to tell you I did.” 

He smiles at the blond.  “Good thing you said it for me.”

“You have to make it up to me for that.  I’ve been through emotional hell over the past couple days worrying about this.”

“How about I make up for lost time?” he asks and Armin thinks it’s interesting that they’re both exactly the same.  They can just kiss now.  Ocean eyes dart between green and he can’t help a tiny smirk.  “You have a lot of time to make up for,” he says and Eren is quick to kiss him again, this time a bit more certain.  He wraps his arms around his neck, pulling him closer, subconsciously leaning into the touch of a hand to his cheek.  Each kiss gets more passionate than the last, and soon Eren’s tongue is slipping into his mouth, but he’s not complaining.  He lets out a breathless noise as Eren kisses him harder and he suddenly can’t think anymore.  They fall back onto the cot and Eren breaks away for a moment to give him that same smile.  “This good enough for lost time?” he asks and Armin grabs the front of his shirt.  “Are you fucking kidding me?” he replies with a smirk, pulling him back down for another kiss.  The kisses continue, trailing from lips to necks and even lower, across chests and stomachs and Armin is thanking every god he can think of that he confessed.  And as hips move, moans echo in the emptiness of the dungeon, and names rip from their throats, Armin vaguely makes a mental note to thank Mikasa later. 

#eremin #erearu #erenxarmin #fanfic #fanfiction #fan fiction #erenjaeger #arminarlert #snk #shingeki no kyojin #attack on titan #writing #my wrtiting #haha is that some gay stuff going down right there at the end #i think it is #thank momkasa #what a mom #they had the sec #if you couldnt tell #but we can't have tumblr knowing that now can we

[karaliswrites]

Summer Nights

Why are they always playing Mario Kart

~~~~~

It’s mid-July and school is out.  The days are almost suffocating in their heat and the evenings are warm and sticky, the air filled with the whizz of insects that come out in a symphony when the sun sets.  Armin’s shorts are burning against his skin, the perspiration gathering there reminding him of the annoying fabric that he wishes wasn’t necessary.  The gentle breeze of Eren’s broken fan isn’t nearly enough to cool the room.  It’s even hotter inside than it is out.  Armin shifts periodically, twisting the controller in his hands as they become too clammy and it starts to get uncomfortable in his grip.  But despite the ongoing battle he’s fighting with the heat, he absolutely can’t, under no circumstances, let Eren beat him at this round of Mario Kart.

He concentrates entirely on the race, both out of the surge of competitiveness he’s feeling and also as a distraction against the smothering summer heat.  Though it’s not nearly as hot as it was earlier in the day, there’s something about summer nights that Armin hates more than when the sun is out.  In those times, people turn on the air conditioning and hide from the sun’s harsh rays.  And if there’s ever a time Armin needs to face the blinding glare of the outside, it burns for a moment and then it’s over.  But it’s when everything cools down a little, though not completely — never completely — that Armin feels absolutely asphyxiated.  It’s when it’s not exactly cool, but not exactly hot, just warm enough to cause that prickle of discomfort beneath his skin.  To make his sheets too warm, but the open air not quite cool enough to let him sleep in peace.  It’s when people turn off the sweet sanctuary of the air conditioning and resort to using simple household fans that Armin thinks do a lousy job of eliminating the smoldering heat.  When perspiration is hot on his brow, his lips dry, and he’s unable to sit still for more than five seconds because the summer air settles around him like a blanket.

So when he manages to cross the line a mere second before Eren does, he lets out a warm breath, flashing his best friend a smile.  “I beat you,” he says and sees the brunet roll his eyes, however fondly.  “Whatever.  I was just letting you win.”

“Sure,” he laughs, falling back onto Eren’s bed with a light sigh.  The sudden rush of air from the movement is refreshing, but it’s quickly replaced with a growing discomfort where his back meets the sheets.  He spreads his arms and legs, hoping that maybe the more area he covers, the cooler he’ll become.  It doesn’t really work.  Eren just laughs at him under his breath and lays down next to him with a dramatic flail of his arms that makes Armin giggle.  He sweeps his bangs off of his forehead and spreads blond hair like a halo around his face, trying to expose his skin to rid of the sickening stickiness of the humidity.  He glances over at Eren, seeing his eyes closed, his nose twitching as he breathes softly.  He sees thick lashes dark and elegant against the tan of his cheeks, the shimmer of a thin layer of sweat on his forehead.  His lips are curved into an almost surreptitious smile and he feels his heart swell.  Eren’s chest rises and falls and for a moment Armin thinks perhaps he’s fallen asleep before his lashes lift to reveal stunning green eyes that flick to Armin with a gentle glimmer.

Armin feels his stomach flutter and he swallows, turning away, running a hand over his eyes.  He’s suddenly reminded of the thing that’s been plaguing his mind for the past few months that he’s told himself over and over to forget about.  “Hey, you okay?”

Eren’s voice is strange in the silence.  “Yeah,” he replies half-heartedly, letting out a gentle sigh, turning his head a bit towards his best friend.  “Just tired.”

Ocean eyes meet emerald and he can see a glimmer of skepticism there and bites his lip nervously.  “You sure?”

“Yeah, I’m sure.  Why, does it seem like something’s wrong?”

He’s said too much.  The deception in his voice is subtle, but Eren’s known him long enough to pick up on it.  The brunet shifts onto his elbow and Armin feels a wave of dread wash over him like the summer heat.  Emerald eyes fix on him with such intensity that he feels his cheeks redden, adding to the already unbearable warmth of the surrounding air.  “You’ve been kinda distant these past few months.  We don’t really hang out as much as we used to.”

He tries to come up with something that can get him out of this conversation.  Some excuse that Eren will accept as the truth and they can both forget about.  Something small.  Unimportant.  “Why is that?”

The look in Eren’s eyes makes Armin’s chest tighten in fear and a feeling he’s shoved away for awhile now.  He looks away, glancing hurriedly, frantically, over anything in the room, eventually settling on the fan that gently ruffles the sheets that hang just over the edge of the mattress.  “I don’t know, I’ve just been . . . busy.”

It’s a horrible excuse.  Armin would’ve cursed himself given another situation.  But his heart was palpitating so furiously that he was beginning to think something was seriously wrong.  “Armin,”

The way his name rolls off Eren’s tongue makes a shiver run down his spine and he bites his lip, feeling his eyes beginning to water.  “I’ve known you my whole life.  Something’s upsetting you.”

Armin honestly doesn’t know why he’s so gut-wrenchingly terrified.  Maybe it’s the ostensible prospect that Eren will hate him.  He knows that won’t happen.  He knows deep inside that nothing he can do will ever make Eren turn against him.  But there’s a small part of his mind that’s riddled with anxiety, that fills his thoughts with constant ‘what if’s and worst-case-scenarios.  And just that one shred of doubt, that one miniscule chance that Eren might leave him, abandon him forever, — however unlikely it may be — is enough to make his stomach churn horrendously.

“I . . . um . . . ,” he starts, his voice quivering in fear.  He thinks maybe he can tell Eren the truth.  Just not all of it.  Because if he did, he’d increase the chance of losing his best friend.  Of losing the only person he really cared about.  Everyone else he loved was gone and Eren was all he had left.  He couldn’t lose him too.

“I’ve just . . . there’s something I . . . .”

He looks into emerald eyes and takes a deep breath, trying to form a decent sentence.  “Eren.”

“Yes.”

“You’re my friend.”

“Yes.”

He lets out a giggle despite himself.  “Eren, come on, this is a serious conversation.”

“Okay, okay, I’m sorry.  Just trying to lighten the mood.”

He settles on his elbows, scooting a bit closer to Armin, but he isn’t sure whether or not this is consciously done.  He’s still on his back and squirms under Eren’s gaze, feeling himself blush and the fabric of his t-shirt press warmly against his stomach.  He swallows.  “I really . . . we’ve been friends for years now.  You know me better than probably anyone else.  You wouldn’t . . . walk out on me, would you?”

“What?” he asks, his seemingly nonchalant position stiffening into one of solemnity.  “Why on earth would I do that?”

“Just . . . I dunno.  If I ever did something . . . you thought was . . . disgusting . . . .  Something that would make you hate me . . . .” he mutters, his throat beginning to knot with anxiety.  “Armin,” he says strongly and he can’t help meeting emerald eyes.  “There’s nothing you could ever do that would make me hate you.  And I would never think you were disgusting.  You’re important to me and I’d never walk out on you because of something stupid like that.”

He feels a gentle smile tug at the corners of his mouth, but can’t find it within him to complete it.  “I just . . . I’ve been thinking . . . .”

Eren doesn’t say anything.  He just sits silently, watching him — waiting for him — like there’s nothing else but the two of them and the relentlessness of the humidity.  “I’ve never been . . . completely honest with you — well, with myself.”

His brow furrows.  “How so?”

Armin lets out a strangled laugh, but it’s more rueful and self-deprecating than anything else.  “I’m making this sound so much worse than it is.”

“Well, if it’s this hard for you to tell me, then it must be pretty serious.”

“I know.  I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry.”

He glances at him again and thinks he sees a flicker of a smile.  “There’s nothing you should be sorry for.  Just take your time and when you feel you can tell me, tell me.  You don’t even have to if you don’t want to.”

“I want to,” he says hurriedly, inching closer to him out of instinct before shrinking back.  “I’m just . . . scared.”

“Of what?”

“Of you . . . leaving me forever . . . .”

“Armin —”

“I know you won’t,” he adds quickly.  “I know you wouldn’t.  But there’s still a part of me that . . . thinks you might.”

They sit in silence a moment and Armin takes a few deep breaths.  “I . . . I’ve always been . . . different . . . than other people,” he begins, deciding he might as well take it in parts.  “I never really knew what it was.  And it wasn’t necessarily a conscious recognition either.  But as I got older . . . I realized that . . . not everyone was like me.  That I was the outcast in a whole world of other people.  When I was young, it never really hit me.  But recently, I’ve been thinking it over and . . . I’ve kinda been denying it my whole life, but I’ve realized I have to come to terms with it one way or another.  And . . . I uh . . . .”

He meets emerald eyes and swallows.  “I’m . . . I’m gay.”

Saying the words aloud gives him validation of how absolutely true they are.  Eren gives a brief nod, as if he isn’t sure if there’s more Armin’s going to say, but after a few moments of silence, he gives a small reassuring smile.  “Okay,” he says and Armin rolls his eyes fondly, feeling a bit lighter with that off his chest.  “That’s all you’re going to say?” he jokes and Eren grins.  “No, I wasn’t done.  But seriously, I’m not upset.  I’m glad you told me.  That takes a lot of courage and . . . thank you.  For trusting me.”

He feels his heart leap and sends him a soft smile.  “You’re welcome.”

There’s a moment of silence and acceptance before Eren breaks it.  “But, uh, if you don’t mind me asking,” he says and his tone is light with an intimation of a question that Armin isn’t sure he wants to hear right now.  “Is there any particular reason you decided to tell me?  Is there a, uh . . . .”

He nudges Armin with his shoulder, inadvertently sending shock waves through his body.  “There a guy you like?”

They giggle at the childish situation and Armin’s lips move for him.  “Maybe.”

He hadn’t meant to say it.  And now that he has, he wishes he didn’t exist.  His face flushes bright red, but Eren doesn’t seem to notice.  “Really?!  Oh my god, who is it?!  Tell me!” he says excitedly and Armin can’t help giggling at his exuberance.  “I uh . . . I dunno . . . .”

“Oh come on, Min!  I won’t judge, I swear!  Unless it’s Jean.  Then I’ll definitely judge.”

He laughs and thinks it’s interesting that Jean is his first guess.  “Ew, no!  I would judge myself if that ever happened.”

“Marco?  Connie?”

“You’re really gonna do this to me?”

“Please?”

They go back and forth in the gentle breeze of the fan for quite some time before Eren pouts.  “You won’t tell me?”

“I mean . . . it’s kind of . . . I dunno, weird.”

“Alright, well, can you at least tell me about him?  Anything.”

“Um . . . what do you want to know?”

“Is he tall?”

“I . . . guess?  He’s taller than me, so . . . .”

“Is he hot?”

Armin laughs at this.  “What — it’s a genuine question!” Eren giggles in retaliation and something like mock offense.  He tucks his hair nervously behind his ear.  “I mean . . . I think he is . . . .”

He blushes profusely and Eren just grins.  “What’s your favorite thing about him?”

Armin has to take a moment.  He’s never really thought it through.  “I — just . . . everything,” he says and when Eren doesn’t snort at the cheesiness, he continues, partly to Eren, partly to himself.  “He’s funny, he’s kind — he seems kinda intimidating on the outside, but once you get to know him, he’s got the biggest heart in the world.  I love his smile, his laugh, his eyes. . . .  And he’s good to me.  I mean, he treats me like I mean the world to him.  Which I probably don’t.  We are friends and all, but I don’t think he feels the same way about me as I do for him.”

“You never know,” Eren says and Armin looks up to see a spark in his eyes that makes his breath hitch, his heart flipping with the implication he might be detecting in his voice.  “Maybe he secretly likes you too.”

There’s no way.  He isn’t implying anything, Armin’s just getting his hopes up.  He looks at Eren a moment and he holds the contact before the boy shakes his head and lets out a sigh.  “No, I don’t think so.  He’s incredible — he doesn’t deserve me.  He’s straight anyways.  He could have any girl he wanted, why would he settle for someone like me?”

Though his question is rhetorical, Eren answers it anyways.  “Well, believe it or not, you’re pretty damn amazing.”

He feels his cheeks flush and Eren shuffles even closer, just a step over the line between casual and intimate.  “And if he’s smart, he likes you back and he won’t be settling for anything.”

Once again there’s a hint in his tone that suggests he knows exactly who Armin’s talking about, but that’s impossible.  “Do you ever . . . think about him?  Dream about him?” he asks and the question is both innocent and verging on suggestive.  Armin feels his breath hitch and he lets it out shakily, simultaneously loving and hating the proximity between them.  “I . . . I think about him all the time.  Dreams too.  Mostly they’re sweet dreams — about him holding my hand, asking me out, taking me on a date, . . . kissing me . . . ,” he trails off, allowing himself to quickly glance at Eren’s lips and mentally scolds himself for being so stupid.  He swears he sees emerald eyes do the same to him and swallows in something like nerves and anticipation.  “That was always the one thing I wanted to do with him.  More than anything else.”

Emerald eyes flit between his own before he mutters, just above a whisper, “Then do it.”

It’s the tone in his voice that lets Armin know he’s caught on.  He’s known Eren long enough to be able to detect even the most subtle of hints in his voice that can tell him exactly what he means.  And this time, he flushes profusely, his tongue darting out to quickly lick his lips.  His heart is pounding almost painfully in his chest and he can feel himself trembling as he inches closer to Eren.  He doesn’t do anything, just sits there with silent, knowing eyes, and Armin suddenly fears that maybe he doesn’t know Eren so well after all.  That maybe those little tones of voice he thought he knew so well are actually not anything to go on.  But he’s gotten an open invitation, whether or not it’s meant for this specific situation, and Eren’s lips are so tantalizingly close that he can’t control himself any longer.  Without any further hesitation, he leans the rest of the way forwards and gently presses his lips to Eren’s.  The touch is almost unnoticeable it’s so delicate, but it sends a spark through him all the same.  After a few moments, he pulls away, lifting his lashes to stare into emerald eyes.  He just looks at him, silent, unmoving, and Armin really thinks he’s messed up.  But then he gives him that lopsided smile he loves before capturing his lips again, this time with a bit more certainty.

Armin feels electricity rush through him, all the way to his fingertips where it fades into numbness.  His brain goes fuzzy and all he can register is Eren and the way their lips move together perfectly.  Like they were made for each other.  They set a slow pace and everytime they pull away, they come back again — softly, gently, and Armin absolutely melts.  He feels Eren’s hands settle on his waist, pulling him forwards ever so slightly, and he can’t help reaching up to chocolate hair, lightly mussed and sticky with humidity.  Part of him begins to doubt this is actually happening — that the thing he’s dreamed about for years is finally coming true.  But Eren’s hands are tangible against his skin and for once, he ignores the heat burning under his touch.  This is too incredible for him to care.

He makes a humiliating sound, something between a sigh and a whimper, as their movements become quicker.  It’s only a slight change, but Armin’s suddenly breathless, trying to keep up with the pace Eren’s setting.  He feels his tongue lightly sweep the seam of his mouth and he gently parts his lips to let it inside to meet his own with a scorching heat.  It isn’t rushed or sloppy — although Armin can feel something like desperation beginning to burn somewhere in his gut.  The dance of their mouths and added heat of their proximity is a bit inexperienced and thus a bit awkward, but only slightly — and either way, it wouldn’t matter.  It wouldn’t be able to mask the pure exhilaration that the tenderness of the kiss brings.  It’s a momentary eternity before they pull away, faces flush, breathing ragged.  Eren’s hands are still firm on his hips and he twists his fingers in the front of his shirt, simultaneously knowing this is a good place to stop and not really wanting to.  Now that he’s had a taste, he’s immediately addicted.

Eren gives him that lopsided smile that makes his heart flutter and tackles him in a bear hug, falling back on the mattress.  Armin can’t help giggling, returning the embrace and burying his face into the front of his shirt despite the summer warmth.  They lay there a moment, trying to fight off the growing heat between them where their skin is pressed together.  “So it’s me, huh?” Eren speaks up and Armin grins into the fabric of his t-shirt.  “Wasn’t that obvious?”

Although he can’t see him, he knows Eren is smiling.  “Armin Arlert likes me.”

“Eren, we literally just kissed.”

“And, if you don’t mind, I’d like to continue doing so for as long a humanly possible.”

Armin raises his head and looks at Eren with mirth in his eyes.  “Is this your way of asking me out?”

“Sort of?”

He giggles and falls back into the comfort of Eren’s arms.  “Is that how I asked you in your dreams?”

“No.  It was a bit more romantic than that.”

“What, like, ‘Armin Arlert, would you please do me the honor of becoming my boyfriend?’”

“Something like that.”

“Wow, I sound so cheesy in your dreams.”

He laughs again, pulling slightly away from Eren despite not wanting to to escape the discomfort his body heat is bringing.  “Where did we go?  For our first date?”

Part of him wants to laugh and he manages a soft chuckle before replying with a grin, “The ocean.”

“We’re going tomorrow.”

“Eren, you can’t drive.”

“I’ll find another way.”

He presses a warm kiss to the top of his head before laying back on the sheets in a more comfortable position.  Armin smiles softly and feels his eyelids become suddenly heavy with humidity and exhaustion.  He lets out a quiet yawn that Eren makes some sort of remark about, but he’s verging on unconscious and isn’t hearing too clearly.  The last thing he registers is Eren kissing him softly on the head again before he falls into the loving embrace of sleep.

#eremin #erearu #erenxarmin #fanfic #fanfiction #fan fiction #erenjaeger #arminarlert #snk #shingeki no kyojin #attack on titan #writing #my wrtiting #why do i hate on jean so much in these things jeez #i dont know what this interaction is #i dont know why they're always playing mario kart #but sure #there was something else i was gonna say but i dont remember what it was

[karaliswrites]

Lost

This has spoilers but they probably aren’t what actually happened

~~~~~ Eren finds some time to himself after dinner.  He manages to wave off Mikasa’s questioning of his destination by claiming he was tired and was going to the barracks because he needed some rest.  This is partially true.  Though that’s not the reason he’s going.  Eren’s not sure why he expects him to be there.  He just does.  So he reminds himself of how awful he feels, the mix of emotions swelling in his chest that need to be put into words or they’ll surely kill him.  He remembers why he’s doing this, why he feels it’s so important and decides he hopes he really is there.  But some part of him, some heavy weight in his heart, doesn’t want him to be.  He supposes he just doesn’t want to face the full consequence of what he’s done.  He doesn’t want to answer any tough questions that might be asked of him because he’s honestly not in the mood.  He had almost lost his best friend.  And he isn’t really that enthusiastic to talk about it.

As it’s still early, no one’s in the barracks.  Eren lets out a sigh of relief, but feels his chest tighten uncomfortably.  He still has to do this, whether he likes it or not.  He’s not sure if it’s his best friend or himself that needs this.  Maybe a little of both.  He’s frustrated with this feeling of sorrow.  This feeling of guilt.  He’s tired of thinking that there might’ve been something else he could’ve done.  But there wasn’t.  It was either this or the death of the most important person in his life.  And he was never going to let that happen if it killed him.

He takes the other door out of the barracks and isn’t sure if he’s looking for something or just wants a breath of fresh air.  But he finds who he’s been looking for and his heart suddenly sinks.  He’s just sitting there, staring up at the night sky, blond hair shimmering in the moonlight.  Eren tries to tell himself to turn around and walk away — to see the serenity of the moment and leave him to it as it was rare for them to ever be at peace.  But something makes him stay. 

He lets out a gentle sigh, walking over to the blond and taking a seat next to him.  “Hey,” he breathes nervously.  He looks over with a gentle smile.  “Hey.”

The tension eats at him, tearing him apart piece by piece so he decides to beat around the bush a little, just to break the silence.  “Nice night,” he says awkwardly, following his gaze up to the stars.  “Yeah, it is.”

It doesn’t get much better.  Eren isn’t sure if the silence is only incredibly uncomfortable to him or if they both pick up on it.  He fidgets with his fingers nervously, glancing over at his friend and stopping there a moment.  He sees the familiar waters of his ocean eyes and the gentle curve of a smile.  He notices the faint freckles that dot his cheeks like constellations and the darkness of his lashes that contrasts elegantly against pale skin.  His heart aches. 

He takes this moment to turn to Eren, immediately catching his gaze.  “What?” he asks gently and Eren has difficulty breathing.  He remembers that day.  He remembers the plan and thinks of how it was part of it all along.  He was willingly going to sacrifice himself for them.  For him.  He remembers screaming and being pulled away, staring helplessly at the charred body of his best friend.  He remembers pleading, begging the captain to save him because he can’t lose him, not again.  But it’s as if the entire thing was a bad dream.  He’s here — alive — right in front of him and Eren must’ve been taking too long to answer because his brow furrows.  “What’s wrong?”

Eren wants to say that nothing’s wrong.  He wants to tell him that everything’s fine and always will be.  But he knows that’s not true.  So despite his nervousness, despite the sick feeling settling in his stomach, he clears his throat.  “Do you . . . do you remember anything?  From that day?”

He doesn’t need to ask what day it is.  Shadows dance across his eyes and Eren hates that he’s the one who put them there.  “Not really.  But I’ve heard things.  From the others.”

Eren thinks that’s the worst way for him to find out, but there’s nothing he can really do about it.  He doesn’t want to pry, but needs to figure out how much he knows.  “What’ve they told you?”

“That Bertholdt’s dead.”

His voice wavers.  “That I killed him.”

“Armin, that’s not what happened,” he says and when he turns his head, ocean eyes are watering.  “Tell me.”

Eren sighs, not wanting to go into details, but he will.  Because he needs to know.  “You really want to know?”

He nods firmly.  “Well, everything went according to plan.”

He lets out a laugh but it’s more rueful and self-deprecating than anything else.  “Or at least the part of it I knew.  But then things went wrong.  You got burned pretty badly.  You were on the brink of death and we . . . .”

He has to take a moment to steady his voice, taking a deep breath and feeling a hand slip gently over his own.  “We . . . we had some serum.”

Eren can’t bring himself to look at Armin’s face but he can tell he’s figured it out.  He continues anyway.  “Heichou wanted to inject Erwin . . . ,” he trails off, feeling a wetness build on his lashes.  “I’m sorry, Armin.”

He sobs and Armin moves closer, wrapping an arm around him and Eren realizes how much he’s missed his touch.  “No, Eren, don’t be sorry.”

“Armin, I made you into a monster.  I turned you into one of those beasts, just like what happened to me.  What right did I have to do that?  To bring you back to life just so you could suffer?  To bring you back to this hell and give you these powers that I still don’t know how to control?  To bring you back to watch everyone around us die because I couldn’t see my life without you.”

His breath hitches as he realizes what he’s said.  Armin’s grip on his shoulder tightens.  “I was being selfish.  I should’ve thought about you instead.  I should’ve thought about the consequences and the absolute misery you would go through if I brought you back and I’m sorry.  I’m so sorry,” Eren sobs as he buries his face in Armin’s chest.  He wraps his arms around his best friend and feels horrible that he’s somehow happy.  He’s happy to have him back in his arms, alive and breathing, hearing his heart beat in his chest and feels incredibly selfish.  “I understand.  I would’ve done the same thing.”

He feels fingers run through his hair and suddenly remembers Trost.  He remembers crashing onto the roof, hearing Armin scream, rushing to save him before he was eaten alive.  Only to be eaten himself.  The image of the blond’s face before the titan’s jaws had slammed shut flashes through his mind and he has to stop himself.  He never wants to see Armin like that.  Especially not because of something he did.  He doesn’t want to bring it up and remind him of what happened, but finds his mouth moving for him.  “Mikasa and Connie . . . told me about Trost.”

He feels Armin stiffen and he swallows.  “They told me about how upset you were and what you . . . what you almost did . . . .”

He still doesn’t say anything and Eren shatters.  “Armin, I’m so sorry.  I’m so stupid.  All I do is cause you more pain than everything else you have to deal with.  I don’t think, Armin.  I just act.  But I should stop and think because whatever I do always ends up hurting you and I don’t want that.  I don’t ever want to do that to you again.  I never want to push you to the brink of almost kill—”

He cuts off because he can’t bring himself to say it.  He continues without it.  “You didn’t deserve this.  You don’t deserve this.  I got you into this mess, it’s all my fault.  I’m sorry.”

“Eren, it’s not your fault.”

He doesn’t believe him, but doesn’t say that.  He’s just silent, pulling out of Armin’s grasp enough to look at him and see glimmering eyes and a broken smile.  “I was the one who wanted to join the scouts, remember?  Technically, I’m the one who got myself into this.  Into all of this.”

Silence settles over them like an old friend but Eren doesn’t enjoy its company.  He bites his lip and furrows his brow but then Armin speaks again, “Do you know why I joined the scout regiment?”

Eren shakes his head because as a matter of fact, no, he doesn’t.  He never did.  Armin’s fingers brush his and ocean eyes dart to the ground.  “I wanted to stay with you.”

He feels his heart skip a beat.  “No matter where you went, I was going with you.  I had promised myself that years ago.  Because I couldn’t live without you.  That’s why, at Trost, I . . . .”

Eren gently squeezes his hand, silently urging him to skip over it and continue.  Armin grimaces.  “I couldn’t function — couldn’t breathe — without you there.  I completely lost it.  You were the only thing worth living for and when I thought you were gone, I . . . had nothing else.  I couldn’t see myself going on without you.”

Eren thinks this is very similar to his current situation and he isn’t sure if he thinks the irony is just cruel or perhaps trying to tell him something.  “I felt so hopeless.  I felt like my soul had been torn from my body and I was hollow.  Like a piece of me was missing.  I just felt empty.”

Their gazes meet and Armin bites his lip.  “So I don’t blame you for saving me.  Even though I was willing to die.”

“Why?” Eren blurts.  He smiles.  “To protect you.”

His chest tightens and once again the irony hits him. He’s always felt the need to protect Armin.  He’d done it his entire life.  Even when it was the mere chance of any possible danger, Eren was on it in seconds, no matter the cost.  And now Armin was doing the same for him.  He had put his life on the line.  For him.  “I knew there was no way you were getting out of there alive.  Not with things going the way they were.  So I planned to do whatever it took to protect you.  Even if it meant risking my life.”

Eren looks up and studies Armin’s face again.  His eyes are watering and they shimmer a deep blue in the moonlight.  He examines the way his hair falls and perfectly frames his face.  He looks the same yet somehow different.  Like he’s always been as beautiful as he is right now and Eren just hasn’t noticed.  In a way, he hasn’t.  But really it’s that he has, he just tries not to think about it.  But now he can’t help noticing the smoothness of his skin, the warmth of his touch, the pink of his lips.  “I had already lost you once,” his voice interrupts Eren’s train of thought.  “I wasn’t losing you again.”

Eren leans forwards and crashes their lips together.  He weaves a hand through blond hair as Armin kisses him back just as eagerly, his fingers running up Eren’s arm and to the back of his neck.  His heart is beating so hard, he thinks it might just burst out of his chest and straight into Armin’s lap.  He knows it’s physically impossible, but it seems incredibly real in this situation.  Their lips move together in a gentle but desperate rhythm, the years of wasted time suddenly picked up on.  Eren has no idea why he hasn’t done this sooner as he tentatively licks at Armin’s bottom lip, slipping his tongue inside when he parts his lips.  He lets out a small whimper and Eren feels his stomach flip, landing rather ungracefully and leaving a fluttering twist in his gut.  Tongues dance, Armin’s skin soft under his fingertips, and Eren can’t bring himself to pull away.  He has to breathe.  The burning sensation in his lungs is enough to tell him that.  But still he kisses Armin, pulling him closer, feeling the blond’s lithe fingers grab hold of the front of his shirt.  Their movements quicken as they try to get the most out of the next few seconds they have of remaining oxygen.  Eren tries to drag the kiss out as long as he possibly can, but it eventually comes to an unfortunate end as they pull away, trying desperately to catch their breath.

Eren isn’t sure this is reality.  His hands are still firm on Armin’s shoulders, but even the tangible feel of his uniform beneath his fingers isn’t enough to convince him that what just happened actually did.  Ocean eyes stare into his, a storm of emotion brewing in them, but from what Eren can see, none of them are bad.  He sees a bit of surprise, maybe something like breathlessness, and something else that he knows he’s seen before.  Something he’s noticed, but never been able to name, though perhaps now it’s beginning to make some sense.  He sees a smile grace his features and finds himself mirroring the action, leaning their heads together gently.  “You won’t lose me,” he says, parting Armin’s bangs and pressing another soft kiss to his forehead.  “I’ll make sure of that.” He sees another glimmer of a smile and kisses his lips again before Eren pulls the blond into his arms and their hearts settle into a steady rhythm, beating together as one.

#eremin #erearu #erenxarmin #fanfic #fanfiction #fan fiction #erenjaeger #arminarlert #snk #shingeki no kyojin #attack on titan #writing #my wrtiting #im paranoid that when i write about things ive spoiled for myself that i actually have no idea what im doing #that i got it wrong and someones gonna be like um actually #anyway #hopefully this is right #i sorta wrote about a lot of stuff so

[karaliswrites]

Confessions

I actually really like this one..

~~~~~

A spring breeze blows gently across the sparring grounds and Eren finds him standing alone, leaning against the railing of the porch.  He doesn’t particularly have anything to say, but his feet bring him forwards, ocean eyes glancing towards the source of the footsteps as if he’s been startled before he relaxes.  He gives a soft smile.  “Hey, Eren,” he says before turning back to the sky.  Eren stands beside him, folding his arms and following his gaze.  The clouds seemingly glow golden in the light of the setting sun, the sky itself an incredible mix of pink, orange, and red.  Eren has always found sunsets to be beautiful and vaguely wonders why he hasn’t taken the time to look at any recently.  He looks over at his best friend and wonders the same thing.

His blond hair is shimmering in the gentle sunlight like gold laced in honey.  It perfectly frames his face and when Eren looks he sees the constellation of light freckles across his nose, the soft curve of his smile, the ocean eyes sparkling in the fading light.  Eren loves seeing Armin like this.  When he isn’t worrying about a mission or training, when it’s just him and this eternal moment.  When he loses himself in his own world whenever he observes the one around them in silent serenity.  Blue meets green and Eren hurriedly turns away, feeling his face heat as he flushes in embarrassment and maybe something else.  Armin doesn’t say anything and though Eren isn’t looking at him, he knows he’s smiling gently the way he does when he’s around.  It’s a smile that only he has ever seen and he isn’t quite sure why he never thought about it much before.  It’s the one he thinks looks best on him.  “It’s nice,” he speaks without meaning to.  The blond meets his gaze with a slightly puzzled look and he clarifies, “The — sky.”

Armin lets out a gentle sigh, looking back at the sun as it sets over the tops of the trees.  “Yeah...,” he breathes like he’s distracted.  Eren glances over him again before clearing his throat.  “Armin...do you have feelings for anyone?”

Blue eyes fill with something he seems to recognize, but isn’t sure how to name.  The light blush that dusts his cheeks is stunning, but it might seem less so depending on how he answers.  He smiles softly.  “What?” he almost laughs and Eren hates how nervous he feels.  “I was just...wondering.  I thought maybe….”

Green eyes dart between blue.  “You had feelings for Historia.”

Armin giggles and Eren notes it sounds almost as if he’s relieved.  “Why would you think I like Historia?”

Eren shrugs because even he doesn’t exactly know the answer to this question.  Maybe it’s because he’s overheard the other cadets going on and on about how she’s the most gorgeous person in the corps.  Eren doesn’t agree with them.

“I don’t know.  I guess she’s just...turned your head a couple times.”

He smiles and looks at the landscape again, letting a soft sigh fall to the railing and melt there.  “No.  Though I will admit she’s really pretty, I don’t like her anymore than a friend.”

His heart skips a beat.  He swallows nervously.  “Do you...do you feel that way about anybody?” he asks and the blond hesitates, visibly stiffening before he replies, “Maybe I do.”

Somehow Eren knows that actually means he does.  His curiosity gets the better of him.  “Who is it?”

Armin lets out a laugh.  “Eren, what’s up with you?  Why do you want to know who I like?” he asks, but there’s no bitterness in his voice.  “Am I not allowed to know things about my best friend?” he replies with mock offense, though somewhere deep inside he feels a spark of fear.  He giggles before falling silent, looking at the ground.  “So who is it?”

He looks at him then and Eren gets the feeling he’s not going to answer any of his questions, so he decides to guess.  “Is it Mikasa?”

“No!” Armin laughs, tucking a piece of hair behind his ear and Eren’s suddenly breathless.  “No, it’s not Mikasa.”

“Annie?”

“No.”

“You said it wasn’t Historia….  How about Ymir?”

“No, Eren.”

“Sasha?”

“No!” he laughs and Eren’s heart suddenly stutters.  Those were all the girls.

He scrunches up his nose in disgust.  “Don’t tell me it’s horseface.”

“Oh my god, no!  Ew, no.”

“Connie?  Reiner?”

“No, Eren, I don’t like any of them.”

Things fall silent for a moment and Eren isn’t sure what to say.  He still isn’t sure if his suspicions are correct, but the people in their friend circle are slowly dwindling and there’s only a few options left.  “And you aren’t gonna tell me?”

He raises a finger to his lips and looks up at the clouds as if he’s thinking it over.  “I guess it depends.”

Eren gives him a look, but he just laughs, picking idly at the fabric of his cuff.  “What about you, Eren?” he asks innocently, but it hits him like a tidal wave.  Armin turns to him with that smile on his face, his eyes glowing with something he knows he’s seen before.  “Do you have feelings for anyone?”

He feels his heart flip and he averts his gaze.  “Yeah.  Yeah, I do.”

“And I’m assuming you won’t tell me who it is either.”

Eren gives him a playful shove and he giggles, steadying himself on his feet.  “Alright, well can you at least describe them?  What about them made you start liking them?” he tries, leaning on the railing beside the blond.  He bites his lip as if considering where to start.  “Well, they’re probably the kindest person I know.  I guess ever since the first time we met, I’ve always felt something towards them, as cheesy as that sounds.  But I don’t think it was actual romantic love until later.  At first, it was just platonic love, but as time went on, I realized it was much more than that.  They’ve always treated me like I meant something and that really got to me.  Even if I felt I was a burden, even if I felt weak, they always went out of their way to make me feel special.  It was sweet.”

Eren glances at the blond to see a smile there that he wants to see for the rest of his life.  “I admire them.  They’re brave, strong, a great leader too.  I don’t think they realize how incredible they actually are, but to me...they’re perfect.”

He isn’t sure what he’s feeling.  Part of him is anxious and giddy with a sort of sheer, unadulterated hope he didn’t know he possessed.  But another part of him is terrified that he’s reading things wrong and his entire world is about to fall apart on top of him.  “What about you?  Why’s this person so special to you?” Armin asks and Eren blinks.  “I guess...they just...get me.  They’re amazing.  Not to mention how incredibly attractive they are too.”

Armin giggles and Eren smiles softly to himself before he continues.  “They listen to me when I need to get something off my chest and calm me down if I ever get out of control.  They’re kind, caring, smart — incredibly brave even though they don’t think so.  They mean a lot to me.  I want to see them happy.  A smile, a laugh, anything and my day is a little bit brighter.  They give me something worth living for.”

He sees Armin’s brow furrow ever so slightly, his face falling.  If Eren didn’t know him so well, he probably wouldn’t have noticed.  “You...don’t have anything else to live for?”

Eren shifts uncomfortably.  “I...nothing’s as important to me as they are.  No matter how obsessed I seem with killing the titans, in the end, it’s all because I want them to be safe.  I want them to live in a world where they don’t have to be afraid.”

“This person really means a lot to you,” he mutters partially to himself.  “Yeah.  They do.”

Armin swallows.  “Is it Mikasa?”

“Oh, you’re doing this to me now?” he asks with a grin and Armin shoves him playfully.  He laughs.  “No, it’s not Mikasa.”

“Let me guess, Historia?” he asks with a look and Eren shakes his head, his heart seeming to beat faster with every eliminated possibility.  They cross out the girls and move on to the guys and Eren feels his heart might actually explode.  “Jean?”

“Ew, no, not that stupid horseface.”

“Heichou?”

“No.  Why would I like Heichou?  He knocked my tooth out!”

Armin giggles, muttering ‘true’ under his breath.  Eren realizes they’re both near the end of the line.  There aren’t many people left and Eren’s anxiety level is through the roof.  “Who is it then?”

Eren shakes his head, not because he doesn’t want to tell, more because he’s too scared of what will happen if he does.  “No way.  I won’t say until you do.”

“Well, I’m not telling until you do, either,” the blond counters, crossing his arms across his chest.  Eren takes a step closer.  “I said it first, so you have to tell me,” he says and Armin scoffs, but he’s smiling.  “That’s not fair!” he says and Eren isn’t sure when he got so close.  “Well, what do you want me to do?” he asks almost rhetorically, finding himself in the blond’s personal space, but neither of them comment on it.  “I don’t know!  You won’t tell me — can you show me?  Can you write it down or point them out or something?”

He blinks.  “You want me to show you?”

Somewhere in his heart, the pang of fear intensifies, trying to convince him to just walk away.  But they’re so close and Eren can smell Armin’s scent.  He can see the blush on his cheeks and it’s even more beautiful up close.  He notices the quickened breathing that’s so soft, it’s almost inaudible.  Everything is pointing him this way, he might as well go for it.  “Yeah.”

Eren isn’t sure what drives him forward, but the next moment, his lips are pressed to Armin’s.  The blond seems surprised, unmoving, and suddenly Eren’s afraid he’s messed up.  But then soft lips are moving gently against his and he lets himself relax.  They break away only to come back again and when they finally separate to breathe, Eren smirks.  “Alright, I showed you.  Now you have to tell me.”

Armin plays along, biting his lip as he smiles.  “Actually, I’m not so sure I want to say.  Maybe I should show you too.”

“Maybe you should.”

Armin reconnects their lips and Eren’s arms wrap themselves around his waist, pulling him closer.  Eren realizes how much he’s longed for this moment and despite the ostensible need for this to be perfect, he finds himself kissing harder.  Armin doesn’t object, letting out a soft moan, parting his lips to allow Eren’s tongue to slip into his mouth.  They’re suddenly kissing like the world is going to end when they pull away.  Fast, hard, breathless.  Eren thinks this is probably making up for years of lost time.  All the time he and Armin could’ve spent doing this instead of dancing around the topic of where their feelings lay.  But then Eren’s lungs are burning and he forces himself to pull away, leaving the blond’s lips a bit swollen.  Ocean eyes meet emerald and Eren tries to catch his breath, taking a moment to get lost in Armin’s eyes.  But then he lets out a breathy laugh and grins stupidly.  “I like you if you couldn’t tell,” he says and the blond giggles.  “Yeah, I could tell,” he mumbles, connecting their lips again for a lingering kiss before pulling away.  He smiles.  “I like you too.”

#eremin #erearu #erenxarmin #fanfic #fanfiction #fan fiction #erenjaeger #arminarlert #snk #shingeki no kyojin #attack on titan #writing #my wrtiting #i had eren say he wouldn't like levi because he knocked his tooth out because i thought people would get mad if i said he was twice his age #but he is twice his age #essentially #just throwing that out there

[karaliswrites]

Blind

The one where Jean is gay for Marco and gives Eren some advice.  Totally not at all similar to another fanfic I read why does this keep happening.  Some spoilers

~~~~~ Jean is fed up.  He’s tired of spending day after day having to listen to them constantly worry about each other.  It’s annoying.  And incredibly painful to watch.  The words and touches are more caring, they linger — it isn’t normal by any means.  And yet, they still are too blind to notice anything.  

Of course, Jean admits he wasn’t too quick on it either, but that’s because it takes a little longer for things to sink in for him.  But it still did, and after a rather short time of knowing them too.  But he’d first started hearing word of it from the beginning.  Rumors started circulating and by the half year mark, the entire cadet corps was trying to help them out.  Because they all saw what was going on and they needed something done about it.  Whether that be to help them be happy together or to stop the gross pining from afar depended on the person.

So, when it’s Jean’s turn for the night shift and he’s paired with Eren, he decides the time has come to give him a piece of his mind just like the others had.  Of course, some had gone to Armin instead, seeing him as the more approachable of the two, but Eren had definitely been informed on numerous occasions.  Jean just hopes that this time, he’ll actually shut up and do something about it.  

The breeze ruffles his hair and he runs a hand through it, trying to calm it, as he lets a soft sigh float away.  He glances at Eren, seeing his eyes trained on the horizon, watching for any sign of a titan.  Jean knew there wouldn’t be much to look at and had chosen to lean back and try to get some rest, but Eren apparently thought something was going to spring out and attack them at any given moment.  But as focused as he is on the task at hand, Jean notices a stiffness about him.  A quick gaze and cloudy eyes that tell him he must be thinking about something.  “You’re worried about him,” he decides to say and sees Eren stiffen even more, his frown deepening.  He doesn’t say anything for a moment and Jean thinks he might be right.  “Now’s not the time for conversation, Kirschtein,” he grumbles and Jean cracks a smile.  He’d never been able to get to the suicidal bastard, but now he knew what made him tick.  The one thing he could discuss that would make him annoyed, but not enough to throw a punch.  Because deep down, Jean thinks, Eren knew he was right.

“There’s nothing out here, why not pass the time with a little conversation?” he asks, folding his arms behind his head and stretching his back.  He sees him roll his eyes, but he doesn’t say anything, so Jean does for him.  “Seriously, why are you so concerned?  He’s not a little kid — he can take care of himself.”

“I know that.” he says a bit harshly and Jean loves how much this is getting to him.  Maybe he’s the only one who can finally talk some sense into the brunet.  “Then stop worrying so much.” 

Eren once again falls silent and Jean is getting a bit frustrated.  He thinks over what he can say for a moment before clearing his throat.  “You know, right?”

“Know what?” he asks, but Jean thinks he knows what he’s talking about.  “That he’s . . . y’know . . . into you.”

Eren shifts, falling into a more vulnerable position and Jean has never seen him like this.  “I’ve heard about it.”

Jean chuckles, running a hand over his face.  “So what do you think?  Do you think it’s true?”

“It doesn’t matter what I think.” he says almost immediately and Jean lets out a breath.  “Defensive much?” he says under his breath and Eren turns to him, a fire burning in his eyes.  “What does it matter to you, anyways, Kirschtein?” he spits and Jean just meets his gaze calmly.  “I’m sick and tired of you guys,” he says and sees Eren’s face soften slightly.  “You two are so fucking gone for each other it’s ridiculous and the entire corps has lost their minds.  It’s the most obvious thing in the world and you still haven’t seemed to notice something’s up.  It’s disgusting.  Just fucking grow a pair and kiss him, will you?”

Eren scoffs and turns away and Jean takes that as a personal victory.  “Shut up.  You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Jaeger, when are you gonna stop denying it?”

He falls silent.  “We both know you care about him, so why not just go for it?”

Jean doesn’t know why he’s being so bold with his accusations, but it seems to be working because Eren lets out a sigh.  He puts his head in his hands and Jean is surprised that he might have actually gotten through to him.  He chuckles.  “So even you, huh?” he asks and Jean knows he’s talking about the rumors.  “Even your dense ass thinks something’s up?”

He puts a hand on his chest in offense.  “Excuse me!” he says and sees Eren smile softly and thinks to himself this is strange for them.  They’ve never really had a conversation that didn’t escalate into a full-on fist fight.  “Did you talk to him?” he asks and Jean feels suddenly a little self-conscious, but shakes it off.  “Yeah.  On a mission.  He was worrying himself to death about you and I decided I needed to say something to get him to shut up,” he says and again sees a shadow of a smile on Eren’s face.  “I’ve noticed it too,” he says after awhile and Jean falls silent, listening to whatever he has to say.  “I tried to deny it.  We had always been that way, so I figured people were just being stupid.  But then everyone started telling me and . . . .”

“And you realized that maybe they were right,” Jean finishes for him and he sighs, looking up at the sky instead of at his shoes.  “Yeah.”

“And?”

“And what?”

“You think they’re right?”

Eren pauses for a moment, fidgeting with his fingers.  “Maybe,” he mutters almost silently and Jean has never seen him like this.  He thinks maybe what Eren is feeling is fear, so he decides to go down that path.  “Have you said anything to him about it?”

He shakes his head softly.  “No.  I couldn’t.”

“Why not?  If you think he likes you, what’s the problem?”

“I . . . .  What if he doesn’t?”

Jean gives him a look even though he isn’t looking at him.  “Are you fucking kidding me?” he asks and when Eren turns to him he sees a raw fear there, a vulnerability he’s never associated with him before that makes him wonder if this is really the same Eren he knows.  “He’s obsessed with you.  Even when we first met, I didn’t know what was going on, but I knew the way he acted around you was strange for a friend.  Do you know how much he worries about you when you’re not there?  Have you noticed the times he stares at you when he doesn’t think anyone’s looking?  He’s head over heels for you.”

He inhales sharply, turning away.  “I don’t want to say anything.”

“Because you’re afraid he won’t feel the same —?”

“I didn’t say I was afraid,” he snaps, looking at him with anger before it fades back into fear.  “I just . . . don’t want it to change anything.”

“It won’t.”

“You don’t know that.”

Jean shakes his head before shifting, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees.  “Jaeger, I’m gonna tell you something and you better listen to me.”

Green eyes look to him, seeming almost blue in the dark.  “Armin cares about you.  And even though it’s obvious he’s in love with you, let’s pretend he isn’t for a second.  Even if he just thought of you as a best friend, which he doesn’t, he wouldn’t stop talking to you if you brought up the rumors.  Even if you confessed to him and he didn’t feel the same, he’d still be your friend.  Because he cares about you too damn much to let you go over something as stupid as that.  Now, back to the reality where he wants you so much it’s fucking killing him, if you bring it up, things are going to turn out okay.  I don’t know him nearly as well as you do, but I know that he’s never going to say anything because he’s too scared you’ll reject him.  So if you don’t say anything, you’re going to lose the chance of something amazing.  I should know.”

He suddenly swallows, turning his face, feeling green eyes burn into the side of his head.  “There was someone who I had feelings for who I’m pretty sure liked me too.  But I was too damn scared to say anything.  And the very day I had gathered enough courage to confess, it was too late and they were gone.  Now I’ll never get the chance to say the things I never did.” 

He looks at Eren with watery eyes, but finds he doesn’t really care.  “And goddamnit if that isn’t the biggest regret of my life.”

He subtly wipes his eyes before continuing.  “Jaeger, I’m telling you, you have to do this before it’s too late.  Before you lose him forever or vice versa.  Just talk to him, would you please?  For everyone’s sake, just fucking tell him.  Don’t end up like me.”

Eren takes a moment to look at him and Jean thinks he might just be considering it.  He’s a bit more emotional than he thought he would be, but figures that’s his own fault.  But overall, he’s pleased with what he’s done.

---

A few days go by after that night and occasionally at lunch or dinner, Jean will glance over at where Eren sits with Armin and Mikasa to see his gaze on the blond, a considering gleam in his eyes.  And one day, luckily Jean looks at the right time to catch Eren telling him something with a serious gaze and they’re standing up to go outside.  Jean smirks to himself, thinking he’s finally done something right.  He makes his way over to Mikasa, though it’s more to give them both some time as she’ll probably start to think Eren somehow got himself killed and would probably walk out to see them making out or something similar.  But after awhile, she gets tired of him and stands up, moving to sit next to Sasha instead.  Jean thinks that’s better than checking on Eren and continues to eat his lunch in silent self-praise.  

It’s probably a few weeks later when Jean decides to leave lunch early and he’s walking back to the barracks when he vaguely thinks he hadn’t seen either of them in the dining hall.  He figures perhaps he just didn’t notice or they were sitting somewhere else and silently opens the door to the barracks.  He looks up and immediately wishes he hadn’t as he sees chocolate hair and then blond underneath it, spread like a halo on the pillow of his bunk bed.  They’re kissing and though it’s odd of him to be watching all this, he smiles to himself, proud of what he’s done.  But then he hears one of them make a soft noise of pleasure and sees Eren’s hand reach to the button of Armin’s pants, and he notices the blond is excited.  He quickly covers his eyes and tries not to gag before backing quietly out of the barracks and shutting the door behind him.  He feels a mix of pride that he had somehow convinced Eren to make a move and disgust at how much he had just seen.  But once he’s calmed down and taken a moment to try to erase the image of them from his mind, he realizes he can no longer go into the barracks unless he wants to interrupt them and sit there awkwardly, pretending to wonder why both of their pants look a bit too tight.  So instead, he decides to head back to the dining hall, deciding he will never open a door without knocking ever again.

#eremin #erearu #erenxarmin #fanfic #fanfiction #fan fiction #erenjaeger #arminarlert #snk #shingeki no kyojin #attack on titan #writing #my wrtiting #jean is gay for marco everyone #this was actually really fun to write #even though its dumb and makes no sense #and is exactly like another thing i read that was way better

[karaliswrites]

Chapstick Challenge

Coconut boy and his roommate have some colorful vocabulary

~~~~~

Eren was a professional at disrupting Armin’s peace.  Not that he necessarily disliked it, since the brunet usually had something exciting to tell him or some adventure to take him on, but it came with some side effects.  One of which was triggering a massive jumpscare that sent the blond flying and causing him to nearly fall on his face.  So when Armin’s constantly exuberant roommate burst through the door one uneventful Saturday afternoon, he almost jumped out of his skin.  “Eren!” he cried, dropping the book he had been reading.  The boy giggled.  “Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you.”

“Well, you could’ve knocked before bursting in and screaming at me like it was fucking Armageddon,” he said and Eren just laughed.  It was then he noticed the plastic bag clutched in his hand.  “What’s that?” Armin asked, gesturing to it.  Eren glanced down before returning his gaze back to his best friend, emerald eyes sparkling with sudden excitement.  “Oh, yeah.  So, you’ve heard of the chapstick challenge, right?”

Armin nodded his head hesitantly.  He didn’t really know much about the game, but he had heard a few people talk about it.  “Well, I was going through my bathroom cabinet —”

“Why?”

“Mikasa says it’s a fucking mess in there — not sure how she knows that.  Anyways, I found a bunch of chapsticks,” he exclaimed, pulling them from the bag and holding them out for Armin to see.  “And I was thinking we could try it out.”

Armin gave Eren a chary look but the brunet just smiled.  “Come on, it’ll be fun.  And besides, what else are we gonna do?”

After a moment of thinking it over, the blond decided to give in.  He couldn’t resist when Eren had that expression on his face.  “You have a point.”

The brunet cheered in victory and Armin giggled at his friend’s enthusiasm before he plopped down beside him on his bunk.  “Okay, do you wanna go first?” Eren asked.  “Hold up, I need a quick briefing.”

Eren smiled almost sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck.  “It’s basically — the challenge is one person is blindfolded, or just has their eyes closed — either is fine, and the other puts some chapstick on their lips.  And then . . . the other person has to guess . . . what flavor it is.”

Armin suddenly remembered what this game was.  He had heard stories of couples who gave it a shot just for the hell of it, and of people who finally got to make out with their crushes.  His face was suddenly on fire.  He could’ve said something — something that would point out to Eren that this didn’t seem to him like something normal roommates would be doing over the weekend.  But he didn’t.  He just gave a quick nod, his chest tightening and stomach somersaulting.  “I don’t have a blindfold,” was the sentence that pulled Armin from his inner crisis, and he almost laughed.  “Well, you said we could just close our eyes, right?”

“Yeah, but it’s not as cool that way.”

“Eren, to be honest, a blindfold seems a little kinky.”

Armin felt his heart flutter at the brunet’s laugh.  “You’re probably right.”

“I’m always right.”

“Of course you are.”

The way emerald caught sapphire set the blond’s cheeks on fire, palpitations painful in his chest.  “Alright, do you wanna go first or should I?”

“Uh, I dunno, you I guess.”

Eren reached into the bag and pulled out some chapsticks.  “Close your eyes.”

Armin complied and bit his lip in anticipation.  It seemed as if all of his other senses were on edge — like he could hear a sound at the far end of the room and be able to pinpoint exactly where it came from.  He could almost feel Eren’s presence, his energy, radiating around him, encompassing him in a feeling of being sucked into a tidal wave.  His entire world was spinning and nothing had even happened yet.  But then he felt his best friend inch closer, warm hands settling on the sides of his face.  “Alright, Arlert, pucker up,” he joked and Armin was too taken aback to respond.  This was actually happening.

A soft pair of lips collided with his own and he almost let out a squeak of surprise despite knowing it was going to happen.  Eren’s lips moved softly against his and his mind went suddenly blank.  He began to kiss back gently, feeling a bit light-headed at the contact.  But then reality slapped him in the face.  This was a game.  Eren was kissing him for a reason.  And he was supposed to be focusing on guessing the flavor.

The brunet pulled away and Armin licked his lips, trying to gather any trace of the chapstick he could find.  “I’m gonna say . . . mint?  Peppermint?”

“You are correct, sir,” Eren said, putting the used chapstick aside from the others.  “That was a warm-up.  I won’t go easy on you from now on.”

He searched through various different flavors before finally seeming to decide on one.  “Oh, this is great.  Okay, close your eyes.”

His eyes were already closed and he puckered his lips slightly despite himself.  He could almost feel Eren’s mouth and he felt himself shiver.  There was a moment of silence and Armin assumed Eren was applying the lip balm before a hand cupped his cheek and he was being kissed again.  The second one was somehow better than the first.  He was a bit more confident this time, moving his lips against Eren’s with a bit more force.  He couldn't tell what chapstick it was, so he kissed harder, hoping maybe he could get more of a taste.  Thankfully, Eren recognized his dilemma and tentatively licked at his bottom lip, causing him to gasp.  He parted his lips and ran his tongue along the seam of Eren’s mouth and realized this was a much better way to figure it out.  He pulled away and smiled triumphantly.  “It was mango, wasn't it?”

“Two for two, nice.  How are you so good at this game?”

Armin shrugged.  “What can I say?  I must have a sensitive palate.”

“Sensitive palate, my ass.  You just know how to kiss.”

He blushed at the statement, suddenly at a lack for words.  “Thanks?” he asked uncertainly and Eren chuckled.  “This'll be the last one.”

Armin let out an almost inaudible whine that Eren, much to the blond’s humiliation, heard.  He flushed profusely and Eren said, “Don't worry, we’ll switch afterwards.”

With that, he brought their lips together again and Armin didn't hesitate to lick Eren’s bottom lip, even taking it between his own and sucking lightly.  The groan Eren let out almost made his heart stop, but he focused on the taste rather than the way he was reacting.  He readjusted and when he returned to further investigate the flavor, his tongue was met with another and he let out something between a whimper and a squeak.  But he let Eren do whatever he wanted, in the process coming to a possible conclusion.  Eren pulled away and Armin nearly whined at the loss of contact.  “I'm gonna say . . . It tasted like sugar . . . but really weird sugar . . . was it cookie dough or something?”

“Cake, but that's pretty fucking close.”

Armin considered that a personal victory and felt himself relax a moment before the chapsticks were being pushed into his hands.  “If I don't get the same score as you, I’m gonna punch myself in the face.”

Armin giggled.  “Don't do that, Eren, that's not good for you.”

He looked through the various flavors of chapstick, finding one that was a relatively familiar taste.  Eren had started with an easy one and so would he.  Armin uncapped the lip balm and applied it to his mouth, watching Eren’s face, his eyes already closed.  His eyelashes brushed his cheeks ever so slightly, the soft curve of his smile seeming to draw Armin in.  He had the incredible urge to kiss him, and so he did.  

The blond took Eren’s face in his hands, pressing their lips together softly.  Eren kissed back and they began a slow and gentle rhythm and Armin melted.  He liked kissing Eren and it felt more amazing than he had hoped.  Not that he thought about it a lot or anything.

He pulled away and Eren licked his lips for a second before looking at him and saying, “Cherry?”

Armin nodded and the brunet smiled, cheering ‘yes’ a little under his breath and the blond giggled.  “Alright, Jaeger, close your eyes,” he said and Eren immediately obeyed.  Once he was ready, Armin leaned forward again, kissing him a bit harder.  Eren didn't seem to mind, even opening his mouth and running his tongue along Armin’s bottom lip.  But then, just as the blond was about to take it a step further, Eren pulled away.  “Is that coconut?”

“Right again.”

Armin tried to find one that Eren wouldn't be able to guess.  One that would let them keep kissing until he finally could.  He found one that he thought might work and put it on before kissing him again.  Eren let out a confused noise and Armin’s stomach twisted.  Maybe he wouldn't be able to guess it after all.  Armin kissed him harder, feeling the familiar sweep of Eren’s tongue against his bottom lip.  But then he took it between his teeth, rolling slightly and Armin actually moaned.  For a second he was embarrassed, but felt Eren smile, doing it again seemingly harder.  Armin felt about ready to explode and out of instinct he pulled away.  Eren licked his lips for a second, staring off into space.  “Any guesses?” he asked nervously.  “Hmmm.  You know, I don't think I got a good taste of that one.  Might have to try again,” Eren said, trying and failing to hide his smirk.  Armin giggled before kissing him again and Eren didn't hesitate to nibble on his bottom lip.  He felt Eren’s hands settle on his hips, his fingers gently slipping under his shirt and sending shivers down his spine.  Armin tried to catch his breath and return the kiss at the same time, but it wasn't working very well.  Something about the way fingers were tracing the curve of his back, the way Eren’s tongue slipped past his lips and into his mouth, had him falling apart in a matter of moments.  Armin moaned rather loudly, his body instinctively arching forwards into Eren to meet his touch.

The blond pulled away, a feeling of absolute mortification sinking low in his stomach.  He flushed in embarrassment, his lips swollen from the kiss, expecting some sort of rejection from Eren.  But the boy did no such thing.  He just smirked and reconnected their lips, kissing him again.  In response, Armin wrapped his arms around Eren’s neck, trying desperately to keep up with the quick pace the boy’s lips were setting.  And then he was falling backwards onto the mattress, his fingers tangling in chocolate hair, every tiny moan and whimper being caught by Eren’s mouth, his hips squirming as he became a little too excited.  But suddenly Eren pulled away, a look of triumph on his face.  “Was that caramel?” he asked and for a moment Armin was incredibly confused.  Why had Eren stopped kissing him to ask such a ridiculous question?  But then he remembered and managed a smile.  “Yep, you got it,” he breathed, still a bit dazed.  He tried to hide his disappointment and sat up, stuffing the various chapsticks into the bag and ignoring emerald eyes.  “I actually really liked that one,” he said and Armin turned to face him.  “Yeah?” he asked softly and Eren smirked.  “Yeah.”

When their lips collided, Armin didn’t dare hesitate.  He kissed Eren back, his hands darting to his sides and gripping at his shirt.  The brunet pushed him back on his bunk, swinging a leg over his hips and pinning his wrists to the mattress.  Armin couldn’t help letting out a soft moan, but it was muffled by Eren’s mouth on his own.  He lowered his kisses to the blond’s neck and the boy bit his lip, trying desperately to keep quiet.  “Eren…,” he gasped and he continued licking and sucking down his neck and to his chest.  Armin closed his eyes and thanked whatever deity he could think of for creating this challenge.

#eremin #erearu #erenxarmin #fanfic #fanfiction #fan fiction #erenjaeger #arminarlert #snk #shingeki no kyojin #attack on titan #writing #my wrtiting #ive never played this game can you tell #i also dont interact with humans especially when it comes to conversation #so idk how to dialogue #this is kinda gay #little nsfw but eh its just a hint #im willing to post just hints on here #i think i might be safe #who knows