lavender-moonzxx

[lavender-moonzxx]

I'm really struggling rn honestly. Like school work wise.. Like there's no notes or like do this plz in my binder or phone. And I'm so confused I have no clue what I'm meant to be doing. I feel like everything I've learned is pretty much gone. Like everything looks foreign and I'm like wth is this?? I've never seen this before. Conjugation of spanish verbs? What's a conjugation..? IDFK but I've gotta figure it out bc I'm the one in the body. It literally feels like my brain just hit reset for the new year and now everything is like?? I feel like I've learned this but at the same time, What is this and how am I supposed to complete it?

#studying sucks #dissociative identity disorder #actually did #actually dissociative #actually multiple #this is fun #idk what im doin lol #-Nova #I'm so confused #brain.exe stopped working

[lavender-moonzxx]

Hey, It's Niyah I just wanted to do a little update on how we've been doing lately and like just life things. My system and I haven't been doing the best lately.. Hence the sort of break we took from this account. The holidays especially New Years are sort of a difficult time of year for us as it is for many other systems. Us personally we don't really have to spend time with our family (my mom's side that is) on Christmas. (That doesn't stop her family from being toxic towards us though.🙃) New Years however and a period of time following it are an especially triggering for a few of our alters, one of them being Anna. Mostly because we've struggled in the past and even now with eating and like weight and all that. Then there's sometimes the expectations surrounding the holiday to start to lose the weight gained during winter. Or start working on your "summer body" I know this isn't like all that New Years is about its obviously mostly just a time where people like to have a fresh start hence the like healthy eating and working out and stuff. But idk it's just a bit triggering for us personally. Anyways more recently we've had a lot of stuff going on in our system. We've gotten a few new alters. One of our alters who went dormant back in like Mid April/Early May has recently come back. Her name is Lola btw shes a fictive. Also Luka our caretaker went dormant for like 2 and a half weeks. He just disappeared nobody knew where he was and no one could reach him. Which was incredibly stressful because he's a caretaker and takes care of the littles and helps us manage a lot of our stress and anxiety. Then like a few days ago they both just popped up in the headspace maybe like an hour after one another. Lola's disappeared before and like when she came back it was with Luka and I found out from Gigi that she was just staying in a house in the woods with him and like just casually moved in with him. So idrk what that was about. It's possible that maybe he just went to go find her. But I'm not entirely sure. I hope to be doing an updated more in depth meet the Alters post including some of our faceclaims sometime soon because the one we did when we first started this account wasn't really that great. Honestly there just wasn't much effort put into it and not all of our alters have faceclaims so it felt sort of weird including them and some I just don't have the greatest communication with. But hopefully I will be able to get Gigi's help with that. She's like an internal self helper sort of she just knows a lot about the things going on in the system and usually when there's a split or new alter that's just been created for some reason she's the first to know. So hopefully that will be coming soon. That's pretty much all that has been going on for us recently. I know that the winter is a difficult time for most systems so I hope everyone stays safe and warm. Have a New Years if your celebrating and if you're having to spend time with a toxic family stay strong. You've got this and we believe in you!❤

~ Niyah (Host of the Astara System)

#update #sorry for being so inactive #actually did #actually dissociative #actuallymultiple #actually a system #life update #this is kinda long sorry. #mental health #Stay safe ❤ #We love you

[lavender-moonzxx]

[lavender-moonzxx]

Hey its Gigi, our asks are now open. So feel free to ask anything you like it doesn't have to be just DID related. ❤

#send us asks #send us questions #asks are now open! #asks are welcome #ask me anything #ask me any question #system asks #actually dissociative #dissociative identity disorder #asks open #ask game #actuallymultiple #actually did #actually a system #-Gigi

[lavender-moonzxx]

To whoever may need this: I love you. Your emotions are valid. Stay strong things will get better.

Stay safe lovelies💕

-Niyah

US Helplines:

Depression Hotline: [phone]

Suicide Hotline: [phone]

LifeLine: 1-800-273-8255

Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386

Sexuality Support: 1-800-246-7743

Eating Disorders Hotline: [phone]

Rape and Sexual Assault: 1-800-656-4673

Grief Support: 1-650-321-5272

Runaway: 1-800-843-5200, 1-800-843-5678, 1-800-621-4000

Exhale: After Abortion Hotline/Pro-Voice: 1-866-4394253

Child Abuse: 1-800-422-4453

UK Helplines:

Samaritans (for any problem): 08457909090 e-mail [email protected]

Childline (for anyone under 18 with any problem): 08001111

Mind infoline (mental health information): 0300 123 3393 e-mail: [email protected]

Mind legal advice (for people who need mental-health related legal advice): 0300 466 6463 [email protected]

b-eat eating disorder support: 0845 634 14 14 (only open Mon-Fri 10.30am-8.30pm and Saturday 1pm-4.30pm) e-mail: [email protected]

b-eat youthline (for under 25’s with eating disorders): 08456347650 (open Mon-Fri 4.30pm - 8.30pm, Saturday 1pm-4.30pm)

Cruse Bereavement Care: 08444779400 e-mail: [email protected]

Frank (information and advice on drugs): 0800776600

Drinkline: 0800 9178282

Rape Crisis England & Wales: 0808 802 9999 1(open 2 - 2.30pm 7 - 9.30pm) e-mail [email protected]

Rape Crisis Scotland: 08088 01 03 02 every day, 6pm to midnight

India Self Harm Hotline: [phone]

India Suicide Helpline: 022-27546669

Kids Help Phone (Canada): 1-800-668-6868

FREE 24/7 suicide hotlines:

Argentina: 54-0223-493-0430

Australia: 13-11-14

Austria: 01-713-3374

Barbados: 429-9999

Belgium: 106

Botswana: 391-1270

Brazil: 21-233-9191

China: 852-2382-0000

(Hong Kong: 2389-2222)

Costa Rica: 606-253-5439

Croatia: 01-4833-888

Cyprus: 357-77-77-72-67

Czech Republic: 222-580-697, 476-701-908

Denmark: 70-201-201

Egypt: 762-1602

Estonia: 6-558-088

Finland: 040-5032199

France: 01-45-39-4000

Germany: 0800-181-0721

Greece: 1018

Guatemala: 502-234-1239

Holland: 0900-0767

Honduras: 504-237-3623

Hungary: 06-80-820-111

Iceland: 44-0-8457-90-90-90

Israel: 09-8892333

Italy: 06-705-4444

Japan: 3-5286-9090

Latvia: 6722-2922, 2772-2292

Malaysia: 03-756-8144

(Singapore: 1-800-221-4444)

Mexico: 525-510-2550

Netherlands: 0900-0767

New Zealand: 4-473-9739

New Guinea: 675-326-0011

Nicaragua: 505-268-6171

Norway: 47-815-33-300

Philippines: 02-896-9191

Poland: 52-70-000

Portugal: 239-72-10-10

Russia: 8-20-222-82-10

Spain: 91-459-00-50

South Africa: 0861-322-322

South Korea: 2-715-8600

Sweden: 031-711-2400

Switzerland: 143

Taiwan: 0800-788-995

Thailand: 02-249-9977

Trinidad and Tobago: 868-645-2800

Ukraine: 0487-327715

(Source)

[lavender-moonzxx]

Me liking a bunch of posts from other did blogs and just random things on my tl:

VS

Me actually making an effort to post things on my own blog:

[lavender-moonzxx]

A quick and dirty DID reference

A very special person to us is trying his hardest to understand us and how we relate to each other. Sometimes it is so hard to explain with words so I decided to make these visual aids for him and anyone else who might be going through the same.

Imagine it like a cone, the white being the highest point of awareness and the black being the lowest. Some of us stay higher and some lower. Sometimes we move freely between the areas but sometimes we can’t control it.

We are not always fully in a certain area, sometimes we are between. Occasionally we do something we think of as merging or blurring. We kind of fade into each other and become something between, taking on attributes of both. This often leaves us feeling like we aren’t completely sure who we are.

We all have different relationships with each other. Some of us get along great and hang out a lot, some of us don’t get along. Some of us don’t like socializing at all and avoid people. The relationships can be platonic, romantic, volatile, or like family, it all depends. 

[lavender-moonzxx]

Hi guys sorry we've been so inactive, these past few weeks have been incredibly stressful. But this semester is finally over, so hopefully we'll be posting more often.

-Niyah

#actually did #did system #actually multiple #we're back #actually dissociative #dissociative identity disorder

[lavender-moonzxx]

might fuck around and let nature reclaim me

[lavender-moonzxx]

My dear lgbt+ kids, 

Just quickly want to send a few good intentions your way: 

If it’s still early in the day for you, I hope you’ll have a good day. I hope you’ll receive good news today or at least receive many chances to smile, laugh, feel warm and safe. You deserve it. 

If it’s late in the day for you, I hope you’ll get a chance to relax and unwind. I hope sleep will come easy to you tonight and you will wake up well-rested and happy tomorrow. You deserve it. 

With all my love, 

Your Tumblr Dad  

[lavender-moonzxx]

[lavender-moonzxx]

Hi, your reminder that:

New alters/headmates split due to the inability to process or integrate trauma or no current alters are capable of handling the situation 

Meaning that new splits are caused by trauma/acute stress/reintroduction of trauma

Alters/headmates do not split without reason

You cannot create new alters/bring new alters into the system by choice

New splits take time (from experience, generally weeks)

Fictives are not fictionkin

Fictives are not alters who are kin with a specific character

Alters are not the only symptom of DID/OSDD-1b

BPD cannot cause the formation of a system

Schizophrenia cannot cause the formation of a system

Being part of a system is more than just “feeling like a different person”

One singular traumatic event does not cause DID

[lavender-moonzxx]

[lavender-moonzxx]

To anyone with a Fear of Failure:

Don't be afraid to not have everything planned out. It's alright to not know what you want. Maybe nothing makes sense and that's okay. Like maybe it'll never make sense and that's also okay. Life doesn't have to be perfectly planned out in order to be good. Don't stress it too much. Allow yourself to make mistakes whether big or small. Make mistakes. You can only learn from them and grow and get better at making mistakes.. It's okay to not be perfect as cliche as that sounds. It's alright to not have it all figured out. What fun would life be if everything went your way? Most likely you wouldn't learn anything and you wouldn't have made the mistakes that have lead or will eventually lead you to better things. I was sort of trying to avoid saying it but everything happens for a reason and that doesn't mean the reason has to be a good one. It just is one. You will get through this. You always have. This is just one tiny bump in the road of life. ❤

#fear of failure #actually did #dissociative identity disorder #feeling overwhelmed #to anyone who need to hear it #you will be okay #you will be happy #you will get through this #you will get better #just hold on #Nini and Niyah co-con #i love you #everything will get better #you are valid #you are valuable #your emotions are valid #its okay to not be okay

[lavender-moonzxx]

I’m so so stressed I have so many assignments to catch up on before this semester ends and I have the worst headache rn. I honestly just want to go to sleep but I have work to do. I wanna cry

#stresspost #stressed out #lowkey panicking #actually did #DID System #dissociative identity disorder #i have a headache

[lavender-moonzxx]

Hey guys it's Nini, I just wanted to say thanks for all the likes on the last post. I really appreciate it💕

#thank you #actuallydid #actuallymultiple #~Nini #i love you guys #thanks

[lavender-moonzxx]

Gentle Reminder:

You are valid. Your emotions are valid. You exist. You are loved and you deserve to heal and be happy. 💙💜💙

~ Nini

#gentle reminder #happiness #positivevibes #you exist #actually did #actuallymultiple #dissociative identity disorder #positivity #you will be okay #ur valid #~Nini